It gets better Sawyer. It has to. At least, that’s what people say. Just breathe.
She plastered on a smile to hide her inner turmoil.
“Almost finished up. You guys are doing great,” Sawyer said. “There.”
She ripped the large piece of paper off her art pad and turned it around to show them all the finished product.
“Wow,” Lena gasped. “Would you look at that, Alex?”
“I see,” Alex gushed. “If the tattooing thing doesn’t work out, I may know a few people with galleries who might be interested in your work.”
Sawyer was speechless. She watched as the boys argued about which of them could see it first. It was adorable.
“Cool!” They said in unison when she showed them their cute little faces on paper. A second later a cart filled with candy apples passed by and that caught their attention. “Can we have one of those?”
The boys whined while Sawyer graciously accepted the tip Lena insisted on.
“This is being framed before we leave here today. Thank you.”
“Anytime.” Sawyer smiled and ruffled the kids’ hair. “You all take it easy on your parents, you hear?”
“Oh, they will,” Alex said. “Won’t you boys?”
“Yes, daddy.”
“Good,” Alex replied. He then extended his hand towards her to shake hers. “Welcome back, Sawyer. It’s good to see you again. My condolences to you on your sister’s passing. Carley was a good woman.” She could only nod before he turned to address Jagger. “Jag we will see you around most definitely.”
She watched Jagger nod his head as Alex led his family away and she tried to mask her shock that Alex recognized her, let alone found out about her sister’s tragic passing.
You will not cry here, you will not…
“You’re stronger than you realize,” Jagger said as if he’d read her mind. He stepped closer. “I’m so sorry about Carley, baby.” He hugged her and she had to wipe the tears from her eyes.
Dang it!
“I can’t talk about this here, Jag. I’ll be a mess,” she confessed.
“Understood. But have dinner with me. We can talk about whatever you want later. I just miss you,” he said as he tilted her chin, so he could kiss her on the forehead.
Sawyer could see the complete sincerity of his words on his face because he looked at her like she was his everything right then and she gasped. “You sure about that? I’ve always had so much baggage, Jag. You deserve better than me.”
“The hell I do. You’re an amazing woman. When are you going to realize it? Because I’m telling you now, I want to be the man who shows you. Have dinner with me. Stop running.”
“I don’t know.” Sawyer stepped away from him because it was hard to think when he was touching her. Was she ready to put herself out there again? To love him and risk being hurt once more? She’d already lost everything once and the one person she could always count on was now dead. She was scared to take the risk.
Her heart battled with her mind. The latter was telling her to stay cautious, while deep down, she already knew it was too late because the other night with him had solidified it. She was already in love. He was her one and only. She sighed. “Fine. Pick me up tomorrow at seven?”
“You won’t regret this, sugar.” Jagger exhaled, giving her an electrifying smile. “You’ll see.”
Chapter Five
Sawyer
Sawyer hoped she wasn’t trying too hard. It’d taken her almost all afternoon to get herself ready for their date tonight and she’d dressed up instead of sticking to her preferred jeans and tee look. Why was she feeling so nervous now?
It’s Jag, Sawyer. He’s seen you at your worst and still wanted you, remember?
Sawyer sighed as she stood in front of the floor-length mirror to look at herself one last time. Her hair cascaded in loose waves down her shoulders and back. She’d taken her time to curl it and it added a touch of volume to her already thick locks. As for makeup, she went with a smoky eye look and bright red lips to match her outfit. It put a new definition to the little black dress, short, tight, and sleeveless, to show off her tattoos and curvy figure. She completed it all with a pair of cute red fuck-me-pumps and she was feeling badass now.
Here goes nothin’.
She blew herself a kiss as the doorbell rang.
“Hello, cowboy.” She opened the door to Jagger and leaned against the frame while she checked him out. “Look at you all gussied up and looking good.”
His dark brown hair couldn’t be tamed. It was messy, but sexy on him, and it curled a little around the nape of his neck. He wore a form-fitting dark blue button-down that accentuated his fit body and she wanted to drool. Instead, she cleared her throat.
