Blaze of Memory

by Singh, Nalini

  He wasn’t so sure. “How’s your head?”

  “Fine.” Slipping the tissue into the disposal bag, she made a face at him. “I’ve never been a good flier. What was your question?”

  Still not convinced, he made a mental note to have Glen check her out on their return. “What do you know about the genesis of Silence?”

  “Aside from what’s in the public domain, I know that it’s not as effective as the Council likes to make out—the anchors, the strong Psy the Net needs to maintain itself—they’re extremely vulnerable to sociopathy.”

  Dev had guessed as much. “But it is effective at a certain level?”

  “Yes.” She nodded. “You know there are abilities that predispose the individual to mental illness—or ones that drive them toward such illnesses because of what they demand.”

  “Go on.”

  “For example, some high-Gradient telepaths have trouble building shields—it’s as if their abilities are too strong to contain and the power leaks out. With Silence, at least they have an effective barrier of emotionlessness—even if things creep in, those things don’t affect them as deeply.”

  Dev considered that. “Justice Psy—they have a rep.”

  “Yes. Because the J-Psy work so closely with humans, they’re more prone to breaks from Silence.”

  And when Justice Psy broke, some very nasty people had a way of ending up dead. Dev didn’t necessarily think that was a bad thing, but if the highly trained J-Psy weren’t able to control their abilities, how could he expect it of a scared seven-year-old? “Is that why the Js always take breaks between cases?”

  Katya nodded. “From what I know, they generally work about a month, then go back in for intensive reconditioning before being given their next case.” Her eyes lingered on his. “We all came from the same stock,” she murmured. “It’s inevitable that even in a mixed-race population, mutations and recombination in the gene pool would produce an individual closer to Psy than to human.”

  He’d known she would understand—she was too smart not to. “Pretty sure the Council’s figured that out, too.”

  “It’s a possibility. But there is a certain arrogance among the higher levels of the Council superstructure—the Psy have become so used to thinking themselves the most powerful people on the planet that they fail to take something as simple, and as powerful, as nature into account.” This time, her eyes were troubled. “Dev, if your people are considering what I believe—don’t.”

  “You just told me that for some gifts, it’s the only choice.”

  Her hand tightened around his. “But it kills something in the individual and in the group. The PsyNet . . . it’s beautiful, but it’s dying, bit by slow bit. How could it not? We give it nothing but emptiness.”

  Dev understood her speaking of the Net as a living presence. The ShadowNet, too, had an entity of sorts that was its soul, its living imprint, though it was far, far younger than its counterpart in the PsyNet. “I’ve heard whispers of the NetMind.”

  “There’s a DarkMind, too.” Her voice was hollow. “Ming told me—I guess he thought I wouldn’t remember, or he didn’t care. The NetMind has split in two.”

  She didn’t have to say any more—if the fabric of the Net itself was being torn asunder, then how could Silence possibly be the answer? And yet ... “There are still killers in the Net, but there are fewer.”

  “Yes.” She swallowed. “I think, for a while, it did make things truly better. We were able to breathe without fear of what we might do, what might be done to us. But that soon became replaced with another kind of fear.”

  “The Council.” Dev thought over the implications. “That kind of a power structure is unavoidable once you embrace Silence—it rewards the naturally emotionless, people who have little to no empathy.” The sociopaths.

  “It’s a flaw in the system that we’ve become blind to.” Katya leaned her head against his shoulder. “What will you do?”

  “Fight for my people.”

  PETROKOV FAMILY ARCHIVES

  Letter dated January 1, 1979

  Dear Matthew,

  The decision has been made. Silence is to be implemented. Your father and I knew this was coming. We’ve been making plans.

  I love you so much, my babies. This plan, there’s a chance we’ll all die. I won’t lie to you, won’t try to hide the truth. At times, I think I’m being a hypocrite, condemning the others for letting the Council condition emotion out of their children when I’m putting you and Emily in mortal danger, but I know you with my mother’s heart.

