by Annie Dalton
I thought I was going to fall apart right there in Guru.
Lola quickly put her hand over mine. “Is it too soon to talk about it?”
“A bit,” I gulped, fighting tears.
Heavenly hip-hop music exploded from my friend’s jacket. She pulled out her phone, beaming when she saw the caller ID. “Do you mind, babe?”
“Course not. Say ‘hi’ to your bad boy from me.”
A LOT of water has flowed under the bridge since I first met Brice, Lola’s cosmic drop-out boyfriend, in wartime London. When the school took him back on probation, I didn’t trust that angel boy an INCH! I’m happy to tell you he has since proved me totally and utterly wrong.
As it happened, we’d both been in my old human neighbourhood working on different, but, as it turned out, totally cosmically-related missions. Brice was going to be there for another few days, tying up loose ends.
To give the lovebirds some privacy, I checked my mobile for text messages. Lola and I seem fated to end up with identical phones! Lollie had acquired this new Omni-Era XL22 while I was away. The Agency lent me the same model for my mission and to my delight, (the Omni-Era XL has zillions of spangly functions!) Sam said I could keep it.
After Lola finished her call, we quickly drained our smoothies and set off back to school.
“I meant to tell you, Amber had her upgrade while you were away.” Lola was half-giggling before she’d even got her story out. “She’s telling everyone she’s only wearing pure white from now on. Says it’ll make it easier to radiate cosmic light throughout the Universe!”
My jaw dropped. “White all over? Even her shoes?”
“She doesn’t believe in shoes these days either!” Lola explained. “They block the light flow, according to Amber. She’s all bare feet and tinkly ankle bracelets now! I’d keep out of her way, actually, she’s looking for angel girls to join a bizarre group she’s starting, called Sisters of Light!”
I couldn’t help laughing. Amber was going to be soo embarrassed when her cosmic after-effects finally wore off!
“Hi, Melanie!” said a clear little voice.
I glanced down to see a small angel boy beaming up at me. It was Obi, the cutest four year old in Heaven. To my surprise, he seemed to be all alone.
“Where’s Miss Dove, sweetie?”
“Well, aksherly,” he said calmly, “she’s at school teaching the other angel kids.” He slid a sticky hand into mine.
“You should be in school too Obi,” I told him. “What are you doing wandering around all by yourself?”
“I wanted to see your sparkles! They woke me up aksherly!” he added with a delighted giggle.
I was astounded. “You heard my aura - in your sleep?”
My sentence ended in a squeak as an unusually large blackbird landed on my shoulder in a rush of feathers. It gave my ear a friendly nibble.
“Cut that out.” I told it, giggling.
The air was suddenly full of whirring wings, as birds of all colours and sizes came swooping down to admire my ‘sparkles’.
The little angel boy’s eyes were shining with awe. “The birds love you Melanie!” he breathed.
Quite without any warning, I felt myself whoosh through to a higher level of existence. In that dazzling instant I understood that EVERYTHING in the Universe loved me! Not just birds and cute little angel boys but germs and stars and blades of grass. Most wonderful of all, I loved them all right back!
I tilted my head back, letting the sunlight fall on my face like kisses. The air smelled of lilacs. Every leaf on every tree glowed like a vivid green jewel.
I felt so - pure and - yes, POWERFUL. Like, I just had to think the right thoughts and wild flowers would come sprouting up through the pavement at my feet!
Lola was watching with a resigned expression. She gave a deep sigh. “Oh man! Your upgrade is kicking in big time!”
Chapter Three
I truly don’t know where Lola gets her patience. Somehow she successfully coaxed her babbling best friend (me again!) to school next day. We had almost reached our classroom when a teeny gold butterfly flitted past leaving joyful energy trails like shimmery ribbons in the air.
Suddenly I had to be as free as that butterfly, or I was going to DIE.
I backed away from the door. “Sorry, I can’t go in.”
“Of course you can, sweetie,” she said, in the gentle-but-firm voice she’d been using ever since my upgrade kicked in. “Anyway, I don’t think Mr Allbright will be too happy if you bunk off.”
