Reluctant Surrender

by Riley Murphy

  “No particularly, but I’m thinking you’re going to tell me anyway.”

  “I took the kale.”

  “Is that some kind of an oath?”

  “Nope.” She snapped her head right then left. “It’s a vebigeetable.”

  Jo leaned forward and plucked up the section of hair that had fallen over Colin’s eyes. “A vegetable? Are you okay? Maybe I should call Doc, she’s home now.”

  “Nope.” She slammed the bottle down on the table and fell over sideways in a sprawl. “He did something else with a vegetable too. Something wicked.” She narrowed her eyes. “He’s no Steven Hawkins, he’s an evil genius.”

  “What? Did he throw tomatoes at you before he kicked you out?”

  “Nope.” She yawned and closed her eyes. “This was when he was spanking me.”

  “Spanking you? Geez, Colin, don’t pass out on me now. We’re just getting to the good stuff.”

  Colin snorted. “Good stuff? There is no good stuff. Not anymore. Jade’s eating his kale now.” She pushed her face into the couch cushion and groaned.

  “Collie?”

  “What?” Everything was spinning when she flopped over and opened her eyes. She had to focus really hard on the decorative tin ceiling tiles to keep them from roving around. Even while she lamented at the thought that she was in for a big headache tomorrow. Tomorrow? Ick. This would be the second hangover in less than two weeks, all because of him. The rat bastard! She thought about the night on the dock and groaned again.

  “What the hell is with the kale?”

  “I used to hate it and now?” She tilted her head up and when she spied Jo, her friend had three dancing faces. She latched on to one of them and followed it. “Now I’m freaking out because when my stash is gone, I don’t even know where I’ll be able to buy it. I don’t think my supermarket carries the flat-leaf variety.”

  “Who gives a shit about the lettuce? Did he really spank you?”

  If she was dizzy before, now she was punch-drunk. She giggled when that occurred to her.

  Suddenly Jo was beside her. Trying to get her attention.

  “Quit smacking me.” She swatted at her friend’s persistent hand. All she wanted to do was close her eyes and rest a moment.

  “Not until you tell me. Forget the spanking then, what did he do with the kale?”

  “He made me eat it.”

  “Well, duh! What else would you do with it?”

  “He’d figure something out. He’s pretty creative when it comes to ginger root. I fink I need more wine.”

  “Oh no you don’t.” Jo pushed the bottle out of her reach. “So, what did he do with the ginger root?”

  “Gah! I’m not telling.”

  “No? Here, have some more wine.”

  “N-no. I’m too tired.” She lay back, intent upon sleeping. She closed her eyes and—

  Freaking hell there was an earthquake. The whole room was shaking.

  “Collie, wake up.”

  “Whaaat?” She opened one eye and saw Jo leaning over her. At least she thought it was Jo. Coulda been a Picasso painting with Jo’s coloring, but seeing as how she didn’t have million-dollar artwork floating around her house, Jo was a safe bet. She squinted and tried put some distance between them with no success. “Pffshaw.” That came out so sloppy she smacked a hand against what she figured was Jo’s cheek and said dead serious, “Sorry I didn’t mean to spit on you.”

  “Move over.”

  “What? Why?”

  “I’m sticking around until you’re in better shape. Maybe then you’ll tell me about the vegetables and the spanking.”

  When Jo took the other end of the couch, Colin closed her eyes and clap, clapped.

  “Colin, what are you doing?”

  “Turning off the light.”

  “You actually have one of those things?”

  Colin snuggled against the cushions with a sigh, but didn’t open her eyes. “Did it go out?”

  “No.”

  “Ummm, nope. I guess I don’t. You’re going to have to shut it off.” She was quiet for a full minute. She didn’t want to say what was on her mind, but her mind was racing, spinning and tumbling and it was hard to derail the freight train that steamrolled ahead. “I thought he liked me. I thought he really, truly liked me.” The spinning got worse and then her stomach lurched—once, twice—she sat up. “Uh-oh, I think I’m going to be sick.”

