“After Saturday, you won’t have to,” I murmured. “If I pass through the Gadawnoin.”
“Then let us hope you make it, or I’ll follow you into the underworld to bring you back.” Then, as tired as I was, I responded to his hands as he began to run them over my breasts. I needed him—needed to feel alive and vibrant and that something…anything…was still the same. As he slid inside me, I was able to let the fear and the worry go, and for the next hour, all I knew was that I was in the arms of my beloved Lord of the Hunt, and that we were together.
The next morning, I woke late, to a servant girl bringing in my breakfast on a tray. As she prepared my bath, I ate waffles and sausage, applesauce and coffee. Herne must have brought over a supply. I knew he had imported coffee plants the year before, as well, insisting that Annwn had to have its own source.
The girl paused as I finished my meal. “Milady, may I talk to you?”
I blinked. Most of the servants did their jobs and pretty much ignored everyone. “Of course. What’s your name?”
“Livie, milady. Livie of the Moors.”
I nodded. I had no idea whether the “Moors” she was referring to was a patch of land in Annwn or a people, but she looked Elfin so I suspected the former. “What can I do for you?”
“Milady, when you have wed his lordship, you’ll be needing a lady’s maid, and I have been trained in that capacity. I’d be ever grateful if you’d consider me for the job. I wouldn’t be so forward to ask, except my family is expecting another child and it would be nice if I could give my mother some of my wages to help out.” She blushed, dipping her head. “I don’t mean to be forward—”
“No, it’s fine. I’ll talk to Herne. I’m not sure of the procedure here, so I can’t promise anything, but I’ll remember, Livie. And thank you, for even being interested.” I gave her a wide smile, realizing that my life was going to change in a number of ways that I hadn’t thought through. Being a goddess meant having servants, and given I was marrying the Lord of the Hunt, meant even more than that.
She took the tray and excused herself as I padded across the carpeted tapestry covering the chamber, over to the bathroom, which was behind a half-wall. I slipped into the water, closing my eyes as the warmth began to warm my bones. I was still chilled from our journey in Arianrhod’s land, and the palace, while beautiful, was drafty as hell. As I lathered up, humming aimlessly, Angel’s voice echoed through the room.
“Ember, are you here?”
“Come in. I’m over in the bath.” I realized this was a good chance to talk to her about what Morgana and I had discussed. We’d have to have the conversation at some point.
She peeked around the screen, then pulled a chair over next to the tub.
“Did you see your brother?”
A broad smile spread across her face. “He’s so tall, he’s growing so fast. We had a wonderful talk. As much as I hate to admit it, DJ’s in good hands with Cooper and his family, even with all that’s going on. He’s handling puberty as a shifter so much better than he would have living with me.”
“How does he feel about being here?” I asked, scrubbing at a mark on my arm till I realized it was a bruise and not dirt.
“He’s happy—he always wanted to visit Annwn, ever since I told him about it. But he doesn’t know that he’s here for good yet.” Her expression fell. “I do, however. I know in my gut that we’re here to stay.”
“Listen,” I said, scooting forward in the tub. “I have something to ask you. I can’t promise anything, but I have to ask you this or I’ll always regret it.”
She frowned. “What?”
“I talked to Morgana last night,” I said, trying to figure out the best way to phrase what I was about to ask. “How would you feel about…” I paused. How the hell was I going to put this?
“What? You sound afraid.” Angel frowned, a concerned look on her face.
I steeled myself and took a long breath, letting it out slowly. “How would you feel about undergoing the Gadawnoin and becoming a goddess, too?”
The look on her face told me she wasn’t expecting that. She stared at me for a moment, then began to sputter. “What the hell? I can’t become a goddess—I’m human! Well, mostly. And I’m not engaged to a god. How the… Have you talked to Morgana about this?”
I cleared my throat. “You don’t have to be engaged to a god to go through the ritual. And Morgana was one of the magic-born…and I think part human…before she ascended. She told me that she could call in some favors and perhaps make it happen, but that you had to agree to it before she tries.”
Angel looked troubled. “Why do you want me to do this?”
I hung my head. “You and I…we go back. We go back farther than this life. Morgana thinks so, and so do I, now that I’ve thought about it. We belong together. Oh, not romantically—I know you’re not geared that way and neither am I, but we have a soul-connection. I don’t want to lose that. And when I go through the ritual…”
A light dawned in her eyes. “Even though I’ve taken the potion to extend my life, I will never be immortal.”
“And I will, and because I will, we won’t be able to go around the Wheel again to come back together.” Without warning, I burst into tears. “Angel, we need each other. Maybe I’m clingy, but the day we met, even though we started out in a fight, it felt like we were already old friends, coming together after a long separation.”
She nodded. “I know what you mean. Is there someone we can ask about this? I’m curious now what our connections are.”
I stood up. “Hand me the towel, please.” As I dried off, she sorted through my wardrobe. Servants had put away all our clothes, and I had to figure out how everything was organized now.