“Says the woman who looks good enough to eat.” His gaze intensified and ignited with passion, as if he’d like to skip dinner all together and head straight to a Sawyer-flavored dessert.
“Why, Jag, I’m flattered.” She fluttered her eyes at him and chuckled. “I’ll just grab my purse and I’m ready to hit the road.” There was a little more bounce in her step and sway in her hips as she went to get it. “I need sustenance first and we can talk dessert later on.” She winked at him and he groaned.
“Woman, you test my patience. Now get that sweet butt into the truck so I can show you off. I’ll be the envy of any man who sees you because tonight you’re mine, sugar. And Sawyer, you can count on making those arrangements because I plan on loving you long and hard honey. Long and hard.” He tapped her ass on the way out of the house and chuckled when she squealed with delight.
They were on their way.
“So where are you taking me, anyway?” Sawyer smoothed her hands down her short skirt and fidgeted in the truck. That little tap on the butt along with his promising words made her hot and bothered, so the subject change was welcome because she desperately needed to take her mind off thinking about all the deliciousness that was Jagger and the things he’d do to her.
“I’m bringing you to the Steak House and figured we could stop by for a drink at Tipsy’s after.” Jagger shrugged. “That okay?”
“Hell yeah!” She grinned. “I love steak. Miss me some good ol’ barbeque. The drink sounds good too, but could we make a stop first after we eat?”
He nodded and lifted a brow as he took a quick peek at her before looking back at the road ahead of them. “What’d you have in mind?”
“My livelihood,” she said, facing him enthusiastically. “Mad Ink is opening in a few days and I wanted to show you its progress. It’s amazing, Jag. My dream is coming true. I never thought I’d make it happen in Kerrville, of all places, considering my past but now…” She reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze before letting go. “Now, there’s no other place I’d rather be.”
“I love hearing that.” He glanced at her again and gulped. “I’m proud of you, Sawyer. Always have been. I’m truly sorry for what happened to Carley. I know she’d be proud too. You’re not alone anymore, sweetheart, and I thank God every day that we’ve been given this second chance to get to know each other again because honestly, there’s no place I’d rather be, either.”
“Wow,” she whispered, completely in awe with him. He always managed to find a way to take her breath away. “You sure have a way with words. Thank you!” She blinked a couple of times to fight back her happy tears and the moment he stopped the truck in the restaurant parking lot, she flung herself into his arms to show him her appreciation with a kiss.
His soft, plump lips were delectable and molded against hers like they were meant to be there. She slipped her tongue inside them and caressed it against his. He hoisted her onto his lap to get more comfortable, but they took their time exploring each other. They kept it appropriate for the public, yet neither were in a rush to leave the warm truck now. Sawyer reveled in his taste. She was totally hooked. His hard body pressed tightly to hers and her nipples puckered, her pussy flooded, and she ached in the most delicious way possi
ble before he pulled away breathlessly.
“Well, you have an amazing way of showing your appreciation.” He smiled and gripped her hips tighter. “We’ve got to slow down, sugar, because I’m right near my breaking point. Let’s get you some grub, fuel you up, and get on with our night. There’ll be plenty more where that came from.” He winked and reluctantly lifted her off, so he could open his door.
“Promise?” She touched her lips where she could still feel him and waited for him to open her door.
“Now, have I ever let you down?”
Sawyer stayed silent for a minute because old insecurities came to surface from so long ago. Jagger took notice.
“Hey, you okay?” He tilted her chin with his finger, so she couldn’t avoid his gaze.
“Yes and no.” She smiled shyly, hating, yet loving how well he knew her cues. “What I mean is, I’m fine. And no, you haven’t let me down yet.”
“Good,” he said, giving her a quick peck on the cheek. “Now, let’s eat.”