  Halfway to the bathroom, she stumbled and bounced off the hall wall. “Crapatola!”

  “Don’t worry I'm right behind you.”

  Jo managed to grab hold of her just in time and pushed her forward. Thankfully she made it to the bathroom and was nearly finished gagging into the toilet five minutes later when she heard her friend muse, “Go figure. For years I hated that bun and now? I’m definitely missing it.”

  “You can let go. I think I’m finished.” When Jo let go of her hair Colin pressed her forehead against the cool tank and whispered, “Let go…he promised me he wouldn’t let go.”

  “Were you dressed at the time?”

  “No.”

  “Then it doesn’t count.”

  She was too exhausted to argue. “Jo, I think my heart is broken.”

  “You’ll get over it.”

  “I—” The tears started again. Only this time they were quiet, huge and steady. Welling from the deepest, saddest part of her. “I don’t think I will, Jo. I don’t think…”

  Jo hugged her hard and swore. “That prick. I’m going to fucking kill him.”

  * * * * *

  Ethan sat in his office and listened to Ted and David going over the final grand opening plans. He tried to remain focused, but his thoughts kept straying to the left side of his desk. To the empty expanse of floor which made him think of Colin. Hell, everything made him think of Colin. Food, furniture, flooring, there was no escaping her ghost-like presence because the truth was he carried those images of her inside. They were like frozen snapshots in his mind. The worst one? The picture of her as he’d last seen her. Was it really less than a week ago? Christ it seemed a lifetime ago.

  “E?”

  He turned to David and asked, “Did I tell you I want to be first up for the evening?”

  “Yes, this would make it the fourth time you mentioned it.”

  “Have you thought about talking to Colin about it? Maybe—”

  Ethan held up a hand. “Thanks Ted, but you know why I can’t do that.” He looked between his two scowling buddies and attempted a half-assed smile. “Why all of a sudden are you pushing for her? This was a job, remember? She got paid and we got our great review.” He thought about her last posting the day before she left because she hadn’t posted anything since, and scowled. Recalling how her heart had been left on the page made his gut lurch. “Actually,” his voice went low, “we got better than we hoped for.”

  “She made you happy.”

  David’s statement cut through the heavy tension in the room like a hot knife through marmalade and with both his friends staring Ethan puffed out a huge breath. “Yes, I admit it, she did, but it wouldn’t have worked out between us even without Jade arriving to preempt an inevitable breakup. Colin isn’t suited for our kind of lifestyle.”

  “It looked like it suited her when she was kneeling by your side half-naked.”

  “You attended?”

  Ethan glared at Ted and then turned his attention to David. “She needed to be drawn out of her shell so T gave me a hand. But this isn’t the point. She doesn’t belong rubbing shoulders with a person like Jade.”

  “Look.” David leaned forward and put the checklist he’d been holding on Ethan’s desk. “Jade hasn’t been right since she had her breakdown. You know it and we do too. You tried to do the right thing for her, we get it. But now it’s time for you to do the right thing for yourself. Tell Colin about Jade. If you do I’m sure she’ll forgive you for the mess you’ve already made of things and you can probably work something out with her because, quite f
rankly, Ted and I have had enough of watching you sulk.”

  “True. You have been a bear the last few days.”

  Ethan scowled.

  “See? Point proven.” Ted scowled right back. “Don’t you think we all know a woman like Jade is not indicative of the lifestyle?” Ted asked. “But you, you talk about letting go of Colin like she’s clean to your dirt.”

  Ethan sat back and thought about this. Although this was partly true there was a greater reason overshadowing his decision and it seemed his friends weren’t going to leave him in peace until he told them what that reason was.

  “Colin’s strongest fear is public humiliation. After what her ex-fiancé did to her in front of a crowd of people she respected on her wedding day, who could blame her?” He came forward, gathering up the checklist sheets. “I want you to follow my logic with this. Colin might be okay with being outed as Riling Rita, but if I don’t give Jade what she wants Jade’s going to go to the papers and trash my reputation, while highlighting me to be a pervert. Not that I’d give a shit, but if she also outs Colin at the same time, Colin’s nearly ten days spent with perverted me would have a far-reaching effect if she hoped to get the winery up and running. Not to mention her biggest fear would haunt her for the rest of her life because she hasn’t faced it yet.”

