by Snow, Jenika
I shook my head. “You didn’t, Mom. It’s fine. Wine gets to my head too, and it’s not like I expected him to understand this situation fully after just meeting us. It takes some getting used to.”
“He was disrespectful,” Jareth said.
“I was about ready to pop him in the jaw,” Ryker inserted next, and I gave him a small smile, knowing both of them meant well.
The next thing I knew, Trevor was walking back toward us with this sheepish look on his face. “Listen, I wanted to apologize. I should’ve kept my mouth shut. It’s not my business about any of this. I guess I let the wine, my ego, and curiosity get the best of me.” He ran his hands down his Dockers, his nerves evident. “I really am sorry though.”
I could tell he was being genuine, knew he was embarrassed. “It’s fine. It’s done and over with.” And I meant that. “Just don’t let it become a habit, especially with my mother,” I said seriously, fiercely protective of my mom.
I didn’t want anything sour between us, especially if my mom did care for him. He turned and left, and my mom hugged all three of us before following him to the front door. Once I heard it shut, I walked toward the living room window and pulled the curtain aside, watching as they headed toward his Jeep.
But before she got in the vehicle, I could see her start to give him an earful, pointing to the house and shaking her head. I could just imagine what she was saying, how she was putting him in his place about being respectful. My mother didn’t lack the ability to make someone know and understand that what they’d done was absolutely unacceptable.
“He’s lucky we didn’t beat his fucking ass,” Ryker said.
“I was two seconds away from slapping the fucking curiosity out of him,” Jareth agreed.
I snorted and shook my head. “You guys are so big and bad, aren’t you?” Before I knew what was going on, Jareth had his arm wrapped around my shoulders, and Ryker curled his fingers around my waist. I was sandwiched between them, warmth filling me, contentment making me feel whole.
“She looks happy though, right?” I was speaking more to myself than to anyone else, but I felt my guys tighten their hold on me slightly.
“That she does,” Ryker murmured.
“He better treat her well,” Jareth said.
Ryker grunted in agreement. “Or I see an ass-whooping in his future.”
I looked between my two boys and knew that things would work out. I could feel it.
Chapter Sixteen
Sofie
Later that evening.
I was snuggled against Ryker’s chest, my legs sprawled over Jareth’s lap as he lazily massaged my bare feet, his touch relaxing, warming. Ryker had his arm around my shoulders, his fingers curled around my bicep.
My mother and Trevor had left hours ago, and after we all cleaned up, Ryker had run down to the ice cream shop and brought us back a giant, three-person hot fudge sundae that we devoured, laughing as we finished off another bottle of wine. Now we found ourselves lazily watching a comedy. Having my guys on either side of me felt so right. All of us playing house felt like we should have done it ages ago.
That’s how it felt to me, at least. Did it feel that way for them as well?
I knew what I wanted to talk about, and what better time than right now as I sat between Ryker and Jareth? I was nervous and scared of their response, their reaction. But if I didn’t do this now, I’d never know.
“Can I talk to you guys?” There was this shift in the atmosphere, the room seeming to still, the air growing thick. Seriousness surrounded us.
“Absolutely, Sofie.” Ryker was the one to speak first.
“You have our full attention always, baby girl,” Jareth said next.
God, why couldn’t I breathe? Why was the room so hot? Why did it feel like it was closing in on me?
I pushed myself off the couch and walked a few steps away from them, turning so that I could look into their faces when I brought this up. My heart was pounding so hard it was painful, and as Jareth and Ryker stared at me, their full attention trained right on me, I started to question if this was really the best thing for me to do.
But no time like the present, right?
We only live once, and none of us were getting any younger. The worst thing that they could say was no, that it wasn’t a good idea. But I wouldn’t know unless I asked. Taking that chance was the best thing I could do in this moment. And too much time had already passed without me knowing how our futures would go.
Alone.
Or together.
All of us.
The three of us.
“I wanted to talk about all of us...” I swallowed, a thick lump deciding to take up residence in my throat.
“What is it, baby?” Ryker asked, looking concerned all of a sudden.
“Sofie, you’re kind of worrying me, and I’m sure Ryker as well,” Jareth said and straightened. Ryker made a deep sound of agreement.
I could do this. I could. I had to.
So I took a deep breath, willed myself to have strength, and just came out and said it. “I love both of you,” I said and looked in each of their eyes, making sure they knew I was being serious, that this was coming from the heart. “I love both of you so much. I know us being together is unconventional, but I need you both in my life more than I’ve ever needed anything else.” I took a deep, steadying breath. “If I lost one of you—” The very thought had emotion rising up viciously in me. “—I’d feel like a piece of myself was missing.” I tried to sound strong, but I heard the way my voice cracked.
I’d been honest with them individually, and they knew how I felt, but having them both sit there in front of me as I talked about the feelings I had for both of them made me want to spill my entire heart. “I feel this connection with both of you, one that I’ve never felt before, that I never will feel with anyone else. I know with everything in me that you both were meant to be mine, just as I was meant to be yours.”