The Steak House was a busy barbeque joint and a cozy family restaurant. The smell of mesquite steaks, burgers, and chicken fried steak assaulted her senses when they walked in. Her mouth watered and her stomach growled in anticipation. Man, she was hungry now for something other than the man she was with.
She giggled as they took their seats.
“What’s so funny?” Jagger became immediately intrigued.
“My tummy’s rumbling, my mouth is watering, the smell in here is divine, and I can’t wait to dig in.” Sawyer shrugged. “Before we arrived, the only delectable thing I wanted to take a big ol’ bite out of was you. Now that we’re in here, I’m hungry for the food.”
“Fair enough.” He chuckled. “How about we order?”
He flagged the waitress over and they ordered beer and appetizers while they waited for the main course. Jagger ordered a ribeye, rare, with all the fixings and she went with a sirloin, medium, with a side of rice.
They sat in comfortable silence while Sawyer checked out the rest of the restaurant. Wooden floors, paneled walls, and cowboy memorabilia as far as the eye could see surrounded them. There was a small bar on the left and a couple of big screens above it. Their waitress came back with their potato skins and whatever was on tap and when she left, Sawyer felt the need to apologize. “Hey, Jag, about the other night…”
“What about it?” He grabbed the appetizer and took a big bite while hers remained on the plate.
“I’m sorry for running. When I was on the phone with Toby, it brought a lot of stuff up, you know, about Carley.” She paused for a second and took a deep breath. “I miss her something fierce. Toby’s taking it just as hard, if not worse. Anyway, then I got the roses. That combined with all your other sweet gestures got me thinking about us and what we had. I didn’t want to be alone and, well, I must be honest with you. My intention was for you to make me feel good, you know, to forget even if for only a little while, and believe me you did. It was the feelings it brought up after we did the deed that scared the crap out of me and I needed some time to sort it out.”
“So, you used me for sex.” Jagger lifted a brow and she could see he tried to keep a straight face but couldn’t. “Trust me, sugar. I do not mind, not at all.”
“Thank God,” she said with a deep breath. She felt a little better now that she opened up. She started to eat too but nearly choked when he continued to talk.
“I still think I should make my intentions clear before we go on. I’m not into games, Sawyer. We’re both too old for that and your feelings aren’t one-sided. When I’m with you, I want more. Hell, I want it all. We can go as fast or as slow as you need, but I can’t let you go again. Tell me you’re okay with that.”
“Um…” Her eyes widened in shock and she was utterly speechless. She needed a second to process what he was asking. “Y-you want to be exclusive?”
The look on his face told her all she needed to know because he was giving her a “well, duh” expression. “You’re damn right I do. You’ve always been mine, Sawyer, and from the moment I realized it was really you and you were back for good, I also knew I never stopped loving you.”
“Wow, there you go again. How is it you can easily take my breath away every time we’re together?” She asked with a wide smile.
But Jagger groaned. “Would you please put me out of my misery, woman, and answer the question?”
“Which one was that again?” She teased, but when his eyes narrowed, she surrendered. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. The answer to your question is I think I am. I love you too, Jag. But are you sure you’re ready for my kind of messed up? My sister just died, I’m on my own, and I’m busy with starting the business.”
“You should know by now that your kind of crazy doesn’t scare me, sugar. You’re not alone anymore and if I have my way, you never will be again. We clear?”
“Crystal.” She snickered. “Just wanted you to know what you are getting yourself into. I haven’t had a relationship since you. I hope I remember how.”
“Now I’m speechless,” he teased. “Not one guy since me?”
“Oh, there were guys, but nothing serious.” She shrugged and there was a visible tick in Jagger’s cheek as he thought about it.
“You don’t say,” he growled. She reached across the table to hold his hand.
“There was only one you, Jag. I think you ruined me for all other men, so breathe, baby. It’s all good. Besides, it’s not like I was your only.” She challenged.
He took a deep breath.
“You were the one that mattered most,” he replied.
“Nice save.” Sawyer laughed. “See? All is good.” The waitress set down their entrees and when she left, Sawyer continued. “Now let’s just leave the past where it belongs and enjoy our moments from now on. I’m having a good time tonight.”
