Vance rejoined us nearly twenty minutes later. Jillian had ducked into Gary’s Grocery to buy herself one of her iced soy latte drinks and a large Coke Zero for me. Vance found us, standing outside my Jeep, entertaining a long line of corgi admirers.
“Vance!” I called, as the detective pushed his way through the small crowd of people. “Tell me you got him.”
Vance nodded, “He’s been apprehended, but I wasn’t the one who got him.”
Curiosity piqued, I looked over at Jillian, who shrugged. “Okay, I’ll bite. Who was responsible?”
“Your ardent admirer, Clara,” Vance chuckled.
“Clara Hanson caught him?” Jillian incredulously asked. “How is that even possible? She’s nothing but a little old lady!”
“She’s a little old lady who damn near ran him over with her Prius,” Vance clarified. “To be fair, Clara thought Jerod was Ash. She told me she’s been looking for him all day. Since she hadn’t heard from him, she automatically assumed he was stiffing her.”
I covered my ears. “Poor choice of words, buddy.”
Vance chuckled, and then looked down at the two dogs. He smiled, and without another word, turned on his heel to walk into Gary’s Grocery. Five minutes later, he was back, holding two large bags of doggie biscuits. He broke the seal on one bag and offered each corgi a biscuit.
“I’m a man of my word, guys. Here. You earned it. I’ll make sure your daddy doesn’t try to stiff you for the rest.”
EPILOGUE
“Just remember, you guys said you could make this thing, as strange as it may sound.”
“If we have it, then we’ll make it,” the teenage girl vowed. “What’ll you have, Mr. Samuelson?”
“They know you by name?” I asked, amazed. I looked at the girl and hooked a thumb at my friend. “How many times has he been here?”
“Enough to know what his family likes and dislikes,” the girl confided. “Although, this one is new.”
Vance enthusiastically rubbed his hands together. “Okay, let’s get started. We’ll get the normal ones out of the way first. Now, I need a large Hawaiian, thin crust.”
The girl tapped away on her ordering screen.
“One medium Canadian bacon, mushroom, and olives,” Vance continued, as he grinned at Tori, who nodded her thanks. The detective looked at his two girls and was ready to invite them to order their favorite when Tori suddenly frowned.
“Choose wisely,” their mother ordered.
Victoria, the oldest, sighed. Luckily, Tori turned back to Jillian and continued their conversation. I looked at the young teenager and winked at her.
“What’s your favorite?” I whispered.
“Ham and salami,” Victoria whispered back.
“And you?” I asked, looking at the younger daughter.
“That works, but add extra ham,” Tiffany quietly instructed.
I looked at Victoria, who nodded her approval.
“One medium ham and salami, with extra ham.”
Our teenage waitress nodded and entered the order. She looked up, expectantly, as if to see if there were any more additions. I nodded, as I looked over at Jillian. I knew what her favorite was, and if I played my cards right, I could kill two birds with one stone.
I hastily pulled out the small notebook I had begun to get into a habit of carrying, scribbled down an order, and passed it to Victoria.
“Order that. That should make your mom happy.”
Victoria read the note and then grinned, “Umm, okay. I’d like a medium vegetarian, with extra mushrooms, no olives, and no onions. Is this for Ms. Cooper?”
I nodded, knowingly tapped the side of my head, and then reclaimed my notebook.
“We’ll take a large combination,” another voice announced.
“No, we won’t,” a female voice contradicted. “We’ll have two salad bars, please.”
The waitress nodded, “You got it. Will there be anything else?”
Vance nodded, “Just one more. I’d like a small tomato, Tabasco, and peanut butter pizza, please. No cheese. Thank you.”
Both of Vance’s daughters wrinkled their noses with disgust. I couldn’t blame them. That sounded absolutely terrible.
“Where the hell, er, heck did you ever come up with that combination?”
Tiffany held out her hand. Sighing, I handed over a dollar bill for their swear jar.
“It just came to me one night. Thought it might be good, and damned if it wasn’t. You should try it.”
“Not a chance in hell, pal.”
A young hand appeared before me. Rolling my eyes, I handed Vance’s youngest daughter another dollar. And who does he think he’s fooling? Tabasco, tomatoes, and peanut butter? On a pizza? Gross!
We were (obviously) at a pizza parlor, celebrating Vance’s official 40th birthday. The whole gang was here: Tori and the kids, me and Jillian, and Harry and Julie. Five days have gone by, since Jerod’s capture. It was all anyone in the town could talk about. That, and my ‘heroic’ act of saving Ash’s life. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I truly think anyone would have done that, had they been in my position.