  Ted whistled and David swore. “Fuck, E, I’m sorry Jade’s got her hooks into you like this. Maybe once she gets what she wants you’ll be free to pursue— What?”

  Ethan slowly shook his head. “Don’t you get it? I can’t foist Jade on some unsuspecting Dom. It wouldn’t be right.”

  “You’re not going to take up with her again.” David looked at Ted and demanded, “Say something. Tell him we can’t let that happen.”

  Ethan didn’t wait for Ted to speak because it would have been pointless. “I have no choice. If I can’t continue to blackball her I’ll have to keep her close until I can get her to return to her senses and go back into therapy.”

  “Fuck.”

  Ted looked at David and agreed. “You can say that again, bro.”

  * * * * *

  “Are those Jackie Onassis sunglasses glued to your head or something? You haven’t taken them off for a week.”

  Colin grunted. She was sure Jo was screaming at her. “Keep it down, would ya? I’ve got a headache.”

  “If I talk any quieter you won’t hear me and if you’d stopped crying your head off it wouldn’t be aching. What’s that?”

  Colin sat up and let the damp dishtowel she’d draped over her forehead fall to her lap. “A sliced-up banana with an egg-white omelet on the side.”

  “Gross. And the green stuff? Kale juice?”

  “Gatorade.”

  “Okay, forget I asked.”

  Even though Colin hadn’t had a drink since her binge nearly a week ago she felt as if she were in a state of perpetual hangover. The cause led her to his cure. She figured maybe if she treated her fuzzy and stuffy head from crying to a little of Ethan’s potassium and protein fix it wouldn’t hurt.

  “Hello?”

  Jo swept up the morning paper from the coffee table and shouted, “We’re in here, Doc.”

  “Oh God, my head. Jo!”

  “Sorry.”

  “Hey guys. Where’s Twinkles? She usually greets me at the door.”

  Colin took note of Lacy’s new haircut. It was a short, blunt cut that suited the clean angles of her face. “You look great, Doc. Your trip must have agreed with you. Twinkles is still at Jo’s. Casper’s there too. It’s a long story.”

  Lacy walked over and took a seat on the arm of the couch. She grabbed up a piece of banana and popped it into her mouth. Around her chewing she asked, “The long story about you screwing the Dom and him fucking you over with his sub?”

  Colin turned and glared at Jo, but then realized she probably couldn’t see her behind the shades. “Someone’s got a big mouth.”

  “Hey, it saves on us doing a recap.”

  Colin turned and scrunched her nose. “Did big mouth also tell you that I lost the bid for Wakefield?”

  “Yes.”

  Colin made room for her friend as Lacy slid into the space beside her on the couch. “Sorry about that, chica. I know how much you wanted it.”

  “I’ll live.”

  “Like this?” Jo snorted. “This,” she waved a hand in a figure eight motion in front of Colin’s face, “isn’t living.”

  “It’s only been a week, cut me some slack, would ya?”

  “I take it this heart aching isn’t all about Wakefield?”

  “No it’s not.” Colin leaned back and gauged both her friends were looking at her. “We’ll talk about that later. At the moment I’d rather talk about why I called you guys here. I had the most interesting conversation yesterday and it’s given me an idea. An idea that makes me want to rest and conserve my strength.”

  “Strength for?” Jo asked.

  “A party tomorrow night.”

  “You’re going to a party? Are we invited?” This time it was Doc who asked.

  Colin smiled. “Oh yeah. I wouldn’t go without my girls.”

  “Colin?” Jo had that I can hardly wait tone of voice. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

  Colin’s smile widened and she turned her head in the direction of Jo’s voice. “Well, if you’re thinking we’re going to crash Ethan’s grand opening and kick Jade’s ass then that would be a yes.”

