by Ann Macela
“Yes, in a way. The pictures over the mantel are actually plates from a very large eighteenth-century book.”
“Who’s the artist for these? The initials are … ‘J.M.’ … Wait a minute.” He pivoted to look at her. “Did you paint these? They’re wonderful.”
“Thanks. It’s my hobby and helps keep me sane. Can’t think about students or teaching or practitioner politics or problems—only about matching the colors, picking the right brush, drawing the best line.” Praying that she wasn’t blushing, Johanna concentrated on stirring the big casserole dish with the mushrooms, zucchini, tomatoes, onions, black olives, and shrimp simmering in olive oil, herbs, and a touch of cayenne pepper.
“If you have the talent for such beautiful art, why are you teaching kids to be Defenders and Swords and not concentrating on your paintings?”
“Let’s talk about that later,” she suggested while she spooned up a couple of pieces of penne pasta and held them out to him. “Here, tell me if it’s done.”
He put a piece in his mouth and chewed. “Perfect.”
“Great. You get the salad out of the fridge—dressings are in the door—and move the wine to the table.” She drained the pasta, stirred it into the shrimp mix, and carried the casserole to the table. French bread and parmesan cheese completed the meal.
Neither said a word other than, “Pass the cheese,” until their plates were filled and they had their first tastes.
“Mmmmm, good,” Saxt said. “Just right for a cold winter night.”
One constant about practitioners and food, Johanna mused over her next several bites. Energy replenishment always took precedence over talk for a few minutes.
Saxt, however, was not distracted for very long from his previous question. He reached for another piece of bread and said, “Tell me about your painting.”
“I’ve been in love with art and drawing and painting as long as I can remember. I originally planned to become an art teacher. While I love art, my primary talents are for teaching, not for actually making art. When Billy died—you know I lost my soul mate, don’t you?”
“Yes, I read about the teaching and security reforms because of that tragedy.”
“After that, I decided to teach others, especially Swords and Defenders, about magic and do my best to make sure no other student ever made his mistakes.” She sighed, battling memories both past and present. “I thought I was doing really well, fulfilling my primary goal, actually getting through to students about the need for safety—and all of a sudden this mess with Chuck exploded.”
“Uh-uh.” Saxt waggled his fork at her and shook his head. “You did nothing wrong. Remove that thought from your mind. You couldn’t have foreseen or even been aware of the Ogden family dynamic or Bellman’s activities. I can guarantee that.”
He helped himself to more salad as he continued, “My work on the Council and Committee has taught me that people who should know better still make weird and dangerous decisions. Despite the protocols, the classes, the workshops, the discussions, the available counseling. We’ve had problems with individuals that came as a complete surprise to all of us. The Ogdens are a perfect example. To prevent these problems, we’ve been investigating early detection methods, even considering a psychological evaluation for Swords. You can imagine how that subject was received.”
“Yes, like a spell gone wrong—no matter what you do, it still leaves a stink in the air.” Johanna squinched up her nose. “I’m leaving the adults to you. My students give me enough trouble. With regards to Chuck in particular and bullies in general, I hope I know what to watch out for now to see that it never happens again.” They were wasting time on too gloomy a subject, she decided, so she asked, “Speaking of the Council, what did our visitors think of our process?”
Saxt laughed. “Oh, they loved it, once they relaxed into the flow. Three more arrived today—two of them highly skeptical. Until I escaped to join you and Ben, I spent the day in one pentagon after another, spinning rings. Thank God Clyde and a couple of masters were helping, or I’d be there still. After convincing a middle-aged Defender to settle down enough to let the damn wheel revolve, it was a pleasure to sit and play with energy with a brand new Sword.”
“Wasn’t Ben’s mother a surprise?” Johanna asked. “I never knew Karol Schutz had such talents. From what he’d told me earlier, I figured she’d be able to monitor his energy paths and output. Most mothers can for the first three years after their child becomes a Sword, and it’s such a help for a novice to have support at home. Ben hadn’t said a word, however, about her outstanding ability to manipulate lightballs. He’s probably seen it all his life and takes it for granted. She’s only a level seven.”