“Here, this okay?” She held out a pair of jeans and a turtleneck. “It’s cold today.”
“That’s fine.” I slid into my clothes, then zipped up a pair of ankle boots. “Morgana’s still around, I think.” I paused. “Though I have no clue where to find her.”
“She was in the dining hall when I passed by.” She stared at me for a moment, then held out her arms. I hugged her. “You’ve been more of a sister to me than anyone I could ever imagine,” she whispered.
“And you…you saved my sanity,” I whispered back.
We headed into the hall, arm in arm.
Chapter Thirteen
The tree palace was bustling, with servants hurrying through the passages. The windows showed a winter wonderland. The cliché was the only phrase that really fit. We stared out over the sparkling snow that covered every surface. It was magical here, with the lightning flits reflecting off the glimmer of the snow, and it all aligned for a dazzling display that was almost too brilliant to look at.
“It wouldn’t be so bad, living here,” Angel said. “Not one person has given me a nasty look.”
“Why would they—” And then I stopped. Even in this day and age, back home there was always some fucknut spewing out racial slurs, and Angel was no stranger to being on the receiving end.
“I’m glad for that,” I said. “You know, it is beautiful here. I guess I’m a little like Raj. I’ll miss movies and TV, but there are so many things we could do here to replace them.”
“If they can figure out a way to use their cellphones here, they should be able to figure out a way to rig up a DVD player. We can ask,” Angel said, laughing. She threaded her arm through mine, and we walked arm in arm into the dining hall.
Morgana was sitting at one of the tables in the corner, alone. She was skimming over what looked like a report, and we approached quietly, waiting for her to notice us. It wasn’t polite to interrupt a goddess when she was busy.
After a moment, without looking up, she said, “Sit down. I’m running through some numbers here.” As we settled in, she waved toward one of the servants. “I assume you want coffee?”
“Yes!” I said.
Angel snorted. “Tea for me.”
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Examining the fish that my water boys caught last month.” She beamed at me. “They’re living up to my expectations.”
“Water boys? What’s a water boy?” Angel asked.
Morgana laughed. “Oh, that’s what I call my Meré. I have an entire city of them under my rule near my castle. The mermen provide fish for my subjects, and the women gather kelp and weave it into cloth for us.”
I hadn’t thought about anyone actually living in Morgana’s castle except for her priestesses. Now, it struck me that there was an entire world of people and lands and existences that I had never thought of.
“So, what can I do for you?” she asked, setting her reports aside.
“I told Angel…I talked to her…” I suddenly felt embarrassed, though I couldn’t say why.
“About becoming a goddess?” she said.
Angel nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t even know it was something that might be possible for me. I’m not sure what I think. But we also wanted to ask—do you know what our connection is? Ember and me?”
Morgana stared at us, then finally, she nodded. “I do. I know where you two began—or rather—where your relationship first began.”
“Can you tell us?” I asked.
“No,” she said, “but I can show you. If you truly want to know. Be aware—not all of it’s comfortable. Do you still want to know?”
I glanced at Angel and she nodded. I turned back to Morgana. “Yes, we do.”
“Then let’s return to your room,” she said to me. “Even here, some things are best talked about under the cover of privacy.”
We headed back to my rooms. I had a feeling we were at another crossroads—that this would effect yet another change in our lives that we’d never return from.
Angel and I settled comfortably on the bed, under a light blanket in case we got cold. Morgana was sitting next to us, in a rocking chair.
“Now, both of you drink the tincture I gave you and then lie back and close your eyes. You’ll relive a scene out of the first life you lived together, and you’ll understand then, how this all began. How you both began your connection. You’ve come down through life after life…always connecting when you most needed one another.”
I sniffed the tiny vial she had given me. It smelled like violets. After a hesitation, I upended it, swallowing the slightly pungent drops. Angel did the same. We lay back down, pulling the blanket up.
“Take each other’s hands, now. And hold on.”
I reached out for Angel’s hand. Her skin was soft in mine, dark against the paleness of my own skin. But we fit together—we were two sides of a puzzle, I thought. Then, quieting my mind, I closed my eyes and listened as Morgana began to weave her spell.
Round and round, time spins back,
To days long faded into the mists,
Follow now the fog-born track,
Into a time where magic kissed
The soil, and filled the air,
Where tricksters ruled and mayhem reigned,
Find yourselves, then come home again.
As her voice faded, everything felt like it was spinning. Like Dorothy heading to Oz, I felt as though I were being lifted out of the bed and, still holding Angel’s hand, we went catapulting through the air. In midair, Angel reached out for my other hand and we went spinning round and round like the blades of a windmill caught in a gale. As we flew, the land below us began to change and then, I grew very sleepy. I yawned and Angel followed suit. I closed my eyes and everything faded.
Ember:
I woke up, startling out of my sleep. At first, I couldn’t place where I was, but then I remembered. Alluete and I had decided to go fishing, and we had chosen the banks of the Dorwhistle River as our destination. We had eaten our lunch, and prepared our fishing rods and then…and then I couldn’t remember what had happened.
