“Holy shit.”
“It’s been yours all along…”
“You always had that he wanted…”
“It’s been yours all along…”
Holy. Shit.
Chapter Thirteen
Beau
My knee bounces throughout my time at the bank, just wanting to be done with it already. I can’t stop wondering if she was mine all along. All that time I wasted not manning up and admitting my feelings.
Luckily, it doesn’t take us long to sign the documents and before I know it, I’m walking out the door with Grant by my side.
“Well, that was painless.”
“Says you. I’m the one who just bought half a company. When I wake up in the middle of the night in cold sweats, I’ll give you a call.”
He laughs, his hands resting on his slightly rounded stomach. “You’ll get used to the feeling. Trust me, boy, if I didn’t believe in the business and know it was successful, I wouldn’t bring you in.”
“I know. And I’m grateful for the opportunity and the faith you have in me that I’m not going to send your retirement into the shitter.”
“Sounds like it’s a good thing I have enough faith for the both of us. Everything else okay? You get a house settled yet? You got everything squared away for your crews to start next week?”
“Pretty much. We’ll have to do some back and forth traveling until we get the shop set up here, but no one’s bitchin’ about it, so that’s good. They must not hate the idea too much.”
“Suppose not. They get to sit in an air conditioned cab an hour each way just to get supplies and get paid for it.”
“Very true. Soon that won’t be a problem and honestly, it’s not even a problem now. As you know, our lumberyards deliver straight to the job site so it’s not even like we’ll be traveling much.”
“Perfect. Why didn’t we do this earlier?”
Smiling, I lick my lips and look across the street before back to Grant. He pulls out a pack of cigarettes and lights one up and I shake my head. He inhales deeply and blows the smoke away from me but doesn’t react to my head shake. I might not like it that he smokes, but I’m also not one to pass judgement on someone. We all have our vices, both good and bad. Nicotine is his vice.
“Need to finalize the house, too, but otherwise, yeah. Waiting on my old house to be officially sold.”
“You’re moving fast,” he remarks.
He’s not wrong. “Maybe I just needed a push to do something I’ve been wanting to do for a while.”
“Talking about moving home or finally admitting that you’re in love with Addy?”
My eyes look over his shoulder, not wanting him to see the truth that lies there. It’s a mistake, though, because what do my eyes land on? Her flower shop. The Village Florist. He looks behind him and follows my line of sight to where Addy steps outside to water some flowers that are in hanging pots on either side of their door.
“Yeah. I kind of figured as much. Maybe timing needed to be on your side.”
“My brother…”
“Chris would want you both to be happy, Beau. You know that. He would hate to be the reason you two are apart.”
I grab a quarter from my pocket and start flipping it through my fingers. “I don’t know.”
“I do.”
My head jerks in his direction. “What? How?”
“He told me,” he says, shrugging like it’s no big deal.
“Uh, I’m going to need a little more information here.”
“Remember last fall when we had that big company family picnic and I invited your entire family?”
Yes, I remember that. It was embarrassing as fuck. While most of the employees had their wives and kids with them, I had my mommy and daddy. And my two brothers. As well as Addy and Zoey. Though, to be fair, Grant also made it a surprise thirtieth birthday party for me.
It was also the day I almost got into a brawl with Derek, one of the employees, when he kept hitting on Addy. It wasn’t the first time I realized I loved her, but it was the first time I recognized how deeply in love with her I truly was. Until then, I thought maybe it was something I’d grow out of. Turns out, you don’t just grow out of love with someone.
I nod and he continues. “I had a long talk with your brother after you almost laid out Derek. He said you’d been an idiot for as long as he could remember, not seeing what was right in front of you. He told me then that he knew the only reason you and Addy hadn’t made it official was because of him. He hated it. Started bawling and shit. He was a mess, right there at the party. Had to get himself cleaned up to make himself presentable again. I felt awful for the poor kid, so distraught because his brother couldn’t pull his head out of his ass.”
My eyes widen and he busts out laughing, letting me know that he’s full of crap. I stop flipping the quarter and press a hand to my chest and blow out a breath. “You’re a jackass.”
“Wanted to make sure you were paying attention.” His tone changes to serious. “So maybe he didn’t cry but he did look upset by it. He would want you to be happy. Addy, too. And, if Addy’s happy, that helps Zoey to be happy.”
“What if she’s not in the same place I am?”
To that he laughs again, actually bends over and slaps his knee then grips my shoulder to maintain balance. “Oh, shit, man. That was a good one. I needed this laugh.”
“I’m serious!”
“I know you are,” he says, wiping away tears from his eyes. “That’s what makes it so damn funny.”
“Stop laughing at me!”
“Stop saying funny shit then,” he counters.
“Grant,” I growl.
He walks to his truck and leans against the driver’s door, crossing his arms. I stand in front of him and do the same.
“Addy and you belong together, Beau. It’s time you realized it.”
“That’s not the part I’m confused about.”
“It’s not inappropriate to be with her.”
I slide on my sunglasses and look across the street to her flower shop. “Isn’t it, though?”