  I know that my Matty is an artist, that you’re only ever fully who you are when your face is smudged with paint and your fingers splattered a thousand different colors.

  I know that my sweet Emily loves to sing, that she follows you around the house because she adores you so much.

  I know that your father would rather go mad a thousand times over than snuff out your bright lights.

  So we’ll do this. And we’ll hope there is a God.

  With all the love in my heart,

  Mom

  CHAPTER 35

  “The situation in Sri Lanka has been contained.” Henry’s resonant mental voice filled the psychic vault of the Council chambers. “The anchor in question is now under constant supervision.”

  “He already was,” Tatiana pointed out.

  “Yes,” Shoshanna said, “but previously, he had a degree of autonomy—as we all know, the anchors are so often cardinals that it’s near impossible to monitor them without a huge waste of manpower.”

  “But in this case,” Henry continued, “that manpower is warranted. I’ve got my personal guard on him, but if the Council is in agreement, I’d like a member of the Arrow Squad to join the team.”

  Kaleb felt a telepathic knock on his mind. Opening the channel, he found Nikita’s voice entering his head. They’re working together again.

  He’d noticed the same thing. Henry, however, is no longer the beta member of the pair.

  If they’ve found a way to balance their egos, Nikita commented, they stand to become the most powerful force on the Council.

  The fact that Nikita’s thoughts had followed his wasn’t unexpected—there was a reason he’d allied himself to the San Francisco-based Councilor. Her mind was her most powerful tool, and, unlike the others, she had no thoughts of taking over the Net. Nikita was only interested in her own business interests. It made her an excellent partner for a man who was interested in gaining control over the PsyNet itself.

  “Agreed,” Kaleb said as the Arrow question was put to a quick vote.

  Anthony Kyriakus was the single member who didn’t immediately agree. “Ming, my question is for you. I’ve heard a rumor that your Arrows are no longer under your complete control.”

  Kaleb had also heard that particular rumor, had in fact intended to explore the topic further. Now, he waited to see what Ming would say.

  “The rumors are incorrect,” Ming said. “The only issue of control relates to the reaction several long-serving Arrows are having to the Jax regimen.”

  “You’re still using Jax?” Tatiana asked.

  “Nothing else has proven as effective when it comes to maintaining absolute Silence.”

  It was more than that, Kaleb knew. Jax—recognized by most only as the scourge of the Psy—had been created for a very specific purpose. When given in the proper dosage, accurately calibrated to the individual, Jax had a way of erasing the personality without erasing the mind. A very precarious balance. “The ones who had the reaction,” he asked, “have they been taken care of?”

  “I’ve put them in a facility specifically designed to hold Arrows who’ve begun to degenerate.”

  Shoshanna spoke on the heels of Ming’s statment. “Why aren’t they dead? Surely they’re no longer useful.”

  “Arrows,” Ming said, the subtle emphasis reminding them he’d once been one himself, “have only one unbreakable rule—never leave another Arrow behind. It’s part of t
he psychological structure that allows them to function. If I eliminate the defective individuals, it will eventually lead to the disintegration of the near-blind loyalty that binds the Arrows to each other and to me.”

  “That,” Tatiana said, “sounds almost like an emotional attachment.”

  “It is no more emotional than a chick imprinting on its mother,” Ming said. “I’m their leader and they’ve agreed to follow me—as long as I don’t break that one underlying rule, they’ll do exactly that.”

  “How did such a rule ever come into play?” Shoshanna asked, exposing her ignorance of that aspect of human nature.

  Kaleb had done his research. He knew about Zaid Adelaja, the first Arrow. Knew, too, that the man had been a soldier turned assassin. And soldiers, no matter their race, lived and died for the team. Ignoring Ming’s answer to Shoshanna’s question, he rifled through his files, searching for the location of the place Ming sent his Arrows to die.

  He didn’t have it.

