“As if you didn’t know,” Maya snapped. “And another news flash for you, Mom and Dad are here too, and they’re not real happy about it.”
He looked at Mia. “Your parents are here?”
She lifted both hands helplessly. Mia hadn’t actually invited any of her family along on this trip. She’d simply made the mistake of telling her twin what she was planning and Maya had taken it from there. Her family was circling the wagons to keep her from being hurt again. Hard to be angry with the people who loved you because they wanted to protect you.
Also hard to not be frustrated by them.
“Are Merry and her family here too?” Sam asked. “Cousins? Best friends?”
“Merry didn’t trust herself to see you,” Maya snapped.
Thank God, their older sister Merry had decided to stay home with her family or things would have been even wilder. It was comforting to realize that at least one member of her family was sane.
“Maya,” Mia said on a sigh, “you’re not helping. Close the door.”
“Fine but I’ll be listening anyway,” she warned and slammed the door so that the sound echoed along the hallway.
And she would be, too, Mia knew. “Merry stayed home to keep the bakery running,” she said. “Christmas is our busiest time of the year.”
“Yeah, I remember.”
“So busy,” she continued as if he hadn’t spoken, “Mom and Dad are cruising to Hawaii, but they’re going to fly home from there to help Merry.”
“I don’t get it.”
“Which part?”
“All of it.” He shook his head, took her arm and steered her further from the door, no doubt because he knew that Maya was indeed listening to everything they said. “I still don’t know why you’re here. Why you felt like you needed an army just to face me.”
“Not an army. Just people who love me.” Mia pulled her arm free of his grasp because the heat building up from his touch was way too distracting. How was she supposed to keep her mind on why she was there when he was capable of dissolving her brain so easily?
And that, she told herself, was exactly why the family had come along.
“We have to talk.”
“Yeah, I guessed that much,” he said, shooting a glance at the still closed door.
Just being this close to Sam was awakening everything inside her and Mia knew that she was really going to need her family as a buffer. Because her natural impulse was to move in closer, hook her arms around his neck and pull his head to hers for one of the kisses she had spent the last few months hungering for—and trying to forget.
But that wouldn’t solve anything. They would still be two people connected only by a piece of paper. They had never been married in the same way her parents were. The Harpers were a unit. A team, in the best sense of the word.
While Mia and Sam had shared a bed but not much else. He was always working and when he wasn’t, he was locked in his study, going over paperwork for the business or making calls or jetting off to meetings with clients and boat builders and—anyone who wasn’t her.
Passion still simmered between them, but she’d learned the hard way that desire wasn’t enough to build a life on. She needed a husband who was there to talk to, to laugh with—and they hadn’t done that nearly enough. She wanted a man who could bend and not be constricted by his own inner rules and Sam didn’t know how to bend. How to compromise. Mia had tried. Had fought for their marriage but when she realized that only she was trying, she gave up.
If he’d been willing to work on things with her, they’d still be together.
“Fine then. We’ll talk,” Sam said, still keeping a wary eye on the door of her suite as if expecting Maya to leap out again.
Mia would not have been surprised. Her twin was very protective.
“But not here where Maya’s listening to everything we say...” He frowned thoughtfully. “Once we’re underway, I need to meet with some of the crew, check on a few things...”
She sighed. “Of course you do.”
One eyebrow lifted. “You know I take these cruises to get the information I need on how our ships are operating.”
“I remember.” In fact, she recalled the cruises they’d taken together after they were married. Two of them. One to the Bahamas. One to Panama. And on each of them, the only time she really saw her new husband was at night, in their bed. Otherwise, Sam the Workaholic was so busy, it had been as if she were traveling alone.
“That’s why we’re here. On this ship,” Mia said. “I knew you’d be taking this cruise.”
He laughed. “Even knowing I hate the Christmas cruises?”
“Yes. Because it helps you avoid having to be at home with a non-Christmas,” she said.
His frown went a little deeper. Apparently, he didn’t like the fact that she could read him so easily. But it hadn’t been difficult. Sam hated Christmas and no matter how Mia had tried to drag him, kicking and screaming into the spirit of the holiday, he would not be moved. Her family had planned their wedding and he’d been surrounded by holly leaves, poinsettias and pine garlands. After the wedding, he’d given in to her need to have a tree and lights and garland, but he’d admitted to her that if she weren’t there, Christmas would have been just another day at his house.
She’d thought then and still believed that it was just sad. In her family, Christmas season started the day after Thanksgiving. Lights went up, carols were played, gifts were bought and wrapped and her sisters’ kids wrote and then revised letters to Santa at least once a week.
She’d tried to get him to tell her why he hated that holiday so much, but not surprisingly, he wouldn’t talk about it. How could she reach a man if every time she tried to breach his walls, he built them higher?
So yes, she’d known that Sam would take a Christmas cruise to avoid being at home in what was probably a naked house, devoid of any holiday cheer. It hadn’t made much sense to her until she realized that Christmas decorations meant nothing to him, but a house devoid of those very decorations only made him remember that he was different than most people. That he’d chosen to live in a gray world when others were celebrating.
