by Calinda B
“Maybe things will work better than you think.” His aunt gave him an encouraging smile.
“I don’t know. It’s hard to let someone in. Kate really did a number on me. I’m a poster child for trust issues.” He laughed, bitterly.
“Jace, honey…”
He put his hand up. “Enough head tripping. I’ve got to head back to work. Let’s see if I can put her down without waking her.”
As he rose, attempting not to wake the little one in his arms, his aunt asked, “Is everything all right, dear? You seem troubled.”
“You know how I feel about my sister and this situation.”
“I don’t mean to pry but I sense that something else is on your mind.” She picked up her sandwich and nibbled on it.
“Remember I told you about the trouble with Billy?”
“Yes.”
“More of the same. He’s nothing but a shit.”
Marni stirred and whimpered.
“Shhh,” he said, jiggling her up and down.
“Want to tell me about it? You still have a few minutes.” She reached for their plates, crumpling up the paper napkins inside the ice tea glasses.
“Auntie, I really don’t. I have a lot on my mind. And I don’t want to mess things up with Zoé. I need to get this shit sorted before I introduce her to our fair hamlet. Let’s just say it’s a hell of a time to start a new relationship.”
“Anything I can do to help?”
“You’re already doing enough with kid care. Just wish me luck. I’ll figure it out.”
“You know we’re here for you.”
“I know. This one’s on me to figure out. You and practically half the town have helped me out at one time or another.” He smiled at her ruefully. “I figure I have to grow up eventually. May as well be now. Just so long as I can do it Savage style,” he added, giving her wink.
“Lord help us, child. I can only imagine. If it’s going to be Savage style we’re all in for trouble.”
Chapter 13
Zoé
Zoé hefted the last tray of chrysanthemums into the back of her best friend Tanya’s truck. The sun slid along its lazy Indian summer trajectory, falling behind the garden storefront of Tony and Tanya’s Garden Supplies, at the far end of the plant yard. It left its heat behind, still radiating from the warm dirt between the rows of plants.
She’d raced over to help Tanya after work at Chica Rios, giving her little time to think about Jace and their last fantastic date. Hollywood sex. I had sex on the back of a motorcycle. She smiled, as her body surged with pleasure.
“I’m glad you could help out today,” Tanya said. “Tony’s on a job in West Seattle and he’s taken half the crew to help him. Plus, we’ve been short-handed lately.”
“I’m glad you asked me. Any chance I can get to make a little extra income really helps.”
Zoé lifted the dirty white tailgate into place. She gave the tailgate a shove to lock it into position. “That’s the last of the mums, Tanya. You’ve got your Goatsbeard, Alpine Strawberries, Blanket Flower, and Lewisia. Oh, and the Blue Lupine, too. It’s going to be a beautiful garden of native plants when you’ve finished with it.” She glanced at the greenhouse. “Anything else?”
“Thanks, no,” Tanya said, pushing her sweat stained, light brown hair out of her eyes, leaving a smudge of dirt on her cheek. Her denim shirt and pants were covered with grime. “Haven’t seen much of you lately. Want to go get a drink when I get back from dropping these off?”
“Sorry, can’t,” Zoé said, her face turning its typical crimson. “I’m a mess.” She looked down at her dirty work clothes. “And I have a date.”
“A date, huh? So, you heave-hoed that Billy guy?”
“Yeah,” she said, her insides squeezing hard on the topic of Billy. She rubbed her arm, releasing horrible memories of Billy and his treatment of her. She shook both hands to free herself of thoughts of him. “Jace is wonderful.” She removed her garden gloves and placed them on one of the nearby wooden tables holding potted plants.
“That’s great. Where are you two going?”
“Not sure yet. He said it’s a surprise.”
“A surprise, huh? I thought you hated surprises. Every time I’ve tried to plan a surprise birthday party for you, you’ve pitched a fit.” She plucked the work gloves from her fingers and tossed them in the truck.
