That weird buzz of electricity swirls around the table, and I wonder if he feels it too.
“Dude, I think I’ve finally found a girl immune to your charms,” Luc jokes.
I almost pee my pants at the irony.
“Is that so?” Ryder’s question is laced with amusement.
Slowly, I raise my eyes, roaming my gaze over his slim hips, washboard abs, broad chest, and wide shoulders and up to that delectable face. A face that belongs on a big screen where he can be adored by the masses. His lips kick up as my gaze wanders over his face, finally meeting his beautiful eyes. My heart goes crazy again, and my stomach lurches wildly as butterflies invade my chest. Hot damn. He’s even more gorgeous up close. He is truly beautiful.
Ryder grins, pulling out a chair beside Luc. Sitting down, he leans back in his chair, casually crossing one leg over the other. “Yeah, I’m not buying that.”
“Wow. Are you always this arrogant?” Heat spreads up my chest and onto my neck, and I will my stupid body to get with the program before he notices my crazy attraction to him.
“Do you always lie to yourself?” he coolly replies.
“Never,” I snap. “I never lie to myself. Not when there are enough people in the world who do that for me.”
I regret the words the instant they leave my mouth, but it’s too late to reclaim them without drawing even more attention.
Ryder straightens up in his chair, all trace of humor gone from his face and his tone when he speaks. He stares at me for a minute, and I’m holding my breath in nervous anticipation. “I can relate to that. Respect that.”
We continue to stare at one another, and something intangible passes between us. My heart rate kicks up, going a hundred miles an hour, as I struggle to decipher what the hell this thing is between us. He jerks back a little, a strange look on his face. Quickly composing himself, he extends his hand across the table. “I’m Ryder, by the way.”
I eye his hand warily. Firstly, who does that? Secondly, I’m afraid I might spontaneously combust if we touch, skin to skin. Guess I won’t know till I try. With more confidence than I feel, I clasp my hand in his, startled when a jolt of electricity whips up my arm. His palm is large, his fingers callused, but his grip is firm and warm, and I briefly wonder what it would feel like being held in his arms. I jerk my hand away the instant the thought lands in my wonky brain.
“Sorry.” His face is flushed, and he looks a little … embarrassed?
“For what?” I inquire, my brow puckering in confusion. Is he apologizing for shaking my hand?
“For my, ah … for”—he scrubs a hand over the light layer of stubble on his face, his features twisting—“my hands are rough because of the guitar,” he hastily adds. Luc bursts out laughing, almost choking over the food in his mouth. Ryder pins him with a “shut it” look.
“You play guitar?” I ask, instantly intrigued and also wanting to put this conversation back on some kind of normal footing.
He nods. “Since I was a kid.”
“You any good?”
“He’s fucking awesome,” Luc confirms, grinning proudly.
I frown, not understanding. “Did you two know each other on the outside?”
Luc shakes his head. “Nah. Ryder was already here when I arrived.”
I scratch the back of my head. “So how do you know he’s an awesome guitar player?”
Luc shoots me a duh look, while Ryder answers my question. “Powell got approval to have my guitar brought here.”
“I didn’t think we were allowed to have anything from home.”
“We’re not, but Ryder’s been here a while, he’s got level four privileges, and I think Powell’s got the hots for him.” Luc winks, grinning.
Ryder’s face contorts. “Knock that shit off. She’s old enough to be my mother.” A scowl mars his perfect features as a dark look briefly flits across his face, but it’s gone so fast I’m not sure I didn’t imagine it. “And I think I just puked in my mouth,” he adds, smiling.
I can’t help sniggering, and Ryder’s head swivels to me, a wide grin covering his mouth. “I’m not into older chicks.” He leans across the table. “Unless you tell me you’re older, and then I’m completely reassessing my stance.”
Woah. Talk about direct. Is this the same guy who was stuttering and stammering a few minutes ago? He’s a bit of a conundrum. Flirty one second and then shy the next. I can’t get a good read on Ryder, which is unusual for me, and that only adds to his allure.
