by Sarah Noffke
“It will eventually,” Mortimer said with a smile. “Now, what does Liv Beaufont, Warrior for the House of Seven, want today?”
“Well, I know this is a long shot, but I’m looking for a set of weapons by the name of Dequiem. It’s roughly fifty swords that went missing. Can you ask around and have your brownies keep an eye out?”
“I can do one better.” Mortimer began typing wildly on his keyboard. “I’ve upgraded our systems so that we inventory and catalog items of interest. For one, it makes cleaning assignments easier, and secondly, I figured it might be of help to you.”
“Wow, thank you,” Liv said, impressed. “You’ve come a long way from your paper system, haven’t you?”
“Don’t even remind me that I used to be so archaic,” Mortimer said. “It’s a wonder I ever got anything done.”
“I’m sure you’re enjoying the efficiency.”
“Well, I’ll be taking my first vacation in a few hundred years, so I’d say,” Mortimer shared.
“That’s great!” Liv exclaimed. “Where are you going?”
“Disney World,” Mortimer answered. “Pricilla has always wanted to do the teacup ride.”
“Are you two tall enough for that one?” Liv asked, then shook her head. “Never mind. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
He nodded, squinting at the computer. “Yes, it appears that one of my brownies inventoried something they listed as the Dequiem consisting of at least fifty gnome-made swords.”
“Yes, that’s it!” Liv yelped. “Where are they?”
The light expression on Mortimer’s face dropped. “Not a place that most magicians can easily enter, even with your magic. You’ll need one of my brownies to get past the locks.”’
“Actually, I had some modifications made to my sword. Maybe the locks aren’t a problem,” Liv stated. “Where are the weapons?”
“They are located in a secret chamber inside the Tabularium in the Forum in Rome,” Mortimer answered.
“That sounds complicated,” Liv stated.
He nodded. “Yes. It’s a confusing mass of old buildings and ancient ruins. Even knowing where the weapons are won’t make locating them easy.”
“I kind of figured that,” Liv joked.
“Now, I have one of my best located there. If you run into problems, he should be able to help.”
“Thanks,” Liv said. “Is there anything else you can tell me to narrow the search?”
Mortimer studied his screen for a moment. “It appears the weapons are heavily guarded. Be prepared for a fight, but do try to be careful not to damage the structure. It is necessary to preserve it for historical purposes.”
“Got it,” Liv stated. “Fight the beasts, recover the weapons, and don’t torch the ancient runes in Rome. That’s a regular Wednesday afternoon for me.”
Chapter Ten
For some reason, Liv was unable to portal directly into the Forum in Rome. It probably had to do with wards set up centuries before by Romans trying to protect their city from foreign magicians or other magical creatures. However, as Liv stared at the line to get into the Forum, it was a sick joke.
“How am I supposed to get in there?” Liv asked, mostly to herself.
The chicken, who apparently had an opinion on everything, squawked.
“Yes, and the other question is, how am I going to sneak you in there?” Liv grumbled. “I don’t suppose I can drop you off at that café across the way and pick you up later, huh?”
Squawk.
Liv nodded, pretending she understood the complaint. “Yes, I am to keep you safe at all costs. I remember.”
Placing a glamour on the chicken, Liv made her appear to be a toddler in her arms. She would have done that before, but it was a drain on her magic—which meant she needed to get through the security line fast.
Turning to gauge the line into the Forum, Liv caught the sight of the Coliseum in the distance. It was hard to believe these structures had been standing for so long. Their history, or at least the history that had been recorded, was barbaric and strange. And yet, the Romans had preserved them, honoring their past, unlike the magicians, who had covered up the great war, brainwashing those who had lost and even those who had won.
“I’m guessing it’s unlikely that one of these bazillion tourists will allow me to cut in line if I tell them I’m on official business for Father Time,” Liv said in a hushed voice to the chicken.
The chicken apparently had no opinion about that.
“Excuse me, miss,” a guy with slicked-back hair and a leather jacket said in a thick Roman accent. “Do you have your tickets yet?”
“No,” Liv said, looking around for a ticket office. She was going to complain bitterly to Subner about this. The weapons weren’t just held in a place to which she couldn’t portal, but she had to pay in order to get into the area. Liv considered magicking some tickets like she’d done when entering the National History Museum in Los Angeles. However, she was trying to be mindful of her magic use. She had no idea what she’d face to get to the Dequiem set.
“For forty euros, I can sell you a skip-the-line pass,” the man said, leaning in entirely too close.
“That’s not a bad deal for tickets,” Liv said to the chicken, although she appeared to be a freckled little girl with pigtails.
“Oh, that’s just for the skip the line. The tickets are twelve euros,” the man corrected.
