Athena jumped up from the bed and paced up and down the bedroom. Of course one kiss with a notorious playboy nine months ago had meant nothing. But deep down hadn’t it made her realise that there was something missing from her relationship with Charlie? She had ignored her misgivings because the wedding preparations had already been well under way, and by marrying the future Lord Fairfax she had felt she was making up for her parents’ disappointment that she was not the brilliantly academic daughter they had hoped for.
She had convinced herself that she was doing the right thing, but now she felt as though iron bands were crushing her ribs, and she couldn’t breathe properly as her feeling of panic intensified and solidified into a stark truth.
She did not love Charlie with all her heart.
She had been flattered when he had shown an interest in her, and frankly astounded when he had proposed. Her parents had been over the moon that she was going to marry a member of the landed gentry. She remembered that at her engagement party Lexi had warned her that she shouldn’t marry to earn their parents’ approval. She had assured her sister that she loved Charlie, but she had been fooling herself—and probably Lexi, too, Athena thought bleakly.
She took a shuddering breath and ordered herself to calm down. Perhaps if she spoke to Charlie he would be able to reassure her that he loved her and that everything would be all right. It was supposed to be bad luck for the bride to see the groom before the wedding on the day, but she had to see him and be reassured that she was simply suffering from a bad case of nerves.
Charlie’s bedroom was in a private wing of the house. As Athena hurried along the corridor she almost collided with the Fairfaxes’ dour butler, Baines.
‘Master Charles gave strict instructions that he does not want to be disturbed while he is changing into his wedding attire,’ Baines told her in a disapproving tone.
Usually Athena felt intimidated by the butler, but she resisted the urge to slink away back to her room and said coolly, ‘Thank you, Baines, but I must see my future husband.’
The butler looked as though he wanted to argue, but then he nodded his head stiffly and walked away.
She paused outside Charlie’s room and took a deep breath. Just as she was about to knock she heard voices from the other side of the door.
‘This is the last time we can be together for a while. I’m going to have to play the role of devoted husband for the next few months.’
‘I guess so,’ a second voice drawled. ‘It will be unbearable for both of us. You say that Athena wants to try for a child straight away?’
‘Oh, she’s mad keen to have a baby.’ Charlie laughed. ‘She’ll be an ideal brood mare, because to be honest she’s not overly bright or ambitious for a career. I’ll need a few drinks before I bed her, but with any luck she’ll get pregnant quickly and I won’t have to touch her again because all she’ll be concerned about is the sprog—leaving you and I free to carry on where we left off.’
Athena’s hand was shaking so much that she could barely grip the door handle. Had Charlie been joking? Why had he said such horrible things about her to the other person in his bedroom? She recognised the second voice—but it couldn’t be who she thought...
She turned the handle and flung open the door with such force that the heavy oak creaked on its hinges.
‘Athena!’
Charlie’s startled shout reverberated around the room, before fading to leave a deafening silence that was broken by his best man’s amused drawl. ‘Well, that’s let the cat out of the bag.’
‘I don’t understand—’ Athena choked.
But of course she did understand—even though she was ‘not overly bright’. Charlie’s top hat and cravat were scattered across the floor, together with the grey morning suit that he was to wear to the wedding, and he was in bed with his friend Dominic. The best man was also naked—apart from his top hat, which was perched at a jaunty angle on his head.
‘For God’s sake, Athena, what are you doing here?’ Charlie sprang out of bed and hastily thrust his arms into a silk dressing gown.
How ironic that this was the first time she had seen her fiancé’s naked body, Athena thought, swallowing down her hysteria.
‘I needed to talk to you.’ Her earlier doubts about marrying Charlie were nothing compared to the shock she felt now, at seeing him with his best man. ‘Charlie...I...I’ve realised that I can’t marry you. And this...’ her gaze flew to Dominic ‘...this confirms that I was right to have second thoughts.’
‘Don’t be stupid—of course you have to marry me,’ Charlie said sharply as he walked over to her and caught hold of her arm. ‘You can’t back out of the wedding now. My mother would have a fit. And think about how upset your parents would be,’ he added cleverly, going directly for her weak spot. ‘It will be all right, Athena,’ he said, in a more conciliatory tone. ‘Dom and I...’ He shrugged. ‘It means nothing...it’s just a fling.’
‘No, it isn’t. I heard the two of you when I was outside the bedroom. What I don’t understand is why you asked me to marry you when you know you’re—’ she broke off helplessly.
‘Gay,’ Charlie finished for her. He gave a mocking laugh. ‘That’s why I need a wife—to give me an air of respectability. There’s still discrimination against gay men working in the City, and if I came out it would wreck my career. It would also devastate my father if he found out. The shock, so soon after his heart surgery, could finish him off. But if I marry and provide an heir I’ll keep the parents happy and my inheritance safe—coincidentally.’
