by Jacki James
“Damn, baby, I want to do the right thing here, but you don’t make it easy. You’re the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.”
He leaned back, looking at me with that fuck me look of his, and I knew I was in trouble. “So,” he said as he grinned. “You want to do the right thing, do you? Well, I think the right thing to do is me. And I say you come do me right now.” He poked the tip of his tongue out and slowly ran it along his lips, and then bit his lower lip and winked at me.
He started to lean back in for another kiss, but I put my hand on his chest stopping him. “Just hold on a minute and let me look at you.” I started with his face and slowly let my eyes drift down taking in his beautiful body. “You know this is the first time I’ve ever seen you without a shirt on.” I took my finger and lightly traced his abs. “My god, you’re magnificent.” I ran my hand up his torso and brushed his left nipple. It immediately pebbled and he shivered.
“Lexi, sweetie,” he groaned as he rubbed his hard dick against mine. “We need to either stop and watch a movie, or you need to fuck me because I can’t take any more of you touching me.”
If anyone else had called me Lexi, I would’ve told them to shut the fuck up, but coming out of that beautiful mouth, it just sounded right. I leaned down and licked one nipple and he moaned. “Okay.” I said sitting back up. “What movie do you want to watch?”
He glared at me for a second, and then shook his head and chuckled. “Something gruesome and scary to help get rid of this raging hard on, you evil, evil man.” He handed me the remote, told me to find something that was a ‘boner killer’, and headed into the kitchen for drinks and snacks. I found a good horror flick and stretched out on the couch. When he came back, he stared at me for a minute, then shrugged and crawled up on the couch with me.
Watching a horror movie was hilarious with him. He yelled at the people not to be stupid, when a scary part came, he covered his eyes but peeked through his fingers, and when something caught him off guard, he jumped and squeaked. It was the most fun I’d had watching a movie in ages. Eventually, he got settled laying on top of me using my chest as a furry pillow, and that’s how Lincoln found us sleeping hours later.
Chapter Eleven
Nathan
Before I knew it, September had flown by. Alex and I had been dating for over a month and so far, it was great. It was National Preparedness month, so Alex was busy going to schools and other community places to give talks about being ready for disasters. We’d still managed to squeeze in dates a couple times a week, and it had been fun.
We had gone to the roller derby which had been amazing. We had played Cards Against Humanity with Mark, Justin, Suzie, and Tom and that had been the most fun I’d had in ages. I couldn’t remember when I last laughed so hard. We’d also done typical date stuff, like movies and dinner, and those had been fun too.
He’d asked me to meet him for lunch a couple times at work, but I’d insisted on keeping things separate. He said he didn’t care who at work knew which I appreciated, but it mattered to me. I knew at some point I was going to have to tell him about Trevor and why I was so weird about the work thing, but I hated to talk about that asshole.
At first, I was really unsure about the no sex thing. There was a part of me that still wondered if maybe he just didn’t really want me, but when I’d catch myself thinking that, I’d remember some of our fantastic make-out sessions. Nope, no doubt about it, the man wanted me.
I knew the point Alex was trying to make was that we could have fun while getting to know each other without having sex. He was right, of course, and to be honest, it had been kind of nice. However, I wanted the man like crazy. I hoped we were getting close to ready to take things to the next level. I just wasn’t sure exactly what Alex was looking for to decide it was time. Honestly, I wasn’t sure he knew. But the no sex rule was his, not mine, so I was leaving it up to him. I just made sure he knew I was ready when he was and tried to be patient. Okay, not really. I had many virtues, but patience wasn’t one of them.
I was off this week on Monday and Tuesday, and it was my turn to plan a date. So after Alex got off work, I dragged him to the park to play disc golf. It was obviously not his thing, but he seemed to have fun anyway. Next was ice cream because, well… ice cream.
“I have no idea how you eat that,” he said making a disgusted face.
“It’s the best. Unlike you and your plain vanilla, I like a little color in my ice cream.”
“I don’t care what color it is. It’s bubble gum flavor and that’s just disgusting,” he said with a shiver. “Plus, there isn’t anything wrong with vanilla… when it comes to ice cream anyway.” He waggled his eyebrows at me and I cracked up.
“Oh honey, no worries. I’m pretty sure vanilla isn’t on the menu.” I winked and leaned over and kissed him.
“Hmmm, you taste like bubble gum.”
“I thought it was disgusting,” I laughed.
“Maybe I better taste again just to be sure,” he said as he pulled me closer and kissed me again. We heard a throat clear and looked up to see a woman with her kids at the ice cream stand looking at us. “We should probably head back. You make me forget we’re in public.”
“Yeah,” I agreed. “I need a shower anyway; I’m all sweaty from playing.”
“How about if I drop you at your house, and then head home to get cleaned up? I can grab takeout, come back, and we can figure out what to do with the rest of our evening.”
“Sounds perfect.”
Alex
I dropped Nathan off and headed home to get cleaned up. I was planning to bring up the idea of taking our relationship to the next level tonight, and I hoped it wasn’t a mistake. I thought we were ready. I knew I was. Jerking off in the shower just wasn’t cutting it anymore. I felt like Nathan had gotten comfortable with the idea that I wanted him, Nathan Davenport, the whole man. He was more than just the caregiver at work, or the sexy twink when he was out. When you combined his parts, he was perfect.
