I looked around. The two chairs I’d gotten from Goodwill were also covered with academic debris. There was just enough space in my room to turn around and that was it, the bed or nothing. I swept a pile of books and papers up and deposited them behind the bed in a heap.
She sat down on the edge of the bed and folded one knee under her. Up close she was even more spellbinding. Her eyes were the deepest, brightest blue, like chips of blue ice.. She stared at me and I felt like a bug pinned to a specimen slide.
I tried to think of something to say but my mouth didn’t seem to be working right. I noticed Mark gave me a thumbs up, grinned and vanished.
“I’m kind of hurt.”
I stared at her, trying to figure out what she meant.
“You save a girl from a fate worse than death and then you completely abandon her. I figured you’d at least call me, but not a word. It’s been more than a week since you got out of the hospital. Do you go around saving so many damsels in distress that you lose track of them?”
She smiled as she said it and I couldn’t help smiling back.
“No, I generally don’t make a habit of it. But...”
“But....”
“I – uh...I don’t imagine you know anything about me, but I’m here on a partial scholarship and working and keeping up a full academic load. When...uh...when I went in the hospital I lost nearly a month. I’ve got finals coming up in a little more than a month and I can’t afford to fail any of them. I’ve been studying my ass off, plus going to classes. And...”
“And?”
She leaned forward, her breasts swaying gently inside her blouse. I could tell now she wasn’t wearing a bra because of the thimble sized nipples poking out at me. I had lost my train of thought.
“And?”
She was smiling gently and she followed my gaze down to her chest.
“And...I know you’ve got a very busy life. You...uh – have an active social life. I didn’t want to...uh...intrude.”
“Intrude?”
The smile faded.
I tried to make it sound casual, but I couldn’t keep a little emotion out.
“If you’d wanted to see me, to thank me, you would have come by the hospital. You never came by. I just assumed....that you weren’t interested in....bringing back any memories....of that night. I figured you probably just wanted to forget all about it. My mother told me about how you were hurt, and that you probably were embarrassed. So I just thought.”
“I never came by the hospital? That-“
Then she stopped herself. Her breasts heaved, which was a show all in itself.
She took a few deep breaths. Then:
‘I came by the hospital. Three times before I ran into your mother. She made it very plain that she didn’t want me anywhere around you. I managed to sneak into your room twice after that when she wasn’t around...just to sit with you.
“Then she walked in one day and found me there and gave the nurses orders to keep me out of there. She was family. They had to do it.
“When I heard you’d regained consciousness, they wouldn’t put any of my calls through to you.
I have a friend who’s an orderly and he told me when you’d been released. I just assumed...you would contact me. I was waiting. And when you never called, I said to hell with it and came over.”
I felt like shit for what I’d thought. And what I’d thought was that she was just a rich little slut girl who really didn’t give a shit about a nobody that had wound up in the hospital helping her.
“I’m sorry Debbie. I didn’t know. I – uh...look, my mother’s not a bad woman. She’s just protective. She – I – we lost my father when I was a little boy. She’s never remarried. I’ve been her whole life. I was an only child. And she thought you were-“
“A stupid, reckless slut that nearly got her son killed screwing around at a frat party.”
“Debbie, I-“
“You don’t need to deny it. That’s what she told me when she found me in your room the first time. Do you feel the same way?”
I just shook my head. “I can’t say anything about the way you live your life. You’re over 18.”
Her voice rose.
“You think I went there wanting to be raped. To have those assholes rape my ass until I was torn up inside? To tear my vaginal walls so I might not be able to have kids? To line up and rape me over and over? That son of a bitch I thought was my boyfriend got me drunk and drugged me.”
She lowered her voice.
“I like parties. I like guys. I like sex. Sue me. Show me that many coeds on this campus that don’t feel the same way. But I’m not a punchboard. I don’t go to bed with just anybody.”
Somehow, without knowing how it happened, I’d wound up holding her hands in mine. Her eyes glistened.
“That wasn’t what I was saying. I’m just saying that I can’t pass judgment on how you live your life. If I’d thought you...wanted to be there...wanted what was happening, I wouldn’t have stepped in. But I didn’t think you wanted it. And I was right. I’m glad I stepped in. I always will be. It was the right thing to do.”
“Do you always do the right thing?”
“I try to.”
She was close enough to me that I could smell the dizzying scent of her. It wasn’t perfume. It was her. Another few inches and those hard nipples would be grazing my t-shirt. I had never wanted anything more in my life than to lean forward and kiss those red lips. But I couldn’t.
She was grateful to me for saving her but, if I leaned forward and took that kiss, I knew she’d stiffen and draw back and give me a look I didn’t want to have to live with. She had come here to thank me, but she was still light years out of my league.
She licked her lips and I thought I was going to die, or cum in my pants. Whatever, one of those things. Then she pulled back and looked around my little room designed in late 20th century poverty.
“You save me and sink yourself Bill. That doesn’t seem fair.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it isn’t. You shouldn’t be punished for coming to my rescue.”
She picked up the sociology book, looked it over and said, “You’ve got Williamson?”
“Yeah.”
