by Hart, Eve R.
I may have overshared on the details. But I had to tell someone and she was my best friend, after all.
“You’re insane.” I playfully shoved her shoulder.
“I’m not kidding. Okay, well, only half kidding. But don’t let him go.”
“I wasn’t planning on it,” I said. “Besides, I don’t think he’d let me even if I did.”
“Good.”
We fell silent and got lost in the movie again.
I went to bed thinking about what she’d said.
Maybe there was a part of me that was still holding back. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I didn’t think I deserved someone like him. And part of me was so worried about getting so lost and wrapped up in someone that I would end up losing myself.
But why?
I mean, I was trying so hard not to repeat my past mistakes. That much I did know. I had no clue how to get passed that. What would be the point when I knew that it was okay to let go? What would tell me that it would be alright?
My heart was ready to jump in head first. I think I handed it over to him that day he first showed up at my apartment and watched a movie with me. The day he didn’t hesitate to show me his insecurities and painted my toenails even if he didn’t know what the hell he was doing.
Thinking of him then made me smile like crazy.
And that was another thing.
I smiled all the time now and a lot of that had to do with him. It was because of him. The fact that he seemed to smile almost every time I did, made me think that he tried his hardest to get as many out of me as he could.
So how could I not give a man like that all of me?
I didn’t have an answer for that.
It was late, but I didn’t hesitate to reach for my phone.
“You okay?” he asked as soon as he answered his phone.
“Yeah,” I said in a whisper.
The walls were thin in this place and I didn’t want to wake Lavinia up. I knew she had an early shift and she tended to have a case of the grumpies when she didn’t get enough sleep. And that was not good for tips.
“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” he asked with a hint of amusement in his tone.
“I can’t sleep.”
“Why’s that?”
“I can’t stop thinking about you,” I answered honestly and bit my lip.
I’d said things here and there, but for the most part, he’d been the one to admit his feelings more than me. A few times I told him that I felt this thing between us and maybe I’d said that I liked spending time with him a time or two. More often than not, I just wept happy tears whenever he did sweet things. But I hadn’t really said stuff like how I missed him or how I thought about him when we weren’t together.
“I’ll come get you,” he said without missing a beat.
“No. No, it’s late and I’m sure you’re already in bed.”
“I am, but I’m just sitting here reading. I’d like to see you.”
I let out a giggle thinking about him sitting there on his bed completely naked and reading like it wasn’t a big deal. I loved how he was comfortable in his own skin. Even though he was clearly in better shape than me, it still made me want to do the same. Like if I could somehow sit there with him with all my insecurities hanging out while we did something simple like play a game or watch TV, then I might not look as bad as I see myself in my head.
Had I gotten up the courage to do that yet?
No.
I wasn’t at that point.
But the fact that I wanted to try made me realize that Cable was more than just some guy.
As much as I wanted him to get dressed and ride over here to get me, I wasn’t going to let him. But that didn’t mean I was quite ready to let him go right now.
“How did this whole nudist thing start anyway?” I asked because it was something we hadn’t talked about before.
“Not really sure,” he said and I could tell he was trying to think of how it came about. “I had sensitive skin when I was a kid. Mom had to change soaps and laundry detergent like every other week. I remember trying to get away with running around naked for a long time.”
I giggled imagining him as a little boy.
“I hate tight things too. I was always tall for my age and things never fit right. I outgrew clothes as soon as my parents brought them for me, or so it felt like. We weren’t rich, so I just had to make it work for as long as possible.”
He let out a sigh as if he didn’t feel like he was really giving a good reason for it all.
“I don’t know,” he said and I somehow felt his shrug through the phone. “Once I got my own place, I just sort of stopped putting on clothes once I got out of the shower. Not until I had to leave or something. Once I was dressed for the day, I would stay that way. Then one time, I came home and wondered why the hell I did that when no one else was around. So, I took my pants off and I think the rest is history.”
“You feel more comfortable like that?” I asked.
“Yeah. When I’m wearing clothes I feel itchy and confined.” There was a pause and I waited because I could tell he wasn’t done. “You know that feeling when you’re pulling a Band-Aid off real slow?”
“Kind of, yeah. I mean, I don’t think I’ve really paid attention, but sort of.”
“I feel like that when I’m wearing clothes. Only all over.”
“That’s… interesting.” I wasn’t really sure what to say to that. It sounded horribly uncomfortable and I understood why he’d want to get away from that feeling as much as possible. “So the no socks and underwear thing is like a way of cutting back on what you do have to have on?”
He let out a short laugh.
“Never really thought of it like that but yeah, I guess.”
“What are you reading about?” I asked because I didn’t want him to stop talking.
I loved his voice, even on the phone. It was deep and smooth and rich like the silkiest, darkest chocolate. And yes, it did things to me all the time.
“A man that quit the corporate life to live in the middle of the woods for a year.”