“That’s all?” Saxt asked. “When she produced that blue lightball, then sent ocean waves rolling across it, then pushed a volcano out of the ocean, and changed that into an island with a couple of palm trees … the sound you heard was my jaw hitting the floor. That wasn’t simple illusion.”
“If you noticed, my puny star disappeared pretty quickly,” Johanna said. “I made an appointment with her to teach me how she does it.”
“Good. Show me when you find out.”
They discussed the new ring method and teaching magic in general for the remainder of the pasta and salad. After Saxt helped clear the table, Johanna made coffee and brought out the pie and ice cream.
“What’s next for you and the measurement test?” Johanna asked while she cut into the pie. “Will Herb and Gary be staying on? I’m worried about the disruption to our regular classes.”
“Jake, the Council members, and I discussed it, but didn’t have time to come to long-term conclusions, except that the next two weeks will be crazy. I’m dedicated to the project right now, and I’ll stay at the center to run it.” He smiled slowly and gave her one of those looks. “Which means, we’ll have some time to spend together.”
Yes, it was definitely time to discuss the major reason for his being here. Since she was no coward, she’d approach the subject head on. She gazed into his brown eyes and watched them darken as he smiled—he knew what she was going to say. “You recognized the possible soul-mate connection the first time we spun the ring, didn’t you?”
“Yes. It hit me in my center and nearly knocked me over. Every cell in me said you’re my mate.” He paused, frowned. “You didn’t have the same reaction, though.”
“No. I was terribly confused and more than a little shaken. I couldn’t imagine what might have caused so much inner … turmoil. I didn’t realize what was going on until three the next morning when a dream told me and woke me up.”
“I’ve had a couple of dreams like that lately myself,” he said with a grin that made him even more attractive, if that was possible. “What made you decide the imperative was at work?”
“Research.” Despite the effects of his concentrated gaze and killer smile, she gathered her wits and explained her discoveries in the online practitioner library. She closed with, “I don’t remember anyone—my parents, my counselors, teaching masters—ever mentioning that I might find a second mate. Did you know it was possible?”
He gazed into the distance for a long moment before shaking his head. “No one ever told me in so many words either. The possibility does make logical sense, of course. When I saw you across the ring, I had no doubts. I have no doubts now. Our connection was certain, is certain.”
“You’re absolutely, positively convinced we’re mates.” She made it a statement, not a question.
“Yes. My attraction to you, my arousal in your presence, my pleasure being with you, my desire to know all your facets, all that and more. I believe my implicit and instinctive trust in you brought me into the first ring. That thunderbolt of awareness and recognition during the spinning can have no other reason for being. I’m a text-book case for what is supposed to happen to a man ‘under the influence.’ I haven’t felt this way about any other woman since Maddy.” He leaned forward, but didn’t touch her. “Do
you have doubts?”
“Not … doubts, really. I’m feeling the attraction, the pleasure, the arousal the same as you. Very strong, very powerful. It’s just …” She knew she was still holding back, not allowing herself to wallow in the sensations, especially not to consider that her present feelings might be as strong as—or, God help her, stronger than—those with Billy. She had to work that out by herself, not under Saxt’s potent influence.
Therefore, she equivocated. “The idea I could have another soul mate is exciting. More than that. Astounding. After all these years to have a mate? How miraculous. It’s also frightening, though. Is it real? I don’t want to rush to conclusions, raise our hopes, and have it fall apart because we’re not reading our reactions correctly. My research said widows could have lovers, the same way that widowers can. What if it’s simply normal human attraction that might fall apart later? Not be the guarantee of the soul-mate bond?”