I took a shower and called in some Chinese to pick up on my way over. I didn’t tell him, but I had taken tomorrow off. If he agreed to my plan, I would need to be free during work hours.
He opened the door before I was able to knock.
“I was watching for you,” he said with a quick kiss. “I figured your hands would be full with the food.”
“I got a variety because I couldn’t decide.” I also got enough for lunch tomorrow, but I hadn’t discussed that with him yet.
We got comfortable on the couch. He flipped through the channels while I checked Netflix on my phone for something to watch.
“Look! Jaws is on. I love that movie!” he exclaimed. “Want to watch it?”
I really loved the movie, but as excited as he was, even if I hated it, I would have agreed. “Sure. I’m gonna grab a beer. Do you want anything?”
“Grab me a Coke if you don’t mind,” he called after me.
I returned with our drinks, and we ate while we watched.
“That makes me glad we aren’t near the ocean,” I commented. “You realize if that happened here, sorting this shit out would be my job. I mean, they wouldn’t expect me to get on a boat and hunt the fucker down but coordinating it and everything would be.”
“Well, we’ll never move near the ocean then because that sounds stressful,” he said.
“I like it here in Austin and don’t plan to move anywhere. I say we stay put,” I told him while watching to see if he freaked out about the fact that we were talking about the future.
He put his empty plate down on the table, slid over, and curled up against me. “I like it here, too. It’s close enough to our families, and there isn’t anything I like to do that isn’t within a day’s drive. I don’t see any reason to move. I love the hospital here, and it’s the state capitol so there is no reason to ever transfer you anywhere else, is there?”
I reached over and pulled him into my lap. He had no way of knowing what he had just done to my heart. I
loved that he was sexy, and while it was true that most of my fantasies revolved around his ass, my biggest fantasy was this right here. Us, sitting here together eating Chinese food, watching old movies, and talking about the future.
“There’s something I want to talk to you about.” I figured now was a good a time as any.
“What?” he asked sounding a little worried.
“I’ve been thinking about this a lot. First of all, I want to clarify that I am not, nor do I want to see anyone but you. I need to know if you feel the same way.”
“You mean seeing anyone else, like, fucking anyone else?” It was obvious he was irritated. “Why would I want to see anyone else? Just because I like to dance and flirt doesn’t mean I cheat or that I’m a slut or…”
I put my hand over his mouth. “Shhh. Calm down.” He glared at me and god, he was adorable. “I’m not saying you have or would. I’m just trying to make sure we’re on the same page. We never actually said we were exclusive, and I just wanted to say it out loud so there weren’t any questions about what we each expected.”
“Okay,” he huffed. “I assumed we were, but I guess it’s better to say it out loud than to assume something like that.”
“Yeah it is. But now that we’ve cleared that up, and we agree it’s only going to be us, I have a request. If you agree, I mean. If you don’t want to, that’s okay, too.” I was nervous because I didn’t want to push him. And I could be nervous for nothing, this might not be as big a deal for him as it was for me. He had no way of knowing that this symbolized so much more to me than just a physical act; this meant commitment to me. I’d always said that I wouldn’t do this unless I trusted the other person completely.
“Lexi,” he prodded. “What is it?”
I took a breath and said it, “I was thinking that maybe tomorrow we could go get tested so we didn’t need condoms. I swear, Nathan, I never go bareback, but all I can think about is sliding into you for the first time with nothing between us.”
He stared at me not saying a word. “I mean, we don’t have to. If the Navy taught me anything it was to cover up, so it isn’t a big deal if we use condoms,” I backtracked.
He spun around on my lap so he was facing me and locked eyes with me. He stared at me for a second. “You would really trust me like that?” he whispered.
“Well, yeah Nathan, I trust you. Why, do you not trust me?” I wasn’t sure what he was getting at.
“Of course, I trust you silly. It’s me; I’m the one.” He sighed and tried to get his thoughts together, and I waited for him to figure out what he wanted to say. “I have a reputation. I’m not as slutty as people think, but I've been with a lot of guys. People always assume that I won’t be happy with one guy because… well, because I've said I wouldn’t for ages. And I don’t know anyone, except maybe Lincoln who would believe me if I said I wouldn’t sleep around.”
“That’s because they don’t know you, baby. I know that if you tell me you won’t cheat, then you won't cheat. I can’t speak for what, or who, you did in the past, but I would bet money you never cheated on anyone or led anyone to believe they were the only one if they weren’t.”
“Of course not. I would never. It’s just that I didn’t expect you to trust me like that.”
“Well, I do, so what do you think about my idea?
“I just have one question. If I agree to the test, does that mean we finally get to have sex? Because sugar, having your dick in my ass is all I can think about.”
I laughed “Baby, regardless of you agreeing to the test, we’re going to have sex. I’ve waited as long as I can. You’re all I can think about. Touching you, feeling you, fucking you. Damn, I want you.”
