by Carol Oates
Without warning this time, Sebastian’s hands came to rest at the top of Candra’s arms. He was perfectly still, holding her tentatively. She was sure he was waiting to see if she was comfortable with his touch. Eventually he turned her slowly to face him, and she complied without hesitation, looking up to see an unexpected amused smile.
She pursed her lips, and a bolt of electricity flashed through her body like a shot of adrenaline, a flash of pure excitement. She stepped back before any words had a chance to fully come together in her head.
“I swear, Candra, I won’t hurt you,” Sebastian promised immediately, holding his hand up again to show he meant no harm. His eyes betrayed the hurt Candra’s reaction inadvertently inflicted.
“I’m not scared,” she replied honestly. His eyes narrowed skeptically.
“I’m not. Really, I’m not.”
Sebastian’s bottom lip protruded slightly when he pursed them. In response, Candra searched her mind and body again for something, anything to tell her she was in danger. Her heart was beating normally. Her breathing was easy. There were no butterflies or spike of fear—there was nothing there. She had no doubt in her mind Sebastian was capable of being dangerous if he wanted to be; she’d sensed it from him right away. There was more than a touch of something feral about him. That was the wrongness she felt: she should be scared of him, but she wasn’t.
“I have to take you home now. There might be some answers waiting for you.”
Answers…answers were good. She needed them if she was ever going to process the things she was finally, if belatedly, working out.
“I have a question.”
One of the things Candra worked out was that Sebastian wasn’t playing by the rules. Brie made him promise not to tell her what he was, so instead he showed her. She guessed from the phone call he was meant to take her right home, instead he sat with her all day while the cogs of her sluggish brain turned over the silent answers he was giving her.
“I’ll answer if I can.” His fingers flexed out by his side.
Sebastian had mentioned the right questions before. Candra was sure at this point the right question was one he could answer. His jaw tightened in anticipation, making the small muscles at the side of his face jump, and she took a deep breath, steeling herself for his answer.
“Are you the good guys or the bad guys?”
His gaze fell to the ground almost instantly, his shoulders slumping. She knew that couldn’t be a good sign. When Sebastian’s eyes once again lifted to meet hers, the dying light of the day caught the gold, picking it out from the silvery gray, making them shimmer. He sighed heavily and then took a labored breath.
“When I figure that out for myself, you have my word I will give you an answer,” he admitted earnestly.
By the time they arrived back at the townhouse, Brie and Candra shared, the sky had turned almost black, the way it only can on a moonless night in Acheron. Sebastian momentarily wished for a time when the skyline wasn’t as crowded and the blanket of night was scattered with pinpricks of white light filling the blackness.
Candra walked silently beside him the whole way back to the house. It suited him that way. He didn’t want to be the one to have to answer the questions he knew she would have buzzing around her head right now. He had absolutely no idea what was bringing on his sudden bout of nerves. There was a fine line to tread between revealing what she needed to know and revealing too much, and part of him was wracked with apprehension about the too much part. Sebastian didn’t want his intrusion in her life to ruin her relationship with Ambriel. He knew he wasn’t malicious despite what anyone thought, and he certainly didn’t want Candra to hate him as he was sure she inevitably would. It wasn’t the first time he’d regretted coming back.
Candra walked closer to him than she had earlier. Sebastian couldn’t figure out why, but the distance had closed between them on more than a physical level. The barrier Candra had maintained over the last few days had been demolished. He worried she would regret it and found himself, yet again, wishing she would never have to.
The house was a three-story at the end of a tree-lined street in a nice part of the city, where there were fewer of the imposing and ugly glass skyscrapers that had sprung up over the last hundred years. Sebastian disliked them intensely. They overshadowed many of the streets, and their reflective surfaces only succeeded in making the city seem even more overcrowded. The last thing he wanted to see, day in and day out, was a reflection of his own misery. He still remembered Acheron as the place it all began.
