by Liz Schulte
“Hold up,” Baker called. I turned back toward him and he stared at me with a contemplative expression. “Something must be bad wrong with you, doll. But the boss-man said to help and that’s what I’m going to do.” He looked back at the old woman. “What’s eating you, Toinette?”
“You brought all that hate and rage into my office, Baker McGovern. I have half a mind to curse you too.”
I shook my head. “I’m not angry.”
“Not you, child. The person who did this to you. You’re wrapped like a mummy in powerful curses. I want no part of it.”
Cheney no longer looked amused. “Curses? What kind of curses?”
“The worst kind.” Antoinette’s unseeing gaze fluttered in my direction. “I feel death, strife, struggle digging their way inside. It won’t stop until her heart is as black as the magic that did this.”
I shook my head. She wasn’t right. The only spells that were cast on me were by my grandmother and coven. They were spells of protection and to help me remember. “No. You’re wrong. Look, I just want to break the bond with Cheney. Can you tell me how to do that?”
She came toward me and took my hand again. I didn’t know how she knew exactly where I was, but she did. After a moment, she spoke. “I wouldn’t remove that bond for all the riches in the world. It’s the only thing keeping you from falling to the darkness. It’s your lifeline and even it is weakening.”
“Cheney?” I looked at him. He was the only one who knew why we bonded.
He shook his head. “You weren’t cursed that I know of. She wasn’t cursed.”
“Why did you come if you aren’t going to listen? The girl is a danger to all those around her.”
I took a deep breath. “I’ll listen. Please tell me what you know.”
She looked through me and nodded once. “Baker, you and the Erlking wait outside.”
“I’m not leaving,” Cheney said.
“I’ll be okay,” I told him, and Baker ushered him out of the room.
“Have a seat, child.” Another metal chair appeared in front of her chair. We both sat and she took both of my hands. “This is old magic, older than I have felt on a living person. To withstand it, you must be strong. Now tell Toinette. Why did you come here to break the bond with the elf king?”
I bit my lip. “It’s confusing me. I don’t know what I feel or think. I can’t remember my past very well, but the more I think I know about it, the more confused I get.”
“Does it hurt to remember? Cause you pain?”
I nodded.
She shook her head. “Nodding to a blind woman.” Her hands moved up my face. “The curse is holding back the memories. It has the power to kill you if you continue to pluck at them.”
My mind went back to my conversation with Grandma. What if Cheney was wrong? What if I had killed my parents? Maybe I then cursed myself to keep me from harming anyone else. I could have given my memories to Jaron so I wouldn’t lose them completely but bound the power inside of me so I could do no harm. “It’s a curse, not a binding. Are you sure about that?”
“This is no binding. It is made from anger and resentment. Strong. I don’t know if I can break it, but if you can rid yourself of it, I can undo the bond on the harvest moon.”
“That’s less than two weeks.”
“Don’t quote me the time when you do not have it to waste. If you don’t end the curse by the moon you will be lost anyway.”
“How do I break it?”
“Everything comes with a cost. Are you willing to pay it?”
“What is it?”
“That will be revealed in time. Will you pay it?”
As if I had a choice. It wasn’t like I could get a second opinion. The facts were there. I didn’t have a memory I could trust. And no matter what I wanted to believe, darkness was surrounding me and hurting those I loved. “I will.”
She picked out a handful of items that looked like trash to me, stuffed them into a little burlap bag, and pulled the string tight. “Find the person who cursed you. Soak this in their blood, then in yours, and cast it into a fire made from wood of an ash tree and sage. Make sure you have it right, child. You only have one chance.”
“Thank you.”
She nodded. “If you succeed, we will meet again.”
“And if I don’t?”
Her lips pursed. “Then pray for death.”
“Death?” Sy wiped the rag over the bar for the hundredth time.
“That’s what she said.”
“We’ll break the curse and rescue your friend.”
