by Leddy Harper
Finally, she smiled, laughed, and dropped her forehead to the pane of glass. “I’m starting to believe that the universe is messing with us.”
“After everything we already know, does it really surprise you that I’ve stayed in this room before? Or that my friend’s dad knew—or knows—your dad?”
“Not really, but at what point do we stop lying to ourselves?” She pulled her shoulders back and stood up straight, turning to meet my gaze. “At what point do we stop and accept that there is a greater power out there that’s trying to tell us something?”
“What do you think it’s trying to tell us?”
Moira shrugged, though she never dropped her stare. “I’m not entirely sure, but it is obvious that it wants us together—at least in the physical sense.” She blinked and shook her head as if shaking off a stray thought. “I just mean being in the same place at the same time.”
“I knew what you meant.” I didn’t even realize I was smiling until my cheeks started to burn. “But I get what you’re saying. I do believe that there’s a force out there that keeps pulling us together. And whatever it is, it’s bigger than us.”
I only hoped it was also more powerful than her family.
And stronger than any law that would take my little girl away.
I had a feeling that going home wouldn’t be the end of us, even though I wasn’t entirely sure what that would look like. But I couldn’t admit that aloud, for fear it’d scare her away. After all, we’d only shared a handful of days together, and even then, it couldn’t have equaled more than mere hours altogether. I had no idea the extent of my feelings for her, so until I did, I’d keep my opinions about us to myself.
“Want to hear something else that’ll blow your mind?”
Her smile widened until her eyes squinted and her cheeks turned pink, the red lipstick making her teeth appear blindingly white. “Yes, sure…go ahead and tell me something else that’ll blow my mind.”
“I hung out with your brother when he came to the States.”
Just as I suspected, her eyes grew wide, her jaw hung open, and from what I could tell, her breathing had stopped. But what I hadn’t anticipated was the moisture that glistened in her eyes before pooling along her lower lids.
“How?” was all she asked as she blinked away her sudden emotion.
“Well, like you now know, your dad knew Joey’s dad; I guess they came to town to visit them. Joey’s older brother and Daniel were about the same age, so they hung out most of the time, but I do remember a few times when we were all together.”
“How? I mean, how do you know it was my brother you were with?”
“When I saw his picture last night, I thought he looked really familiar, except I couldn’t quite place where I would’ve seen him before. Then you told me what he’d named his boat, and it all came to me. But still, I didn’t believe it until I got back to my room and asked Joey.”
“You…? How…? I mean…”
To help her out, I led her to the couch and took a seat beside her. With our bodies angled toward one another, I held her hand in her lap, looked her in the eye, and gave her all the information I knew.
Chapter 11
Moira
“Like I said, I didn’t spend a lot of time with him—and it was a long time ago. But I do remember being on the pier with him, Joey, and Joey’s brother, Geoff, when he said that he wanted a sailboat and call it Sail-la-Vie.”
I’d met this man when we were little. Kissed him when we were teenagers. Shared coffee with him during one of the darkest times in my life. And now, I was next to him, listening to how he’d spent time with my brother thirteen years ago. I wasn’t sure if I should be scared, sad, or hopeful, so I just sat there and listened as he told me things I never would have known otherwise.
“I only remember it because I thought it was really clever, and ever since then, anytime I’d hear someone say c’est la vie, I’d think of that kid and his sailboat. That’s why when you said that last night, I knew there was no way it could’ve been a coincidence. I doubt there are that many people in this world who’d want to name their sailboat that exact thing.”
The night we had gone to the café for coffee, I’d assumed that Daniel had something to do with Ryan coming into my life. Now, I was convinced of it. While there were many strange occurrences, some completely unexplainable, I doubted that this was one of them.
“Think about it for a second, Ryan.” I squeezed his hand in my lap. “You spent time with my brother on that pier. I went there because he had always said it was his favorite spot in the world. And it just so happened to be where we met—again.”
“Did he ever tell you why it was his favorite place?”
I thought about it for a second, searching my memory for the answer yet coming up emptyhanded. “No, he didn’t.”
“I think I know why,” he said with a growing smile on his lips.
The thought of finding out something about my brother made me hold my breath in anticipation. This was a gift unlike any other, and I doubted he would ever understand just how much this meant to me.
“There was a girl who showed up every day with her dad to fish. I’m pretty sure he had the hots for her. I wasn’t with them all the time, but the times I did go there with them, Daniel would fish right next to her, and they’d spend most of the time talking and laughing.”
Hearing that made my heart happy for several reasons, but the biggest one was the answers it provided. As well as the faith and hope that filled me. In a way, it all seemed to come full circle.
Daniel had met a girl on that pier.
The same pier I’d met Ryan on.
It made it easier to believe that we had Daniel’s blessing, which made the possibility of us seem attainable. I took it as a sign that Ryan and I were meant to be together, I just didn’t know for how long. Forever wasn’t possible; I had accepted that. And with that recognition came sudden reassurance. I knew what I wanted. I wanted Ryan, even if only for right now.
