“I told you I have to go,” she fired back.
“Shit. Come here.” He tugged her closer, forcing himself to ignore how tense she was. He stared down at her. “I’m sorry if I pushed, okay?” He forced a careless grin when that was the last thing he felt. “I’ll butt out.”
She nodded and relaxed a fraction. “There’s nothing to worry about, Joe. I promise.”
The woman was lying through her teeth. She couldn’t hide a damn thing.
“Can we just… have fun and put all this serious stuff behind us? Just for one more night?”
There was an almost desperate note to her voice.
“One more night?” A cold lump formed in his gut, like he’d just chowed down on a lead sandwich.
She chuckled, but the sound was forced. “I just meant, when you come by tonight…”
“So you still want me to come over later?”
Her face softened and she moved closer, sliding her hands around his waist. “Yes,” she whispered. “Of course I do.”
She dropped her forehead to his chest, nuzzled against him, then lifted her beautiful face so he could see her.
“Who else makes me laugh so hard my sides hurt? You keep my mind of the shitty state of my life. I need you, Joe.”
Fuck. Yeah, shit. That hurt. A lot. Kinda felt like she’d plunged a knife through his heart.
“Like your own personal clown, huh?”
She chuckled. “You know it.”
How could she not know how those words would affect him? He’d told her how things were for him when he was a kid—why he’d become the joker and how he wanted to be seen as more—and she’d thrown it back in his face without a second thought.
She went up on her toes, silently asking him to kiss her, and he stared down at her, wondering if he’d ever known her at all.
Darcey would never return his feelings.
The realization hit hard and fast, like she’d catapulted all his fears and insecurities at him at once and they’d hit every vital organ, slicing deep. He felt like he was bleeding out in front of her, and she didn’t even have a clue.
When he didn’t immediately lean in, the smile slipped. “Joe?”
Maybe he was a glutton for punishment, or maybe he was just the idiot his father and brother had always thought he was, but he couldn’t pull away from her, couldn’t deny her anything, not even a kiss.
“Oh God…” She paled, fingers flexing against his back. “I didn’t mean…I shouldn’t have said…”
Sliding his hands into her hair, he leaned in, shutting down her apology with a kiss before it left her mouth. He didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want her pity. This was all she was willing to give him—nothing deeper, nothing meaningful—and he had to accept that or lose her completely.
He couldn’t do that, not yet.
He kissed her hard, then rested his forehead against hers. “I’ll see you later.”
Then he stepped back, putting distance between them, and walked away.
Chapter Twenty
Darcey tightened the P-trap connections back up, removed the bucket, then scooted out from under the kitchen sink. Turning to the frazzled-looking woman standing behind her, she smiled. “Got it.”
The woman sagged in relief when Darcey handed her back her platinum and diamond engagement ring.
“Maybe don’t leave it by the sink when you do the dishes next time, okay?”
The woman shook her head. “God, no. Never again. I think I lost ten years off my life when it went down there. Thank you so much.”
“No worries.”
Darcey gathered her tools and headed to her car. After she loaded up, she climbed in and sent Jacob a quick text to tell him she was all done for the day and would catch him tomorrow.
The drive back to her apartment seemed to take forever. After wallowing in people’s shit and under their sinks, sifting through the revolting crap lurking in their pipes most of the day, she wanted a long, hot shower and a mountain of food—in that order.
Would Joe come to her place tonight?
Yeah, he’d stayed with her the night before, even after the way she’d shoved her foot in her mouth, implying she only wanted him around to provide her with entertainment—like he was nothing more than a distraction to take her mind of her problems.
God, the way she’d lashed out at him in the diner. Just thinking about it made her cringe. But while they’d sat there, that ticking time bomb had been hovering over their heads, counting down the time she had left with him—to what lay ahead for her—and it had become too much.
But then he’d been gone when she woke the next morning. He hadn’t even said good-bye.
She wished she could take it back. The words had just popped out of her mouth before she could stop them. She’d been so desperate to steer him away from questioning her farther. To keep things light, to not ruin the time they had left. She damn well knew it bothered him when the people closest to him saw him that way.
A clown. A joker.
When he’d let himself in late last night, she’d been relieved. She’d wanted to say sorry—had planned to say it as soon as she saw him—but he hadn’t given her the chance. His mouth had come down on hers as soon as she’d forced her heavy eyes open. There’d been an intensity in the way he’d been with her—a determination she’d never felt from him before. He’d destroyed her inside and out until she’d been nothing but a sweaty, shaking mess.
Then she’d passed the hell out and woken alone.
He was still angry with her. Of course he was. She’d behaved like an insensitive cow.
She should be relieved. She had to end it anyway. But how could she be relieved when the idea of never seeing him again caused a physical ache?
She was only a few blocks from her place when her phone rang. “Yeah?”
“It’s me.”
Len.
She gritted her teeth against the cold sliver of dread that slithered down her spine. “What do you want? I still have another day.”
“Get your ass over to the house. Now.”
“What…”
“Now, Darcey.” Then he hung up.
