by Kandi Kayne
Turning to face him again, I took a deep breath, letting it out slowly while carefully considering my next words.
“Stop right there,” he said before I could say anything, walking towards me.
I tried to keep my eyes on his face, but his swinging dick made it impossible. I felt my color rise as the full appreciation for that magic wand settled in - the one that had held me enthralled when I should have been flying out of there like a bat out of hell. Holy crap, I can’t believe he did all that stuff to me with that. My eyes roamed up from there to his trim waist and tightly-sculpted torso. A light sprinkling of dark hair across his chest drew my eyes back down the trail of it that led past his belly button and then lower. His body was better than a Greek god’s; he was like one of those fitness magazine models, but with so much money to his name he didn’t know what to do with it. The ugly painting on the wall directly behind him probably cost more than my scooter had brand new. Seeing all of this together in one spot made me wonder for the hundredth time what he was doing with me of all people.
“You’ve got that look on your face again,” he said.
“What look?” I asked, backing up a step, trying to keep some distance between us.
“The one that says you’re going to try and resist me.” He stopped a few feet away from me.
“Yes. I am, as a matter of fact. You’re being ridiculous. Obviously you got caught up in the … booty love or whatever, and got a little nuts. I totally get that, believe me. But we need to just come back down to earth and be real for a minute, okay? Or an hour. Or how about a year? Because this …” I gestured at him and me and the space between us, “… whatever it is … is not going to work.” I shook my head at the unrealness of it all.
He said nothing. He just stared at me.
Instead of waiting for a response that I knew would never make sense to me and would likely just make me more upset, I leaned down and grabbed my shoes from the floor, walking quickly to the door and ignoring his stony expression.
“It’s not like that, Rose,” he said angrily at my back.
“Yes it is.” I grabbed the handle and pulled the door open. “Thanks for taking care of me when I’d obviously had too much to drink. I’m not really sure why you brought me here and not to my apartment, but whatever. I have to go.” I left the room, slamming the door behind me. Walking quickly down the hall and then the stairs, I stopped only long enough to grab my purse off a table on the landing and shove my feet into my sandals before continuing to the front door.
I stepped out the front door and was surprised to see my roommate’s car pulling into the driveway. What the hell? I walked over slowly as it pulled even with me, trying to figure out how she’d known to come and where I’d be. The passenger window rolled down as she came to stop.
“Hey, chickie!! Sorry I’m late! Come on, lezz go!”
She grinned so hard it was almost painful to look at her, especially when life was such a big pile of crap for me right now. I swallowed the sob that wanted to leap out of my throat.
She frowned. “What’s that face for? Who pooped in your corn flakes?” She gestured impatiently at me. “Come on, come on, we have places to go, people to see, things to do! You can tell me on the way.”
I came down the steps, and opened the passenger door, glancing back at the closed entrance to the huge house. A stupid piece of me almost expected Alexander to come running out to stop me from leaving and declare his undying love. Yeah, right, I scoffed at myself. Grow up.
I sighed, getting in and slamming the car door shut. The clock on the dashboard said nine-thirty in the morning. “Take me back to the apartment,” I said grouchily, wrestling with my seatbelt while staring out the window.
“Sorry, babe. No can do.” She patted my leg before shifting into first gear. “But don’t worry! I’ve got everything aaaaall arranged. You’re going to be feeling better in no time flat, I promise.”
I turned to her, now concerned I’d blown her off. “You’re worrying me right now. Did we have some sort of plan for something that I’ve totally forgotten? I had a lot to drink last night. Total blackout.” I shook my head, so disappointed in myself. “I can’t be held responsible.” I pulled my cell phone out of my bag and started pressing buttons to find my text messages. I have been known to tipsy-text once or twice in the past. Maybe I’d told her to come pick me up and take me somewhere. I had to figure out how much apologizing was in order.
“You can’t be held responsible for what?” she asked.
I looked over in time to see an evil grin fixed firmly in place on her way-too-happy face.
