She expected it to be very untidy, but surprisingly his clothes were neatly put away behind a curtain and there was little lying about.
She made his bed which, like her own, looked very comfortable, but was much larger. Then she noticed for the first time that facing it on the wall was an Impressionist picture.
She thought it was by Monet or Sisley, she was not sure which, but it was very beautiful.
She stood looking at it for a long time, feeling as if the light in it was something she had always wanted to find, but had never understood until now how beautiful it could be.
Then, as if she must compare it with Adam’s, she went into the sitting room to look at the pictures stacked against the wall.
Some were finished, some were only just begun and had then been discarded.
She felt sure that Adam had a touch of genius in his painting because his method was revolutionary.
But Impressionism was, she knew, unappreciated and roundly denounced by those who admired the traditional techniques of portraying what they saw.
She only wished that her father was with her, to tell her what he thought of Adam’s paintings.
Her instinct, however, told her that Adam was good. At least, if not yet very experienced, going in the right direction so that perhaps one day he would be acclaimed.
‘I hope so, I do hope so!’ she thought fervently, but did not ask herself why it mattered so much.
She had joined Danny at the edge of the sea, when a long time later Adam came back.
Having removed her shoes and stockings so that she could walk comfortably on the sand, she was standing a little way into the water, holding up her skirts to avoid getting them wet, when she heard his voice behind her.
“I am back,” he called, “and I have brought you a mountain of food!”
She turned round to look at him and he exclaimed,
“That is how I should paint you! God, if I could only get it down on canvas!”
She then walked out of the water towards him and he called out,
“Don’t move! Stay where you are!”
Roberta laughed at him.
“The sand is too cold for my feet,” she said. “Besides I want to go and see what you have brought me from the stores.”
“Food! Food!” Adam exclaimed. “Do you never think of anything else?”
“You will be thinking about it in an hour’s time!” Roberta retorted.
Despite Adam’s protests, she walked back towards the house.
“I took so long,” he said, “because I bought both you and Danny bathing suits. Yours is very glamorous and will attract any man who might be watching you.”
Roberta looked up and down the deserted beach.
“Where are they?” she asked. “There is so little sign of human beings that we might be in the desert.”
“Are you telling me,” Adam asked, “that you have been in the desert or was that just a figure of speech?”
“Think what you like,” Roberta answered. “It will give you something to ponder on.”
“Why should you be so mysterious?” he enquired.
“I am not!” she protested.
She knew as she spoke that it was not really because she was being mysterious but because in some strange way Adam could read her thoughts that his intuition told him that, when she mentioned the desert, it was because she had actually been there.
‘I must be careful,’ she warned herself.
Then she knew that was something she somehow could not be when she and Adam were together.
*
Roberta cooked them a large luncheon, thinking it best for Danny’s sake for them to have a light meal in the evening.
It was easy to be proficient on the oil stove which she was sure was both expensive and up to date.
It certainly enabled her to produce dishes that made man, boy and dog enjoy every mouthful.
“You are Wonder Woman!” Adam said as he finished. “In fact, I don’t think that you are real at all, but sent by the Gods to help me when I most needed it.”
“I want to swim in the sea,” Danny piped up as soon as he had finished.
“Not for at least an hour after a meal,” Roberta replied. “But you can put on your swimming suit which kind Mr. Adam has bought for you.”
“Uncle Adam!” Danny corrected. “I like him, so I’ve made him my uncle.”
“And I like you!” Adam said. “So I am going to turn you into a small fish and you will be able to swim far better than they do!”
Danny exclaimed with delight and ran into the bedroom to change.
Only when he and Adam had gone to the beach did Roberta do the same.
She felt a little shy, although she had often swum in Africa when they camped near a like or a river.
Her father and Francine had swum too and she had never given a thought to the fact that she was wearing very few clothes and that no English ladies swam, however hot the summer might be.
She was aware it was something that would horrify her grandmother and that Aunt Emily would add it to the list of sins they had compiled against her father.
The swimming suit Adam had bought her was made of a cheap material and she suspected it was only the poorest and least respectable girls along the coast who dared to bathe in the sea.
It was nevertheless attractive. The colour made her skin seem very white and, while the costume revealed her legs, it had a skirt and sleeves that reached a little above the elbows of her bare arms.
Yet somehow she felt naked as she walked down the steps of the veranda and over the rough ground that led onto the golden sand of the beach.
Danny saw her first and ran out of the water to say,
“Come and watch me swim! I can swim a little way all by myself.”
“That is very clever of you!” Roberta smiled.
“Is Uncle Adam going to teach you to swim too?” Danny asked.
“There is no need for him to do that,” Roberta replied, “for I can swim already!”
She saw Adam coming towards her and ran into the water to strike out, hoping it would surprise him.