“The possibilities scare me, too,” Saxt said. “By nature, I’m optimistic, in both my business dealings and my life. I wouldn’t have agreed to lead the measurement test if I weren’t looking for new opportunities. Hah! I never expected one like this.” He smiled, one of delight, before he turned serious. “I have to believe we can work through our fears and any problems, discover the true nature of our attraction as long as we use a reasoned approach, are open with each other, and don’t give up. Are you with me?”
“Yes,” she answered. What choice did she have? Deny the possibility and be lonely the rest of her life? Or grab the opportunity and make the most of it? The latter was definitely preferable.
Saxt held out his hand, and she put hers into it. He immediately curled his fingers to capture hers. Warmth spread, especially when he rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand. Her hand tingled, almost as if magic energy was moving through it.
Johanna refused to succumb to his touch. That was too easy. Not totally convincing. What was wrong? She felt in her bones he was—or they were—missing an important aspect or detail or sequence. Unfortunately, even though she wracked her brain furiously for several moments, no answer popped up.
Finally, she said, “You need to understand me—and I need to understand myself, which I’m not sure I do at the moment. Despite the research, despite the feelings the imperative seems to be generating, or maybe because I’m older now, maybe because of other factors I don’t know about yet, I’m simply reluctant to accept the idea blindly and plunge in, like I did when I was a teenager.”
“All right, I can understand that,” he said, “but I’m the type who works on ways to make all parties to a deal happy with the outcome. Let’s say what we’re feeling is the real phenomenon, not some hormonal spike. Are you determined to reject the idea, ignore the imperative?”
“No, I’m not foolish,” Johanna answered. “I’m aware of what the imperative does to people who fight it. I’m aware of the benefits of being a soul mate. I’m keeping an open mind and trying to think everything through. It’s been a pleasant experience—more than pleasant. I’d like to keep it that way.”
In fact, she wanted so badly to know absolutely, even if she was afraid of the answer. She couldn’t admit to him her real fears about losing Billy in the process, however. Not yet.
“What would help you decide?” Saxt asked.
She looked at their clasped hands. The tingle was still present, like latent energy waiting to be used. “What convinced you?”
He stood and drew her up with him. “Let’s try a ring.”
Chapter Twelve
“Here? Now?” Cast a ring? Johanna’s mind spun at the suggestion.
“Yes. Here and now. We have room for a very small, very personal circle.” Saxt pulled her into the space about six feet wide between the table and entrance to the dining room. “When I looked across the original ring, and when our energy grew and our threads met and wrapped around each other, I knew without a doubt we’re soul mates.”
“But …” He was rushing her, and she didn’t like it much. What he said made sense, even if a tiny part of her was hesitant to stand in that pentagon with only him. God, was she becoming a coward?
“I could be wrong, however,” Saxt said. “With both rings, we were in the middle of a crowd of people, with an evil item in front of us and a job to do. Energy was everywhere, and we were all sharing power, even if not in a soul-mate way. Let’s see what happens here, when we’re alone. We may discover we’re not ‘under the influence’ at all.”
“Generating a ring does make some sense as a way to see if the compatibility is real,” Johanna conceded, although she knew in her heart of hearts Saxt was correct and she was fighting a force she could not defeat.
She threw all her worries out of her head. She refused to be a coward. Her magic center was hopping gleefully, definitely in favor of the experiment. Besides, what could it hurt? Wasn’t it better to know for sure?
Well, as sure as you could be without taking the final irrevocable, yes-you’re-soul-mates step—making love. She certainly wasn’t ready to put the idea to that test. Being in a ring together wouldn’t bond them for life. What did she have to fear? “All right, let’s try one.”
They cast a small pentagon that let them stand about three feet apart. Saxt gave the signal, and both held out their hands to send energy threads from their fingertips. Within seconds, a glowing, three-inch-thick rope formed and connected into a ring a foot-and-a-half in diameter.