And I wanted all of him.
I momentarily gazed into his eyes, and when he smiled, I melted into him. I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his. Like an electrical current, his warmth traveled through my body until it reached the tips of my toes.
He leaned in a little more and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, gently tugging me closer. Neither of us knew what the future held, but with our lips connected, that didn’t matter. When he used his tongue to open my mouth, deepening the kiss, my chest exploded with butterflies.
Our soft, timid connection became hungry and filled with lust as I crawled into his lap.
I had never been the one to initiate control during the few make-out sessions I’d experienced in my lifetime, but with Ryan, I was comfortable. I had no fear, no worries, no concerns about what I wanted. And I wanted this more than anything.
I placed my hand on his cheek as his tongue danced an erotic tango with mine, both of us desperate for more. I wanted to touch him and feel his skin. I craved every part of him and desired his touch. I had never been so determined in my life—I wanted this man, I wanted him so badly that it was almost a need.
An unfamiliar warmth spread between my thighs, confirming for me that Ryan was the person I was meant to share this moment with. My desire was so intense that it was akin to a wild, animalistic yearning. All thoughts of impending responsibilities and obligations were shoved out of my mind by the heat of his hands as they roamed my body.
As I began to pull at the buttons on his shirt, he covered my fingers and moaned, “No, Moira. We can’t do this.”
“What do you mean?” My words were breathless and throaty.
“We can’t do this,” he repeated as he carefully lifted me off his lap and set me on the cushion next to him. “This is headed to a place we won’t be able to come back from. Some things you can’t undo. Our future is laced with such uncertainty that I can’t do this with you. I shouldn’t. It isn’t right.”
My throat
constricted with emotion, my eyes pleading with his. “Ryan, please… For one minute, let me forget about precedence and what is expected of me. Just for this one moment in time, let me belong to you. I want to give myself to you. Please, don’t tell me what I can or can’t or should or shouldn’t do. This one time, just let me do what I want.”
We sat in silence for several seconds, both of our chests heaving from the intensity of the moment. When he finally nodded, I excitedly tugged at his shirt until his chest was left bare. Running my fingers along his taut skin, I pulled a moan from his throat.
Ryan trailed the tip of his tongue down my neck, which evoked quiet mewing from my lips. The smell of his cologne invaded my senses, and the gentle rub of his stubble against my face made my skin tingle. Before I knew it, I was on my back, Ryan hovering above me, the heat of his chest transferring to mine.
My mind was void of thoughts as he did wonderful things to my ear. I would’ve let him continue that forever, but the ache between my thighs made that impossible. I pulled at his belt and frantically tried to push his pants over his hips in a desperate attempt to undress him. I needed to be closer to him, and that wouldn’t happen as long as we were still wearing clothes.
He pulled away just enough to look into my eyes. “Are you sure?”
The corners of my mouth curled into a goofy grin. “I have never been more sure of anything else in my life.” I hooked my legs over his hips and pulled his body closer.
“Oh, God. You’re going to kill me.” His gasps and throaty words only urged me on.
I had never felt more like a woman than in this moment. I never wanted it to end. I wanted to spend endless days and nights with him—naked, exploring one another. Just like this.
Without warning, Ryan stood from the couch, causing doubt to settle into my chest. I wondered if I had done something wrong, but then his lust-filled eyes met mine. He held his arms out wide, gave a little wriggle of his hips, and wagged his brows when his pants fell to the floor, pooling around his ankles.
After rolling off the couch, I took his hand in mine and led him to the bedroom. The entire time he followed, he had to shuffle his feet, considering he hadn’t taken off his shoes, which prevented him from successfully stepping out of his pants.
Once we got to the bedroom, he didn’t waste any time with my clothes. In the sexiest maneuver I’d ever witnessed, he toed off his shoes while slipping my top over my head. And as he kicked off his pants, he slowly dragged mine down my legs. It might not have been a scene from a romance movie, but I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
My breath caught in my lungs when he climbed on top of me and pulled me close. His hand brushed my cheek and came to rest at my chin, grasping it gently. Then he firmly pressed his lips against mine. Tingles ran down my spine as his fingers slipped under the elastic of my panties at my hip and moved to cup my buttock, then squeezed.
When he pulled me against the hardness I had caused, a wave of heat radiated out from just below my stomach, proving that my body was just as ready as he was. He eased up on his grip and trailed his fingers up my back, over my shoulder, and under my bra strap until my bra fell away.
“That was pretty impressive. I can’t even take it off that quickly.”
He chuckled and then settled his body between my legs. The heat intensified as our chests pressed together. The electricity pulsed from my nipples—or maybe it was my heart beating so hard that it felt electric. Either way, the intensity was back with a vengeance as Ryan continued to explore my body.
He slowly moved his hips, causing his hardness to brush against me through my panties. And with every stroke of his heat against mine, a soft moan would escape my lips. I lifted my hips to meet his every thrust, as though I had done this exact thing before.
