by Adams, Nancy
“Jordan, what are you doing here?” Faith asked, and the animosity in her voice gave me the distinct impression that this must be Martin’s father.
“Come to see that baby you been tellin’ everybody s’posed to be mine,” he said, confirming my hunch. “I figured I’d see if he look like me, cause some says he do and some says he don’t.”
Nathan was on his feet instantly. “Mr. Prentiss,” he said. “You are not welcome on this property. Leave now, before I call the police.”
Jordan just sneered at him, and turned back to Faith. “So, what? You gonna show me this kid I s’posed to done put up in you, or not?”
Faith was still holding Martin, of course, and Jordan could see him just fine, but she made no move to show him off. “You been tellin’ everybody he ain’t yours, why you wanna know about him now?”
“Maybe I been thinkin’ it’d be nice to have a bitch o’ my own to come home to every night, and a little rug rat playin’ on the floor. Maybe I been missin’ you, ever think about that?”
“Hell, no!” Faith spat at him. “That’d mean you give a shit about someone other than yourself, and we all know that ain’t never gonna happen! Now take your sorry ass on out of here, and leave me and my baby in peace!"
Nathan started toward Jordan, but it was Jack who suddenly stood between Jordan and Faith. “You go on!” he said. “You go on and take your sorry ass on out o’ here, ‘fore we kick it the way we shoulda done two years back!"
Jordan smiled at Jack for just a second, and then he moved like a striking snake. I almost leapt at him when his fist hit Jack in the nose, but I caught myself just in time, realizing I couldn’t show my strength or speed here. Jack fell, and Nathan roared, Albert and George came up out of their chairs—
And Jordan and another man were suddenly holding guns, pointing them straight at Nathan. “One move,” Jordan said, “and this ol’ nigger dead! Now, we gonna leave, and anybody try to follow gonna find out what it’s like to get his head blown off, ya feel me?” He turned to Faith. “This ain’t over, Bitch. I’ma see that baby, and if it be mine, then you and me gonna have to get it together.”
He and the others began backing away, and within a few steps they were out of the light of the fire and into the darkness. I could still see and hear them, of course, and I thought of making an excuse and following after them—but what could I do? If I let them see how strong I was, if I frightened them away, they’d probably only come back with more of their own kind. It was better to let this go, I told myself, better to just stay out of it.
It was nearly midnight by that time, and we all jumped up to see about Jack. His nose was bleeding profusely, and he had tears in his eyes. He was pushing away the hands that were trying to help him up, and struggling to get to his feet on his own. He turned to look for a place to sit down, and suddenly his eyes met mine—and he turned away and walked straight into the building he lived in with his mom and dad.
I wanted to say something comforting, but I didn’t know what it would be. Nathan touched my arm, and I looked at him.
“Don’t be offended, Miss Amber,” he said. “He’s embarrassed that he couldn’t take on the whole bunch of those punks, and I think he’s particular ashamed that you saw it.”
I shook my head. “He shouldn’t be. I know bigger men who don’t have as much courage.”
“I know, and I agree—but Jack is—somewhat taken by you, I’m afraid, and for you to see him knocked down is an embarrassment he can’t deal with so easily. I think he’ll be fine by tomorrow.”
I just nodded. The party was obviously over, and the older folks gradually wandered off to bed. The boys cleaned up most of the leavings, and then they went to find their own beds. A little while later, it was just me and Faith and a sleeping Martin.
Faith looked at me and said, “I’m sorry about that thing with Jordan. He’s Martin’s daddy, the no good...”
I put a hand on hers, to tell her it didn’t matter. “Thank you for inviting me,” I said, and I meant it from the bottom of my heart. I’d needed this, to just feel normal for a little while, and the feeling of being close to these people was something I cherished. I didn’t know if it would last, but I was going to enjoy it while I could.
“Amber, girl, you fit right in! If I didn’t know better, I might think you were wearing whitewash!” I think I went blank, trying to figure out what she meant; whitewash wasn’t new to me, we’d whitewashed the fence outside my house every spring—but why would a person wear it?