“I’m sixteen,” I readily admit. “Almost seventeen.”
“Then my statement, and my position, remains unchanged.” He waggles his brows at me before diving into his breakfast.
“So, you’re seventeen,” I surmise.
“Yes,” he confirms, “but I could be older. Not everyone is transferred to an adult facility when they turn eighteen.”
I had heard that, but I wasn’t sure how true it was. I make a mental note to ask my attorney about it at her next visit.
“Will you be?” I blurt, forgetting to engage my brain again. I don’t usually flirt with guys, but Ryder is getting under my skin, making me say things I don’t normally say.
He arches a brow. “Why, would you miss me?”
“I’d have to know you to miss you,” I retort, sending him a smug look.
“Well, we can rectify that. You only have to say the word.”
“Dude.” Luc chuckles, nudging Ryder’s shoulder. “You’ve got game.”
Ryder rolls his eyes, messing up the younger boy’s hair. “Watch and learn, my young apprentice,” he teases, and now it’s my turn to roll my eyes.
“How old are you, Luc, and how long have you been here?” I ask, deliberately changing the subject.
“I’m fourteen, and almost two years.” His mouth turns down, and I hate that I’ve put that sad look on his face.
Ryder shoots me a look which I instantly interpret as don’t pry. I subtly nod at him, and his gaze radiates gratitude.
“So, when do I get to hear you play?” I plant an overly cheery smile on my face while I divert the course of the conversation again.
“Are you free after school?” he teases with a playful smile.
“Hmm.” I tap a finger off my chin, pretending to think about it. “Let me consider my busy schedule for a moment.” Luc chuckles, and I’m glad he’s broken free of his nostalgia. “Yep. I’m free.”
“It’s a date,” Luc quips, jumping in before Ryder can respond.
And as my eyes are drawn to Ryder’s once again, I can’t help wishing that it was.
CHAPTER 3
Ryder
I can’t stop thinking about Zeta, and as the class enters the small school library, I find myself gravitating to her side. She stiffens, almost imperceptibly, as I walk up behind her. A second later, her shoulders relax, but she doesn’t look around. I reach over her head, selecting the book I want to read. I watch her scanning the shelves, her eyes zooming in as her fingers skim over spines, while most of our classmates mindlessly grab any book before heading back to the classroom. “That one’s good,” I say when she pulls out the worn blue book I’ve read cover to cover at least five times. “Once you don’t mind depressive subject matter.”
She glances over her shoulder at me, raising one brow, before returning to the book, reading the back cover. “I’m surprised they permit books like this,” she says, a couple minutes later, turning to face me.
I shrug. “I think it helps that the material is relatable. Reading about a guy suffering from depression and suicidal tendencies might actually help put shit into perspective.”
Her gorgeous eyes drill into mine, like she’s hearing the things I’m not saying, and it makes me hugely uncomfortable. I shift on my feet, averting my gaze, pretending to read the back of the book in my hand, even though I’ve already read that one too. The li
brary is small, and I’ve been here too long, so there isn’t anything I haven’t already read.
I was never a reader until I came to juvie, but I’ll do just about anything to help pass the time and keep my mind occupied, and I’ve actually grown to enjoy it.
A couple of tense minutes pass before she clears her throat, and I whip my head up. “I don’t usually read books like this, but maybe I’ll give it a try.”
“What kind of books do you normally read?” I lean against the bookshelf. We’re alone in here now, and I want to take advantage of the quiet time.
Her cheeks flush a little, and now I’m even more curious. “Usually contemporary romance,” she admits after a beat.
“Hey, nothing wrong with that. I liked The Fault in Our Stars.”
Her lips kick up at the corners. “You seriously read The Fault in Our Stars?”
“And Everything Everything and We Were Liars,” I add, freely handing over my man card. A beautiful smile graces her mouth, and a strange fucking ache stabs me in the chest. I lean in closer to her because I’m inexplicably drawn to her and I can’t stop myself. Lowering my voice, I whisper in her ear. “But you’ll have to keep my secret. I’ve a rep to maintain.” I wink at her without thinking, and she bursts out laughing.
