by Lynn Austin
“We’ll ask Nana and Granddad for the rest,” Eve heard Harry say as she switched off the light. “They always buy lots and lots of presents.” Eve started to argue but knew it was true. She looked at Audrey helplessly.
Eve went into the kitchen with Audrey afterwards, talking while they washed and dried the dishes. “I had only been in America for a few months last Christmas,” Audrey said as she rinsed suds off a plate, “and I wasn’t familiar with all of the Christmas traditions. But I do remember that my in-laws gave Bobby a great many toys, and it did seem a bit too much. I guess I was so overwhelmed by the love Robert’s parents showed Bobby and me that I didn’t want to speak up about all the toys.”
“I’m quite sure Nana Barrett will repeat her performance this Christmas. She does it every year.” Eve and Harry had spent every Christmas with the Barretts since Harry was a baby, and while she still felt uncomfortable with the extravagant generosity, she had come to expect it. Harry, of course, didn’t have any problem with it at all. Until last year, Eve had allowed the Barretts to believe she and Harry were their daughter-in-law and grandson, and it was only by God’s grace that they still wanted to maintain a close relationship with Eve after she confessed her deception.
“Even if the Barretts can afford every toy in the Wish Book,” Audrey said, “I don’t want Bobby to grow up craving so many things—or expecting to get them. It isn’t right.”
Eve wiped a plate dry and put it in the cupboard. “I remember being grateful for just a few simple gifts at Christmas when I was their age. I would hang my stocking on my bedpost for Father Christmas to fill, and in the morning, I’d find a little doll or a toy on top . . . maybe an orange and some candy. Granny would knit new mittens or a hat for me. I learned later that Mum had saved up for months to buy me those things. She always had to work on Christmas Day, but we could spend Boxing Day together.” Eve wondered if her mum had felt the same sense of loss at missing out on her child’s life because of her need to work.
“I remember how our gardener would cut armloads of greens and holly branches,” Audrey said, her hands submerged in the soapy dishwater. “Wellingford Hall looked and smelled so splendid. There would be a huge tree and presents to unwrap, chosen by my tutor, Miss Blake, I’m sure. Not by my parents. And we always had Christmas crackers to pop open at the table. But best of all, Alfie would be home from boarding school for a few weeks.”
They worked in silence for a few moments, Audrey scrubbing a pot with a Brillo pad. Eve supposed they were both remembering Audrey’s older brother, Alfie, and how much they had both loved him. “During the war,” Audrey said, “we were grateful if we got through Christmas without being startled out of our beds in the middle of the night by air-raid sirens, remember?”
“Oh yes. And I remember how the American GIs would hold sprigs of mistletoe over our heads at the Christmas dances so they could steal a kiss.”
Audrey fell silent again, and Eve knew she was thinking of her husband, Robert. “I want Harry to have lovely memories of Christmas, but I don’t think getting every toy in the Wish Book is going to accomplish it. Besides, I can’t spend wads of money on presents with my budget.”
“My brother felt entitled to anything and everything he ever wished for, and it ruined him in the end. I don’t want that to happen to Bobby. Is there some way we can teach them not to want so much?” Audrey handed Eve the pot to dry and pulled the stopper from the sink.
“I don’t know. I’ll have to think about it. But I agree. They need to learn that Christmas is more than getting every toy they could ever wish for.”
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A Note from the Author
Chasing Shadows was not an easy novel to write. My goal in writing each of my books is to proclaim God’s love and bring hope to readers. Telling the story of life in the Netherlands during World War II meant that I had to take readers to some very dark places. I pray that in doing so, I also showed how faithfully Jesus walks beside us through those dark valleys.
I have grown to dearly love the Netherlands and its people after visiting several times on book tours, and I’ve always wanted to make it the setting for one of my books. I had a little knowledge of how much the Dutch people suffered during the war after reading two autobiographies years ago—The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom and Things We Couldn’t Say by Diet Eman. I can’t begin to put into words the profound effect these books and these two women had on my faith. Both Corrie and Diet were Christians—living normal lives, falling in love, and making plans for the future—until the surprise Nazi invasion of their neutral nation on May 10, 1940. Both women’s faith in God proved strong and dynamic when put to the test. Their lives challenged me to question the vitality of my own faith if I were to be tested in such an overwhelming way.
Many of the incidents in this story are based on true accounts of courageous Dutch Christians who lived through the Nazi occupation. Ernst Lubbers is based on the real-life musician Max Ehrlich, a popular actor and theater director who staged musical productions while imprisoned in Westerbork. He died in Auschwitz in 1944.