Then it hit me, and I busted up laughing. I hadn’t ever had much experience with black people, as I’d said, but I also didn’t have much with racism; Daddy wouldn’t tolerate it. As a result, it never occurred to me that anyone might think she was making a rude or insulting comment about my skin color, and so I threw it right back at her. “Oh, yeah?” I said with a silly leer on my face. “Or maybe you just fell into a big bowl of chocolate pudding!"
She shrieked a laugh, and before I knew it we were both laughing so hard we had tears, and we ended up hugging each other. I air-kissed at her cheek, and then we hugged once more and let each other go. I figured she needed to get Martin into bed, so I faked a yawn and said I was falling asleep. She smiled and rubbed my back for a second, then said, “Okay. You go get some sleep, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Chapter Twenty-eight
Amber
I went into the house, but then slipped out the front door and went to the garage. That pretty red T-bird was waiting for me, and I was tickled when it started up instantly, with a throaty roar that would have delighted Vince and all the other boys back home. I backed out of the garage, took the driveway out to the road and headed for Downtown.
I parked down by the beach this time, and walked back to the mission district. It was no different than it had been on Wednesday night, and I spotted a man fairly quickly who seemed to be as depressed as Sam had been. I approached him, and said I wanted some whiskey, but I was too young to buy it; would he maybe be willing to buy me a bottle, if I shared it with him?
He was willing, all right, especially when I suggested we go down by the water where we could drink it privately, and maybe have some “real fun.” I gave him the money, and he was in and out of a liquor store in minutes.
Naturally, I let him drink the whiskey, and only pretended to drink my share. He didn’t notice, and by the time we’d gone only a few blocks, the bottle was empty and he was getting grabby, ready for the “real fun.” Well, so was I, I suppose; I could feel the hunger burning in me, and the irritability that came with it mixed with the anger I’d felt over what had happened to Jack, and suddenly I didn’t care about giving this man any pleasure. He was the type who would take advantage of a young girl he found in a bad place; he didn’t deserve the easy way out.
I spotted an alley that was dark, and there weren’t any people around, so I led him down into its shadows and got us both stripped down to the bare minimum. He looked me over, and I could tell he was enjoying the view, but I wasn’t interested in what he wanted. I moved in quickly, and he reached for me, but I just grabbed him and bit right into his arm.
He screamed, and while I felt some of the excitement hit me, it wasn’t as good as before, and I didn’t know why. I was hungry, though, so I kept eating, taking most of his chest muscles and almost all the meat of his left upper arm.
But I was still stuffed from the barbecue. I’d eaten way too much, and I hadn’t allowed enough time for that “useless” food to pass from my system, so I simply couldn’t eat as much as I needed to. That made me angry at myself, and I was ready to be done, so I just ripped out his heart and ate it quickly, once more watching his eyes go lifeless as he died.
But I didn’t feel the thrill, that time. There was a strange, frustrated feeling, and I was still upset as I wrapped him up in his clothes and carried his body out into the water. I ripped him apart, and watched him sink to the bottom, then swam back and cleaned myself the best I could before getting dr
essed.
I went home, and gradually I felt better. I was pretty sure the problem was that I hadn’t been able to eat enough, and I was afraid I’d need to eat again sooner than normal.
Oh, well. Lesson learned—I went to my room and curled up with a book.
Simone came in at four-thirty to tell me that Madeline and Jen were leaving us. Madeline was going because she felt that four women in the group was at least one too many—me—and Jen, I was surprised to learn, had been Madeline’s lover for some time, almost since she’d been turned. Lately, though, she’d spent a lot of time talking about me, and Mad was jealous; to make peace and keep things as they were between them, Jen agreed to go where Mad went. They’d both taken their things when they’d left the night before, though Jen had said she wasn’t sure yet if she was going or not. It seemed to me that she must have made up her mind even before they’d gone dead that morning, since she was packed and ready so quickly after rising.