Groaning, I stood and looked around. I felt like I’d been given a sedative.
“Alluete? Are you around?” I wondered where she had gone to. There was no sign of her, and a chill raced up my back as I stared at the water. It was whitewater season and too many people had drowned here, trying to brave the water that rode high and fast with the early spring runoff. The whitecaps foamed and roared along. The river was good for fishing, but one misstep and it meant death.
I was used to water like this. I’d grown up along the shores of a lake that constantly churned, that was so big it might as well have been an ocean. Before we had come out, Alluete assured me that she was used to tromping through the woods and that she’d be careful. But she was human, and my mother had warned me about hanging out with humans. They were more fragile than we were, and they weren’t as connected with the elements.
“Alluete? Alluete? Where are you?” My worry increased as I stood up and looked around, trying to find her. Still no sign of her. Even her lunch had disappeared.
Frantic now, I was convinced she had somehow fallen into the river and got caught by the current. I hustled over to the banks of the massive waterway, watching as the water careened along, splashing against the edge, right at the top of its banks. Another warm day and the runoff from the mountains would send the river into flood stage, and it would cover the lower lands of the forest. Maybe fishing hadn’t been such a good idea.
Wondering what the hell I was going to do, I glanced farther down the river where a glint caught my eye. It looked like either something jeweled or metallic was caught in a natural beaver dam, about two hundred yards away. Alluete had been wearing a silver bracelet—could that be it? I debated less than a second. I couldn’t chance ignoring it. I had to find out.
I raced along the bank, terrified that she might be dead. What would I tell her family? They’d hold me responsible, because they didn’t like the fact that their only marriage-eligible daughter was hanging out with the grubby Fae girl from the wrong side of the market. In fact, her parents didn’t want anything to do with the Fae, but they begrudgingly let their daughter spend time with me because she fancied having a Fae friend and what Alluete wanted, Alluete got.
As for me, I knew that her family begrudgingly bought all their honey and mead for their store from my mother, because ours were the best bees in the land, and my mother was adept with brewing. We were dependent on their customers for a living. My father was dead, and my oldest brother was a drunk, so it was up to me to help as best as I could.
I reached the edge of the beaver dam, immediately scouting for a branch that was long enough and sturdy enough to act as a walking stick.
The dam was massive, stretching halfway across the river, and I wondered how many beavers lived in the lodge, which was probably built into the side of the banks. The water swirled in back of it, diverting to the right. It bubbled around the opening, cascading through with a roar that drowned out most other sounds.
The glint had been coming from near the end of the dam, halfway across the river, so I cautiously began to pick my way over the branches and rocks, using the walking stick to balance myself. At one point, the rocks and sticks shifted under my feet and if it weren’t for my stick, I would have tumbled into the river.
I froze, shaking. I could swim, but even the best swimmers couldn’t face these currents during whitewater season. Taking a deep breath, I started on again.
As I reached the endpoint, near the halfway mark in the river, I caught sight of the glint again, in the water right behind the dam. Kneeling to see what it was, a wave of relief slid over me when I saw that it was a bucket. For a moment, I wondered if it might be Alluete’s lunch bucket, so I fished it out and peeked inside. The bucket had a rusty bottom, with a few holes in it. Alluete’s lunch bucket had been new and clean. So much for it being a clue to where she was.
Tossing the bucket aside, I started to turn, to head back to shore.
“Silly, what are you doing out on the beaver dam?”
Startled, I whirled around. Alluete was standing on the shore, bucket in hand, laughing at me. I tried to catch my balance but the branch sli
pped out of my hand and I spread my arms, trying to hold myself steady. The sticks and rocks on the end of the beaver dam chose that moment to slide, and I went tumbling into the churning current.
I screamed as the water sucked me down, and I tried to kick my way to the surface. As I came up for air, the rush of water carried me over the mini-falls that the beavers had created and tumbled me along, over the rocks. I screamed again, trying to propel myself toward the opposite shore—but I couldn’t fight the rapids.
For the first time, I realized I might actually die. I could only struggle so long before the cold of the water and the fatigue of my muscles would overwhelm me. Thinking of my mother and my home, I began to cry, and tried to relax, tried to let the water keep me afloat as I careened down the river.
Angel:
She woke from her long sleep. Something was wrong—something was terribly wrong. A wave of fear washed through her, propelling her out of her slumber. As she shook her head, looking around, she saw that it was midday, and she rose out of her lair by the side of the river, squinting in the sun. The light beat down with a steady glow and Myris stretched and yawned, basking for a moment in the warmth. Then, curious as to what had brought her out of her long sleep, the naiad sat on the edge of the river as she scanned the waterway.
Myris closed her eyes, focusing on the fear that raced through the water. It was caught in the waves and bubbles, churning in the whitecaps that frothed at the edges of the current. Then she pinpointed the emotion—tumbling through the water from upstream. As she probed further, she caught sight of a young woman caught in the river’s rush to the sea.
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