“Were you a bad girl last night?” she asked, glancing down at her phone as we sat at a stop sign, responding to a text she’d just received.
My aching butt said definitely yes. And my heart was in full agreement. “Let’s just say that whatever happened last night, is never ever going to happen again.”
Jessica turned onto the main road, still smiling like a lunatic. “Never say never. Never ever say never ever.”
She giggled at her own wit, ignoring the rest of my dirty looks and complaints all the way to the spa where she’d booked us a day of beauty and relaxation. All of it apparently paid for - tip included - by none other than Alexander Blackstone.
“He said he wanted you to be relaxed and ready for your first week on the team, and my job is to make sure that happens,” said Jessica, pushing me forward into the lobby. “He texted me last night super late, and he apparently emailed some important people so that they’d clear a spot for us here today. Normally this place is packed for weeks in advance.”
The fountain lightly trickling the sparkling water over smooth rocks worked in perfect harmony with the Japanese-style music playing softly in the background. Jessica adopted her best science fiction bad guy voice as we made our way up to the front desk, walking backwards and staring at me with her head down. “Resistance. Is. Futile.”
I went along with her because I was just too tired to fight, and feeling too sorry for myself to think up any valid arguments against relaxing. I stood at the reception counter, my eyes roaming absently around the comfortably cool space as Jessica chatted with the lady checking us in. Her voice faded into the background as my brain shifted over to contemplating the big mess I’d made of my life in such a short period of time. Obviously, Alex had arranged all of this before I’d screwed it up by going too far and before I’d majorly blown him off. He was probably regretting this spa-day right this very second. I sighed. Thank goodness my roommate has money. He’s probably going to refuse to pay. Without her, I’d be washing dishes to get out of here. Do they even have dishes to wash? Maybe I’d have to wash towels or robes …
My morose train of thought was interrupted by my way-too-enthusiastic roommate. “Come on, mopeyhead. Let’s go get spoiled.”
I let her drag me along to the locker rooms. “I’m not a mopeyhead.”
“Shush. No more talking unless it’s to tell me all the dirty bad-girl things you did with mister hot and sexy.”
I rolled my eyes, not just to let her know how stupid I thought her topic of conversation was, but also so I wouldn’t start crying. I’d really screwed things up in an epic way. Regret sucked.
We were floating in the salt-water pool under an already blazing morning sun when the interrogation began.
“All right, that’s enough of the pity party,” declared Jessica. “Tell me everything. And leave nothing out, or I’ll let my imagination run wild, and that’s never a good thing.”
“No, I’m not telling you any of it. It’s too embarrassing.” I could feel the shame heating up my face even more than the sun’s rays already had. The water was doing nothing to cool it down, either.
“Blow job?” she asked, fishing for information a little too loudly.
I sat up in the water, some of it sloshing over my face into my eyes. I recovered quickly and splashed in her direction. “Shhhh! Do you want someone to hear you?”
“
I don’t care who hears me ... Blow job!” she said louder.
“Errrgh! I’m not telling you anything if you’re going to blab it out to the world.” I went back to floating, swirling my hands in circles to move myself farther away from her. I now felt perfectly justified in keeping these secrets to myself. No way could I risk anyone but her knowing my shame, and I was in no hurry for her to know it either, even though a part of me was dying to figure out if I really had killed the spark that I’d felt for a brief moment between Alex and me - not the hot sexy spark, but the sweet one. The one that had my heart going pitter patter and my schoolgirl brain dreaming of something more than just sleeping together and doing the deed. Jessica was really good at reading people and situations, so I wanted to hear her opinion; but that would have to include telling her all the details, and I just wasn’t even sure I wanted to think too hard about them myself, let alone allow my crazy roommate to analyze them.