In reading historical accounts of the Dutch experience, I was surprised and amazed to hear secular historians give credit to the church and to people of faith for withstanding the darkness. The Nazis considered the Dutch their Aryan brothers and hoped to incorporate them into the Reich. But Dutch Christians answered to God above all and refused to give in to the Nazis’ evil demands—even at the cost of their lives.
I pray that we’ll never have to endure what Christians in the Netherlands did. But it’s my hope that Chasing Shadows will lead readers to take a closer look at their own faith, as I did after reading The Hiding Place years ago. I remember wanting a faith like Corrie and her family had and like Diet Eman and her fiancé had. I pray that this novel will inspire you to pursue a closer walk with God and lead to a commitment to serve His Kingdom with whatever gifts He has given you.
God bless you all!
Lynn
Acknowledgments
Giving birth to a book has many similarities to giving birth to a child. Each novel begins as a tiny seed of an idea, then slowly develops and grows over time until that joyful and sometimes-painful moment when the new “baby” is finally ready to meet the world. And giving birth to either a baby or a novel is something I could never do alone. I’m grateful for this chance to thank the many, many people who have helped me give birth to Chasing Shadows.
My husband, Ken, is always vitally important in my writing just as he was, of course, with our actual children. He’s my first reader, plowing through my half-finished chapters and unresolved plot ideas and listening to me ramble on and on about what might or might not happen. Ever since that long-ago day when I first said, “I think I want to try writing a book,” Ken has been my most enthusiastic cheerleader. He never stopped believing in me, even when I sometimes stopped believing in myself.
Our son Benjamin, who earned his doctoral degree at Leiden University, was an invaluable help in writing this book, teaching me all about that lovely city and showing me (and my characters) how to get around. We also bicycled out of Leiden into the Dutch countryside one memorable day to where Lena and Pieter’s imaginary farm would be located.
My longtime friends and fellow writers Jane Rubietta and Cleo Lampos have been vitally important to every book I have written. We have been meeting and critiquing each other’s work for more than twenty-six years, before any of us was ever published, and I’m quite certain that I couldn’t write a book without them.
My nonwriting friends Ed and Cathy Pruim and Paul and Jacki Kleinheksel are also irreplaceable and essential to my writing process. They allow me to air my frustrations, they pray with me, and they offer me spiritual insights and down-to-earth advice whenever I need it. I’m so grateful to all of these friends for keeping me grounded—and for getting me out of my office to go biking and have fun! I’m also grateful to Paul and Jacki for introducing me to Dutch friends who were willing to
share their war stories with me, especially Mary DeBlaay, Jennie Vander Maarl, and Toni Vanluinen.
Christine Bierma is my assistant who is so much more than my assistant! She brought me into the twenty-first century with web pages and blogs and social media and all of that other technology that I still don’t fully understand. She’s the midwife who helps me launch each new book by acting as coach and cheerleader for my amazing launch team. Christine is a partner to me in every way, and I would not want to launch a book without her and her online business, Launch Right.
My publishing partners at Tyndale House have guided and shaped this book into a finished product. Stephanie Broene has been alongside me from the beginning stages and throughout the rewriting, cover design, and marketing processes. I so appreciate her insight and partnership. My editor, Kathy Olson, has patiently guided me through a new way of doing edits and has made it fun and painless. She also made this a much better book. I have loved working with Andrea Garcia and the marketing team, and with Katie Dodillet and the publicity team. You all excel at what you do. So does my amazing literary agent, Natasha Kern. The publishing world is changing so quickly and so dramatically that my writing career would be lost at sea without Natasha’s knowledge and expertise. But more than that, she offered valuable input into this story and gave me encouragement and advice when I needed it most.
I’m indebted to my many friends from Kok/Voorhoeve Publishing in the Netherlands for first introducing me to their beautiful country. They’ve shown me so many wonderful places on my book tours, taught me about their country’s history, and introduced me to the wonderful Dutch people. They helped provide the background and setting for this novel, including a very moving visit to the Westerbork prison camp. I’m grateful to all my Dutch friends who shared their families’ stories of life in the Netherlands during that terrible war.
A warm, heartfelt thank-you to all of you. I wish you God’s richest blessings. Chasing Shadows would not be the same book without you.