“Me too,” he grunted as he cut his steak. “So, I ruined you for all men, huh?”
“I knew you’d like that bit of information.” She shook her head, completely amused.
“It’s good for the ego.” He smirked and took a big bite of steak with gusto.
“Oh, hush up and eat,” she said, still amused with him. They went back to their comfortable silence during the meal. Twenty-five minutes later, they were sipping coffee and waiting for the check when their bubble of happiness burst.
“Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.” Stacey sneered. “Sewer Maddox.”
Sawyer stiffened, and her face was void of emotion while she replied. “Stacey, we’re not kids anymore and you’re about as welcome as a wet shoe so move along.” She faced Jagger again to dismiss the other woman, hoping she’d take the hint and move on, but there was no such luck. One of her past tormentors was right there in the flesh and by the looks of it, she was just getting started.
“I heard you were back in town and I couldn’t believe my ears.” She looked at Sawyer as if she was scum stuck to the bottom of a barrel. Jagger’s face turned red with anger. “Imagine my surprise when I walk in here and see Jagger slumming it again with Kerrville’s trashiest.”
“Careful there, Stacey. You’re showing the horns holding up that halo you pretend to have.” Jagger stood before Sawyer could stop him. She didn’t need him to fight her battles for her anymore. She wasn’t the timid little girl she had once been. She was a grown woman with a big heart and thick skin. She wasn’t afraid of a little blonde stick figure talking smack. She wouldn’t go back there again.
“Whatever, Hale. Look at you both. She’s some kind of rock wannabe and you’re all country. The two don’t go together,” Stacey spat.
“That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. There’s more to people than appearances, Stacey, and I feel sorry for you, if you haven’t realized that already. So what? I have tattoos and a few piercings. It makes me interesting and an individual. I don’t want to be cookie cutter, but if that’s your thing, more power to you. I don’t know what it is I did to make you hate me, but you need t
o get over it and move on with your life.” Sawyer was getting exasperated with the situation and people were staring. She was done giving this woman power over her self-esteem and decided to take the higher road by talking it out instead of getting hot-headed about the insults.
But Stacey didn’t take the hint. She seemed to get angrier the more they didn’t give her the reaction she expected and there was only so much a woman could take. Some people were just born mean.
“I heard about the fire.” She feigned a pout at Sawyer while her eyes narrowed. “Poor, poor maggot.”
Okay it is on, make fun of me all you want but you do not, and I repeat do not say anything about the people I love. Carley had sacrificed so much for her and the moment she heard the disrespect coming out of Stacey’s mouth by calling her sister that deplorable name like she’d done as they were kids, Sawyer was out of her chair so fast and in Stacey's face in an instant. Sawyer talked low and pretended to smile as onlookers gawked but the warning was obvious in her tone.
“I’d like to remind you that we’re not kids anymore and in case you haven’t noticed, I’m not the same person I once was. I’m no pushover, so think twice before anything else comes out of that filthy little mouth. You’re going to leave me alone, you’re going to leave Jagger alone, and if you ever, and I mean ever say anything bad about my sister again, I will end you. You got me?”
“Um hum,” she squeaked. “Whatever.”
“Good. Now move along and remember what I said.” Sawyer took a deep breath when she sat down again. She gave Stacey one last glare and the other woman bolted for the door. Man, she hated confrontation, but she hated feeling inferior even more. That part of her past was behind her.
“Dang, you’re sexy.” Jagger shook his head in awe. “Remind me to stay on your good side.”
***
“So, this is it,” Sawyer said as she fished the keys out of her purse to let them inside the tattoo shop. “They installed the sign this morning. What do you think?” She gestured towards the front window. She wasn’t as enthusiastic to show him her shop as she had been earlier. Her confrontation with Stacey lingered and it bothered her to know that the horrible woman was affecting her yet again.
Chasing Butterflies (Bad Girls Book 1) Page 5