Jessica’s face popped up in the water right next to mine. “I will take your secrets to the grave with me, roomie.” She kissed me on the cheek quickly before going back to floating right next to me. She held onto my hand, refusing to let me get too far away. “Come on. Talk to me,” she said in a too-loud voice, the water filling her ears and making it impossible for her to judge the proper volume. “Pretend I’m your priest and you’ve come to confess. I’ll start it for you. A-hem. Father, hear my sins. Last night I gave my date a blow job in the front seat of his car.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, lifting my head out of the water so I wouldn’t talk too loudly. “That is so sacrilegious, what you’re doing right now.” I looked around but the few other occupants of the pool area weren’t paying any attention to us. I relaxed a little, thinking my love life was probably not exciting enough for anyone but me to care about it.
“No, it’s not sacrilegious. I’m helping you. I’m like Sister Mary Jessica over here, trying to help you get your dirty thoughts off your mind. Come on, try it. You’ll feel better once you’ve confessed.”
I sat up completely, clearing the water out of my ears and deciding I might as well play along. I knew Jessica well enough to know she wasn’t going to give up until I told her something. The question was, how much should I tell her? “Sister Mary Jessica, I did so many bad things last night, I don’t even know where to start.”
She sat up at my tone and frowned. Reaching out she patted me on the shoulder. “Whatever you’re thinking right now, stop. I’m sure you did everything right. Tell me what it was, and I’ll be the judge.”
I had to smile. “You’re judging me now?”
“Yes. Thumbs up or thumbs down. It’s a simple rating system. Did you, or did you not, give him a BJ?”
I shook my head.
She gave me a thumbs down.
“Thumbs down? Why thumbs down?”
“BJs give women power over men, dummy. You passed on a power play. Easy thumbs-down call. Let’s try again. Did you give him a hand job?”
“Uhhh, no … but I touched it.”
Jessica smiled. “Progress!” Then she frowned. “But sorry, thumbs down. You have to do more than touch it. Let’s move on. Maybe I should start with something simple. Did you kiss him and involve your tongue in the process?”
“Yes. And I also let him do me in the butt, so go ahead and judge that while you’re at it.”
“WHHHAAAAAAAAT?!” screamed Jessica, leaping out of the water and grabbing me by the shoulders. She shook me until I could no longer control my head and keep it from flopping back and forth with the force.
I gripped her back, yelling, “Stop!” while also laughing.
She was beside herself. “You did it in the … oh my god, oh my god, double, triple, quadruple thumbs up, roomie! A whole church full of thumbs up on that one!” She pulled me into a huge hug, squeezing me until I could barely breathe anymore.
“I’m glad you approve. No wait … I’m sad you approve,” I said, over her shoulder. I wasn’t sure what it said about either one of us. Probably that we needed therapy or something.
She pushed me away so we were face to face. “Never ever be sad that I approve of your anal sex.”
I grimaced. “Could we please, for the love of all that is holy, not call it that?”
“Okay,” she said, looking very determined, her eyes not leaving mine for a second. “We’ll call it … back door love.”
I nodded weakly. “I can live with that. Kind of.”
She pulled me into another hug-fest. “You totally popped your back door cherry. I’m so jealous of you!”
“Jealous?” I asked, not believing my ears. “Of me?”
She faced me again. “Of course! I’ve always wondered what that’s like.”
“You could have had … back door love a hundred times by now. I can’t believe you haven’t.” I looked at her suspiciously. “You’re just messing with me.”
She shook her head. “Nope. I’ve never done it. I’ve never been with the right guy.”
“How do you know?” I asked, feeling more vulnerable than I would have liked. “Whether someone’s the right guy or not?”
“You tell me,” she said, putting her hands gently on my cheeks, squeezing them a couple times. “I know you, Rosie. You would never do that with just any guy. Alex Blackstone must be someone special for you to have lowered your guard that much.”
I nodded, tears coming to my eyes, my mouth twitching with barely-held-back emotions. He was special, but that didn’t matter. It didn’t make it possible for us to have a real relationship, no matter how much I might want to dream about it.