“I know. Jace seems to inspire a different part of me. One that’s freer.” She grinned. “We’re having fun.”
“How long have you known him?” Tanya asked, leaning against the driver’s door. “Must be sorta new or you would have told me. A month?”
“Just a few days. But we’ve grown deep already. He likes to move fast.” She placed her hip against the cargo bed.
“A few days?” Tanya’s eyebrows rose. “That’s hardly enough time to get to know the color of your boyfriend’s eyes.”
“Oh, I know it sounds fast, but trust me —he means what he says,” Zoé said defensively.
“And what’s that? What did he say that he means?” Tanya pushed away from the door and reached for the handle. “Hop in. I’ll drive you to your Jeep.”
Zoé opened the door and slid into the dusty passenger seat. “Oh, he told me he had plans for me and he intended to follow through with his plans.”
“What kind of plans?” Tanya said, fishing in the glove box for her keys. She stuck them in the ignition and turned on the Ford.
Lots of sex.
“I don’t know. Just plans,” Zoé said with a huff. “Since when do I tell you how to live your life?”
“Whoa, babe, where’s this coming from?” Tanya said. She pulled the truck out of the garden greenhouse area and headed toward the parking lot adjacent to the storefront. “I’m only asking questions.”
“Sorry,” Zoé said. Am I being stupid in thinking Jace and I are more than fuck buddies? Is it going to wear off in a couple of weeks, once he’s tired of me? He’s probably got girls waiting for a turn. “It’s moving kind of fast, you’re right. It seems a little too good to be true, actually.”
“What’s he do?”
“He works on yachts. And takes photos. Works for Nat Geo sometimes.”
“Sounds impressive.” Tanya pulled alongside Zoé’s Jeep. “Have you kissed yet? You always were a sucker for a good kisser.”
“Not that I’ve had that many,” Zoé said. “But yes, we kissed.”
The flush in her cheeks grew hotter.
“You’ve had sex!” Tanya said, scrutinizing her. “You, the girl who swore to me you were going to take your time after Billy messed with your heart. What was it you told me? Something about how you learned your lesson by hooking up with Billy so fast? You’ve had sex!” she said again. “How was it?”
Zoé turned to look at her friend. “Oh, my God, that’s how.”
She couldn’t stop her face from splitting into a grin.
“Holy shit, girlfriend,” Tanya spluttered. Her eyes narrowed. “The only other guy you’ve done that with was Billy. That didn’t turn out so well. I hope you aren’t repeating yourself. Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
“Not sure at all, to tell the truth.” Zoé bit her lip. “He’s got a lot of mysteries floating about him.”
“What kind of mysteries?”
“He seems to be in some sort of trouble and he won’t tell me what it is. I’m giving him a chance to tell me in his own time. It’s all new, you know? I don’t want to rush things.”
Tanya burst out laughing. “Sounds like things are flying. Is he the one who’s pushing things along?”
“Oh, no. It’s mutual,” she said, wanting to assure Tanya that she knew what she was doing, even if she didn’t. “I feel like an…” Addict. “Never mind.”
Tanya frowned. “What kind of mysteries?”
“We were hanging out the other day and he got a call from some girl named Lila. Said he’d be home as quick as he could and he left.” She scrunched up her face.
“That sounds very suspicious. Could be he has a woman at home and he’s using you as a plaything. You remember Jack. He played you like a trout on the line, keeping secrets. And I doubt Billy ever kept it in his pants when you weren’t together.” Tanya drummed her fingers along the steering wheel.
Her insides bunched together in a knot of insecurity. “That’s what I thought, too. But he seems so sincere! I really want to believe he’s the real deal.” Gritting her teeth, Zoé raked her hair with both her hands.
“He sounds like a womanizer — another Billy boy. That’s what womanizers do.” Tanya tapped the steering wheel. “Draw a line in the sand. Set some boundaries. He doesn’t get to pass Go until he reveals himself. Honesty is the foundation of any good relationship, you know that.”
