The Gestapo officer looked at his notes and then scoffed. “You work with plants. How can that be of vital importance to the Party?”
Q swallowed back his first response and calmly explained, “I’m working on orders from the highest authority on methods to increase agricultural production. Our Führer wants to assure that German people won’t have to suffer through years of famine as we did during the Great War.”
Judging by the pained expression on his face, the well-fed man behind the desk remembered all too well the terrible hunger he experienced two decades ago. The palpable tension in the room eased up and Q lowered his head and waited.
“Well, then you better get back to work. We wouldn’t want to interfere with the intention of our Führer.”
“Thank you, sir,” Q answered and turned to leave but was called back. “Doctor Quedlin, consider joining the Party. Questioning would have been unnecessary if you’d had the proper paperwork.”
Q thanked him for the suggestion and tamped down on the hatred he carried for everything Nazi. He went back to his laboratory, hiding his fear as best as he could. He knew it had been a very thin line that had kept him from being arrested today, and he vowed to do nothing that might draw more scrutiny from the Gestapo.
He feared for his life. Like everyone these days.
Once he was sure the Gestapo had taken their leave, he packed up his briefcase and headed home. At the sound of the slamming door, Hilde came from the small kitchen with a towel in her hands and asked, “What’s wrong, my love?”
“I can’t take it anymore,” he burst out, tossing his briefcase to the floor and sinking down into the couch.
“Can’t take what?” Hilde queried, coming to sit beside him.
“The Nazis. The war preparations. Germany! We have to leave the country if we are to ever be happy again.”
“Leave? But where would we go?” Alarm was written on her face.
“America. They appreciate scientists there. I have a future there. We do. What do we have here? Nothing but more fear and censorship.”
“But America is so far away.” Hilde seemed so small as she sank deeper into the couch beside him, and he wanted to console her.
Q put an arm around her shoulders. “I know. And this is very sudden. But we wouldn’t be alone. My cousin Fanny married an American dentist a few years back and went to live with him in Forest Hills, New York. I’m sure she would be willing to help us.”
Hilde said nothing, and after a day or two, the discussion naturally slipped to the sidelines as more pressing matters came forward.
Chapter 12
Hilde stepped out of the bathroom. She should be excited about this evening’s event, but she was having trouble mustering up any enthusiasm. Her company had made it possible for all of their employees, and a guest, to watch the movie Olympia – Fest der Schönheit/Fest der Völker by Leni Riefenstahl in the Ufa-Palast.
The movie was all the rage in Berlin – a beautiful homage to the Olympic Games – Games of Beauty and Games of Nations, held in Berlin two years earlier. Normally, Hilde would be excited about such an outing as Leni Riefenstahl made excellent and captivating movies. But Leni was also a very good friend with Hitler and lately all of her movies had been nothing more than blatant propaganda for the regime.
“You look lovely, Hilde,” Q complimented her, folding up the newspaper he’d been reading and getting to his feet as she stepped into the room.
She gave him a smile and then smoothed a hand down the skirt of her dress. It was a very smart outfit, navy blue with large white polka dots scattered all over it. A small ruffled collar with a tie combined with the pencil skirt design and white jacket completed the outfit. She pulled on her gloves after pinning the navy blue hat to her hair and then turned to look at Q. “Are you sure we need to go?”
“If you don’t go, it will certainly be noticed, and the idea is to keep a low profile. It’s better to show up and make sure the right people notice you and then leave as soon as it is practical, rather than stirring up questions as to why you were absent.”
“I know all of that,” she sighed, “I’m just tired of being bombarded by Nazi propaganda at every turn.”
Q put his hand on the small of her back. “I understand that, but this is what we need to do now. We’ll watch the movie, attend the reception for a short time and then leave.”
Hilde nodded and stepped out of the apartment while he held the door for her. They took his automobile to the Ufa-Palast, and Hilde made an effort to smile and act like she was enjoying herself as colleagues greeted her and Q.
During the break, Q and Hilde left the building through a side entrance to fill their lungs with fresh air. Some of her colleagues followed suit. When Q stopped and stared off into the distance, a peculiar stiffness filled his body. Hilde whispered, “What’s wrong?”
“Come with me and pretend nothing’s out of the ordinary,” Q breathed into her ear and led her around a corner while kissing her neck. Hilde giggled. After being married almost two years, he sure didn’t need to take her into a dark alley to kiss her.
But as soon as they were out of sight of her colleagues, a man stepped from the shadows and Q released her to greet him. “Jakob Goldmann. I was worried sick about you. Your landlady–”
Jakob pulled him in for a friendly hug. “Q, it is so good to see you. I didn’t want to get you into trouble, but when I heard that Hilde’s company rented the Ufa-Palast tonight, I hoped to see you,” Jakob said, stepping back and giving Hilde a smile.
“You look awful!” Hilde said, and it was true. Since she’d last seen him a year ago, he’d aged at least twenty years. His shoulders slumped forward and at twenty-eight, he already sported salt-and-pepper hair. Lines sharp enough to be seen in the dimly lit alley had furrowed his face and given him the look of a broken man.
“What have you been up to?” Q wanted to know.