“But how am I going to know who did it? Even if I get the rest of my memories from Jaron, who’s to say I even knew that I was cursed or that the memories are correct. What if they’re tainted by this curse? There are already inconsistencies.”
Sy poured us each a shot. “You’re right. It’s impossible. We should give up.” He clinked our glasses together and tossed back his drink.
“That’s not what I’m saying,” I said, toying with the little glass instead of drinking it. “Do you think I killed my parents?”
He shook his head. “There has to be another explanation. My guess is whoever killed your human parents is also the person who killed Michael and took Devin. Chances are that’s also the person who put this curse on you. Someone has a serious hate on for you, coz.”
“But who? And why?”
“Well, I think we can rule out Cheney. Doing anything that might kill you after you two bonded would be dumb. So who’s left? We have his father. Obviously he hates you.”
“Cheney says he couldn’t possibly be doing this, but he also hasn’t told me where he’s being held.”
“And there’s Sebastian. Your spell led to him.”
“I have a hard time believing Sebastian is behind any of this. He seems to really like my friends, and he’s been so nice to me. What reason could he have for hating me and wanting me dead? He knows it would kill Cheney too.”
“Maybe that is the reason. Maybe Sebastian is making a play for the crown and he’s using you to do it. There’s no reason why his house couldn’t rule just as easily or as well as Cheney’s. Is Sebastian really as loyal as he seems?”
“And there’s Jaron,” I said, though my mind was still on Sebastian and Sy’s interesting point. “Obviously he is involved somehow.”
“He did lie about when he got the memories. Are you going to get the rest from him?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I have this feeling that if I do, I will be choosing Jaron over Cheney.”
“If it is the only way to find out, then maybe it’s worth it. Save your friend and yourself. Then worry about the guys.”
“There might be another way. If I can remember on my own …” I stood up and stretched. “But I don’t have to decide anything tonight. I’m going to bed. Tomorrow, I’ll make Cheney tell me what he knows and talk to Sebastian.”
“Goodnight. I’ll let you know if I hear anything from Femi, Holden, or Olivia.”
I started for the back. “Sy.” He looked over at me. “If someone is targeting me, it’s only a matter of time before they come after you too.”
He smiled. “They’ll need a hell of a lot more than luck to get to me.”
I shook my head. “Watch your back.”
“Why? What happened?”
I whirled around to see Jaron standing in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”
He gave me a half smile. “You keep canceling. Believe it or not, this isn’t fun for me.”
I swallowed. “I’m sorry. I have a lot going on.”
Jaron closed the distance between us, and while it appeared Sy was minding his own business, I knew he was watching every move Jaron made. “Which is why I asked what happened.”
“My friend Michael was killed and another friend of mine was taken.”
He nodded. “Why?”
“I wish I knew. You have any ideas?”
“Maybe. Let’s talk.” He nodded toward t
he back room.
I led the way back, tired and not wanting to do this.
“Have I done something to make you mad?”
“No. I’m sorry. I’m tired.” We sat in our usual spots. “When did I give you my memories?”
He paused. “Just before you became a changeling.”
Still lying. Why? “And why did I become a changeling?”
“You know the answer to that.”
“It doesn’t make sense. I feel like all of this must be connected, but I can’t see how.”
He shrugged. “I’d look at the king. Cheney may have hidden him away somewhere, but he has loyal followers who will do whatever they can to help get rid of you. Maybe it’s someone closer to you than you think.”
“I’m pretty sure it’s not Cheney.”
“Perhaps not—but he does have the same advisor as his father though.”
Everything in me stilled. “Sebastian was the king’s advisor, too?”
“Don’t you remember?”
I shook my head, and he frowned. “Odd.”
Yes, I thought. Very odd. Very odd indeed.