“I’ve certainly heard that,” Zoé said dejectedly. “Can’t say I’ve experienced it. Jack lied all the time. And, Billy told me nothing but lies. ‘I think this is what I’ve been looking for, Zoé,’” she said in a low voice. “‘I can’t believe how lucky I am, Zoé.’ Those are probably his signature statements to get into bed with a woman. After he got into my pants, he was history.”
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about, honey. All guys know how to make a move on a woman to get what they want.”
“You sound cynical.”
“A little, maybe. I’ve been rushed before, too. While it felt great at first, it always ended in disaster.”
“Are you telling me you have a boring connection with Tony?” Zoé twisted in her seat, pinning her gaze on Tanya.
“Oh, no, not at all. Tony and I have a solid connection. We met after one of my disasters and he seemed perfect. Solid, predictable, honest, and safe.” She stared out the window.
I wonder if she believes that. “Don’t you ever miss the thrill of a passionate connection?” Zoé asked. “The excitement?”
“Not really,” Tanya said, brushing dust off the seat. “Well, sometimes. But I wouldn’t trade Tony for all the excitement in the world. I like the predictability. I like that I can count on him. That’s what mattered to me in the end.” She glanced at the clock on the dash. “I’ve got to scoot, Zoé.”
Zoé nodded and pulled the door handle, swinging the truck door wide. “Yeah, me, too.” She clambered out of the truck.
“All I’m saying is — be safe. Check him out. You don’t want to get in over your head.”
Too late for that, Zoé thought. She smiled at Tanya.
“Thanks, T. I’ll be fine.” She shut the door, and then leaned on the passenger window frame. “Good luck with the garden design.”
“Thanks. And remember. Whatever happens between you two, you can always count on me. Friends last. Boy toys come and go.” Tanya gave her a warm smile.
Zoé returned the smile. She stepped away from the truck, and lifted her hand in a good-bye, as Tanya backed up.
She unlocked her car, opened the door, and slid into the seat. Doubt filled her mind. Could Tanya be right? Am I fooling myself into thinking one night of great sex means something?
Guys had told her bullshit lines before, like, “This was the best sex, I’ve ever had.” Or, “I’d be a fool to let you go.”
And where are those guys today? On to the next girl, or the one after that, or the next one.
She cranked on the engine and backed up faster than she’s intended. She stepped on the gas and sped into the street.
An oncoming car screeched, swerving to miss her. “Watch where you’re going!” the driver yelled at her.
She cringed. “Sorry,” she said with a wave. She let out an exasperated groan. “Tanya’s right. I need answers. He’s keeping something from me and I’m making it okay, thinking he’ll cut and run if I demand the truth. He’s probably using me, like Billy.”
By the time she got home, she’d whipped herself into a froth. She parked in front of the garage, got out, and stormed to the front door. She threw her keys on the small table near the door. Then, she stalked toward the couch and flopped down, letting her head fall back. Maybe I should call him and bail. Text him and tell him something came up.
Her body had other ideas. It begged her to have sex with him again. Deciding to at least give him a chance, she headed for the shower.
At precisely six fifteen, Jace arrived, ringing the doorbell.
She opened the door and stared at him. Her insides felt numb and cold, like she’d done time on an iceberg.
“Hi,” he said, grinning widely. He looked at her face and faltered. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong. Come in.” She turned and headed into the living room.
He strode in behind her. “Seems like something’s wrong.”
“It’s nothing.” She pushed aside some pillows and sat on the sofa.
He sat in a chair opposite her.
“Can I get you anything?” Zoé didn’t meet his eyes.
“Yeah, you can tell me what’s wrong. Earlier today you were excited to see me. What happened between then and now?”
She stared at his handsome face. I’m being unreasonable. Give him a chance to explain. She opened her mouth and then closed it, pressing it into a tight line. No. Tanya’s right. Make him explain.