“Awww, sweetie, come here,” she said, hugging me tenderly. “It’s going to be fine. I promise. He obviously cares a lot about you. He set this whole thing up last night. He could have just done what other guys do - call you later or not call at all.”
I nodded again. “I know. He’s very considerate.”
She pulled back to look at me. “He’s more than considerate, obviously. So what happened? Can you tell me? Because I really, really want to know. And I swear on your grave I won’t tell a soul.”
I shrugged, wiping my face with some of the salt-water, ignoring the fact that she’d just given me a totally bogus swear of secrecy. “He took me to dinner, we had sex in the bathroom, and then I guess I passed out in his car.”
“Wait, wait, wait …” She put her hand up. “Hold the phone. You had back door love in the restaurant bathroom? Whoa, Rosie, that’s taking it to a whole other level I hadn’t even considered.” She shook her head in either shock or awe, I wasn’t sure which.
I laughed. “No, goof, I didn’t do that. I had regular, standing-up sex in the bathroom. It was when he brought me to his house, after we woke up this morning, that we did the other stuff.”
She shook her head, now definitely in awe. “I bow down to you, oh sex goddess of the United States of Awesome. I am not worthy.” She moved her arms up and down in a gesture of worship.
I slapped them away. “Shut up. I’m no sex goddess. I’m the president of the United States of Idiot, and I ran totally unopposed for the office with a one-hundred-percent approval rating. Seriously. This is going nowhere fast, and I totally blew my chance at my dream job.”
“Why do you think that?” asked Jessica, genuinely confused.
Her stupid question immediately put me on edge. “Do you really have to ask that?” I nearly shrieked at her, slapping the water next to me. In a lower voice, I continued with, “I had back door love with the boss, in his house, after blacking out, and after having sex with him in the bathroom during a dinner meeting! I am the biggest hooker-ho he’s probably ever seen in his entire life!”
She nodded sagely. “You’re right. No wonder he likes you so much. I admire your style. I’m going to try some of your moves on my next date.”
I slapped her lightly, shoving myself away with my feet against the side of the pool. “I can’t talk to you anymore. You’re ridiculous.”
She followed next t
o me, meeting each of my backstrokes with a breast stroke of her own. “I got a text that says otherwise.”
I stopped immediately and treaded water. “What text?”
“The one he sent me on the way here.”
I quit trying to get away and grabbed her arm. “What’d it say?”
She smiled. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” She paddled backwards fast, too fast for me to catch her. She kicked up a lot of water and foam into my face when I tried to pursue her, so I gave up, getting out of the pool and drying off. I knew she wouldn’t be able to stay away from me. She couldn’t keep a secret like that to save her life.
She eventually joined me, smiling like a cheshire cat and obviously very pleased with herself.
“You’re evil, you know that?” I asked.
“Play your cards right, and I’ll tell you everything I know.”
“I’ve already told you all my shame. What other cards do I have?”
“I know, it’s true. Don’t worry, though. I have only one more requirement for you today, and if you follow it, I’ll spill.”
“Okay, what is it?”
“The requirement is that you relax. Seriously, you’re giving me stress wrinkles. Just chill and enjoy this day with me. You’re going to have a very busy week with your new job, and you need to clear your head beforehand.”
“I am?” I asked weakly.
She nodded confidently. “Yes. You are.” She winked once before leaving me to go grab her robe. “Follow me, little gipper. It’s time for our massages.”
I put on my robe and went with her dutifully out of the pool area, determined to follow her relaxation advice for no other reason than I had no better idea about what I should be doing now, and I knew obsessing over Alexander was just a really bad idea.
We walked out of the spa several hours later feeling like wet noodles.
“I’m glad you’re driving. I can barely lift my arms,” I said, strapping myself slowly into my seat.
“I need a chauffeur. Maybe you can call Alex and order us one.” Jessica leaned her head back against her headrest, her eyes closed. She fake-snored for a few seconds before lifting her head again.