“Thank god. I thought my balls were going to fall off. But yeah, we can go get tested. I've never gone bareback, but I trust you, Alex.” He kissed me softly, but that wasn’t what I wanted. I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck and pulled him against me deepening the kiss.
“Okay, I’m going to head home. I need to stop at the store on the way. I will pick you up tomorrow morning first thing. The clinic opens at nine so let’s be there then. After we’re finished there, I have a surprise for you.”
“Really?” he asked, eyes lighting up. “I love surprises. What is it?”
“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, but you’ll like it, I promise. Oh, you are off this weekend, aren’t you?”
“I am. What do you have in mind?”
“I thought it’d be fun to take a day trip on Sunday to the National Forest to see the fall foliage. It’s my favorite time of year. Maybe next year we can take a week off and go to Virginia or somewhere, but for this year, East Texas will have to do.”
“That does sound like fun.”
Chapter Twelve
Nathan
I woke up early the next morning to get ready for Alex to pick me up. I felt surprisingly well rested. I didn’t expect to sleep last night, but I did. After Alex had gone home, I was strung tight. I decided my best bet was yoga. Turning on my yoga playlist, I did the routine I used for relaxation. I focused on the poses and the music and by the time I was done, I was relaxed and able to sleep.
I had never gone bare with anyone. Patty had been a teenager in the early eighties and grew up in the height of the AIDS crisis, so she had hammered safe sex into our heads. For me, this meant more than a different sexual experience. For me, going bare meant we were saying this was real. Without even thinking about it, I picked up the phone and dialed. It only rang a couple times before Patty picked up.
“Nathan, sweetie, how are you?”
“I’m fine, Patty, how about you?”
“Good. Same old, same old. You know how it goes up here, but you didn’t call me to ask how I am, did you? What’s up?”
I chuckled at how well she knew me before I blurted, “I’m seeing someone new, and I wanted to tell you about him.”
“Oh! Let me grab a cup of coffee and go out on the deck. While I do that, tell me how work is going. Are you still liking the switch to the emergency room?”
I heard her starting up her one cup coffee maker. The deck had always been the talking place when we were teenagers. Something would happen and she would say Grab a cup of coffee and join me on the deck. It was comforting to know some things never changed. I regaled her with stories about the ER until she told me she was situated and ready to listen.
“Oh, baby boy, I miss you. I know you love living in Austin, and I’m glad you do, but I miss our early morning chats.” After a deep sigh, she said, “Now tell me about this guy you’re seeing.”
I’d never had any secrets from Patty. From the day she came and got me at my parents’ house, through her sitting beside me in court as she and Mike were declared my legal guardians, to the debacle with Trevor, I’d always told her everything. She was my strongest cheerleader but also, the one person I could count on to tell me the truth, even if I didn’t want to hear it. So I did what came naturally, I told her everything.
I started with seeing Alex around the hospital, and then how he hurt his shoulder, right on through to his pursuit but refusal to sleep with me. I told her about our fun dates and some of our more serious talks. Other than occasionally asking a question for clarification, she just listened. Finally, I got to the end and told her about him wanting us to be tested. She was silent for long enough that I was a little worried.
“Oh, sweetie,” she said, and it sounded like she was crying.
“Patty, are you okay? Are you crying?”
She sniffled a bit. “No, of course not. I don’t cry.”
“Seriously?” I was pretty sure she could feel my sardonic look and raised eyebrow from two hours away.
“Fine, so maybe sometimes. Only at commercials and songs and movies. But not at real life stuff, and this is real life stuff,” she clarified and then she took a deep breath. “Okay, I’ve pulled myself together. It’s just that this is what I’ve wanted for you for so long. It’s no secret I never
liked Trevor, but after all that mess, I wasn’t sure if you’d ever let anyone in enough to see the real you.”
“I never let Trevor see the real me. With him, I was always trying to be someone better,” I said quietly.
“I know that, baby boy. That’s one of the reasons I didn’t like him. Because he made you feel like you needed to be someone better when you were already one of the best men I knew.”
“Alex doesn’t make me feel that way at all.”
“I can tell. Do you love him?”
I stopped and thought about her question for a minute. I wanted to say no, that it was too soon or that I didn’t believe in love. But neither of these were true.
“I do and it scares me to death.”
“It scares us all at first,” she chuckled. “But it’s worth it.”
“I’ll hold you to that when he breaks my heart, and I come home crying.”
“You can always come home, sweetie, you know that. But I have a good feeling about this one. You should bring him home for Thanksgiving so we can meet him.”
“I’ll ask him, but he might have plans with his family already.”
“Well, he’s welcome to come. And baby boy, we love you and you are enough.”
“I love you guys too, Patty. I’m going to go before Linc makes it home and gives me shit for needing to call mommy,” I laughed.
“Well, you tell my other son that I said to stuff it, and it wouldn’t hurt him to call home more often himself. Keep me posted about Thanksgiving.”
I hung up and once again thanked my lucky stars for the day the Patty Reynolds chose me to be part of their family.
Alex
I pulled into Nathan’s place right at eight thirty. I was excited about today and hoped it went well. I was never good at pulling off surprises, but with Linc’s help, I thought this one was going to work.