The lights were on in the living room as they approached, and Sebastian had barely grazed his foot on the bottom step of the stairs that led to the red front door when Lofi flew through it. Her expression was thunderous.
“Where have you been? You were supposed to have been here hours ago.”
Candra smiled weakly. Sebastian sighed and trudged up the steep steps, suddenly feeling like he was dragging concrete around his ankles.
“Are you okay?” Lofi asked Candra, taking her bag from her shoulder and darting Sebastian a vicious glare.
He was nervous as hell; he knew Gabe would be furious if he knew what had transpired at the park—Brie even more so.
Candra was still looking down at her feet. She tilted her head sideways to snatch a look at him and just as quickly darted her eyes away again.
“Yes, I’m fine. We went for coffee. It was, em…nice.”
It shocked Sebastian that she was covering for him—not that he was going to complain, and he made every effort not to outwardly show his surprise.
“Nice?” Lofi scoffed, clearly already dubious of their story.
They made their way into the front room where Ambriel was waiting for them, sitting on the couch with her hands clasped nervously in her lap. Sebastian felt a pang of guilt, knowing they wouldn’t be here if he had just been capable of minding his own business in the first place, if he could have stayed away, if he had never agreed to come to this forsaken place in the beginning. He wasn’t created a monster…but it had happened, all of it, and there was no way to change the past. Anyway, he argued with himself, if he had stayed away it was quite possible Candra would be dead. For some reason the very idea made him shudder.
This was a home for Ambriel. He knew the very moment he stepped inside the door. Everything from the spotlessly clean surfaces to the meticulously placed furniture—minimal and yet homey—screamed her personality. Ambriel was always like that: just enough for what was needed, just enough to be ready for whatever came next. She never planned too far ahead; that was made clear by the love seat positioned against the wall and the one matching brown leather La-Z-Boy situated by the bay window. Ambriel wasn’t expecting many visitors, and so she didn’t believe it necessary to provide seating.
Gabe stood by the fireplace, bent forward to carefully study the several church candles in the grate and actively avoiding looking at Ambriel. Sebastian had unconsciously taken the seat next to Ambriel and rested his hand on her shoulder, and only noticed when her hand came up to lightly pat his. When Lofi averted her eyes, a tremor of regret rushed through him.
Nice going, he thought to himself. Hurting the ones closest to me, breaking promises, lying…
“Candra, this is Gabe,” Ambriel said. Her voice was lifeless, defeated.
Candra stepped forward into the room. She didn’t look at or acknowledge Ambriel, Lofi, or even Sebastian. Her full attention was intensely concentrated on Gabe. He stood up and turned toward her. Candra was still wearing Sebastian’s jacket, and her small hand poked out from the long sleeve when she lifted it to shake Gabe’s. He took her hand, and a small smile crept across his lips. He towered over her, and her hand looked lost in his large golden grip. Her back was straight and proud as she weighed and measured him assuredly, taking in his short dark hair and severe masculine features. Gabe had the wide shoulders and muscled physique of a soldier. Gabe was created a warrior just like Payne had been.
It was anothe
r life, a different time when they had to be soldiers, Sebastian reflected. It was just another part of history now, and he truly wished for it to stay that way.
Candra’s chin lifted an inch, defiantly. “As in the Angel Gabriel, I take it?”
Chapter Four
In the blink of an eye, Brie flew at Sebastian, only held back by Lofi firmly gripping her arms. Still she fought to get at him while he looked on, riddled with the guilt that was clearly evident on his face.
“Yes,” Gabe replied.
Candra would have known even if he hadn’t answered, even if he’d lied, that he was connected to the others. She knew the instant he turned, the light golden flecks in the pupils of his almond-shaped eyes were a dead giveaway. He had the same air of maturity in his young face; even though he did look older than the others, he would still barely pass for twenty-one. Like Lofi and Sebastian, he was beautiful. His auburn hair created a dark halo around his perfectly symmetrical angel features.