No one said anything for long seconds, their expressions stoic, their attention trained on me.
“But I understand if this isn’t something you guys see for yourself, see for your future. And as much as I love you, as much as I want you, I want you to have that choice. I understand if this is too complicated, if a monogamous relationship is what you’re after.” God, could they hear how fast and hard my heart was beating? “But what I want is both of you. And I know you said you’re okay with that. But are you really?” A suspended moment passed, and I waited for one of them—both of them—to respond.
Ryker cleared his throat, and Jareth shifted on the couch.
“What is it you actually see, Sofie?” Ryker was the one to speak first once again.
I swallowed. “I told you. I want both of you.”
He shook his head slowly. “No, I mean what do you really want?”
For a moment, I didn’t know what he meant. I’d spilled my heart to them, told them everything. And then as I looked into his eyes, glancing over at Jareth, I knew what he wanted. I knew what they both wanted.
“Tell us, baby girl.”
I looked to Jareth after he spoke. Yes, I knew what they wanted to hear. It’s what I wanted to say.
“I want all three of us together. I want us sleeping under the same roof, no more days split up between us, no more bouncing back and forth. I don’t want a ménage à trois.” A long pause filled the air. “I want two separate relationships, with the two men I love the most. But I want us all living together. And I want you guys to want that too.”
And then more silence, awkwardness filling me as I waited for them to tell me if that’s what they wanted too. God, I was on pins and needles. They’d told me many times they didn’t care that I was with the other, but what I was telling them, asking them, was far different than what they’d probably bargained for.
A throuple, as Trevor had put it.
A poly relationship.
I wasn’t interested in us being together sexually at the same time. I liked
how things were now, and I suspected they did as well. And I tried not to dwell on the idea that they’d tell me they didn’t want that, that they’d been thinking about this arrangement and it wasn’t what they wanted after all.
And then Ryker was the first to stand. He walked over to me but didn’t touch me, and I held my breath as I tipped my head back and looked into his face.
“Say something. Anything,” I whispered.
“Sofie.” He said my name so softly I wondered if I had really heard him say it. “I’ve known you my entire life. I’ve loved you for nearly as long.” He paused a moment, and I could see on his face he was gathering his thoughts. “The only thing I ever wanted was to make you happy.” He reached out and cupped my cheek then, smoothing his thumb right under my eyes. “There is no me without you. There is no life if you’re not in it.” He took a step closer to me. “I’m man enough, secure in my masculinity and our love for each other, to know that you need Jareth. I know he’s not a replacement for me, but an extension of what you need.”
I didn’t want to cry, but Ryker was saying things I felt so deeply I was on the verge of doing just that.
“So, my point is, I’m not going anywhere, baby. You’re stuck with me for life, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He leaned down and kissed me, and I rose on my toes to meet him, wrapping my arms around his neck and letting him pull me in close. After a long moment, he pulled back and smiled. “Besides, Jareth isn’t so bad,” he said and winked, looking over his shoulder and staring at the other man I was hopelessly in love with.
Ryker pulled back and stepped away, moving to stand by the back of the couch, letting Jareth take his place.
Jareth rose and moved toward me. He wasn’t in the three-piece suit I normally saw him in, but instead wore a pair of jeans and a button-down shirt. He had this intense expression on his face, something I was used to seeing, something that always made my heart race.
He was only a foot from me, looking down into my eyes, both of us sharing the same air. Although I hadn’t known him as long as I had Ryker, and although I hadn’t given my virginity to him like I had with the man who stood just a few feet from him, I’d given a different part of myself to him.
I’d submitted to him fully, opened my heart to him completely.
We shared something special as well. He’d given me experiences that I never thought possible. He gave me things Ryker hadn’t, and vice versa. And that’s how I knew we were all supposed to be together, all made for each other.
But I held my breath, waiting for him to speak.
“Sofie,” he said softly, and I held my breath. “So many things were said tonight,” he continued in a deep, husky voice. “So many things I knew, so many things I didn’t know.” He lifted his dark gaze and looked at my face. “My blue-eyed angel.” His voice was nothing more than a deep growl. “The only thing I want for you is to be happy, to live your life the way you want.” I saw emotion on his face. “And I’m lucky enough to be part of that future you want. We both are.” He lifted his hand and pushed some hair away from my cheek, letting his fingers play across my temple. “I’m okay with not having you fully. But I’ll only be okay with you giving yourself to Ryker. Only ever with him.”
I swallowed and looked over his shoulder at where Ryker stood. His hands were curled around the back of the couch, his jaw tight, a muscle ticking beneath the scruff.
“I think it’s safe to say that both of us want you badly enough, love you unconditionally enough, that we’re willing to share you, Sofie,” Ryker said and moved around the couch to stand next to Jareth. He lifted his hand and slid his fingers up my neck, the digits trailing along my pulse point. He cupped one side of my throat while Jareth held the other.
And both of my men looked at me, giving me everything, giving me all they were.