“What the fuck is wrong, Zoé?” he said, his voice as sharp as an ax.
She jerked back. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. What the fuck is wrong? You’re acting like I did something wrong but you’re the only one who knows what it is.”
“I am not,” she retorted.
“Don’t bullshit me, Zoé. I don’t play that way.”
She glared at him. “Someone has a temper.”
“I don’t like to be played with. Now tell me what’s going on. Now.” He leaned forward, placing his forearms on his thighs.
Her mouth fell open. No one’s ever talked this way to me.
“You tell me,” she challenged. “I want to hear about your trouble. I want to know who Lila is and why you had to rush home to her,” she said in a sarcastic tone, tiny knives of insecurity stabbing her insides.
“Are you jealous?” he asked. His mouth hung open for a second, before he snapped it shut.
“No!” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“You’re jealous. You’re convinced I’m stepping out on you. You think I demanded exclusive rights while I’m playing around.”
“Are you?”
“No.”
The word hit her with such force, she jerked.
“You look like a wrathful god,” she said in a whisper, stunned by his beauty even while enraged.
“That’s because I’m pissed.” He puffed out his cheeks and blew out his breath. “I told you,” he said in clipped tones, “I’m not going to tear open my soul until I’m ready.”
“You’re not reassuring me,” she said, her voice louder than she intended.
“That’s because there’s nothing to reassure you about,” he said, his voice matching hers.
“Prove it.”
“You have to trust me. I can’t tell you.”
“Can’t or won’t?” She flipped her head, tossing her hair behind her shoulder.
“Won’t.”
His green gaze crashed into her, making her feel small and stupid with her accusations.
“How can I trust you? This you and me thing is going awfully fast.” She gestured back and forth between them.
“And you said you liked it.” His jaw worked back and forth, muscles ticking. “Don’t make this more complicated than it is.”
His words lashed at her, like whips. She pressed back into the sofa.
He inhaled deeply, letting it out slowly through pursed lips.
“I’m sorry,” he said in a softer tone. “Please tell me what’s wrong. I’ve had a shitty couple of days and all I wanted to do is be here and forget about them—with you.”
She let out a deep breath. “I’ve been looking forward to seeing you, too, Jace.”
“I can’t tell. You seem cold as ice.�
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“Sounds about right. You heard me say I like a good cold one,” she said, in an attempt at levity.
He didn’t smile, just continued to look at her with a hard, stony gaze.
She sighed. “I had a talk with a friend today. She warned me to find out more about you. She convinced me you’re using me. We hardly know each other, remember?”
Jace shook his head slowly. “I see. Your friend wants to vet me, too. Give me her number. I’ll give her a call…not.” He gripped the arms of the chair, the chiseled muscles of his forearms bunching, making the knife blade tattoo writhe across his skin. “Jesus, Zoé. Don’t you trust yourself to know what’s right?”
“I guess I don’t. I ended up with Billy O’Reilly, didn’t I? What does that tell you about the way I make choices?”
His demeanor softened. He gazed at her with his heart melting, emerald eyes.
“It makes you someone looking for something and you made a wrong turn. I think you wanted this.” He pointed to her and him. Then he stood.
She shrank back into the cushiony couch.
He took a step toward her.
“I think you really like the way I make you feel, yeah?” he said in a low, rich voice.
The sound stirred her insides, making her feel crazy strange. She gazed at his powerful arms, ripped with muscle. Her gaze tracked along his chest, his belly, and his…oh, God. He’s hard as a rock.
“I think the way I make you feel scares the shit out of you, am I right?” he said, taking another step. “Because you can’t control it.”
She glanced at his hips, then swung her gaze back up to his face.
“Checking to see if I’m hard for you?” He took another step, until he stood directly in front of her. “Tell me what you see.”
“Yes.”
“Yes, what?” He closed the gap between them, until he loomed over her.