“How could you?” Brie sneered toward Sebastian, who was backed up against the wall between the love seat and the door.
“He didn’t tell me that he’s an angel…” Strictly speaking it was true. “I guessed, Brie, and you’ve just confirmed my suspicion.”
Candra pulled her hand away from Gabe’s gentle grip. Touched by an angel, she thought and bit back the bleak chuckle that almost escaped at the absurdity of her life. Brie turned to Candra, going soft in Lofi’s constraints and looking older than she ever had. Candra wondered when Brie had last had any sleep at all…or had eaten. Her jeans were hanging loosely on her hips, and she was pale, almost chalky white. She looked relieved and scared, all at the same time.
Candra rolled her eyes, hoping they didn’t possess supersensitive hearing so her thumping heart wouldn’t give away the fact that while she wasn’t afraid, she was freaking out just a little on the inside.
“You sent me to Catholic school, Brie. They may have mentioned angels once or twice. It only took me this long to work out because the idea is too ridiculous to entertain.” She looked down to the ground as the truth seemed to hit her square in her chest with a painful thud, and she understood what Sebastian had meant. “I guess I knew as soon as I first saw Lofi and Sebastian, but my mind didn’t want to see it.”
When she lifted her head, Brie was watching her with concern. “Are you okay?”
Candra laughed then, a half-snort, half-sigh, and rubbed the back of her neck with the flat of her palm. It was damp. She didn’t need the jacket inside the house, but it covered the small blood stain on her back where Sebastian had healed her. Of course she realized now it hadn’t been the first time he’d healed her—he was obviously the reason she’d lived through the fall at the parking garage. If keeping him on her side meant sweating a little, so be it.
It was the same reason she’d covered for him when they arrived at the door. Candra had sensed that all Lofi’s irritation was directed at Sebastian, and that the blame for disappearing with her would fall firmly at his feet, but Sebastian held answers she needed. He seemed the only one willing to share. She had wanted to be sure that if whatever conversation was waiting for them inside didn’t tell her enough, Sebastian would still be there to fill in the gaps.
She had guessed when Sebastian lied on the phone about them going for coffee that it bothered him. He had flinched away from the words and looked uncomfortable; again, outside with Lofi, he had flinched at the lie. Lofi didn’t notice, but Candra did. In her experience, it was harder to notice things like that in people you see every day for a long time; behavioral quirks were easily dismissed. If she was going to get the whole truth from anyone, it was going to be Sebastian, and if he was lying, she’d know now that she had worked out his “tell.” Covering for him was a small price to pay and so were her own white lies.
“Yes, I think I’m okay, but I want to know what’s going on.” She knew it was highly unlikely she would get the truth right now. If they were covering something for as long as she had been alive, she guessed they wouldn’t spill everything right away.
Brie looked so shaken and upset that Candra had the urge to try to feed her chicken noodle soup, the way Brie used to do to her whenever something bothered her. It was Gabe that answered.
“Of course.”
Candra didn’t miss the short warning glance in Sebastian’s direction before he guided her to the La-Z-Boy to sit. She didn’t like the way he made her feel like a guest in her own home. He took a seat on the love seat near Candra, and Brie returned to her own seat while seeming to keep as much distance between herself and them as possible. Unperturbed, Lofi sat on the arm next to her and wrapped her arm around Brie’s shoulder pulling her nearer. This left only Sebastian standing uncomfortably with his back to the wall.
“So, what do you want to know?” Gabe started.
“Everything,” she answered without a moment hesitation.
His handsome face lit up with a chuckle, and his head fell back a little. Candra wondered why that was amusing.
“Everything is an awful lot to tell,” he said brightly. “Maybe we should start with the simple things.” Again his eyes shot to Sebastian with a silent warning.
Sebastian’s guarded expression revealed nothing of his emotions. He simply crossed his arms over his chest, but Candra noticed how the sinewy muscle flexed in his forearms, betraying him and giving away the tension he seemed to be feeling.