Nausea fired through her belly. There was no way she could turn him down. He also sounded furious, which was never a good thing. Len did crazy shit when he was angry. And going by his voice, this was one of those times.
Noah.
Quickly turning the car around, she headed over there as fast as she could, her heart in her throat.
When she pulled up, the first thing she noticed was Edith’s car parked outside, trunk and back doors open, overflowing with stuff.
Had he kicked her out? What the fuck was going on?
Climbing out of her car, she jogged to the front door and beat the shit out of it. There was yelling coming from inside—Len’s booming voice and Edith’s shrieks.
Darcey tested the door. Not locked. She pushed it open and entered a war zone. There were clothes and crap strewn all over the floor. Edith stood in the middle of the foyer, mascara running down her face, her hair wild and lipstick smeared. She spun around when Darcey walked in, her expression immediately twisting into something ugly.
“Already here to pick over my bones, you fucking whore?” she screamed.
Oh shit. What had Len, the stupid fuck, gone and said?
Len grabbed his wife’s arm and dragged her to the front door. “Get your shit and get the fuck out of my house, you stupid bitch.”
“You’ll regret this. You’ll be sorry you did this to me. You need me, Lenny. She just turned your head, that’s all. You’ll get sick of her and want me back. I know you will.”
She clung to his arm, pleading with the revolting son of a bitch. Len wasn’t moved. Ignoring her completely, he opened the door and shoved her out, slamming it in her face.
This wasn’t happening.
Darcey may not have had any love for Edith, but at least the woman had made sure Noah was fed and clothed. Len couldn’t even look after himself, l
et alone her eight-year-old brother.
He spun on her.
Shit, the guy looked terrifying as hell.
Darcey shuffled in place, ready to fight him off. “You told her?”
“She worked it out for herself.”
“How the hell could she do that?”
His gaze swept her from head to toe, making her skin crawl. “You really wanna know the answer to that?” His lips curled in a smirk.
No. She didn’t. Whatever the sick fuck had done to tip Edith off, she wanted to remain ignorant. “What the hell’s going on, Len? Where’s Noah? He’s probably freaking out right now. Let me see him.”
Len’s jaw hardened, his creepy pale eyes boring into her. “Yesterday, while Edith was out spending my fucking money, she saw something she couldn’t wait to rush back and tell me about. You wanna know what that was, Darcey?”
No. She shrugged.
He snarled.
“You were never going to agree to be with me, were you? You were going to keep on stringing me along.”
“Stringing you along? I’ve never wanted what you… want from me. You were blackmailing me into sleeping with you. I’ve never done anything to make you think I want that, and you damn well know it.”
His gaze was wild, kind of crazy. “You weren’t taking my threat seriously.” He lifted a shoulder, let it drop. “I’ve made it so now you will.”
He hadn’t heard a word she’d said. The asshole had completely lost his mind. “Tell me where Noah is, Len. Now.”
“Child Welfare picked him up yesterday afternoon.” He took a step toward her, looking smug as fuck. “He was placed in a temporary home last night, until they find a someone who will take him.”
Darcey stumbled back. “No.” She shook her head. “No, you can’t just… I don’t believe you.”
“Voluntary placement. You ever heard of that?”
She shook her head again, couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe. She was suffocating, her head spinning, close to throwing up.
“I couldn’t cope. You know—with my new wife leaving me because I still hadn’t gotten over Rose’s death. I was too cut up to raise her troubled son,” Len crooned. “What else could I do? His only other family is an out of control sister who lives in a dump and has a police record. She could never be trusted to look after her brother.”
Darcey was shaking now, so hard she could barely hold herself upright. “Why are you doing this?”
His lip curled. “You know why.”
“I don’t…”
“You’re fucking someone else! Edith saw you together. Some guy had his hands all over you. This is your fault. Your brother is gone because of you.”
Edith had seen her with Joe outside the diner. Oh God. “What do you want, Len?”
“Just say the word, and I’ll get him back. Break it off with this guy and be with me. We’ll only have to deal with Child Welfare for a few months. They’ll see we’re a stable family unit when you come home, and we’ll get him back.”
He closed the gap between them and grabbed her biceps, slamming her against the wall.
“Let me go,” she rasped.
“No.” He licked his lips and shook his head. “Say you’ll move in, that we can be a family again, Rose, and I’ll get him back.”
Rose?
“I’m not, Rose.”
He stilled. “I know you’re not.”
“You called me Rose. But I’m not her, Len. I’m not my mother.”
He growled. “What the fuck are you talking about? That’s not… I’m not…”
“This would break her heart—what you’re doing to her children, to her little boy…”
His eyes flashed. “Shut up.”
“She’d hate this, what you’ve become…”
“I said shut up!”
His hand connected with the side of her face, the blow jarring her entire body. The tinny taste of blood filled her mouth as she shoved away, backing toward the door.
“If you leave, you’ll lose Noah for good.”
She pressed a hand to her throbbing cheek. “You fucked up, Len.” She curled her fingers into a tight fist so he wouldn’t see how her hand shook. “They’re not going to give him back to you now, not after you gave him up. I’m his blood, his sister, and you? You’re nothing, to either of us.”