Jakob shook his head. “Things are not good. Each day life for us Jews gets a little harder. After my landlady terminated my lease contract, I had to move in with my parents.”
Hilde felt awful for him. He’d been one of Q’s best friends, and she knew that Q felt guilty for not having kept contact with him after they returned from Italy. She put a hand on Jakob’s arm and asked. “How are your parents?”
His eyes glistened. “Dead. Both of them.”
She gasped, covering her mouth with her hand as tears sprang to her eyes. Jakob looked at her and tried a small smile. “Don’t cry for me.”
She nodded, swallowing back her tears because she could tell that he was barely keeping his own emotions together.
“My mother was forced to return from retirement. The Nazis said she was a work-shy parasite, and sent her to work in a factory producing military goods.”
“That’s horrible!” Hilde shouted, righteous anger building in her breast. Jakob’s mother was a fragile person and anyone who’d met her knew she wasn’t fit to work.
Q took her arm and said, “Shush. We don’t want your colleagues to hear us.”
Jakob cleared his throat. “Mom died one week later from a heart attack. With her fragile condition, the hard work and long hours were too much for her.”
“Oh, Jakob! I’m so sorry,” Hilde said, losing the battle to keep her tears hidden. She ducked her head and surreptitiously wiped them away.
“And your father?” Q wanted to know, placing a comforting arm around Hilde’s shoulders.
“My father stopped talking the day my mother died. Not one word. When the Nazis found out, they took him away, supposedly to a mental home. I wasn’t allowed to visit, and they wouldn’t even tell me where he was. A few days later, a letter arrived to inform me my father was dead.”
Hilde was openly crying now, and Q clasped his friend’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry, my friend. You need to leave Germany before it’s too late.”
“But–”
“No buts. Now that your parents are both gone, there’s nothing left to keep you here
. You must go if you want to survive.”
“Where should I go? All of the European countries have imposed quotas to receive Jewish immigrants from Germany.”
Q tilted his head, thinking. “The farther away, the better. Go to America. They are in need of young and brilliant scientists like you.”
“Do you really think they’ll give me a visa?”
“You’ll never know if you don’t try,” Q urged his friend. “Do it for me. So I’ll know you’re safe.”
Hilde wiped her cheeks and added, “And if you’re successful, we might come and visit you.”
Jakob chuckled. “You two are good friends. I’ll think about it.”
Too soon, it was time for Q and Hilde to slip back inside the cinema before anyone was the wiser. Jakob hugged them both once more and promised to find a way to let them know what was happening with him. Before entering the cinema, Q waited while Hilde visited the bathroom and splashed some cool water on her face.
When she returned, she felt only slightly better, and even more anxious for the evening to come to an end.
Chapter 13
Three months later, Hilde and Q came home to find a letter from Q’s cousin Fanny in America. She told them about her life in Forest Hills, New York and asked about the well-being of the other family members. The letter ended with an invitation to visit her and her husband for a few weeks.
“What do you think, Hilde?” Q asked. “Should we try to get travel visas for America?”
“That sounds exciting,” Hilde answered. “I’ll get three weeks of leave next summer.”
Over dinner, they made plans for their upcoming vacation across the ocean and Q teased Hilde about her excitement.
Just as they finished eating dinner and Hilde was washing the dishes in the kitchen, the telephone rang. Q answered it. “Wilhelm Quedlin.”
“It’s Jakob.”
“Jakob, it’s good to hear from you.” Q gripped the telephone receiver tighter. Since he’d last seen his friend at the Ufa-Palast, he’d only heard bad news. Jakob had been disposed from his job, repeatedly harassed by Brownshirts when running errands, and he’d been denied visas by several European countries.
“I have good news,” Jakob said, and Q released his breath. “I received my visa to emigrate to America. The final paperwork arrived this afternoon, and I’m already booked on a ship out of Hamburg three days from now, on November tenth, to travel to New York.”
“That’s great news! Congratulations!”
“Thanks. I’m so relieved. This ship will take me to safety. Finally.” Jakob hesitated. “Q?”
“What, my friend?”
“I hate to ask…but the situation with the trains…do you think there’s any way you could drive me to Hamburg?”
“Of course I’ll drive you down. It’s the least I can do.”
“Thank you. It means a lot. I need to take care of a few more things, given that I most likely won’t come back…” Jakob’s voice broke.
Q could feel the pain in his friend’s heart. It wasn’t easy to leave everything behind and embark on an uncertain adventure. “Don’t worry. You’ll do just fine. And you’ll find yourself a nice young woman soon enough over there.”
Jakob tried a chuckle. “I’m sure I will. It’s not safe for you to come to my place. Can you meet me by the train station? Seven o’clock Thursday morning.”
“Sure. See you then and take care.” Q hung up the phone just as Hilde exited the kitchen, drying her hands with a towel.
“Who were you talking to?” she asked.
“Jakob. He’s got a visa for America.” Q took Hilde in his arms and whirled her around, then set her back on her feet. “He asked me to drive him to the harbor in Hamburg on Thursday.”
“Oh. That’s wonderful. We might even be able to visit him there next summer.” Q loved to see the genuine smile on her face. Maybe the first in many weeks. But then, she wrinkled her nose.