“These cruises are booked months out,” he said. “How did you manage to get suites for the whole family?”
“Mike arranged it.”
Sam’s eyes flashed and she wasn’t surprised. His younger brother had always been on Mia’s side and thought their separation was the worst thing to happen to Sam. So Mia had counted on his brother’s help to “surprise” Sam on this cruise.
“Mike? My own brother?”
She might have enjoyed the complete shock stamped on Sam’s features, if she wasn’t worried that this situation could start an open war between the brothers.
“Don’t fault him for it either,” Mia warned. “He was helping me out, not betraying you,”
“What did you think I’d do to him?” he demanded and she heard the insult in his voice.
“Who knows?” She threw both hands up. “Fly to Florida and toss him in the ocean? Keelhaul him? Throw him in a dungeon somewhere? Chain him to a wall?”
His eyes went wide and he choked out a laugh. “I live in a penthouse condo, remember? Sadly, it doesn’t come equipped with a dungeon.”
Oh, she remembered the condo. Spectacular with an amazing view of the ocean through a wall of glass. And she remembered spending too much time alone in that luxurious, spacious place, because her husband had chosen to bury himself at work.
Okay, that worked to stiffen her spine.
“Fine,” she said. “Then we’re agreed. You don’t give Mike grief.”
“Or a Christmas bonus,” he muttered.
“He’s your partner, not your employee.” Shaking her head, Mia snapped, “You’re going to give him a hard time anyway, aren’t you?”
“I was kidding.”
“Were you?” she asked.
“Mostly. You know what? Forget about Mike.” Sam looked her square in the eye and asked, “Why are you here, Mia? And why’d you bring your family with you?”
She had needed the support because frankly, she didn’t trust herself around Sam. One look at him and her body overrode her mind. She had to be strong and wasn’t sure she could do it on her own. Still, she wasn’t going to tell him that.
“They wanted to take a cruise and I needed to be here to talk to you, so we all went together.”
“Sure. Happy coincidence. And why did you need to see me?”
“That’s going to be a longer conversation.”
“Does it include why you picked our anniversary to ambush me on a cruise ship?”
She could have kicked her twin. Maya wishing him a Happy Anniversary had been exactly the wrong thing to say. Mia loved that her family was so protective of her—and so really furious with Sam. But this was her life and she’d handle it her way. And reminding Sam about their anniversary, as if she were upset about it, wasn’t her way. Of course, she was shaken by the fact that she was here to talk divorce with her husband on their first anniversary, but that didn’t matter really, did it? Their marriage had ended months ago. What was happening now was just a formality.
And if he’d forgotten their anniversary, then Maya had just reminded him and that was infuriating, too. How could he forget? Was their all-too-brief marriage really that un-memorable? Was she? God knew, she’d forgotten nothing about her time with Sam.
Heck, just remembering the nights spent in his arms made her heart beat faster and her blood heat up until she felt like she had a fever. It was so hard to be this close to him and not lean in to kiss him. Touch his cheek. Smooth his hair back from his forehead. She muffled a sigh.
And all of this would have been much easier to handle if he didn’t look so good.
From the first moment they’d met, on one of his cruise ships, Mia had been drawn to him. It had felt then like an electrical attraction and it seemed that nothing had changed there. His pale blue eyes still looked at her as if she were the only woman in the world. His mouth still made her want to nibble at his bottom lip. And she knew firsthand what it was like to have those strong, muscular arms wrapped around her and oh boy, she’d love to feel that again—even knowing it would be a huge mistake.
She could be in serious trouble.
“Are you okay?”
His question snapped her brain out of a really lovely fantasy and for that she was grateful. Sort of.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” She looked up and down the corridor before turning her gaze back to his. “I didn’t choose to find you on our anniversary. It just worked out that way. And like I said, we need to talk and I don’t think this hallway is the place to do it.”
“You’re right.” He glanced at the closed door behind which Maya was no doubt lurking. “But I’m not doing it with your sister around, either.”
Mia laughed shortly. “No. Not a good plan. I’ll come to you once I make sure Mom and Dad are settled in. And I want to help Maya with the kids...”
“Fine. Once we get into open water, give me an hour, then come to my suite.”
She watched him walk away and her mouth went dry. Mia hated that her instinct was to chase him down and leap at him. She’d been doing so well, too. She was only dreaming about him three or four times a week now. Seeing him again, though, spending the next two weeks together on the same ship, was going to start up the fantasies and the desire all over again.
And there was zero way to avoid it.
Two
Mia being onboard this ship had already destroyed Sam’s concentration. For an hour, he talked with the Captain, studied weather patterns with the First Officer charged with navigation, then finally had a meeting with the Chief Security Officer to get a report on any possible situations.
Through it all, he heard his employees but didn’t listen with the same intensity he usually brought to his visits. How could he, when his mind kept drifting to his ex-wife?