“Oh,” I answered thinking that it didn’t sound all that interesting. But that was okay because I liked the things that we had in common as much as the stuff we didn’t. “Please don’t tell me about it.” I let out a laugh and then his floated through the speaker into my ear like it was chasing my own. “Do you think about doing something like that? Going off the grid, leaving your computer behind to live like a mountain man?”
“Fuck, no,” he answered right away. “Not only do I love my life right now, but I also don’t think I could walk away from my computer like that.”
“Do you have a name for it? Do you secretly call it your girl or something in your head?”
“I’m not that bad. No.” He chuckled.
“So…” I said and let the silence hang there for a few seconds.
“So…?”
“You’re naked right now?” Wow, I sounded like a huge pervert.
He chuckled again, the sound so seductive and addicting.
“Yes, I am.”
“Are you hard for me right now, Cable.”
His breath caught, it was slight but I heard it. He cleared his throat and I heard a rustling in the background like he was shifting around on his bed.
“Really fucking hard for you, Claire.”
A soft moan escaped my throat just thinking about him sitting there. I squirmed and my legs fell open beneath the sheets.
“Are you wet for me, beautiful?”
“Yes,” I breathed out and I was desperate to ease the throbbing between my legs.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded, his voice lower than usual and held a possessive edge that only made me wetter.
My hand slid down my stomach and in between my legs. I circled my entrance once, spreading my slickness around. Then I began to slowly rub my clit like he wanted.
His breaths became choppy in my ear and I knew he was fisting himself. I
closed my eyes and pictured him doing it. I was hot and flushed all over.
“Faster, Claire. Touch yourself like you want me to fuck you.”
I moaned louder. Then his name fell off my lips like a desperate plea. My fingers worked faster and harder, just the way I liked for him to fuck me. My hips rocked and bucked as I pictured his big cock filling me up and stretching me until I no longer felt empty.
“Cable. Please,” I moaned out not even caring how loud I was being.
“I want to hear you come for me, Claire,” he said and he sounded strained like he was right on the edge with me. “Come so hard for me. Like when you soak my cock.”
My body shook and I could no longer hold on. Every inch of me was on fire and as I moaned out his name while I came, I felt like I was floating.
His sexy grunt filled my ear and I smiled at the thought of him shooting his seed all over his stomach as he came with me.
“Fuck, Claire,” he said sounding slightly out of breath.
I loved the way he said my name.
I loved the way he looked at me as if I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
I loved the way he cared enough to try even if he was unsure.
I loved… him.
I did.
And even though I was still riding high from my orgasm, I knew what I felt was real because I felt it even when I wasn’t.
“Cable?” His name came out shaky and soft.
“Yeah, beautiful?” He sounded as gone and sleepy as I felt.
“I love you,” I simply said.
“Claire?”
“Yeah, Cable?”
“I can die now,” he said with a sweet but slightly humors hint in his tone. “I love you too.”
I couldn’t say anything else because I was smiling too hard.
Oh, and my brain instantly turned to mush the moment I heard him say it.
“Good night, Claire.”
“Night, Cable,” I said back.
“Clint,” he said and it threw me for a minute.
“You’re name is Clint?”
“Yeah,” he said with a sigh like he wasn’t all that thrilled with his real name.
“It’s a good name. A strong name. Clint,” I said and smiled even though he couldn’t see it. “My sexy cowboy.”
He laughed and I knew I’d made it right somehow.
“Good night Clint, my sexy cowboy. You have a title now. Get used to it.”
“You amaze me, Claire.” There was a pause and a tiny sigh, almost like he couldn’t believe that it was all real. I didn’t know how to tell him I felt the same way. “Sweet dreams.”
Then he was gone and I was still smiling. I was pretty sure it stayed plastered to my face even as I drifted off to sleep.
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
Cable
“Hey, big dude,” Bridget said right after she gave a warning knock then walked into my room.
“What’s going on, Bridget?”
“Just checking on you.”
“I’m good,” I said and wasn’t able to contain my smile.
“Oh, yeah you are. Look at that. Awww, you’re so cute. So who is she?” she asked as she flopped down in the chair in the corner, coffee free for once.
I didn’t read too much into it.
Maybe she just came to see me in between cups.
I knew Lake and her weren’t at that point yet. Couldn’t tell you how I knew, but I had a good feeling they were going to take their time making a path in life. I didn’t doubt kids would come, but for some reason, I felt like it might be a later thing for them.
Now, B-ry and Laurel… well, I would have bet that they would be popping their first one out in the next year or two.
“Claire,” I said with a little chin jerk.
I’d been a little… distracted lately and hadn’t seen much of Bridget. She had no clue what was going on. And before that, I kept the whole Claire thing to myself. I realized how creepy it sounded. I mean, claiming a woman when I didn’t know a fucking thing about her and she had just been through all that shit. Yeah, it wasn’t right but I wouldn’t take it back.