When they started the ring spinning, its energy level escalated from tenth to fifteenth, silver with violet streaks, in a heartbeat. Johanna glanced at Saxt. “What happened? Do you feel that rapid acceleration?”
“Yeah. It’s probably because we’re both fifteens and don’t have any lower levels in the ring to slow it down. Let’s see how much we can throw into it, how high a level the spinning can attain.”
Johanna supplied more power, and her energy well grew warm and larger, and … “My center is humming.”
“So is mine.”
The violet vanished, leaving only silver—which didn’t last long as golden threads began to interweave with it.
“Ah, here comes the ebb and flow,” he said. “We’re up to level seventeen.”
The ring spun faster, glowed brighter. The gold grew until it definitely predominated. Level-eighteen power rushed in and out of her center.
Wary of looking directly at Saxt because of the effect a visual link had on her thought processes, Johanna kept her focus on the wheel. Finally, when the colors settled into gold with only a few silver streaks, almost nearly level nineteen, she raised her eyes.
And gasped when their gazes met and held. She could almost feel her pupils dilating, despite the bright light of the ring. His eyes darkened until only a rim of golden brown remained.
In that singular moment, only the man and the spinning, glowing ring existed. The pentagon, her house, the city, the whole planet, all faded from awareness. She could be floating at the bottom of the ocean, she could be standing on top of a mountain, she could be in outer space.
She vaguely knew that her hands, stretching along its circular axis, spread to grasp the ring. Energy waves flowed back and forth through them and in and out of her well, much more powerfully than when she used only the tips of her fingers.
At first she could distinguish the energy she generated from that he created, but as the threads wove together, the power …
Fused. Became theirs.
And its strength grew, and its intensity magnified.
And engulfed her entire being.
She was floating. She was flying. She was somewhere out in the universe. She was right here with Saxt.
His power was hers. Her energy was his.
The ring turned pure gold.
Extraordinary, astonishing enchantment swirled in Johanna’s body, down her arteries, up her veins, through her center—and lodged in her heart. Excitement and arousal followed in its wake. She’d never experienced an exchange remotely like this before. Not amon
g the team. Not even with Billy in the act of mating. She trembled before the potency and possibilities it offered.
“Push,” Saxt murmured. “Push on the ring to compact it.”
She pushed and felt the hoop decrease in diameter. The flow, contrary to her expectations, increased. Her heartbeat and breathing shot up to correspond, to match the in-and-out of the throbbing exchange.
She pushed. When their fingertips met along the sides of the wheel, even greater power surged through her.
And surged again when they compressed what was now a small sphere until they could intertwine their fingers.
The orb disappeared when they brought their palms together. No sound, only an abrupt lessening of the light. Between them, however, the flow continued.
Raw, powerful, enthralling, compelling.
Sexual.
Their gaze into each other’s eyes had been unwavering—she’d been able to see nothing else. Suddenly his entire face came into focus for her.
Saxt’s expression was stark, his skin taut across his cheekbones, his eyes gleaming, as he slipped his fingers from hers, drew her hands up, and placed them on his chest at collar level. He cupped his own hands on her shoulders before sliding them around and down her back.
As he pulled her into his heat, he lowered his head, and she rose on tiptoe to meet him in a kiss.
A kiss that began softly, a brush across lips, a light caress, a small opening of the mouth to let the tongue come out to taste.
A kiss that became an exploration, changed to ravenous in a flash, then a plundering.
Johanna raised her hands to run her fingers through his hair, measure the width of his shoulders, hold him closer, and closer still.
She heard herself whimper, then moan.
She heard him groan, then growl.
Their centers aligned, and more elemental power rushed between them.
Parts of her swelled, ached. In hopes of lessening the pleasant discomfort, she pressed her breasts against his chest. She sighed. Oh, that felt better.
A part of him swelled, too, and when she shifted her hips even closer, he grunted and splayed his hand across her bottom, holding her still, but very tight against him. Their hums merged, resonated between them.