After looking in all the usual places for Cheney, I headed to gym on the off chance he was planning on meeting me there, even though I didn’t have Sebastian to train me anymore. I found him gracefully pacing on the balance beam, his hair unruly and eyes wild. His head snapped up. “You’re late.” He hopped down and came toward me with long strides. “Did you have any trouble this morning?”
“No. I was here on time. I didn’t know where you were.”
He ran his hand vigorously through his hair. “I wish you stayed last night.”
“I needed to talk to Sy. He’s probably a target too, so I wanted to warn him and tell him everything that happened.”
Cheney took me by both shoulders and gazed down with earnest eyes. “I don’t care if you have to move every person you have ever known in here. I want you where I can get to you.”
“You’ll never get Sy here. He’s attached to the bar.” I touched Cheney’s cheek, and he released his breath. “But thank you for the offer.” I went over to the mats and sat down. “Now tell me what you know.”
Cheney sat in front of me. “Are you sure it’s a good idea?”
“Damn it, Cheney, you promised.”
“I don’t care about you remembering it. I don’t want to spark another memory. The woman last night said they could kill you.”
“Would you rather I go to Jaron?” He frowned and looked down. I waited a moment, but I wasn’t feeling particularly patient. “Cheney?”
“I’m considering,” he said.
I leaned back, resting my hands on the floor behind me.
“Fine. I’ll tell you. You went to see my father without me knowing about it, but luckily Sebastian saw you before you met with him.”
The room felt like it was spinning, but I didn’t mention it. I didn’t want Cheney to stop. I needed to know.
“He tried to talk you out of seeing the king, but you insisted. You said you had information for him, something he had to know.”
The room went black, starting at the edges, then fading in. Cheney’s voice sounded hollow and far, far away.
I walked through the doors like I belonged there, ignoring the fact that the king hated me. I was vaguely familiar with the castle from the few times Cheney had brought me there. The king wasn’t in the great room, so I went through the door to the private chambers where I promptly ran into Sebastian.
His eyebrows pulled together. “Selene? What are you doing here?”He grabbed me by the arm and pulled me toward the door. “Does Cheney know you’re here?”
“This has nothing to do with Cheney. I need to see the Erlking. Where is he? I have information he needs, Sebastian.”
Sebastian tilted his head and a knowing look spread over his face. “Don’t do this. You chose Jaron and that’s fine. We’ll manage. Don’t try to insert yourself again. You will only hurt Cheney.” Concern filled his eyes.
“It’s not what you think. I’m protecting Cheney. Jaron isn’t who you think he is. He doesn’t care about our cause, Sebastian. You can’t trust him.” My eyes filled with tears. Everything I had believed was tainted. I was disillusioned, but I couldn’t stop now. I had to make things right.
Sebastian nodded. “I believe you, but you still cannot see the king. He will imprison you, Selene.”
“That’s absurd.” I pulled out of his grasp and headed down the hallway with Sebastian hot on my heels. I opened the first door I heard talking behind, Sebastian’s fingers just missing catching the back of my dress.
The Erlking looked over from his finely crafted leather chair, and my father’s eyes turned to me from the chair across from him.
I steeled my spine. The speech I had practiced a thousand times in my head was nowhere to be found. “I-uh-I’m leaving.” The king looked at me as if I’d lost my mind. I clenched my fists and tried to force out the words I wanted to say. “After today I will no longer be a part of the fae community. I was born a half-elf and lived in the shadows of your kingdom all of my life. I once naively thought if my father met me, he could love me, but you would never allow that. I thought if I could win the love of your son, you would have to see me and my kind as more than inferior, but you hated us more for my effort. I thought if I could speak to you, I could make you hear, but your ears are deaf to my voice. I cannot change your mind and I no longer have it in my heart to fight against you so I am leaving.
“But I cannot leave things as they are. I may have been part of the revolution, but I never wanted this. You and Cheney are both in danger—” I was about to tell him they had to stop Jaron, but the king interrupted me.
“That was a fine speech, Selene, but do you know what else it was?”