Only a few seconds later, when he was swimming beside her did she realise she had succeeded.
“Where did you learn to swim like that?” he asked. “As it could not have been in Paris, I imagine it must have been the desert you spoke so confidently about just now.”
She did not reply and after a moment he said,
“I suppose you know that you are driving me mad with curiosity?”
“I cannot think why you are so interested!”
“That is something I will explain to you a little later, but now, unless you want Danny to drown himself by trying to follow us, I think I had better go back.”
He turned round as he spoke and, because Roberta could not help it, she followed him.
*
Roberta sat on the veranda with Adam, watching the stars coming out in the sky.
An exhausted Danny had been put to bed immediately after supper and, as Roberta kissed him goodnight, he said,
“It’s been a very exciting day, Aunt Roberta!”
“Mama!” she corrected.
“Mama,” he murmured sleepily, “and tomorrow will be – exciting too.”
“Yes, I’m sure it will,” she agreed. “Now go to sleep. You must be very tired after being so long in the water.”
“It was gorgeous.”
Robert knew that this was a word he had picked up from Adam and in a sleepy voice he added,
“Columbus thought it – gorgeous too!”
When Roberta had joined Adam on the veranda, she said,
“Danny says it has been a gorgeous day. I have never heard him use that word until now.”
“It is something you taught me,” Adam explained. “You are a gorgeous girl, who cooks gorgeous food, and it is a perfect word to describe somebody who is beautiful and generous and full of laughter.”
“Then I am very glad to be ‘gorgeou
s’!” Roberta laughed. “But I have never thought of myself like that before.”
“There are a great many other ways of describing you,” Adam said. “Tomorrow I intend to start my picture and nothing you can say or do is going to stop me.”
“I did not deliberately stop you today.”
“You know I could not paint because I could not bear to leave you and Danny by the sea.”
The way he spoke gave her a strange feeling that she had never known before.
Because she was a little afraid of it, she said,
“It has been a gorgeous day but, like Danny, I am very tired.”
“Then you must go to bed,” Adam said. “And thank you, Roberta, for making us all so happy.”
Roberta had risen to her feet and now she raised her face to ask ingenuously,
“Have I really done that?”
It was a childish question because she wanted to be reassured.
She was standing near the edge of the veranda and the moonlight was on her face and turning her golden hair to silver.
As he was so tall, Adam was in the shadow of the roof.
She strained her eyes trying to see the expression on his face.
Then he said in a voice she did not recognise,
“How can I answer that question in words?”
He put his arms round her and pulled her against him as he spoke.
Then, to her great surprise because she had not anticipated it, his lips came down on hers.
Roberta had never been kissed before and, as his mouth held her captive, she thought that she should push him away, but somehow it was impossible.
Then, when she tried to think, everything was swept from her mind except for the strange feeling that seemed to move through her body and into her lips.
It was as if the moonlight was not only outside but inside and she could feel its rays flickering through her until it was impossible to think, but only to feel that she was no longer herself but part of Adam.
His lips were at first gentle and compelling.
Then, as he drew her closer still, they became demanding, possessive and something she had never known before, passionate.
He kissed her until she felt as if her feet were no longer on the ground and she was floating in the sky amongst the stars.
The moonlight was shining through them both and their bodies pulsated with it.
She could feel his heart beating against hers and she knew that this was a wonder and a beauty above anything that she had ever known or imagined.
Then, as Adam raised his head, she suddenly remembered that he was a man she had met only yesterday and that, if anybody knew that she was being kissed in such a manner, they would be shocked and horrified by her behaviour.
With a little cry that had something childlike about it, she pulled herself free of his arms.
Swiftly, before he could stop her, she sped from the veranda into the sitting room and from there into her own bedroom.
Only, as she closed the door behind her, did she feel as if her heart was beating so tumultuously that it might burst from her breast and her breath was coming in little gasps from between her lips.
At the same time, the whole world was filled with a glory that was indescribable.
She knew that, when Adam had kissed her, she had touched the stars and never again would be content with the earth as she had known it until now.
“This is – love,” she whispered to herself.
Then she was afraid because it was so very different from what she had expected.
Chapter Five
Adam was painting Roberta, but not by the sea, as she had expected. Instead he had made her sit beyond the house under one of the trees, which was in blossom.
Because the soil in California was so rich, the wild grass was filled with flowers and in her white muslin gown she looked like a flower herself as the sunshine percolated through the branches above her and turned her hair to solid gold.
He set up the easel and sat on a stool concentrating fiercely on his canvas.
Roberta had not dared to look at him when she went into the kitchen to cook the breakfast and, although they talked in front of Danny of ordinary things, it seemed as though every word they spoke had a different meaning from what they actually said.