“I don’t care,” I objected. “I mean, why do angels even need to go to school? Don’t laugh, Lollie, I’m serious! Do you have the slightest idea how much cosmic wisdom there is in ONE tiny flower?”
My soulmate sensibly didn’t even bother to reply. “Come on, little Bambi!” she grinned. “You can talk to the tiny flowers after school. Tell you what, we’ll go to the gym later so you can burn off some of this surplus energy.”
I let her march me into school, but I was fuming all through Mr Albright’s lesson. Lola was acting like I was going through some little phase. It didn’t occur to her this might be the new super-cosmic Mel Beeby! My ‘surplus energy’ was my precious birthday gift from the cosmic angels, which they were trusting me to share with the whole Universe.
My brilliant idea hit me so fast I saw stars!
To our classmates’ astonishment, I threw my arms round Lola. “I didn’t mean to be a diva! You were just trying to help! I see that now.”
Lola gently-but-firmly pushed me back into my seat. “Sweetie, Mr Allbright is trying to teach a maths class,” she whispered.
Everyone was hiding their smiles. Luckily I remembered in time that I loved everything and everyone in the Universe, no matter how misguided, so I blew them all happy kisses, including my teacher.
Somehow I managed to contain myself until lunchtime when I finally shared my huge revelation with my soulmate in the cafeteria.
“Lollie, I’ve just realised, I’m supposed to use my new cosmic powers to help planet Earth, and I want you come with me!”
My soulmate took a deep breath before she burst my pretty balloon. “Carita, I’m sorry, going back to Earth is not a good idea for you just now.”
Lola still didn’t know about Sky. She was just making a v. diplomatic reference to my birthday upgrade. In normal (i.e. not bonkers) circumstances, that’s what I’d have heard.
But in my state of extreme cosmic loopiness, I heard something like: The Agency would have to be clinically INSANE to send you on another mission. Letting your best FRIEND go over to the DARK Powers - they’ll probably never trust you AGAIN!
I went up the wall
“You’re the one who’s always telling me to follow my dreams!” I blazed. “But obviously you didn’t really mean it. OK, then, I’ll go by MYSELF!”
I stormed off towards the secretary’s office.
Lola came chasing after me. “I can see I made you mad,” she said breathlessly. “But I don’t completely understand what just happened.”
I was feverishly scanning the school notice board, hunting for a list of this term’s field trips. They were all fully subscribed, except for one tres obscure-sounding course: SPEND FIVE DAYS STUDYING TIME-STREAMS IN UPPER EGYPT.
I had no clue what ‘time-streams’ were, I just saw an opportunity to escape to Earth and share my fabulous cosmic energy with my fave planet. There were two places left. I scrabbled in my bag for a pen and signed my name bumpily at the bottom of the list.
Lola hastily read the flier over my shoulder. “Are you nutsl We HATED ancient Egypt.”
“This course isn’t in ancient Egypt,” I told her loftily. “It’s in my century.”
I read aloud from the blurb. ‘“You will be based in a locally run hostel with air-con and angelic internet facilities. Your studies will only occupy a few hours a day, leaving ample free time to visit local antiquities.’ I think it sounds cool!” I added defiantly.
“Boo, you do
realise they’re leaving at dawn tomorrow! That’s practically tonight"
“I know,” I said happily. “Can’t wait!”
That evening my soulmate cautiously popped her head round my door. “Hi!”
I looked up briefly from packing my bag. “Do you think they’ll have conditioner? Maybe I should take mine in case?”
Lola took a breath. “You know you wanted me to come on your Earth mission with you? How would you feel if we both did this time-stream course?”
“Are you kidding? I’d LOVE it!” I gave a gasp of disappointment. “But it’s too late. The office will be closed!”
Lola laughed. “Aha, but I knew that, so I just ran down to the library and used my internet skills to bag the last slot.”
We jumped up and down screaming with excitement.
“But what about the concert?” I remembered. “You had that solo and everything.”
“Pooh to that!” she giggled. “I’m not letting you have all those gorgeous foreign angel boys to yourself!”