As if he couldn’t move fast enough, he sat back on his haunches and practically ripped my panties off. The elastic bit at my sides as he yanked them down, and then I had to pull my knees toward my chest to allow him to take them all the way off. With a smile on his face, he tossed them over his shoulder. And before they hit the floor, he was repositioned between my legs again, his mouth on mine.
When he trailed his lips to the side of my neck, I held onto the back of his head, encouraging him to return to my ear. That had been delicious. I whispered his name over and over again as my mind screamed for him to take me already. I wanted to be his. I wanted to feel all of him, so I tried to position my hips to help him find his way inside of me.
He pressed his forehead to mine and stilled for a moment, his harsh breaths warming my face. Worried that he would pull away and put an end to this before we even got started, I stared into his eyes and moved my hips to encourage him forward.
The pressure of him as he finally took advantage of my invitation caused my breathing to halt. I closed my eyes and tipped my head back, expecting it to hurt. But it didn’t. All I felt was an intense heat between my legs.
My breath caught as he slowly pushed his way into me. I put my hands on his shoulders and gently dug my fingernails into his flesh as he moved inside, going deeper with each push. My body began to relax, which made each thrust easier, until I finally felt every bit of him inside me. I had never felt so full. His girth completely stretched me—in a way that made me believe that we were genuinely made for each other.
He stilled for a minute, peppering my face with kisses. When he started to move again, my breathing became faster and harder. And as he nuzzled my neck, I ran my hands down his back and gripped his firm buttock, which made him tense.
Every time he tensed, I pulled him into me more, as if trying to force him deeper. His thrusts became more powerful as he gained momentum, his breathing matching mine in short pants. Every now and then, he grunted as he pushed into me, and that sound was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard.
Knowing that his reactions were because of me began to tip me over the edge. I pulled him into me and wrapped my legs around his waist, locking my ankles behind his back. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, and I heard myself cry out as a tsunami of intense pleasure crashed through me. Ryan pushed into me one last time before his body stiffened.
None of my life experiences had even come close to feeling as amazing as Ryan grinding into me, his body convulsing on top of me. He tensed one final time and then relaxed, releasing a long, full exhale. For a moment, he let his full weight press down on me. Then he lifted himself slightly and looked into my eyes, his brows knitted together.
“Are you okay?” I asked, not sure I wanted to hear his response.
“Yeah.” His face instantly relaxed, and a small grin toyed at the corners of his mouth. “This is going to sound strange, but it has never felt like that—so intense, so real, so right, so…perfect.” He shook his head and then rolled off me, taking me with him.
I could have happily spent the rest of my life with my head on his chest, his strong arm wrapped around me. “That doesn’t sound crazy. I mean, I don’t really have anything to compare it to, but to me, it felt like I had been waiting a thousand lifetimes for this exact moment. So if you’re crazy, then so am I.”
Nothing had ever felt more right than being in Ryan’s arms, our hearts racing, our skin glistening, and our legs tangled in the sheet that barely covered us. This wasn’t what I had anticipated happening when I decided to come to the chateau to see him. I thought we would talk and possibly—erm, hopefully—kiss some more, considering that wasn’t something we could do in front of Andrew or Patrick.
“That was very different than what I expected it would be like.” With my cheek against his chest, I wasn’t sure how muffled my words were—especially since my ears were still ringing. “In a good way, I mean.”
His chuckle reverberated through his chest and straight into my ear, filling me with excitement. “What were you expecting?”
“I don’t know…I guess I thought it would hurt more than it did.”
“Considering I was aware that it was your first time, I held back
a lot. I certainly didn’t want to hurt you.”
The memory of his body between my legs consumed me as I drew invisible circles on his chest with my fingertip. “Well, how about next time, you don’t hold back…as much.”
Ryan shifted against the mattress just enough to see my face. “Next time?”
I hesitated for a moment, not comprehending I’d even used those words, but as I thought about it, I realized that I did, in fact, want there to be a next time. And a time after that. And another time after that.
This conversation required more focus and attention than either of us could give in our current positions. We needed to be face-to-face, though I wasn’t willing to pull away from him. So I pushed up on my elbow, placed my hand on his bare chest, and met his stare. “In a perfect world, would you want this thing between us to continue beyond your stay on the island?”
My heart thudded loudly as I waited for his response.
Thank God it didn’t take him long to smile and say, “Hell yeah, I would.”
With a long, deep sigh of relief, I felt more confident carrying on with this conversation. It was something I had been thinking about, though I was unsure of the logistics—or even if he wanted the same things I did. “Okay, so what about in the non-perfect world that we currently live in? Would you still like it to continue?”
That was when he hesitated, which caused my stomach to tighten. “Well, yeah. Of course I would. But how? I can’t move here without giving up Amara, and you can’t come to me without giving up the crown. And neither of those is an option.”
As if I care about the crown.
He rolled his eyes, likely reading my mind. “You know what I mean, Moira. You would lose your family if you walked away from your…obligations. They’re all you have left.” He didn’t have to say it for me to understand that he had meant now that I didn’t have Daniel.