‘But you can’t live a lie for the rest of your life—and nor can you expect me to,’ Athena said shakily. ‘I realise it will be hard, but you need to be honest about who you are.’
Despite her shock, she felt some sympathy for Charlie’s situation—especially as she knew his father was frail after undergoing a heart bypass operation. But she felt hurt that Charlie had expected her to provide a cover for his true sexual preference.
‘I’m sorry, but I won’t marry you.’
‘You have to.’ Charlie gripped her arm harder to prevent her from leaving the room.
She shook her head. ‘I realised this morning that I don’t love you, and I see now that you have never loved me. Let me go, Charlie.’
‘You need to marry me.’ Desperation crept into his voice. ‘You want children. Who else do you think will want to marry a twenty-five-year-old virgin with a hang-up about sex?’ Charlie said viciously.
Athena paled. ‘Please don’t be nasty, Charlie. Can’t we at least end this as friends?’
His face was mottled red with anger. ‘You silly bitch. If you refuse to marry me you’ll ruin everything.’
She had to get away. From somewhere, Athena found a burst of strength to tear herself out of Charlie’s grasp. As she fled from the room his voice followed her down the corridor.
‘I didn’t mean it. Come back, Athena, and let’s talk. We can work something out.’
She ran into her bedroom and closed the door, leaning back against the wood while her chest heaved as if she had just completed a marathon.
Charlie and Dominic! Why hadn’t she guessed? There had been signs, she realised, but she had simply thought the two men were good friends. No wonder Charlie had said he was happy to wait until they were married before they slept together. He had sensed that she had inhibitions about sex and he had used her—only asked her to marry him so that she would be a smokescreen to hide his relationship with Dominic.
Her stomach churned. What was she going to do? What reason could she give for calling the wedding off, even supposing she found the courage to walk downstairs and face Lord and Lady Fairfax? She would not expose Charlie’s secret relationship with Dominic. He had done an unforgivable thing by trying to trick her into marriage, but it was against her nature to betray him. It was up to Charli
e to be honest with his parents about his private life.
Oh, God, what a mess!
She stared at the phone, feeling tempted to call her sister. Lexi would know what to do. But it wouldn’t be fair to worry her when she was so close to giving birth, and Athena knew that her sister would worry about her. Although Lexi now lived far away, in the desert kingdom of Zenhab, the bond between the sisters had grown stronger since Lexi had married Kadir and become utterly confident of his love.
Voices sounded from out in the corridor, and when Athena opened her door a crack she saw her parents emerging from the guest bedroom across the hall. Her father looked elegant, in top hat and tails, and her mother was wearing a spectacular wide-brimmed hat covered in lilac silk roses.
‘Who would have guessed that our daughter will be related by marriage to royalty?’ Veronica Howard said excitedly.
‘Distantly related,’ her husband pointed out. ‘According to the Encyclopedia of Genealogy Lord Fairfax is a seventh cousin twice removed of the royal family. But, yes, Athena has certainly done well.’
Athena quickly closed the door. Tears filled her eyes. She couldn’t bear to disappoint her parents again, as she had done on many occasions—such as when she had failed to get into university. She was the only Howard not to study at Oxford, as her father had said so sadly.
But the alternative was to continue with the wedding and marry Charlie even though she had discovered the truth about him.
There was another option. You could disappear, whispered a voice in her head. It would be cowardly, her conscience argued. But she felt trapped in a truly appalling situation and in her despair all she wanted to do was run away.
She could still hear her parents’ voices out on the landing. Her only escape route was via the window, but her bedroom was on the second floor, overlooking a gravel path at the side of the house. Although the walls of the house were covered in ivy, and the thick, gnarled stems looked strong enough to support her weight...
Without giving herself time to think, she did at least remember to grab her bag, containing her phone and other essentials that she had packed for when she and Charlie flew to their honeymoon in the Seychelles. She wouldn’t need the daring black lace negligee she had bought for her wedding night now, she thought bleakly.
From the window the ground did not look too far away, but when she climbed out onto the windowsill and grabbed hold of the ivy, the drop down to the gravel path seemed terrifyingly distant. It had been a stupid idea, she acknowledged. She froze with fear, unable to haul herself back through the window, but too afraid to climb down the ivy.
Oh, dear God! She looked down and instantly felt dizzy and sick with terror.
‘Let go and I’ll catch you.’
The voice from below was vaguely familiar, but Athena couldn’t place it. She couldn’t do anything but cling to the twisting vines that were beginning to tear under her weight. Suddenly the ivy was ripped away from the wall—and she screamed as she plummeted towards the ground.
Copyright © 2015 by Chantelle Shaw
ISBN-13: 9781460386378
A Pawn in the Playboy’s Game
Copyright © 2015 by Cathy Williams
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