“What’s wrong, Liebling?” Q asked.
“Nothing. I just thought…if I ask for two days’ leave, I could come with you. We could visit my family for the weekend.”
“That’s a terrific idea. We’ll do that.” Q agreed.
***
Thursday morning arrived, and Q and Hilde arrived at the allotted place in time, but Jakob never showed up.
“Where is he?” Hilde asked, worry in her voice.
“I don’t know. This is unlike him. He’s usually overly punctual.”
They waited in the automobile and Q turned the radio on, searching for a musical program to help release some of the tension that was quickly building. Instead of a musical program, he could only find news report after news report. Giving up, he let the radio play and horror seeped deep into his body at what he heard.
Last night, November 9, 1938, the Nazi regime had launched a terror campaign against the Jewish people in both Germany and Austria. Reichskristallnacht, the Night of Broken Glass, as the radio speaker called it.
Q’s stomach churned at the vivid detail of the violence that had occurred throughout the night. The radio speaker didn’t even try to hide his enthusiasm as he recounted all the atrocities committed against the Jewish citizens. Ransacked homes. Sledgehammered businesses. Demolished schools. Burnt synagogues. Profaned graveyards. Hundreds of Jews murdered. Thousands arrested and sent to concentration camps.
“How did we not know this was happening?” Hilde asked, tears in her eyes.
“We don’t live in an area where there are any Jews.” Q’s voice was barely audible.
“You don’t think that something happened to Jakob? Did he live in a Jewish part of the city?”
Q nodded and immediately started the automobile. “Jakob was living in his parents’ house. So yes, he lived in a Jewish quarter.” He drove towards that part of the city, and as they passed by Jewish businesses and homes, the devastation was harrowing.
Deserted streets with bodies lying where they’d fallen. Smoldering fires. Q swallowed hard. “Hilde, this is probably not a good idea.”
Hilde wiped her tears. “Don’t you want to know?”
Q nodded, tears clogging his throat at the senseless acts of violence in plain view. “Maybe he needs our help. We have to get to his place.”
They drove the rest of the way in silence. When the debris in the street made it impossible to drive any farther, he parked and opened the door for Hilde, and they picked their way towards the small house where Jakob’s parents had lived.
Q took a deep breath before he pushed the door open and entered the hallway. Then he froze. Jakob lay at the bottom of the stairs, his lifeless eyes staring up at the ceiling, his skin swollen and battered, a pool of dried blood beneath his head.
He swallowed back the bile that rose in his throat and turned, intending to keep Hilde from seeing this, but he was too late. She took one look at Jakob’s body and screamed. The windows in the staircase resonated with her voice and Q was afraid they’d burst.
He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her out of the building, burying her head against his chest in an effort to calm her down. “Shush!”
Hilde’s muffled screams filled the air, and Q looked up and down the street, fearing upset neighbors – or worse – to bombard them. But no one came running. Q noticed a curtain moving in one of the buildings, but the street remained abandoned.
Soon, Hilde’s screams eased into sobbing, and he wished he could release his emotions in the same way. Despite the grief, his eyes stayed dry. The weight of guilt for his friend’s death pressed on his shoulders, making it difficult to breathe. I wasn’t there to help him. If I only had urged Jakob to leave the country earlier, he’d be safe on the ship by now. I should have made more of an effort to keep in touch with him, to protect him. He was my best friend…
“Don’t do this.” Hilde looked up at him with puffy tear-stained eyes, clasping his cheeks in her hands.
“Do what?” Q asked, his voice husky with unshed tears.
“I know y
ou. You’re feeling guilty for what happened. But there was nothing you could have done to prevent it.”
“I could have tried–”
“Tried what? To stop the Nazis from looting?”
Q nodded. She was right, but it didn’t make things any easier. He looked back towards the building. The windows were broken, furniture was smashed, belongings were strewn about…it looked like a war zone.
“I want to say a prayer for him. You don’t have to join me.”
“Of course I will, he was my friend, too,” Hilde answered, straightening her spine and her resolve.
He stepped back inside the building, keeping Hilde close to his side and said a quick prayer for Jakob’s soul. It was the only thing they could do. He wished there was some way to organize a proper burial, but under the circumstances, it was impossible. As cruel as it was, he and Hilde had to return to their automobile, leaving Jakob lying there at the bottom of the stairs.
Q drove them back to their place, glancing at Hilde frequently. Her face had turned ghostly white, and she was awfully quiet, sitting perfectly still, except for her hands. She was worrying her fingers to the point where he finally reached over and covered them, knowing she was going to injure herself if she continued.
“Hilde?”
“I want out. I just want away from all of this.”
Q squeezed her hands. “We should drive to Hamburg as planned. It will get us away from Berlin for a few days, and your sisters will distract us.”
“Without Jakob? Who should have embarked on the ship to start a new life…”
“We have to move on, Hilde. As hard as it is, there is nothing we can do for Jakob. But we can help ourselves by giving our minds a small reprieve from the grief.”
Unyielding: Love and Resistance in WW2 Germany (World War II Trilogy) Page 7