“No. It isn’t. I can’t say anything to make you believe that, but listen to me when I say this, okay?”
“What is it?”
“Do you think, that when Chris was taking his last breath, his final thought was that he was glad he didn’t take the chance on being with Addy or having Zoey? Life is short, Beau. We know this. Stop letting your fears get in the way of going after what you really want.”
Before I can respond, he turns and gets into his pickup, starts it up, and backs into the street. I stare at the flower shop and bite my lip.
He’s right. As usual. I should learn from losing Chris that I can’t let life just pass me by. But how do I risk it? If it doesn’t work between us, I not only lose my best friend, I also lose the close relationship I have with my niece. Not that Addy wouldn’t let us be around each other, but I know it wouldn’t be the same. And what if what we have together only works because there isn’t the romance between us? What happens if I kiss her, like I almost did last night, and there’s no chemistry between us?
Why are you assuming it won’t work?
I don’t know why I’m sabotaging it before it even begins.
Actually, I do.
Because of how strong my feelings are for her. It’s not just a random hook-up or relationship. It’s Addy. There’s no room for me to mess this one up.
Even with all my doubts, deep down, I know that I’ll never forgive myself if I don’t try. She’s Addy. My Addy.
Only good because there isn’t romance? Nah, not the reason. Because I’m more romantic with Addy, even not being anything more than her friend, than I have ever been with anyone else. I think long and hard about the birthday gifts and cards I give her. I go to extra lengths to know everything about her, and not just the surface things like what’s her favorite color or food.
No chemistry between us? Impossible. When I came close to kissing her, t
he electricity that pulsed between us was undeniable. Addictive. Unforgettable.
I can only imagine what it will be like to actually kiss her.
I pull my phone out of my pocket and shoot her a text.
Me: What do you think about burgers tonight? I’ll grill.
Addy: Sounds great. Zoey will want fries, too.
Me: Smart girl.
Addy: Just like her mama!
I grin and pocket my phone then run a few more errands before going to the store to get everything we need for supper. While I’m out, I also pick up some triple chocolate cupcakes because hopefully tonight we’ll be celebrating. Or possibly, hopefully, doing something else after Zoey goes to bed.
I arrive at Addy’s house and her car is already parked in the garage. When I put my pickup in park, Zoey comes flying out of the house to greet me. Luckily I’m able to stop her before she goes head first into my crotch.
“Mommy said we’re havin’ hamburgers!”
“Sounds delicious!”
“I know!”
I set her down after a big squeeze and grab the groceries out of the back seat of my pickup. I have to stop myself from getting too eager, too excited about what I want to talk to Addy about. But that effort proves to be all for naught when I walk into the kitchen and see Addy standing at the counter in a pair of black cotton shorts and a t-shirt. I love it when she’s dancing to no music, like she is now. Her hips swaying back and forth and the faint hum of whatever song is stuck in her head filters through the room. Her legs look long and lean and like they’re meant to be wrapped around my waist while I drive into her.
I want to toss the food to the floor and walk up behind her, angle my head so it’s sitting perfectly in the crook of her neck, and inhale her sweet scent. My hands itch to wrap around her and slide up her front to cup her breasts or tangle in her long wavy dark blonde hair.
Fuck me, but I have so many things I want to do to her. With her. For her.
“Look, Mommy! Unca Beau’s here!”
She whirls around as if she’s been caught.
“Hey.”
She sighs and I swear it’s breathy when she says, “Hey back.”
I’ve never wanted Zoey to disappear in my life until this moment. Not disappear completely, obviously. I’m not an asshole. Just… make herself less present for a few minutes.
“Grabbed everything for supper.”
“And cupacakes!” Zoey shouts. I love the way she mixes up the pronunciation of words. Adorable.
“You been snooping through my bags, Squirt?”
She shakes her head, trying to look innocent but she’s anything but. I grab her around the waist and lift her up, blowing a raspberry on her soft belly. She giggles and wiggles in my hold, shouting my name. “Unca Beau! It tick… it tickles!” The words are barely understandable as she moves around in my arms, laughing the entire time.
My gosh she’s cute.
A little mini of Addy, but there’s plenty of Chris in her, too. And even though it makes me jealous, I wouldn’t have Zoey any other way.
“What do you think, Mama? What should we do with her for being such a snoop? Make her eat upside down?” I ask, flipping her over and holding her upside down by the ankles.
“Oh, that’s a perfect idea!” Addy zooms over next to us, tickling her belly gently all while little belly laughs roll through Zoey, Addy, and myself.
We’re all breathless by the time I set Zoey down on her feet, but she doesn’t go far.
“I love you, Unca Beau,” she says, hugging me around the legs. I lift Zoey back into my arms so I can give her a hug and whisper back, “I love you, too, Zoey. So much.”
Addy’s soft look almost does me in when she takes in the two of us and I can’t stop myself from pulling her in, too. With one arm under Zoey’s butt, I hold Addy around the shoulders by my other arm and kiss the side of her head.
Zoey gets tired of the hug-fest long before I do and not so subtly demands to be set down and runs to play with Macaroni. Before Addy can leave me also, I hug her alone, loving the feel of her softness in my arms. “I got something I want to talk to you about after Squirt goes to sleep.”