“Oh my God. Did you seriously just wink at me?”
I straighten up, rubbing a hand along the back of my neck, slanting her a sheepish look. “Too lame?”
Her smile expands, and this girl could ask me to do anything in this moment, and I would be powerless to resist. “Pervy, more like.”
I fake a wince. “Ouch.”
“I bet you do that to all the girls,” she teases.
“What, all five of you?”
Her smile drops off. “I’d kinda forgotten…” She clasps the book to her chest, looking off into space.
“It’s natural. I can still remember how hard the adjustment was at the start.” It’s a tough environment to get used to in some ways; in others, not so much.
Tucking her hair behind one ear, she chews on the corner of her mouth as her brow creases. I watch a multitude of emotions wash over her face before she finds the courage to ask me. “How long have you been here?”
I wipe my suddenly clammy hands down the front of my shorts. “A while.” My answer is purposely vague. I don’t want to give anyone any reason to start joining the dots.
“Oh.” She peers intently into my eyes, sucking me deeper into her world. “I guess people don’t really like to talk about it,” she adds in a quieter tone. “How long and why they’re here.”
“It’s not something we dwell on unless you’re like Lopez or part of one of the crews. They like to brag about shit they’ve done.”
“But not you.” She astutely assesses me.
“No. Not me.”
The teach pops his head in the doorway. “Williams, Stone, back to your desks now.”
We walk toward the door, and at the last second, I tug on her elbow, holding her back. She flinches, jumping a little, and I instantly withdraw my hand. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you,” I mumble, inwardly cursing myself. I’m such a fucking doofus around this girl. It’s embarrassing.
“It’s okay.” She worries her lower lip between her teeth. “I just don’t like people touching me.” She looks away the minute she says it, and I can tell she had no intention of telling me that. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one blurting stuff out. Perhaps she’s as affected by me as I am by her.
“No touching. Got it.” I hold my palms up, keeping my tone light.
“Thanks,” she mumbles, stepping forward.
“You wanna have lunch with me?” I hurriedly ask before it’s too late.
Her smile is coy as she looks back at me. “Sure. And you should ask Luc to sit with us too. I know you watch out for him.”
My eyes pop wide. How can she tell that after one day in the place?
“I’m very observant,” she says, answering my unspoken question, shocking me again.
Zeta is the type of person I should avoid like the plague, but she’s far too interesting to ignore. She’s the first girl I’ve ever felt a connection to, and even if it’s risky, there’s no way in hell I can stay away from her.
“So, how’d you end up with a name like Zeta?” I ask as we finish our dinner in the cafeteria later that day. Young is hanging off Zeta’s every word, and I can tell he’s majorly crushing on her. Not that I blame him or can even pretend like I’m not crushing hard either. Lopez has been sending me snide looks the entire day, and I know it’s cause he’s not happy I’m hanging out with the new girl. Well, screw him. He doesn’t get to tell me who I can speak to or spend time with.
Her body turns rigid, and I figure I’ve hit a sore point, but I don’t retract my question either.
She sighs a little, consciously dragging a hand through her hair. “My mom was a big fan of the actress Catherine Zeta Jones. She named me after her.”
I remember watching The Mask of Zorro a few years ago in here, and that’s how I know who she is. The facility’s movie collection is completed outdated and all rated PG-13, but I’ve just found a reason to be happy about that fact.
She toys with the food on her plate before looking up with a forced smile plastered on her face. “I guess I should count myself lucky that she didn’t name me Catherine.”
“Or Jones,” Luc blurts, his cheeks reddening when he realizes how lame that sounds.
“Absolutely,” Zeta agrees, easing his discomfort.
“Your mom chose well,” I admit, shoving my empty plate aside. “You even look a little like her.”
She blinks excessively before shaking her head. “Eh, yeah, no, I don’t.”