“Maybe,” she muttered frostily, secretly hoping she would get all her answers before the night was over regardless. “Am I an angel?” Even as the words passed her lips, they sounded insane—this whole thing was beyond insane.
Brie winced, but calmed within seconds when Lofi began rubbing her shoulder soothingly.
“No,” Gabe said with a confidence which was impossible to doubt.
Candra sighed out a breath she was holding, feeling relieved and disappointed at the same time because clearly her part in this whole situation was a little bit more complicated. “Is Brie?”
Gabe turned his gaze to Brie in a move that seemed almost reflexive, as if his gaze was drawn to her. She avoided him, keeping her eyes on the stripped floor, staring at it with determination. He smiled at her sadly, but she didn’t see. “No.” Then he turned his attention back to Candra.
“Why was that woman after me?”
“After you?” he echoed as if she’d just spoken in a foreign language. Even so, he was an angel; if she had spoken in another language, Candra was sure he would still have understood. Wasn’t speaking in tongues meant to be part of the angelic deal?
Acid bubbled in her stomach. He couldn’t actually deny that Flame-hair was after her, could he? Especially since she’d been outside of Candra’s school twice now, to her knowledge: once that morning and once the day Flame-hair followed her—the day she did that thing that made Candra fall from the parking garage. Who knew how many other times there had been? Candra shivered uncomfortably just thinking about it, and her eyes darted to Sebastian, remembering what Lofi said about Flame-hair not holding back with him.
“Yes, after me,” she stated harshly. “If you are going to be honest, then let’s be honest.”
Sebastian pushed off from the wall, uncrossing his arms and clenching his fists so tightly the veins protruded from his flesh. He stood stock-still in anticipation of Gabe’s response.
“We don’t know. Who’s to know why she does what she does.”
Candra glowered at Gabe dangerously and bounced from her seat. “Fine! If you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine, but please don’t come here acting under the misconception that I am naïve or stupid.”
He caught her hand as she tried to move away. “Wait.” His voice was flooded with impatience, and she looked down to him—she had no choice: his fingers were like iron closed around her wrist. “Sit,” he instructed.
She didn’t. She waited, unsure of what to do. Candra didn’t know if she could trust his answers. Sebastian appeared to be the only person in the room willi
ng to be honest with her about anything. It was all so complicated. She didn’t want to trust him either, but her choices appeared limited.
“Please sit down, Candra,” Brie whispered quietly.
Candra felt a twist of shame inside her, knowing she should also trust Brie, but how could she when Brie had been lying to her? All the same, Candra sighed, unable to deny her, and retook her seat.
“We don’t know what Ananchel wants with you,” he began with an innocent smile. His long arms rested on his knees, bringing him forward a little. “She is unpredictable; there could be any number of reasons why she has been in your shadow. It could be as simple as she saw Sebastian watching you, which alone would be enough to pique her interest. Of course, it could have even been a coincidence.”
His last conclusion directed Candra to her next question. This one she asked while staring straight at Sebastian who was picking at his perfectly manicured nail and blatantly evading eye contact.
“Why were you following me?”
“I’ve already answered that question,” he said without lifting his head.
“No,” Brie added. “He was following me.” She glanced over her shoulder to him sadly. Her shoulders drooped just a little further, and Candra couldn’t help being inquisitive about these two and what, exactly, had their relationship been in the past.
Sebastian flinched. Maybe it was true she conceded, but not completely.
“He’s your brother?” Candra indicated to Sebastian by nodding her head. They were all still being too vague for her liking, and Lofi didn’t appear inclined to add anything at all.
“In a way,” Brie answered in a hushed murmur.
Candra could feel her frustration getting ready to overflow the shaky dam holding it back. The air in the room was stifling, and she desperately wanted to remove the heavy jacket. She could feel the beads of sweat forming under her hair and trickling down the back of her neck, making her body feel hot and sticky. Candra briefly wondered if a well-placed scream would shock any of them into an honest reaction.