She looks up at me, chin resting on my chest. “Good stuff or bad stuff?”
“Good.”
“Well, I have something I want to talk to you about, too, so it works out.”
“Good stuff or bad stuff?” I ask, repeating her question.
“Good. I think.”
There’s heat in her eyes and with the way she’s touching my arms, as if she can’t not touch me, and hope flares in my chest that maybe she’s on the same path as I am.
“Addy…” I lean my head down so our foreheads are resting against one another and breathe her in. She always smells so good. A mixture of the flowers she’s been arranging all day and her own unique sweetness. I bet she’s sweet everywhere. My mouth waters just thinking about it. She shudders under my touch, almost like she knows what I’m thinking. “Damn, I hope your good stuff is the same as mine.”
She nods her head against me and I give her waist a squeeze. She stumbles just enough that it gets her closer to me. Closer isn’t enough. The need to become one with her is almost more than I can bear. Addy’s everything I ever wanted and for the first time in my life, I feel like she’s within reach. Like maybe it’s finally our time.
One hand travels slowly up my arm and over my shoulder until it settles against my neck. Her thumb slides over my chin, barely grazing the edge of my mouth. Her eyes watch her own movement until slowly they rise, connecting with me.
“Beau.” I breathe in my name from her lips and it fills me with so much need and want. It’s caveman-like. I understand why stories are told of them throwing their women over their shoulders and tossing them into a cave so they can have their wicked way with them.
Macaroni barks and scratches at the door, breaking the moment. We jump apart like we were just caught doing something wrong but I can’t allow the thought to settle in. Nothing about being with Addy is wrong and I finally get that.
I just hope she does, too.
Chapter Fourteen
Addy
I stop in my bathroom to get ready for bed, putting on only a little tank top and shorts, and climb into bed. It’s not exactly how I planned tonight to end, but Zoey was quite demanding about Beau reading to her and when I peeked in on them, they were both sound asleep. After taking a few pictures of the two because I couldn’t resist, I did a load of laundry then tried to wake Beau up so he could be more comfortable in his own bed. He only shifted in his sleep so here I am. Alone in my room, wishing things were different.
We didn’t even get a chance to talk tonight. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or bad thing, though. Deep down, I feel as if he was going to talk about the same thing I was. That maybe we both feel more for each other than we’ve ever admitted. It’s time. Finally. I just hope he does, too.
I pick up my kindle, I’ve been reading a new book I downloaded a few days ago about a girl who’s been in love with a guy who works at the local bar in town but has always been too shy to admit it, but right now I’m not in the mood for reading. Especially about something that is so closely related to my own life. Besides, I feel like it would take too much brain power and after today, I have no more left. All day I stressed over how to tell Beau that I want more between us, never settling on a way to do it aside from the rip off a band-aid approach.
But right now I need a distraction of some sort, so I turn on the TV. A few nights ago, Beau and I stopped watching Outlander at somewhat of a cliffhanger, though it seems most episodes tend to end that way, and I’m curious how it is going to turn out.
My eyes are glued to the screen as Jamie Fraser refuses to give up when his head is buried between Claire’s thighs and someone is knocking at the door. My hand is already between my own, doing a marvelous job of imagining it being Beau with me, and one hand is massaging my breast. But just like on screen, I’m interrupted by
a knock to the door.
Given the fact that Zoey never knocks if she enters my bedroom, I know who it is.
I take a deep breath and pull my fingers out from beneath my underwear and push my tank top back down to cover my breasts. My breaths are coming rapidly and my heart feels like it’s about to explode right out of my chest. “Holy shit,” I whisper. Louder, I say, “Just a second,” but even to my own ears, I sound turned on. Which, I am. Incredibly.
Gah, why did I turn on that show?
I shouldn’t open the door. I feel it in my bones that it’s a bad idea. Or maybe it’s a great one. It doesn’t matter, though, because I open the door anyway.
Now, I’ve seen Beau without a shirt more times than I can count, however, standing in the doorway to my bedroom, my skin on fire from my near orgasm but the tingles are still there. And the vision of a shirtless Beau, with his broad shoulders and strong chest that has a smattering of hair, arms that are tan and muscular from years of hard work, flat stomach, and hips that are wide enough to hold up his black shorts.
The breath leaves me shakily. “Need something?”
He takes me in, head to toe, and I squirm, wondering if what I was just doing is written all over my face. By the way his breathing matches my own, I’d venture to say it is.
He doesn’t say anything, just takes a step forward. Then another. And another until he’s directly in front of me, our chests centimeters apart.
“You. You’re what I need.”
I don’t dare lift my eyes, rather I keep them aimed directly at the rise and fall of his chest.
Damn.
Shit.
Hell.
That’s directly where I’m going.
And by the looks of it, he’s speeding along with me.
He shouldn’t be standing here looking like he wants to do to me the same as the scene I was just watching.
I shouldn’t be leaning in his direction hoping he takes me in his arms and has his wicked way with me.
The Path To Us: A Single Parent Romance Page 14