“So the pass to get past all these mouth-breathers is almost four times the actual cost of the ticket?” Liv asked skeptically.
“That’s right,” the man said.
“I’m not sure that’s a good deal,” Liv muttered.
“But this isn’t the line to get the tickets. That’s over there. You have to wait in line to get in, and there’s also a separate line to get your tickets at the Coliseum. Then there’s a line to actually get in.”
“I don’t think this math makes much sense.”
“But if you get the skip-the-line pass, then I also have your ticket.”
“Fine,” Liv said, grateful when she pulled her money out and it automatically changed to euros. At least she hadn’t had to exchange currency.
“Now, I’ll just need another fifty-two euros for your beautiful daughter,” the man said, continuing to hold out his hand.
Liv glared at the chicken. “Seriously? I have to pay for you as well? I really think I should have left you at a café.”
The man gave her a startled look.
Realizing her mistake, Liv blushed. “She’s a very mature toddler. Practically raising herself.”
She pulled more money out of her pocket, depositing it into the man’s hand as he gave her the tickets. “Okay, miss. Just get in this line for the Forum, and you’ll be set.”
“Wait,” Liv stammered. “I thought you just sold me skip-the-line passes.”
“I did,” he said proudly. “That made it so you skipped the line at the Coliseum to buy your tickets, but you still have to wait in the security line at the Forum.”
“You Romans are tricky people,” Liv grumbled.
He bowed slightly. “Yes, and I’m most grateful to have been of service to you.”
Liv shook her head, going to the back of the line, which was even longer than before. Behind her, a group of tourists who had no idea what personal space was breathed on her shoulder, talking loudly.
While Liv was standing in the slow-moving line, at least a dozen more vultures came by, trying to sell her tickets and skip-the-line passes. She couldn’t bring herself to ignore them, and instead simply muttered, “No, thanks. I’ve already been scammed once today.”
When Liv was finally at the front of the security line, she realized she was going to have to remove her cape, Bellator, which looked like an umbrella, her belt, and all her other personal belongings from her pockets.
She set the chicken down so she could start the long process of removing her items.
“Miss!” A security guard ran over. “You can’t put
a child on the conveyor belt. She’ll be x-rayed.”
“Oh, right,” Liv said, sort of overwhelmed by mortal security processes. She picked up the chicken and set her on the ground. “You can walk on your own, can’t you, Michelle?”
The chicken squawked twice.
So not Michelle, Liv thought. Got it.
“Remove all your items,” the guard said, pointing at the sheath on Liv’s belt.
“Oh, hell. This is going to take forever.” Liv immediately regretted not using magic to get past all these security protocols. Thankfully, Bellator didn’t set off any alarms when it passed through the machines.
Liv reasoned that she’d used less magical energy glamouring things than if she’d used magic to bypass this process. With her hands full, she worked to put her belt and sheath back on as the chicken clucked and pecked behind her, following.
“I guess we can call this a humbling experience,” Liv said to the bird.
Once she had Bellator back into place and her cloak over her shoulders, Liv set off down the path snaking between the ancient ruins of the Forum.
“Mindy, if you look over here, you’ll see a bunch of old columns,” Liv said to the chicken, who clucked twice in response.
“That’s a good question,” Liv said, pretending she had understood. “The building was built last year, but due to acid rain, has fallen on hard times. It was a convenience mart that sold organic smoothies and selfie sticks to tourists.”
The chicken clucked.
“Yes, you’re probably right that they just call them smoothies in Italy since they don’t pollute their food with chemicals like us Americans.”
The chicken clucked twice loudly.
Liv gave her a startled expression as a group turned around to gawk. It probably sounded like to them like the toddler she was carrying around was having a tantrum. “So you’re not American? Is that what you’re trying to tell me?”
One cluck.
“Okay, well, now we’re making progress,” Liv said, passing by the Arch of Titus. “I know your name isn’t Mindy, Michelle, Dorothy, Jennifer, or Cindy and that you’re not American. Wow, I’ll crack this case in no time at this rate.”
The chicken shook in her arms as if frustrated.
“Yes, that was sarcasm,” Liv stated. “It’s my first language. What’s yours? Chinese? Japanese? Spanish? Oh, man, if you’re not English, I’ve been trying all the wrong names, haven’t I? Is your name Maria? Hana? Chun?”
The chicken squawked twice.
“Okay, well, I’ve got to focus on the task at hand right now, but later, I’ll ask you more questions over a bottle of wine.”
A man standing close by gave Liv a questioning look over his shoulder, obviously having overheard her.
She smirked at him. “Hey, a little wine is good for the child. Besides, when in Rome…”
Liv couldn’t help herself. She laughed at her own joke as she marched past the Basilica di Santa Francesca Romana on her right.