Discussion Questions
The three main characters in Chasing Shadows—Lena, Miriam, and Ans—are all in different seasons of life and have different outlooks on the world. Which character did you most closely identify with? Which one was the hardest for you to relate to? How did each woman grow and change as a result of her experiences during the war?
In the prologue, we read that Lena “used to believe that the enemy of faith was doubt.” But by the end of the war, “she’d learned that faith’s destroyer was fear.” Do you agree with this conclusion? Read Hebrews 11. Did these heroes of faith battle doubt or fear or both?
A recurring theme in Miriam’s story is the power of music. Do you have a similar appreciation for music? What form does it take in your life—playing an instrument, singing, listening to favorite artists or genres? Why do you think music can be such a powerful force? How does it help Miriam, both physically and emotionally?
Ans tells Erik that she answers to a higher authority than the Nazis. If God asks her to disobey the authorities (what’s known as civil disobedience), she says she has to obey God, even at the risk of her own life. How do you feel about civil disobedience? What are some other examples from history that come to mind? Are there any moral issues you feel strongly enough about to risk disobeying the law?
In one of Erik and Ans’s conversations about right and wrong, Erik asks, “What can you and I do to stop evil when it’s all over the world?” Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the evil in the world? How have you found ways to make a difference? What advice would you give a friend who has the same outlook as Erik?
Miriam’s father tells her and Avi that his best university students were the ones who asked questions. He says, “I think God likes it when we ask questions.” Do you agree? Can you think of examples from the Bible that point to this being true? How might this idea of questioning God change your prayer life?
After Pieter escapes death from a Nazi firing squad, he tells Lena, “I felt at peace as I knelt there. I thought of that Scripture that says, ‘For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.’ I understood it.” The Scripture he quotes is Philippians 1:21, written by the apostle Paul. What do you know about Paul’s life that might have led him to make this declaration? How does it apply to Pieter’s life? Is this an assertion that you feel able to make? Why or why not?
Ans and her grandfather discuss whether it’s okay to lie for a good cause. He brings up the example of the Jewish midwives lying to Pharaoh in order to save Jewish babies and says, “There’s a difference between lying to save yourself and for your selfish ends—to get yourself out of trouble or make yourself look good—and lying to save another person’s life. A huge difference.” Can you think of other examples from the Bible where someone lied for a “good” reason? How do you feel about passages like these?
Eloise speaks words that inspire Ans and which Eloise goes on to live out: “What good is my life if I selfishly keep it to myself and don’t spend it for others?” How does this reflect a biblical worldview? What are some ways you have been challenged to spend your life for others? What do you find difficult about doing this?
Chasing Shadows deals a lot with impossible choices—trying to decide between two or more options, none of which are really good or right. Miriam and Avi are faced with the impossible choice of whether to separate and entrust their precious baby to strangers, just in hopes of surviving. Have you ever needed to make a decision that had no right answer? Do you think you would make the same choice they made?
Lena’s pastor-father tells his congregation, “Jesus said the most important commandments are to love the Lord your God and love your neighbor. And so, whenever we face a dilemma, we can ask, What is the best way to show our love for God and for our neighbor?” How do various characters in the book choose to show their love for God and neighbor?
After Pieter is deployed, Lena tells her father she’s “never understood why [God] doesn’t answer our prayers if He loves us.” How does her father respond? When you’ve faced a challenging circumstance and it feels like your pleas are falling on deaf ears, what comforts you?
After being invited to join the prison camp orchestra, why does Miriam falter before her first performance? What does Luke 9:23 say about the life of a believer in Christ? Is it too much to ask Miriam to go on with the show?
As the war nears its end, Lena has an interesting conversation with her cousin Truus in which Lena tries to share how she’s changed and how her faith has grown. Truus responds, “Can we please talk about something else?” Do you like to share and analyze like Lena, or would you rather put the past behind you and focus on the future like Truus? Is one way better than the other?
When we go through a major event—whether it’s a personal battle like an illness or the loss of a loved one, or something more widespread like a world war—does it make sense that we would come out the other side changed? In what ways have you experienced change after big upheavals?
About the Author
Lynn Austin has sold more than one and a half million copies of her books worldwide. A former teacher who now writes and speaks full-time, she has won eight Christy Awards for her historical fiction and was one of the first inductees into the Christy Award Hall of Fame. One of her novels, Hidden Places, was made into a Hallmark Channel Original Movie. Lynn and her husband have three grown children and make their home in western Michigan. Visit her online at lynnaustin.org.
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