  But he would have by the time this day ended. “We also have another matter to discuss.” He began to tell them about the dark spots in the Net, doing his ostensible job as the Councilor most attuned to the NetMind. But in truth, he was watching and listening. Each Councilor would have a different response to this knowledge, and, when the time came, each Councilor would either live or die on that response.

  CHAPTER 36

  It was dark when the airjet landed, having flown at low speed to give Katya’s internal compass a chance to focus. She finally stopped them somewhere in the south of Alaska, the air frigid. Thanks to Michel, Dev was kitted out in heavy cold-weather gear, while Katya wore a thick scarf and a jacket much too large for her small frame. It would keep her warm for the time being, Dev thought critically, but no way was he taking her any farther into Alaska that way.

  “We’ll sort out some clothing for you tomorrow morning,” he said, picking up the keys to the all-terrain vehicle that Maggie had organized after his call from the airjet. “The cabin Maggie booked for us is attached to a tourist lodge. They should have a shop of some kind.”

  Katya’s expression was rueful. “I didn’t consider the cold up here when I decided to run.”

  His most possessive instincts spiking at the reminder of just how much danger she’d put herself in, he took her hand. “You’ll be fine in the car for the drive.”

  That drive took less than twenty minutes.

  “Your secretary is very efficient,” Katya said as Dev opened the door to their unit to reveal a brand new duffel on the dresser to the left. It proved to have everything—clothing included—that she might need over the next few days.

  “Why do you think I pay her so well?” Putting down his own duffel, he gave her a flashing smile that had been absent all day. She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed it until then.

  “This place is lovely,” she said, her eye drifting to the huge fluffy bed in the bedroom to the left. “But I still feel like we should keep going.”

  “You’re about to drop from exhaustion, and I’m not in the best shape either—in spite of the nap you gave me last night.”

  She squared her shoulders. “I refuse to feel guilty.”

  “It was my own bloody fault for not making sure I checked you for contraband.” A scowl. “We’ll catch a few hours’ sleep, then hit the road with clear heads. Probably get a lot farther.”

  In spite of the urgency that rippled through her veins, she couldn’t argue with his logic. “Okay.” Her eyes went right, to the second bedroom. She bit her lip. “Dev?”

  “Hmm?” He shrugged off his jacket and dropped it on the sofa before bending to pull off his boots.

  She’d already taken off her outerwear, leaving her wearing jeans and a sweater. “Which bedroom do you want?” It wasn’t the question she wanted to ask, but her courage deserted her at the last minute.

  “Left or right, it doesn’t matter to me.” He shrugged, finished with his boots, and rose to his feet, a big man with a shadowed jaw ... and eyes full of molten heat. “As long as you understand we’ll be sharing the same bed.”

  The world threatened to crumble from under her feet. “I don’t know,” she whispered. “Are you planning to tease me some more?”

  “Maybe.” A playful word, but his face was all hard angles. “And this time, you can broadcast as loud as you like—the other guests are all out on some overnight trip, and the lady who checked us in was human.”

  He was speaking with utter calm . . . but making no effort whatsoever to hide the jut of his arousal. “I need to shower.” It was true, but came out in a blurted rush.

  “Don’t take too long.” Lifting his fingers to his shirt, he began to undo the buttons. “You do need to get some sleep tonight.”

  Overwhelmed, she grabbed her things and ducked into the bathroom. The shower cleaned off the grit, but did nothing to cool down her body. After she got out, she quickly dried her hair and was about to dress in loose fleece pants and a sweatshirt when she hesitated, her mind filling with memories of the way Dev had pinned her up against the wall, all heat and barely leashed male power.

  Her entire body turned into one big pulse.

  Swallowing, she pulled on a long-sleeved woolen shirt over nothing but bare skin. If Dev wanted her, she wasn’t going to put any roadblocks in his path. She craved his touch. At first, after she’d woken, she’d thought any human touch would do. But she’d realized different in the days since—it hurt when she wasn’t touched, but the idea of being touched by just anyone made her skin crawl.

  Her body wanted Dev and only Dev.