  Lacy let out a deep whoop of laughter and smacked Colin on the knee. “You see? This is the kind of shit I miss when I’m halfway around the world. I may love learning new techniques, but nothing beats our kind of girls’ night out.”

  “Jade’s ass? I have my sights set on Ethan’s.”

  “Fine, but don’t mess him up too much because I happen to like his ass just the way it is.”

  “Roger that.” Jo got up and started pacing. She did three or four turns and stopped. “I thought the bastard kicked you out? I don’t want you setting yourself up for more heartache.”

  Colin gingerly sat forward. She took her time removing the glasses and shook her hair behind her shoulders. “Fear is the prisoner of the heart.” Tossing her shades onto the coffee table she said, “I had a hard time believing that Ethan didn’t want me after everything… Well, never mind about all that. But I was doing a lot of thinking about our last night together, the Dylan Thomas book and the way he looked at me that last time. There was a flicker of regret in his eyes, I was sure of it and after getting the strangest call from Ted Basel yesterday all I can think is there’s something not right about how Ethan dumped me.” She looked between the two of them and smiled for the first time in a week. “His buddy didn’t say too much because he said he couldn’t, he just wanted to know how I was doing. He said he was worried about Ethan. Why would he tell me that or call for that matter if Ethan was back with Jade?”

  Doc shrugged. “It wouldn’t make sense unless Basel doesn’t trust Jade, which would mean—”

  “It means,” Colin said, plucking up the previously discarded dishtowel and folding it in quarters. “That this time I’m going to fight for what’s mine. No more walking away. I’m going to go after what makes me happy and stop worrying over what everyone else thinks for a change.”

  “And kicking that woman’s ass will make you happy?”

  “Yeah.”

  Jo shrugged. “Cool.”

  Great. That was one accomplice down and one to go. She turned to Lacy, who took a moment before she answered the way she usually did at times like these. “I’m really digging your hair that way. It looks sexy, but if you’re going to pick a fight you may want to tie it back.”

  Colin gave her a quick hug and drew in a huge, cleansing breath before she let it out with a huff and asked, “Now, do either of you guys have any idea where I can get some black fishnets and maybe a matching thong?”

  “Scandals. It’s on Forty-Ninth just before the Mavion Bridge.”

  Colin was sure she wasn’t the
only one staring at Doc after that quick and matter-of-fact reply.

  Her friend didn’t even flush when she defended, “What? With a nickname like Racy Lacy you think I wouldn’t know where to shop for that kind of stuff?”

  “I thought you said you got that nickname from running the one hundred in record time.”

  “Did I say that?”

  While Jo and Doc went on to argue about discrepancies of the past, Colin silently prayed she was right about all this. There was always the possibility that she’d read more into Ted Basel’s call than what it was. No, she wasn’t going to tell herself that. It was self-defeating and if her time with Ethan had taught her anything, she’d learned her worst enemy in life was the person she faced in the mirror every morning. She was going to be good to that person now and give her a shot at this because given the week to reflect without Ethan in her life everything had become clear.

  She didn’t want to live in fear of living just because she might be ridiculed for the choices she made. Maybe a “fuck you” attitude was one she was going to have to adopt at times like these. She was a good and decent person before she met Ethan, and after she became a better person for knowing him because he’d helped her grow. And if her past and future clients didn’t like that truth too bad. Even if Wakefield hadn’t been lost to her already, she would have gladly given it up if it meant she could have Ethan in her life and that scared the hell out of her in the best possible way.

  “What goes under the fishnet?” Jo asked.

  Without hesitating, Colin replied, “The thong.”

  That’s when Doc stood and said, “Well, then the hair stays down. I’m driving seeing as how I know where sleezeville mecca is.”

  “Shotgun!”

  “Yeah, yeah,” Jo murmured taking her by the hand. “You can sit in the front although I don’t know why. You can’t see a damn thing with your eyes nearly swollen shut. Careful of the coffee table…”

  “Jade’s going to be in so much tra-bull.”

  “Easy there, Ms. Croft, you don’t want to trip down the steps and break your neck before you get the chance to go medieval on Jade’s ass.”