Why did she have to look so damn good? And smell even better? He’d forgotten—or convinced himself—that he’d forgotten that subtle scent of summer that somehow clung to her. Her lotion? Shampoo? He’d never really investigated it because it hadn’t mattered to him how that scent appeared—he had simply enjoyed it.
And now it was with him again.
Haunting him again.
“And it’s Michael’s fault,” he muttered. Standing on the private deck of his suite, Sam gripped his cell phone, ordered it to “Call Michael,” then waited impatiently for his brother to pick up.
“Hey, Sam! How’s it going?”
Scowling at the sailboats skimming the water in the distance, Sam blurted out, “You know exactly how it’s going.”
Michael laughed. “Ah...so you’ve seen Mia.”
“Yes, I’ve seen her. And her twin. And apparently the rest of the family is aboard, too. What the hell were you thinking?” Sam curled one fist around the thick rail. The Plexiglas wall for safety only rose as high as the handrail. He wanted the feel of the wind against his face and right now, he was hoping it would cool him off. “I can’t believe you did this. I’m your brother. Where’s the loyalty?”
“Why wouldn’t I do it?” Michael argued. “I like Mia. I like who you were when you were with her.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
His brother sighed. “It means that she was good for you. You laughed more back then.”
“Yeah, everything was great until it wasn’t.”
That time with Mia hadn’t lasted. As he’d known going into the marriage that it wouldn’t. And even knowing that it would probably end badly, Sam had married her because he hadn’t been able to imagine life without her. He’d risked failure and failed. Now, not only did he not have Mia, he had memories that continued to choke him during long, empty nights.
“We’re divorced, Michael. It’s over. You setting this up isn’t helping any.”
“It was helping Mia,” his brother countered, then asked, “and if it’s over, why is this bugging you so much?”
Good question.
“Look, I don’t know why she had to see you, but when she asked, of course I did what I could.”
Naturally, Michael would offer to help. That was just who he was. Some of the anger drained away as Sam realized how different he and his younger brother were. When their parents divorced, the kids were split up. Michael went to Florida with their mother while Sam stayed in California with their father.
They’d stayed close because they’d worked at it, even though they were only together whenever court-mandated visits to the non-custodial parent kicked in. Their father had been a hard man with strict rules for how Sam lived his life. Their mother was a kindhearted woman who hadn’t been able to live with that hard man.
So Sam grew up with the knowledge that marriage was a trap and never lasted—his father after all, had been married four times. As a father, he was disinterested, barely aware of Sam’s existence. While Michael saw the other side of things with a mother who eventually remarried a man who had loved Michael as his own.
Now Sam was divorced and Michael was engaged and Sam sincerely hoped his little brother would have better luck in the marriage department than he himself had.
Mike was speaking, so Sam tuned in. “Why don’t you just enjoy the situation?”
Sam was stunned speechless—but that didn’t last. “Enjoy having my ex and her family—who all hate me, by the way—traveling with me for the next two weeks? Yeah, not gonna happen.”
Michael laughed, damn it.
“Are you scared of the Harpers?”
“No.”
Yes.
He hadn’t known back then how to deal with a family who defended each other. Who listened.
Who actually gave a damn. And he still didn’t have a clue.
His brother knew him too well, that was the problem. Once they were grown the two of them had made time for each other. Building a relationship that might have been denied them because of the way they were raised. When their father died, and the business had come to the two of them, they’d carved out a workable solution that suited both men.
Michael took care of the east coast cruises, Sam had the west coast. They made major decisions for the company together and trusted each other to do what was best for the growth they both wanted to see happen.
“Okay, I admit that having her family there might be a little problematic.”
“Yeah, you could say that.”
“So fine. Ignore the family, enjoy Mia.”
Oh, Sam would love to enjoy Mia. Every instinct he had was clamoring at him to go and find her. To pull her into his bed and never let her out again. But going there wasn’t good for either of them. In their brief marriage it had become crystal clear that Sam and Mia weren’t going to work out. She wanted more from him than he could give. Bottom line? They didn’t belong together and they’d both acknowledged that in less than a year. Why stir the embers just to get burned again?
“For God’s sake, Sam,” Michael continued, “you haven’t seen her in months.”
He was aware.
“Yeah well, she’ll be here soon to tell me why she’s on this cruise in the first place.”
And he couldn’t wait to hear it. Had she planned to be here on their anniversary? Or was that just happenstance as she’d said? Did it matter? Either way their anniversary wasn’t a celebration, but more a reminder of mistakes made.
He never should have married Mia, Sam knew that. But he’d done it anyway and so he’d only set Mia up for pain. That he hadn’t intended, but it had, apparently, been unavoidable. Hell, maybe that was why she was here. Just to let him know that she was over him and moving on with her life.
Why tell him at all?
And even if she wanted him to know, why book a cruise for that?
Scowling at an ocean that didn’t care what he was feeling or thinking, Sam heard Michael’s voice as if from a distance.
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