Okay, I’ll admit it; I was hurt! Jennifer had sort of gotten me into this mess, and then she could just run off and abandon me? Yeah, I still had Horace and Rudy and Simone—but still—
Get over it, Amber! I told myself. Jen isn’t your mother, and you don’t need her! You’re a big grue now, so act like one!
Horace came in a little later, and Rudy right after him. Both stopped by my room to tell me the news, though I know they could hear Simone talking to me, and would assume that I already knew.
“It’s for the best,” Horace said, and Rudy nodded. “She never really fit with us, not truly. Seemed I spent half my time trying to keep her out of trouble, and the rest trying to get us out once she brought it on us!"
“But she’s been with you so long,” I said. “And I can’t help wondering, if I wasn’t here, maybe—”
“Don’t start that,” said Horace.
Rudy continued, “Oh, rubbish! Mad’s been broody a lot longer than you’ve been around, Amber, this is naught to do with you. See, Mad likes things rough, and if they get a little too rough now and then, well, it’s no bother to her. She likes bloodshed, as well as blood! Bringing you into it is just her making an excuse for doing what she wants to do anyway!”
Simone was being quiet, and I wondered why, but Horace said, “He’s right. Part of this is Mad’s own desire to do a little ‘real vampire hunting,’ and as long as she keeps it away from us, I won’t interfere with her. She knows that. They’re on the way east, heading for Florida or somewhere else where millions of people conceal the odd disappearance. Let ‘em go; we’ll likely be better off without them.”
He stood to go, and Rudy followed. Simone was quiet, and I wanted to ask her why, but I didn’t want to make her talk when Horace might hear, just in case there was something she wanted to keep to herself. I was about to say something completely unrelated when she whispered, “It was me, at the firsts.”
I didn’t understand. “What?” I whispered back just as quietly.
She looked at me, and I saw tears in her eyes. I hadn’t known she could cry; I hadn’t thought a vampire was capable of it, but here was proof that Mr. Stoker was as full of shit as everyone else who thought they could write about the undead.
“It was me, the one Mad wanted. That’s why Horace didn’t kill me, when he done for Gilbert. Mad wanted me, we was—we was like her and Jen, y’know? She liked kissin’ me, and all, and we—It was me she wanted, at the firsts, but now she’s got Jen, and she’s gone.”
I felt terrible for her, so I did the only thing I could think of, and reached out to pull her close to me. I’d only planned to give her a hug, try to comfort her, but she suddenly was clinging to me, and crying, and then the sun peeked over the horizon and she went limp in my arms instantly.
Simone
When Mad said she was goin’, at firsts I wanted to go with her. It was her what got me through that first few weeks with Horace, helped me learn how to make myself drink just a little bit, not suck someone dry the way Gilbert had shown me. She treated me like she cared, and I learned to love her real quick.
She knew it, too, cause when she started to want more outa me, she knew I’d give in. I woulda let her do anything she wanted, just to keep that feeling, that feeling that she loved me, cared about me. When she started kissin’ me, I was scared, at the firsts, but I didn’t fight it. After a little while, I started to like it, and then she went to touchin’ me, and that was fun, so by the time I was with ‘em a couple weeks, we was lovers.
I hadn’t ever been with a woman before and didn’t know what to do, but she showed me, and she told me I was her girl, her love, and how she’d always love me and want me. Back then, o’ course, neither one of us knew what always really meant. I was young and lonesome, and when she said ‘always,’ I wanted it to be true.
Then, about a hundred years later, Horace found another girl he liked, her name was Marilyn. She found out what we was, and wanted to be turned, and he did it, but then Mad took a shine to her, and they started goin’ round together. Wasn’t a few days before Marilyn didn’t want Horace no more, and then she took to killin’ and wouldn’t stop, so Horace had to kill her.