Lola’s pants were so on fire it’s a wonder the heavenly fire brigade didn’t come bursting in to hose her down there and then. Realising I was determined to leave Heaven, my unbelievably lovely and loyal friend had rushed to our teacher, who put in a high priority call to Michael. He said since they couldn’t stop me going to Egypt (see previous comments on Free Will), Lola had to go with me and monitor my every move. Ignorant of this behind the scenes activity, I rushed off to help Lola pack.
“You know what?” I said emerging from her closet with an armful of cotton dresses. “I think something amazing is going to happen to me in Egypt. I got tingles in my belly button the minute I saw the word ‘Egypt’ on the flier.”
“Yeah?” Lola was stuffing random items in her backpack.
“Totally! This is like my hot date with destiny!” She straightened up.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but that hot date feeling isn’t always what you—”
“Tell you what,” I interrupted. “I’m going to run and fetch you that cute wrap dress. Blue’s more your colour anyway.” I flew off like an angel girl who’s glugged way too much diet cola.
Here’s what Lola would have said, if I could have come down off my whizzy pink cloud long enough to stick around and listen.
Your aura is all lit up like a Christmas tree, my loopy friend. The PODS could probably spot you from Mars. Please be VERY careful.
Here’s what my inner angel would have said, if she was still open for business.
The Test is coming. Stay home.
Chapter Four
The dawn time flight was packed with archaeology types in unattractive long shorts and floppy hats.
“And you’ve got your phone,” Lola said for the zillionth time.
“Yes, Lola, I’ve got my phone,” I sighed.
“And if you go anywhere without me, you absolutely promise to keep it switched on?”
“OK, OK, I promise!” I puffed out my cheeks.
Since I didn’t know a) that I was flying without radar or b) about the Test, I couldn’t imagine why Lola was being so twitchy. It’s usually me who gets nervous before cosmic adventures.
We arrived in the simmering heat of late afternoon. Outside the time portal the noise levels practically knocked me off my feet. Bus and car horns blaring. Egyptian pop music pumping from doorways.
Technically this was the twenty-first century, but it actually felt like all the different Egyptian centuries were rubbing along merrily side by side. You could see minarets soaring like fairy tale towers above shiny hotels and modern banks. Just visible through the crumbly ruins of an old temple, was the familiar egg-yolk yellow logo of a McDonald’s!
Shimmering like an angelic oasis between a noisy tourist bazaar and a small hotel was our hostel -invisible to humans, and so full of beautiful celestial vibes, no Dark agent could ever get inside.
We escaped gratefully into the air-conditioned foyer. The raucous street sounds cut out as if someone had flipped a switch.
After meeting our tutors and the other angel kids on the course, we were allocated a room on the third floor. To our relief it looked out over the tropical gardens at the back, not the dusty frantic street. French doors opened on to a small private balcony.
My friend wandered out to admire the view. “Boo, you can see the Nile from here! It looks just the same as in ancient times! Even those little boats, the feluccas, are the same.”
We unpacked then just flopped on our beds. A slightly-too-hot breeze wafted river smells in through the open window.
I was so happy I felt like I was literally floating. I’d dreamed of going on a mission and now, quite soon, it was going to happen - I just knew it.
I beamed across at Lola. “Glad you came?”
“Oh yeah, definitely.”
“I love being an angel, don’t you?” I babbled. “I keep thinking it can’t get any better, but it always always does!”
Lola nodded agreement but I saw a flicker of worry cross her face.
The sun was starting to set. One by one the amplified voices of the muezzins cried out from nearby minarets, calling faithful Muslims to prayer. We drifted out on to our balcony to listen.
The sun sank out of sight, leaving streaks like rosy chalk marks in the sky. I noticed a faint shimmer down by the river. Some local earth angels were sending vibes.
“We should join in,” I said impulsively.
“Mel, I don’t think that’s such a—”
“That’s why I came, Lollie,” I insisted. “To make Earth a better place!”
Making Earth a better place, also lighting up the night with my sparkly new aura. Equivalent to hanging out a flashing sign saying: FORCES OF EVIL HELP YOURSELF!