“I am going to paint you this morning,” Adam insisted, “and I want no arguments about it.”
“Very well,” Roberta replied, “but if you are hungry by luncheontime, don’t blame me.”
Adam did not answer.
He merely began to collect his paints from the sitting room and, because Roberta knew that it would irritate him if she delayed, she just stacked the plates in the sink and hurried out into the sunshine.
By this time he was halfway towards the place where he wanted her to sit.
Walking behind him she saw how tall and broad-shouldered he was and how he walked with a grace that was surprising in so large a man.
After he had begun to paint and the sun grew a little hotter, he pulled off his shirt impatiently as if it was restricting him.
It was then, looking at him from where she was sitting, that Roberta felt shy.
Yesterday when they had been swimming and he had only worn swimming trunks, she had not thought it at all strange that he should be naked above the waist.
She had been so used to seeing the natives of Africa with very little clothes that nakedness meant little to her and certainly it did not shock her as it would have any other English girl who had not travelled as she had.
Now, because she was in love, she could not help thinking how beautiful Adam’s body was with his square shoulders and narrow hips.
It seemed to her that he was perfectly proportioned like one of Michelangelo’s statues that she had seen in Rome.
It made her blush to think that he had held her close to him and kissed her last night and how wonderful it had been.
‘I love him,’ she thought, ‘but I am sure I mean nothing to him!’
Although she knew something about love because of her father’s many affairs, she had been too young to have anything to do with the flirtatious Frenchmen before leaving France.
Roberta was therefore completely unselfconscious and unawakened where men were concerned.
Now, as she gazed at Adam painting her, she wanted to be in his arms again and to feel his lips on hers.
Then she thought of her grandmother and knew how horrified she would be if she knew where she was at the moment and what she was doing and thinking.
It suddenly struck Roberta that it was very reprehensible that she was staying un-chaperoned in a man’s house and that she was looking at him half-naked and he had seen her swimming in the sea.
‘It’s different away from England,’ she excused herself.
At the same time, she had a feeling of guilt that was uncomfortable.
Danny was playing with Columbus at the edge of the water and she could hear his voice talking to the dog.
The only other sound was the song of the birds in the trees and the murmur of the sea.
‘I am happy,’ Roberta thought. ‘I have never been so happy.’
She knew her happiness was centred on the man who was trying to portray her on canvas.
She must have sat for two hours before he rose from his stool, stood back to look at the canvas on the easel and walked towards her.
“You have been very good,” he said, “and I have done a lot of work. Now I feel it’s a waste of time to be painting when I might be kissing you.”
The way he spoke was a surprise and, when he sat down beside her, she instinctively put up her hands to ward him off.
“How – far have you – gone with my portrait?” she asked and knew her voice trembled.
“Not far enough,” he replied. “Just as it is impossible to capture the sunlight, so I cannot capture your beauty.”
He took her hand in his as he spoke and raised it to his lips.
He kissed her fingers one
by one and then turned her hand over to kiss her palm, a long lingering kiss that made her quiver.
Then he looked into her eyes and sighed,
“I love you and I think, my lovely one, you love me just a little.”
“It is – too soon,” Roberta faltered. “We have only – just met each – other.”
“That is not true. We are in love and it is as if we have known each other for thousands of years and I found you again when I least expected it.”
“I think – actually – I found you!”
“When I saw you standing in the doorway,” Adam went on, “the light was on your face and I thought that I must be dreaming.”
His fingers tightened on hers.
“I knew you had come to me across time and space and you are what I have always been waiting for.”
There was a deep note in his voice that told her he was sincere.
Then, as he put his arm around her, her head fell naturally against his shoulder.
He kissed her forehead before he added,
“We are going to be very happy, my precious. I think it should be warm enough tonight for Danny to sleep on the veranda or as my bed is actually bigger than yours, perhaps you should come to me.”
For a moment Roberta did not understand what he was saying.
Then she stiffened.
“I-I don’t – know what you – mean.”
“Why pretend?” Adam asked. “We love each other and the facts have decreed that you should be mine. What happens tomorrow, the day after or the day after that is immaterial, except that I have no wish, my beautiful, to wait any longer for you.”
Before Roberta could reply he put his hand under her chin, turned her face up to his, and his lips were on hers.
He kissed her demandingly, possessively, as if he was convincing her without words that she belonged to him.
She found herself pulsating with the same rapture that he had given her last night.
Again it was impossible to think, but only to feel sensations she had no idea existed and which seeped through her body and made her feel as if she was a part of everything that lived and breathed.
He raised his head and murmured,
“You have bewitched me and I am going to find it very hard to wait until tonight.”
“You must not – I cannot – I cannot do what you are – saying!” Roberta stammered.
71 Love Comes West Page 9