Mad was in a fury at him over that, but he said she knew the rules. We don’t kill if we can avoid it, but she liked the killin’ more than the blood. Some of us do, I guess, that’s just how it is.
Anyway, when Marilyn was with us, Mad didn’t seem like she had much time for me. I even tried to go in with ‘em, and be pals with both of ‘em, but Mad wouldn’t let me. She wanted Marilyn to herself, and thought I was tryin’ to steal her away.
Nah, not me. I was tryin’ to hang onto what love I could get, and Marilyn took it away from me. I didn’t cry when she was gone, and after a few days, I had Mad back. She was my lover again, and made me feel good, but it wasn’t the same. There was something different, like when you know someone isn’t really who they say they are, y’know?
Then we got Jen, and I liked her, but Mad threw me out like I was dirty water. Jen, she was one who was always lonely, all her life, so she went to Mad same as me, happy to have someone love her and want her.
Wasn’t Jen’s fault, and I never held it against her, but I knew I’d never trust Mad again. When Amber come along, I figured I could be her big sister, and teach her all the stuff she needed to know about livin’ forever, and sex stuff and all that.
But Mad was jealous of Amber, cause Horace never got upset when she killed someone. That’s what it was really all about, and I knew it, and so did Horace and Rudy.
But it still hurt when Mad left me. Left us, I mean.
Amber
I stripped her the rest of the way, then carried her in and gave her a bath in my tub. It didn’t take long to realize that there is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about while giving a bath to a corpse, so I took off my own clothes to keep them dry and washed her quickly. I dried her with one of my own big towels, and was about to put her into my bed when I realized that one of the maids would want to come in and clean my room later. I listened to be sure no one was inside yet, then hurriedly carried her up and put her into her own bed. I tossed covers over her—for absolutely no valid reason I can think of—turned out her lights and rushed back to my own room.
Of course, then I remembered that it was Sunday, and only one of the girls worked on Sunday. I listened for it, and sure enough, I heard Elaine come in about eight-thirty. She would be cook, housekeeper and everything else for the day. I took a shower, threw on a light dress and sandals, then went to say good morning to her.
While I’d been in the shower, Faith had come in, too, and she smiled when she saw me. I got a cup and poured myself coffee as I sat down at the table with them.
“You’re up early,” she said to me, and I put on a sad face.
“I got a little bad news this morning,” I said, then told them about Mad and Jen’s departure. “I didn’t know them all that well, but it seems to be bothering Horace and Simone quite a bit. They’re both pretty broken up about it.”
“Yes,” I admitted, “but I felt sort of a bond, with Jen at least. We—well, we had a sort of a connection.” I didn’t go into detail, of course, but Faith nodded as if she understood. She listened to see if I had anything more I needed to say, and then asked if I had anything to do that day.
I shook my head. “No, not really,” I said, “not ‘til this evening.” I hadn’t been satisfied with my meal the night before, so I figured I’d be paying another visit to the mission district that night.
“Well, Grandpa asked me and Jack to go with him on a shopping trip, today, to get some new curtains and stuff for Mr. St. John. You wanna come along?”
I thought about it for a moment. “How late would we be out? I’ve got something I have to do this evening, and...”
“We’d be back in the afternoon, not too late. Come on, it’ll be fun, and we’ll get lunch at a place you’ll love.”
Lunch; oh, joy, more grossies—I’d have to be sure to let them pass before I fed again later, but the situation with Madeline and Jen did have me a little depressed, and my mother had taught me that shopping was a great antidepressant. I figured that if we were looking at curtains, I might as well do a little redecorating in my own room, too.
“Sure,” I said, “I’d love to. How soon are we leaving?”
“Well, Grandpa said he’d be here in a few minutes, so pretty quick, I’d say. You can go like that, or do you want to change?”
The summer dress I was wearing was comfortable and decent, so I thought it would be okay. I went back to my room to get my purse, and heard Nathan come in as I was going back toward the kitchen. Jack was with him, his nose a little swollen but not broken, and he grinned at me shyly.