  Taking a deep breath, she left the duffel in the bathroom and opened the door ... to find herself facing a naked sweep of muscled flesh, his chest right there for her to stroke, touch, kiss, his hands gripping the doorjamb above her head. Having decided after last night that she’d take him any way and any time she could get him, she pressed her lips to the rough heat of him, the smoothness of his skin contrasting deliciously with the curling hairs sprinkled over it.

  One hand thrust into her hair, holding her to him. Against her bare thighs, the denim of his jeans was a sweet abrasion as he pushed into her space, his erection nudging at the softness of her abdomen. Soft and hard. Male and female. Her skin tightened with pure need.

  “Do you know something, Katya?” A husky male voice, his hand keeping her in place. Taking the hint, she began to kiss her way across his chest. It was the most luscious of tasks—he was just so bluntly male that it was impossible to feel anything but deliciously, sensually female.

  “Are you listening to me?” A whisper against her ear, a little bite that made her suck in a breath, rise up on tiptoe.

  He hesitated. “You liked that?”

  Unable to answer with words, she simply angled her head to give him easier access. Taking it, he nibbled his way down her throat before untangling his hand from her hair and closing it about that throat with gentle possessiveness. The touch made her shudder, grip his waist harder. And when he lifted his head to press his lips demandingly against hers, she opened for him at once.

  The bite on her lower lip, the sharp dart of pain, sent a rush of liquid to the juncture of her thighs. Dev’s eyes were glittering when he raised his head. “Is it the pain or the control?”

  Her fingers curled against his skin as shame flooded her cheeks. “I’m aberrant.”

  He nipped at her lip again, sharper this time. It was all she could do to keep her feet. “No,” he said, stroking his thumb over the thudding pulse in her neck, “what you are is sexy as hell.” Another kiss, one that threatened to tumble her straight to the floor, it was so full of hunger and demand.

  “Bed,” she whispered against his mouth. “Please.”

  Letting go of the doorjamb, he swept her into his arms in a single smooth move. Neither of them said a word until he’d laid her down on the fluffy white comforter, his body blocking out the light as he came over her. “Now,” he said, putting one hand on her thigh, below the woo
l of her shirt, “answer the question.”

  “I don’t know,” she said honestly, unable to stop from smoothing her hands over his shoulders, his arms. “But I like it when you crowd me.”

  Dev’s hand stroked up. A harsh exhalation. “You’re not wearing any panties.” Rubbing his thumb along the sensitive crease of her thigh, he lowered his body until all she could see was Dev, his skin, his eyes, him. “Is this what you like? Being covered by me?”

  “Yes.” She arched into him, wanting to feel his weight, feel crushed by the sheer life of him. “Closer.”

  “It’s the sensation,” he murmured, cupping her for a single electric second before returning to his previous maddening caress. “After the dark.”

  That he understood, it broke her. “There was nothing there,” she whispered, nuzzling into his throat, drawing him into her lungs. “When they cut off my senses, when they put me into that chamber where I couldn’t even feel my skin ... it was like I was floating in nothingness. I went a little more mad with every hour that passed.”

  Dev brought his body down another fraction, allowing her to feel some of his weight. When she shuddered and grazed her teeth down his throat, he hissed out a breath. “The more contact, the better you feel.”

  “Yes.” She rubbed her body against him—or tried to. He was too heavy, holding her down. Her skin shimmered with waves of pleasure. “But this . . . only with you, Dev. I trust you.”

  He pushed a thigh between her own, opening her up, claiming her. “That’s a dangerous confession to make to a man like me.” Shifting slightly, he braced himself on his elbows above her, a solid wall of muscle and strength. “I’ll take everything you offer.”

  “Will you give anything back?” she somehow found the strength to ask.

  A gleam of sensual amusement. “Wait and see.”

  And she knew that tonight would be a night she’d remember for the rest of her life. Somehow, in this place, everything else had faded away. Here, there was only Dev, only Katya, and a sexual heat that threatened to consume them both.