“What does Catherine Zeta Jones look like?” Luc asks me.
She’s beautiful. I think it, but I don’t say it because I don’t want to embarrass Zeta. Or myself. “She’s got long, dark hair, and she’s really pretty,” I say, hoping that doesn’t sound too flirty.
“Don’t insult my girl,” Lopez says, sticking his ugly mug in my face. He winks at Zeta before dropping into the seat beside her, slinging his arm around her shoulder. “Zeta’s smoking hot.” He licks his lips as he checks her out, his gaze gravitating to her tits.
She pales, sitting up stiffly in her chair. Removing his arm, she glares at him. “Don’t fucking touch me.”
“I second that,” Valeria sneers, standing with her hands on her hips and glaring at Lopez.
His gaze bounces between both girls, and a sly grin spreads across his mouth as he slouches in the chair, casually crossing his ankles. “If you came over here to tell me what to do, you can fuck the hell off, bitch.” Lopez’s grin turns menacing as he pins his fuck buddy with a withering stare.
She leans over him, her wavy black hair falling around her shoulders, gripping his chin and putting her face right up in his. “You can suck your own dick next time, asshole.”
“Yeah?” Lopez knocks her hand away, grabs her ass, and yanks her down onto his lap. “I don’t fucking think so. If I tell you to suck my cock, you’ll suck my cock.” He turns his head to Zeta. “Or I’ll find a replacement.” His intent is clear.
Valeria throws back her head, laughing, as she slides off Lopez’s lap. I see her noticing Powell watching from the far corner of the room. “You think that bitch gives head like me?” Her hands are firmly back on her hips. “Puh-lease. She’d probably faint if you showed her your cock.”
I know what Valeria’s suggesting, but Lopez, given his giant-sized ego, interprets it differently. “That’s more like it, baby,” he purrs, thinking she’s just complimented the size of his dick.
Zeta has remained quiet this whole time, but as she stands, I watch her preparing to say her piece. “I’m betting I’ve seen more cock than you’ve had hot dinners,” she challenges, eyeballing Valeria l
ike butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. Young is practically drooling as he hangs off every word Zeta says.
“And I’m betting you’re full of shit,” Valeria retorts with a smirk.
“I think there’s an easy way to resolve this,” Lopez butts in, rubbing his crotch as his gaze latches onto Zeta’s chest. He’s grinning like he’s just won the lottery, and I want to smash his face into the wall. Rivulets of rage start trickling through me, and I grip the side of my chair, grinding my teeth hard.
“I wouldn’t touch your cock if you paid me,” Zeta supplies. “And I don’t have to prove anything to any of you.”
Powell moves from her position, heading this way. It’s clear from the body language that something is going down, and she’s ready to head it off at the pass.
“That’s not the way things work around here.” Valeria prods a bony finger in Zeta’s chest. “And you can’t disrespect my boy like that. Someone needs to teach you some manners.”
Zeta snorts. “And you think that’s you?”
I rise, hoping the movement will catch her attention. I’m trying to caution Zeta with my eyes, but she’s solely focused on the girl in front of her. I’m not sure what Zeta hopes to achieve by antagonizing Valeria and Lopez, but she’s treading on shaky ground.
“I will fucking gut you, girl,” Valeria threatens.
“Not if I gut you first.” Zeta’s voice is like ice as she holds firm. Thrusting Valeria’s finger away, she squares up to her, leaning right into her face as she says, “Just like I did with my momma.”
CHAPTER 4
Zeta
I hate myself for what I’ve just admitted, but I can’t let that bitch gain the upper hand. Although I’m shaking inside, I hold my chin up, fixing her with a deadly stare. I can do this. I can act like nothing or no one affects me until she gets the message that I’m not about to be pushed around. Then, hopefully, she’ll get bored and leave me alone.
“What’s going on here?” Powell asks, materializing at our table.
“Your girl here says she’s gonna gut me like she did her momma,” Valeria confirms, with a look of disbelief splashed across her face. “Why is she here? She do that?”
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