So, yeah. I didn’t go around bragging about that.
“Claire? Like the Claire?” She sounded really shocked.
“Yep. That one.”
“I thought her and Sketch…”
“No,” I said shaking my head but not even feeling a bit threatened by her comment. “Their relationship is like…” I paused trying to think of the best way to describe it. “Ah, well, like you and me.”
“Oh,” she said dragging the sound out like she got it. “So… you and Claire?”
“Yep, me and Claire.” I smiled wide.
I knew Bridget didn’t know the whole story but she wasn’t stupid.
“She’s alright?” I could hear the genuine concern in her voice and damn, it fractured my heart a little. Lake was a lucky fucker. I hoped he knew that shit. What the fuck was I talking about?! Yeah, he knew that shit.
Then suddenly my mind was drifting. Thinking things that I was sure Claire wouldn’t be comfortable with. And not anything bad.
I was thinking about how I wanted to marry her. I had that feeling in me that I got from Lake every time he looked at his woman.
Yeah, already knew I was going to keep Claire. Knew I was going to marry her. Only, right this moment, I suddenly couldn’t wait to do it.
“She’s doing great,” I said as I blinked myself out of my daze. “She’s really determined to make her own way. You know, keep climbing up and all that. She’s… well, a fucking amazing woman, for damn sure.”
“That makes me happy,” she said with a smile. “I was worried but you know, I don’t want to know shit, so I don’t ask.”
“I know.” I gave her a tiny nod because I got it.
“Does she know?” She looked at me with a knowing smirk.
I rolled my eyes and laughed.
“Yes,” I said recalling that day. “She found out much like you. I have Sketch to thank for that one.”
Bridget laughed.
“Got to see the full Cable, did she?” She shot a cheesy wink at me.
“Yeah. And that was pretty much how we were really introduced. I mean, she didn’t really remember much from that night. And then I went to see her where she works one day but didn’t tell her who I was.”
“That’s great,” she said laughing at my expense. “Hey, it didn’t scare her off, I’m assuming.”
“This ass? Of course not.”
“Oh, look who’s full of himself.”
“You would be too.”
“That is true,” she said as her head nodded a few times. “That is true.”
She got to her feet.
“Well, just wanted to check on you. Glad to see you happy, big guy. I can’t wait to meet her.”
She flashed me a smile and then made her way to the door.
“Thanks, Bridget. I’ll bring her around soon.”
Then she was gone and I was left with my head circling around to the thoughts I had moments ago.
Was it crazy that I was ready to marry her that fucking second?
I thought back to my parents.
My dad knew right away. And he didn’t stop until she knew it too.
It worked out for them so maybe I wasn’t all that crazy.
But would it freak Claire out?
I could tell that it took a lot for her to say those three words to me last night. And I wondered if she hadn’t been post-orgasm and half asleep, would she have? Would she have said them to me if she’d been here with me?
I didn’t doubt that she meant them. I think that she had been falling for a while now. I could see it when she looked at me. I wasn’t going to say anything though. I wanted her to realize it on her own and I didn’t want to tell her how I felt because I didn’t want her to feel pressured to figure out her feelings.
My phone vibrated with a text. I picked it up and saw that it was from Claire. I didn’t hes
itate to open it right away.
Claire Ambrosia Livingston. February 3rd.
I stared at my phone for a long time unsure of what this was.
I pulled up the file that held the information I’d gotten on her for Sketch. I looked at the driver’s license again, sure that the birth date on there was something different from the one I’d just read from her text.
Sure as shit, I was right. The one on her driver’s license said July sixth. And I already knew what it said as her last name. The same one that Sketch had given me.
I was really fucking confused.
I was also ready to start digging.
But as my fingers moved to do just that, I stopped.
Would she be okay if I did that? What did she want me to do with this information?
I figured the best thing would be to wait and let her explain it.
Another text came through and it was like she was in my head.
You can do your thing and look it up. Just don’t ask me to talk about it.
I had a feeling before I even started searching that this was her real information. And as I began to search, I had a feeling in my gut that I needed to prepare myself for what I was about to unearth.
I’d wondered why I couldn’t find much on her back when Sketch had first come to me.
I didn’t even question how the hell she’d gotten that name on a driver’s license. I imagined that with the people she sometimes found herself running to she probably stumbled across someone that could get her the fake documents that she needed.
I began to learn about the real Claire as I started to dig up things I had a feeling she’d never talk about. I got a tiny peek into the life she had before Sketch found her. And what I didn’t read about, I was able to sort of fill in the blanks.
The articles and news reports painted a picture of a happy family that had been ripped apart by one tragic night. An intruder that was high on something and looking for cash. And then angry when he couldn’t find anything of value. In the middle of the night, Claire’s parents had been murdered in their sleep. The only saving grace was that Claire had been at a sleepover at a friend’s house that night.
I couldn’t even imagine what she went through.