“I took his class last semester. I got an A. I can tutor you on what you’ve missed and I guarantee you an A on the final. What else are you taking?”
I told her.
“I haven’t taken the math yet, but I’m pretty good at math. I have taken the econ and while I haven’t taken your lit class, I always ace English. Let me help you on these and you can probably pass everything without killing yourself. Two heads are better than one you know.”
“I can’t ask you to do that, Debbie. You’ve got your own classes to worry about.”
“I’m ahead on everything right now. And...my econ 2 class is the hardest one I’ve got. Jerry Harvey has been trying to get me to go to bed with him since I started his class. If I rub my titties on him a little bit, he’ll do my assignments himself.”
I couldn’t help smiling at her, although I didn’t like the mental image of her rubbing those big breasts up against an old man.
“And there are whole armies of frat boys who’ll do the work in my other classes if I just ask them to, ever so sweetly.”
“You make it sound so easy.”
She grinned at me again.
“You think I’m just a pretty face and a pair of DD cups? There’s a brain inside here, Bill Maitland.”
“Yeah, I’m beginning to see that.”
“But in the meantime,” she said, standing up suddenly and holding her hand out to me, “let me take you to dinner.”
I didn’t grab her hand.
“I can’t, Debbie. I have too much-“
“Bullshit. Give me your hand. There.”
She pulled me up and for the first time I realized how tall she was. She wasn’t wearing heels but I still had to look up slightly. Not a lot, but it was strange looking up into h
er eyes. It didn’t do anything for my self-confidence.
“Come with me. You have to eat something so let me treat you to a steak at Merriweather’s and when we come back I’ll help you study. I don’t have a curfew and I’ll stay as late as you want me to.”
Merriweather’s was the best steak place in Gainesville and I couldn’t afford to even think of going there.
“I don’t want you to spend that kind of money...”
“It won’t cost us anything. I dated the son of Ritchie Merriweather, the owner, last Fall. It’s too bad he’s married because I liked him better than I did his son, but he loves me and he’ll feed both of us for free.”
She looked at me as if seeing me for the first time, taking in the faded jeans and holed tee-shirt.
“You got decent clothes? Maybe a jacket?”
“Decent clothes but no jacket.”
“Doesn’t matter. He keeps jackets and ties for special guests. Come on, get dressed. You want me to turn around, in case you don’t have on underwear under those jeans?”
She grinned at me.
“If you want me not to, I won’t turn around.”
I thought about arguing with her for a second, then realized she’d get me out of there if she had to throw me over her shoulder and carry me out. I had run into a stacked steamroller.
The only problem was, I was already falling in love with an angel and I was never going to be able to fly high enough to win her.
Tuesday, July 12, 2005 – 3 P.M.
The knocking started and I ignored it. Only a couple of people had dared to knock so far. I wondered who was trying their luck this time until I heard a familiar voice.
“Bill, open up. Come on. If I have to, I’ll bring somebody in to take the door off.”
He would probably do it, too. Oh well, time to face the music. I got up, unlocked the door and went back to my desk. I leaned back and waited.
“Why didn’t you just go home? You’d have gotten away from this place and not caused such a stir. I’ve had to seal this place up like a mutant virus got loose to avoid news stories about ‘Top State Attorney Having Break-Down.’ And that’s not just for your benefit. I’d hate to have you prosecuting cases and have every single defense attorney trying to have you tossed off the case because of your mental problems.”
“Mental problems?”
“For you, these are mental problems. The Iceman doesn’t lock himself in his office and close off the world.”
“I’m just having a bad day, Boss. Everybody’s entitled to one of those every decade or so. And as to why I didn’t go home. You forget. I don’t have one of those anymore. This is as close as anything comes.”
He leaned back against the doorway. Sometimes I forget just how big he is. He nearly filled the doorway. He’d been lean and mean in his basketball days. Today, nearly 40 years later, he was just big.
“I wanted to talk to you about that. I called Teller earlier. I heard you went to see him on your own. Did it have anything to do with this?”
Shit. I had trusted Teller.
After that many years he could read my mind.
“He didn’t say anything. But you forget, there are eyes everywhere.”
“No. It was personal. Mostly.”
“I want you to come upstairs before you leave. Myra will have some paperwork and documents for you. She’ll explain everything.”
“About what?”
“You’ll be shipping out of here Friday morning. On the ‘Bonne Chance.’ It’s a cruise ship that’s primarily staffed by the French and it has a fair number of French guests, but like all of them, they have everybody from around the world on it. Holds about 1500 guests. So it’s fairly small, but it’s top of the line, very expensive. They docked here yesterday and will sail out Friday. They only get by here every few years.”
“A cruise? Friday? Look, you must really think I’m cracking up to be spending that kind of money on me, but-“
“No buts. The booking has been made. I’m spending a hell of a lot of money on you for one week. I’m hiding the expenses so I can explain to state auditors that I’m not lavishing luxury on an important staff member who’s going through a bad divorce to keep him from cracking up. But that’s the deal. Just go and enjoy.”