Lola opened her mouth, then shut it immediately. An angel girl without her divine radar isn’t exactly going to listen to your advice.
We sent vibes until the stars came out. Then we went in to get changed for the party.
There’s something I want to tell you. OK, I don’t exactly WANT to tell you, but there’s no point telling this story unless I tell the whole truth, not just the pretty sparkly bits.
Remember that speck of darkness? Remember I said I didn’t know it was there? I knew, OK?
I’d just put so much time and energy into hiding it, I’d very nearly fooled myself. But if you’d taken an x-ray of my soul when I arrived at the Angel Academy that’s what you’d have seen, pulsing like a teeny ugly little heart, among all that swirly rainbow-coloured soul light - a living sleeping seed of pure Dark energy, waiting for the exact right moment to wake up and do maximum damage.
I’d just been sending vibes in the open air, recklessly exposing my gorgeous but highly vulnerable new energy field to Earth’s deeply PODS-contaminated atmosphere. Near-perfect cosmic conditions for hatching out your own Dark angel.
No, I mean that literally. That’s the Test.
It’s a hot date - with your Dark side.
With absolutely no clue what was in store for me, I went on merrily trying to decide between my beaded gypsy skirt or my apple green miniskirt with appliqued daisies. Lola was in the bathroom putting on her face.
“I’m such a fluff-brain,” I called. “I’d totally forgotten Egypt is a Muslim country now! They had all those really random gods before.”
This was my friend’s cue to say, “Babe, you are not a fluff-brain. When are you going to start believing in yourself?”
What she actually said is. “Melanie! You can’t go dissing people’s GODS"
For some reason Lola’s reaction really upset me. I felt like she was saying I was stupid and insensitive to people’s cultures.
I returned my gypsy skirt to the wardrobe with an angry jangle of coat hangers. “I wasn’t dissing anybody,” I flashed back. “I was just saying I never really got a handle on them.”
My problem with the old Egyptian gods was they almost never came with their original heads, they were all like, half-cow, half-dog, half-mon
goose or whatever.
Before I could explain, Lola sang out, “There weren’t so many,” and she started spouting ancient Egyptian names! “There was Bastet, the cat goddess, Hathor and Osiris, oh and Hapy the river god—”
“I get it,” I growled, stepping into my miniskirt. “They had a LOT of gods!”
“Isis is my fave!” Lola went on, refusing to take the hint. “She was the protector of girls and women. She could be a bit violent, mind you! You wouldn’t want to make her mad.”
I’d come across Isis before in ancient Rome and been blown away by her genuinely sweet vibes, but I felt like if I said this now, I’d have let Lola get one up on me.
When that tiny seed of darkness wakes up, it doesn’t feel tiny. It feels like a huge unfriendly force trying to fight its way out of your chest.
“If you ask me, all the Egyptian gods were equally random and equally violent!” I snarled, then
I heard the spite in my voice and stopped in bewilderment.
Lola shot out of the bathroom. “Did I say something wrong? You sounded really mad.”
I had no idea what had just happened. I tweaked unhappily at my top. “I’m not mad. Have you finished in there? Because we’re going to be late for the party.”
Half an hour later, Lola and I were up in the hostel’s roof garden, piling our plates with delicious nibbles. I was wishing I’d brought my shrug. I’d forgotten how cold nights get in the desert.
Some earth-angel musicians had arrived. One did a quick mike check in Arabic. Someone played a couple of rippling chords, then the night filled with vibey local sounds.
Over our heads, stars glittered in the African darkness like huge silver mirror balls. I caught a sweet whiff of scented jasmine and my wildly unstable system swung into Joy Mode.
“This is so cool,” I gushed happily. “I’m loving Egypt this time.”
“Me too! This food is lush!” said Lola helping herself to more dip. “And they seem sweet,” she added, meaning our tutors.
“Yeah, Maryam’s got a wicked sense of humour.”
“She needs it with Khaled!” Lola giggled. “He’s kind of dynamic, wouldn’t you say?”