We found out the following day that, coming as a surprise to no one, the Daredevils had been disbanded. Thor had informed us that he could have kept the club open, only that his heart wasn’t in it anymore. He couldn’t seem to shake the terrible deaths that had occurred, and even though we tried to tell him none of it was his fault, Dean Babcock didn’t want to be responsible for anyone’s life ever again. That’s when Yeti stepped forward and said he’d like to take over the club, but start it from scratch. New motto, new outlook, and a new name: The PV Hot Shots. The first thing he did was badger me and Vance relentlessly to join up. Apparently, saving a person’s life, while in the middle of a free fall, was held in high esteem with adrenaline clubs.
We were in the midst of going through the list of Yeti’s proposed excursions when a familiar face appeared at our table. Looks like our friend, Marshal Binson, had finally been discharged from the hospital. His beard was staring to grow back in, he looked several pounds lighter, and definitely walked with care, but for the most part, he looked good.
“Hey there, amigo!” I exclaimed, as I jumped to my feet. “Pull up a chair and join us. We were just waiting for the pizza to come out.”
“I do like this place,” Ash admitted, as he slowly pulled a chair from the next table over to ours. “How is everyone doing tonight?”
“I’m officially 40,” Vance reported, “and do you know what? I’m completely fine with it. I have my health, my family, and my career. I don’t need anything more than that.”
“Good for you,” Ash said, and I could tell he meant it.
“Zack”, Ash said, as he turned to me, “I haven’t had a chance to thank you.”
“For...?” I asked.
“For saving my life, obviously. I don’t know why you decided to help me out in the middle of a jump, but I’m sure as hell glad you did.”
“Any idea when they plan on taking Jerod back to Texas?” Jillian asked.
“They’ve already left,” Ash told us. He checked his watch. “As a matter of fact, they should be there by now.”
“Driving?” I asked.
Jerod shook his head, “No, sir. They chartered a private jet. They would only fly him, and they weren’t about to put him on a commercial airline. The Marshal Service wasn’t going to waste any time this time around.”
“Didn’t you want to do it?” I asked.
“No. I’m no longer a marshal.”
“They canned you, bro?” Harry asked. “It wasn’t your fault we were all drugged, man.”
“I know that. They know that. However, it’s what I wanted. I tendered my resignation as soon as I was able to pick up a phone. I’m just not cut out for the marshal service.”
“What will you do?” Tori asked.
“I’m going to return to Virginia,” Ash informed us. “That’s where my family is. It’s best if I find some
thing else to do. With that, I’ll take my leave.”
Our young waitress appeared at our table, closely followed by two other servers. A series of pizzas were placed in front of us. Our night culminated with the arrival of Vance’s god-awful, hot peanut butter goopy pizza. Our entire table fell silent as we stared at the pizza with the red and brown goo on it. Jillian snatched a napkin out of the dispenser and held it over her nose. Figuring it was a good idea, I did the same.
“Good God, man,” Ash exclaimed, as he rose from his chair. “What piece of roadkill had to sacrifice its life in order to make that?”
Vance grinned and helped himself to the first slice. “Mmmm, this is really good, guys. Would anyone like to try some? Guys?”
When Vance finally looked up from his plate, he was surprised to see everyone had abandoned his table and had joined mine. The smell was so bad we even had to pull our tables apart.
Vance shrugged. “Suit yourself. More for me.”
As I sat there, and watched one of my friends eat slice after slice of the nastiest-looking pizza I had ever seen, I couldn’t help but consider myself lucky. I had a strong circle of friends. I was engaged to a wonderful woman, and I was owner of two adorable dogs who have proven they are still smarter than me. I’d say life was good, but in less than 72 hours, I was going to receive a phone call that would shake PV to its core: one of the town’s most well-known residents was going to be brutally murdered, and once more, I was going to be blamed!
THE END
Zack and the corgis will be back, in
Case of the Abandoned Bones,
available 8/31/20 as a pre-order wherever most books are sold!
AUTHOR’S NOTE
What should have taken only a month or two to write ended up taking four. I shouldn’t be making excuses, and I apologize for that, but I did have a few things on my plate that were unexpected. For starters, we moved yet again. I tell you, I am damn tired of moving. However, this was one well worth it. Plus… this was essentially a double move. We finally moved back into a house, and since it was large enough for all our stuff, we were able to pull all our things out of storage back in Lake Havasu and bring them here.
Yay. More boxes to unload. **sigh**
Many of you will be wondering just what happened to the Dragons of Andela. Well, I’m still working on it. But, seeing how I can release a mystery much faster than an epic fantasy, and especially since the new fantasy is still being developed, my wife suggested I get a couple of CCF titles out of the way. That way, I could focus an extra month or two on completing my new fantasy novel and not be able to release a title for months on end.
With that being said, Case of the Abandoned Bones has been started, and will be released this summer! Keep an eye on the blog for all the latest details.
Thanks for reading, everyone! If you enjoyed the novel, please consider leaving a review for it wherever you purchased your copy. It would be greatly appreciated!
J.
June, 2020.
Case of the Dysfunctional Daredevils Page 19