I shook my head. The whole idea was crazier than Edwards thought I was. I hadn’t been on a cruise in nearly ten years. There never seemed to be the time and there was always a case.
“No, Boss. Thank you. But the whole idea’s crazy. Trials don’t stop just because I’m having problems. And what kind of damned cruise would I have by myself – worried about the job and not being able to get – get my personal life off my mind.”
“It wasn’t a request and it wasn’t optional. I’ve booked the cruise, you are going, and that’s it.”
I looked at him in disbelief.
“You know I like you, but I’m not going on any damned cruise just because you get it in your head that I need one.”
He just looked at me and a little of the nice guy persona of the career politician slipped and there was a hard glint in his eyes.
“Bill, you are as good a man and as good a prosecutor as I’ve ever known. And I’ve been doing this for a long time. You’re a critical cog in the working of this office. You’re tough minded and you’re dedicated. But you’re not made out of iron. I don’t know what, but something about the Bingham case got to you. It got through that armor of yours. It was probably a Perfect Storm of your personal life and the Bingham case.
“Regardless, it’s damaged you, thrown you off. I’m not sure you’re going to be able to get back. You won’t seek professional help. I know you were only with Teller for a few minutes and that’s not long enough to do anything. So I’m just trying to get you away from all the crap in your life for a little while. Give yourself a little space.”
“I appreciate this, Boss, I really do, but just going away for a week-“
“It’s not a request. It’s an order. Much as I appreciate you, if you’re not on that ship when it sails on Friday don’t bother coming back to work Monday. I’m going to miss the hell out of you, but you’re a disaster waiting to happen if you don’t get your head back on straight. Not only will I fire you, but I’ll do my best to make sure you don’t land a job like this anywhere else. I’ve been in this life a long time and I know people all over. “
“You’d do that to me. After ten years?”
“Trust me. When you get ready to board the ship I’m going to have an Assistant waiting and they’re going to check your luggage to make sure you’re not carrying any documents relating to any cases with you. You’ll have email and Internet capability on the ship and you can take your laptop with you, but you’ll be barred from any access to or communication with anybody in this office.
“I don’t want you doing anything related to this office. I don’t want you thinking about cases. I don’t want you talking to anybody about cases. If we have a crisis come up, we’ll just have to handle it without you.”
“You’re really serious about this?”
“Yes. Bill, I don’t care what you do on this cruise. Eat some good French food. Drink some good booze and get drunk. Walk the decks and look at the stars. Pick up a lady or two and get laid. Think about things and get things sorted out. Just forget about this office.”
He turned to leave.
“You know, Dallas, I do appreciate this. I know you mean well. But it’s not going to do any good. The problems I’ve got – a week at sea isn’t going to solve them.”
He looked back at me and smiled.
“Who knows? It won’t hurt to cut loose for once. You’ve been so dedicated to this office, to other people’s problems, for so long, you’ve turned into an old man. I think in your head, you’re 70. Just...have some fun. And let yourself be surprised.”
CHAPTER 8: NICE GUY – WE ALL KNOW HOW THAT STORY ENDS
Wednesday, July 13, 2005 – 9 A.M.
My name is William Maitland.
I’m an Assistant State Attorney in Jacksonville, Florida. Until three months ago I had a job I loved and a wife I loved who I thought loved me. Now, the marriage is on track to end up in the trash that 50 percent of American marriages eventually inhabit and I am desperately trying to keep at least my professional life on track. I hit a bump yesterday when I to all intents and purposes drove an old man who had killed his wife to suicide.
For a lot of reasons it hit me hard. I had a breakdown, of sorts. Call it a mini-breakdown. It was a one-day meltdown on Tuesday. But that’s all the time life would allow me so I had to enjoy what I could get. But now, before my day for my breakdown was officially over, I was back on the job.
I was reviewing cases coming up over the next few weeks. The Big Man had left me the rest of the day and today – Wednesday - to wrap up preparation. Thursday I was supposed to come in for a few hours and then make myself scarce for the rest of the day getting ready for an involuntary sea cruise.
I had been thinking about dropping the whole prosecution thing that had been my life for 10 years, but when it was suddenly yanked away from me, I found that I didn’t want to let go that abruptly.
I know, I know, I was one of nearly 30 attorneys in the office and some of them had a lot more experience than I did, but the habits of the last five years didn’t die easy. I still felt responsible for handling those cases right.
There were too many people whose lives would be affected if I screwed up, or the attorneys handling the cases screwed up. I couldn’t be here for the next week or so, I but I could leave things in good order.
Wednesday, July 13, 2005 – NOON
Debbie opened the door and knew immediately that something was wrong. She heard the television in the den going and she knew she had turned it off before she left. She turned to walk back away quickly and call the police, but realized there was a more likely possibility than burglars.
“Kelly? BJ? Are you here? Answer me.”
After a minute there was a ‘Hey, mom. What are you doing home?”
Bill Jr. stepped into sight with a sheepish grin on his face. He was dressed in shorts and a muscle shirt. And he was not at Peterson Academies of Technology on Jacksonville’s Westside taking a summer college prep English enrichment class she had paid good money to get him into, English being far from his best subject.
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