“Darcey…”
She hit the wall beside the door. “I want you to stay the hell away from us.”
Then she ran out the door, climbed into her car, and got out of there.
She needed to find Noah. She had to get him back.
No matter what it took.
~ * ~
Even though Darcey was expecting it, the knock at the door made her jump.
Turning from the window she’d been staring out for the last twenty minutes, she straightened her pencil skirt. Then, running shaking fingers down the front of her shirt, she headed for the door. God, her belly was in knots.
She took one last look around her apartment. She’d cleaned and scrubbed the crap out of it. The place looked immaculate.
You’re not fooling anyone. Least of all the woman waiting on the other side of her door.
Cleaning and tidying didn’t change the fact her one-room apartment was a dump, in a shitty part of the city.
You can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear.
One of Jacob’s favorite sayings described her current situation perfectly.
Blowing out a nervous breath, she opened the door, a smile plastered on her face. It no doubt looked as false as it felt.
“Hi. Nice to see you again.”
The other woman smiled back and walked in. This was their third meeting. After she’d left Len’s, she’d gone to find out where her brother was, and after being told to make an appointment and come back with the relevant identification, she’d been forced to leave. It had killed her to do it. And as hard as it was, she hadn’t made a scene, knowing that would only hurt her case, and did what they asked.
Alice Morgan was Noah’s case officer, and she actually seemed pretty great. She’d also arranged for Darcey to have a visit with Noah, which couldn’t come fast enough.
Today, though, was one of the most important visits they’d had so far. Alice was here, in Darcey’s tiny apartment, to inspect the place and discuss what they needed from her if she wanted Noah to live with her.
Darcey watched nervously as the other woman look around. It didn’t take long.
“It’s one room?”
“Yes.” Her stomach sank. “But I’m looking for something else. This would only be temporary.” Yeah, she was looking, but nothing was in her price range. She needed a second job.
“How long have you lived here, Darcey?”
She felt nauseous. “A few months.”
“Okay.” She scribbled something down on her pad. “Shall we take a seat? We can go over a few things and go from there, okay?”
“Of course. Sorry. Please, take a seat.” God, she sucked at this stuff. “Do you want a drink or something?”
The other woman shook her head. “I’m fine.”
They sat and Darcey watched as Alice pulled a file from her bag, shuffling through some papers.
“You come across as a straightforward person, so I’m not going to beat around the bush.” Alice’s eyes were kind, but the woman was all business. “I’ve talked to your brother several times. He wants to be with you, Darcey, very much. We take the child's wishes into consideration along with what we feel would be best for him or her.” A small frown creased her brow. “I’ve met your stepfather… I shouldn’t say this, but I have to agree with Noah. I’d really like to have the pair of you reunited.”
Darcey’s heart started to thud like a jackrabbit’s in her chest. When she’d met this woman, she’d known she was no pushover, and she’d hoped like hell she’d see right through Len. In her position, she couldn’t play favorites, but she just kinda had.
“He can come to me?”
“We
need you to ace this assessment first, Darcey, and right now, you’re not. Your income isn’t where I’d like it to be. You also need a bigger apartment.” That kind smile was aimed at her again. “And you need to apply to have your criminal record made exempt.”
“Okay.” Darcey’s head was spinning. “How… I don’t know…”
“You were young, it wasn’t a violent crime, and you’ve had no convictions since. It should be fairly easy. I know it seems like a lot, but you can do this. I’ll help you with the exemption, so all you need to focus on is your finances and getting a better place, okay?”
“Sounds good.”
Darcey thought she might actually break down. How the hell was she going to find a better place? She couldn’t just pull money out of her ass. She had no qualifications, no skills apart from working elbows-deep in crap.
Alice stayed for a while longer, walking her through the forms needed so she could apply for her exemption, going as far as helping her fill them out. It made her sick, that the thing she thought was her biggest roadblock to getting Noah seemed so simple and straightforward. All this time, instead of being under the Ramirez brothers’ thumbs, she should have been working her ass off, making money and setting herself up in a better place.
God, she’d screwed up, and now Noah was paying for it.
Alice finally left and Darcey leaned heavily against the door.
What the hell am I going to do?
She slid to the floor, arms wrapped around her knees. Somehow, she had to figure out a way.
Get it together, Darcey.
There was no time to feel sorry for herself. She had to pull it together, come up with a plan of attack. Noah needed her to be strong.
Picking herself up off the floor, she went to get changed.
Her phone beeped, alerting her to a text.
Joe: Got some business tonight. See u after?
Business meant he’d be out boosting cars for Len, since that fucker was now in charge of the Ramirez family.
Staring at the phone, she slumped down onto her bed.
Their time was up. She’d already let things between them go on longer than she should have. She couldn’t be with a man who could possibly get caught for grand theft auto, and she couldn't risk Len finding out it was Joe she was seeing, not when Noah’s future was still hanging in the balance.
Spin (Boosted Hearts Book 2) Page 20