“To be our wife,” Jareth said.
“To be the mother of our children.” Ryker was the next one to speak.
“To only be ours. Always, Sofie.”
They seemed to say that last part in unison, in sync, as if they were thinking the same thing, wanting the same thing.
And then they pulled me in for an embrace, and I inhaled both of their scents. The aroma was strong and masculine, gentle and loving. It was the smell of all mine.
Everything mixed together in perfect harmony, driving deep into my very core, my very soul.
And as they held me, as I let myself fall fully into this headfirst, I knew everything would be okay.
I knew everything was exactly how it was supposed to be.
Epilogue One
Sofie
Two years later
I sat out in the sunroom, looking at the trees and mountains, breathing in the fresh morning air as it breezed in through the open window.
My eyes were closed as I felt the warmth of the early morning sun washing over me. I only had on a silk bathrobe, the one Jareth had given me for my birthday last year, and a pair of fuzzy slippers Ryker had given me for Christmas.
The sound of birds chirping had me opening my eyes, but all I could see was trees, trees for miles. We’d bought this property two years ago, ten acres in Washington State. It was private, which is what all three of us wanted, open, and picturesque.
Our house had been custom-built, so grand and big that it held the three of us comfortably. It had a main house in the center and two separate buildings attached to that. From the outside, it looked like one grand, rustic estate, but on the inside, it housed three people, two separate families, three different relationships.
A wife and her two husbands.
Ryker had a section on the right, Jareth on the left. And the center was for all of us, our main living area where we could have dinner together, visit, and a place where I could just be with both of them at the same time.
I looked down at my left hand, my ring finger adorned by two platinum bands. I hadn’t wanted diamonds, didn’t want flash. So when both Jareth and Ryker proposed, on the same day, at the same time, I’d been so happy to see the simple yet elegant bands they presented.
And the inscription on the inside of each band was personal, from both of them, something I would cherish forever.
I smiled, feeling like I had the world in my very hands. Who knew a girl like me could have a life like this?
I heard someone approaching and looked over my shoulder to see Ryker come in with a mug in his hand. He gave it to me, and I looked down to see the hot tea and milk. I smiled up at him and brought the cup to my mouth, taking a small sip and closing my eyes, humming at the sweet honey flavor.
He sat down on the chair to my left, and we didn’t say anything. We just stared at the gorgeous view. But nothing needed to be said. It was a perfect, wonderful silence.
I took another sip of my tea and then set it down on the coffee table in front of me. I reached out with my hand and took Ryker’s, twining our fingers together as I rested back fully. It wasn’t too long after that when Jareth came in, a small plate in his hand, a pastry atop that. He had a smile on his face, and I could tell it had nothing to do with me sexually, and everything to do with loving me.
He set my pastry down beside my mug and took up residence in the small plush chair on the opposite side of me. I reached my hand out and took his, holding both my husbands’ hands, feeling like the luckiest woman in the world.
But then they let go, skimmed their palms over my belly, and rested them on the slight swell. I was four months pregnant with our first baby. This was the greatest gift I could ever have—we could ever have. And although I didn’t know who the biological father was, it didn’t matter. Both of them would love this baby as if it were their own.
Because it was theirs. Blood or not, we were all in this together.
I had my two husbands.
They had me.
And we were going to finally be a family and irrevocably connected.
And although it wasn’t perfect all the time, although we had our disagreements, our difference
s, the one thing we had that would never fade… was each other.
We had our love.
Epilogue Two
Sofie
Ten years later
“Deacon and Victor, you better leave Polly alone or it’s no dessert for you after dinner,” I shouted at the twins, who, although younger than their sister by two years, tormented her until I knew she was ready to scream.
“Sorry, Momma,” the boys said in unison and ran off.
Polly huffed out, but there was a thankful expression in her face.
“Dinner in twenty, sweetheart.”
She nodded and went back to tending to the flowers she was planting.
I sat back down and watched the boys run over to the swing set Ryker and Jareth had put together last year. Deacon and Victor, identical twins, both spitting images of Ryker. And Polly, our firstborn, looked exactly like Jareth. Hell, she even had his personality and resting bitch face down to perfection.
Although we’d never done a DNA test, frankly because it didn’t matter to us, we all knew who the biological parents were.
But to be honest, we didn’t care who their father was by blood. Jareth and Ryker took care of the three of them, loved and cherished them, and protected them with their lives as if there was no doubt they’d fathered them all.
I heard the back door open and looked over my shoulder to see Ryker coming out, a tray in his hands, juice boxes for the boys, and three glasses of lemonade for us and Polly. I smiled as he came over and set it down on the patio table, a light breeze moving by us, the wind ruffling the strands of my hair along my shoulders.
“Sweetheart, come and grab something to drink,” Ryker called out to Polly.
She stood and brushed off her knees and then was walking over. Once she was only a foot away, Ryker wrapped his arm around her shoulders and brought her in for a hug. Then he leaned down and kissed the top of her head.