My eyes met his.
“Treason. And treason is punishable by death. However, death is far too lenient for you. You are sentenced to the pit where you can think about your crimes.”
I turned to flee—Sebastian was right. I shouldn’t have come—but two guards took me by the arms. I struggled and yanked away from them, but they were unfazed. I bit one and was met with a firm fist in my kidney. I unleashed energy and waited for the room to shake and crumble around us, but at the first tremor, the guard smashed something hard against the back of my head.
When I awoke, the room was blacker than black. Even my sensitive eyes couldn’t pick up enough light to give me any sort of bearings. It could have been the size of a closet or the size of a stadium for all I knew. I felt my way to the wall and waited. Sebastian knew I was in here, he had to. He wouldn’t let me rot down here.
Days, months, perhaps years passed. I had no concept of time. No one spoke to me, and I never saw any light. I was beaten and brutalized in every possible manner. Time blurred together in misery. I quickly discovered my magic was worse than useless. The room was warded and the door was made of solid iron. Any chance of escaping on my own was gone. I couldn’t even protect myself from the guards. I ran over all the mistakes I’d made in my life, all the choices I should have made differently. But eventually even my regret gave way. I had nothing. I was locked away, forgotten in a dark, empty room with no contact other than to receive pain and nothing but my thoughts, rats, and whoever came down to my cell to fight off. My mind weakened and cracked until Selene died and only anger existed. I no longer cared why Jaron was doing it. He was right. The king had to die.
Hands gripped my shoulders and pulled me off the floor and out of my own squalor. I fought like a wild animal, the animal the king had turned me into, and I hated him. That was the only piece of me left—a burning, consuming rage toward the Erlking. He would die, and he would die by my hands. I clawed and growled at the person trying to take me from my cell as if I could get to the king through him. My fingernails sank deep into his flesh, but still he said nothing. What new, horrible punishment had the king dreamed up this time? A hand covered my mouth and I bit at it, but it only pressed tighter as I was
carried from my dark seclusion. The night sky seemed so bright that my eyes watered, and I squeezed my eyelids shut. I didn’t want to see the moon if it would be taken away from me again.
A moment later I was released. My legs gave out and I landed in a heap on the floor. I tried to see where I was, but the light was too bright. Tears streamed from my eyes. I curled into a ball. A soft hand brushed my hair back from my face. “It’s okay,” the familiar voice whispered. “I have you. You’re okay.”
The following days were a blur. As long as no one touched me, I lay on the couch quietly, drifting in and out of consciousness. Bits of conversations drifted into my thoughts.
“You want to bond with her? Cheney, have you lost your mind?”
“It’s the only way. It will bring Selene back.”
“She left you.”
“She came back, Sebastian.”
“She won’t even let you touch her. How do you plan on bonding with her?”
“She’s getting better. Watch.” A hand ran down my cheek. I flinched away but didn’t attack him.
“This is a waste of time.” Hands grabbed me and jerked up. My eyes opened, no longer sensitive to the light. My fists beat against the man with short brown hair and silvery skin. “Are you mad, Selene? Good and mad,” he yelled in my face as I hit him.
“Then fight back. Save yourself.” Sebastian took a swing at me and I blocked him, parts of my mind slipping back into place. “No one can break you unless you let them.”
“I’ll kill him,” I growled, lunging for a sword.
“No, you don’t.” Cheney wrapped an arm around my waist, holding me back.
“Let. Go.”
Sebastian stepped in front of me. “This isn’t the way, Selene.”
They spent hours talking at me. Cheney tried to convince me to bond with him and Sebastian argued against it. I didn’t care what they said. I knew exactly what I was going to do. I wasn’t going to hurt Cheney, but the King had to go. I considered telling Cheney what I knew about Jaron, but I didn’t do it. It would only strengthen the King’s position, and I had Cheney where I needed him. I knew what I had to do. It was the only way to fix this.