“Seriously, I could really go for some pizza after we finish here,” Liv stated. “You think you can hang out in a highchair and not make too much racket?”
The chicken clucked softly.
“We are making progress,” Liv said. “Although I’m probably going to need my hands free soon. You good with being on the ground?”
The chicken clucked again.
Relieved, Liv set the chicken down. She turned in a complete circle, trying to get her bearings. “So, where is this Tabularium place? I guess I should have gotten a map from that jerk who scammed us with the tickets. I’m sure that would have only cost me another ten euros. Fifteen, if I wanted to skip the line to get the map, right?”
The chicken was busy scratching in the dirt as Liv took in the vastness of the Forum. She felt small as she stared up at the buildings that towered around her. High on a hill, the people who stood up there appeared like tiny ants.
“This place is pretty incredible, but also rather massive,” Liv stated. “I don’t know where to start looking.”
The chicken squawked loudly.
Liv glanced down at the bird and realized she had sketched an arrow in the dirt, which pointed straight ahead.
“Oh, so you know your way, do you?”
A single cluck.
“Does that mean you’re Italian?” Liv asked.
Another cluck.
“Well, looky there,” Liv gushed. “I’ve figured you out.” The light expression on her face dropped. “Oh, no. You were one of those awful vultures who swooped down on tourists selling them skip-the-line passes?”
Two clucks.
“A tour guide for the Forum?”
Two clucks.
“Well, at least I’ve eliminated those options.” Liv continued in the direction the arrow pointed and passed the Basilica Julia. When she was about to keep going, the chicken clucked loudly, scratching at the ground with her feet like a bull about to charge.
Liv halted, pointing at the building. “That’s it? The Tabularium?”
One cluck.
“All right, it’s show time,” Liv said. She put her hand on Bellator and carefully approached the building.
Chapter Eleven
Liv was about to head for the entrance to the Tabularium when she felt a sharp tug on her belt. She glanced down to find Bellator glowing slightly. Deciding to pull out the weapon, she was nearly thrown off balance when the sword swung in her hands like a compass trying to point north.
The tip of the sword pointed at a solid wall of the old building. Giving the chicken a tentative stare, Liv shrugged.
“Does this seem right to you?” she asked the bird.
It looked uncertain.
Holding the sword up next to the part of the wall that almost seemed to be magnetized, Liv tried to understand what she was missing. Could there be a secret door? Giants could see past the glamours on such walls. Liv sort of wished Rory was there right then, although he would have probably been doting on the chicken and giving her shit for getting scammed.
Holding Bellator like a key, Liv pushed it into the stone wall, expecting it to meet the hard surface. Instead, the large sword transformed into a small dagger and slipped into the solid stone. Turning it to the left, Liv heard a click. She pushed, and a creaking sound emanated.
Giving the chicken an impressed look, Liv pulled Bellator from the lock, and it instantly went back to its normal form. “Did you know about this entrance, Italian?”
The chicken squawked twice.
“Well, if you don’t mind, I’m going first,” Liv stated. “Stay close, chicken, and try not to be a distraction.”
It was hard to believe Liv was entering an ancient building with a chicken. These sorts of situations should have been second nature by now, but the peculiarity of her life never got old.
When she stepped through the seemingly solid wall, Liv was greeted by total darkness. Holding up her hand, she created a fireball, which she’d learned how to harness so that they were torches as well as weapons.
“I’m guessing this isn’t a place they allow tourists,” Liv whispered to the chicken when she stepped into the passageway.
In the distance, she heard a gentle dripping sound. The smell of moisture was strong in the air, with an undertone of waste. It reminded Liv of one of the many times she’d had a case involving hanging out in a sewer system. Early in her career as a Warrior, Adler had constantly assigned her what she called “shitty” cases involving sewer systems. Liv could now brag that she knew the tunnels under many major cities better than the streets of Los Angeles.
Using Bellator as a compass, Liv held it in front of her in one hand, the fireball in the other. It directed her to the right when the tunnel split. Then to the left, and then down some steps. A cold draft hit Liv as she descended farther into the darkness.
Checking to ensure the chicken was keeping pace, Liv turned around. Not only was the bird right on her heels, but she pecked her in the calf, creating a sharp pain.
> “Ouch! What did you do that for?” Liv asked, scowling at the animal.
It opened its beak, but nothing came out. Instead, horror radiated in the bird’s eyes as it peered at something on the other side of Liv.
She froze and tensed. Listened to the sharp hissing at her back. “There’s a snake behind me, isn’t there?”
The chicken nodded its head slightly.
“Is it big?” Liv asked in a whisper.
Another nod.
“Damn it,” Liv breathed. “I freaking hate snakes.” She had faced a lophos when she was tracking down the canisters of magic. Things hadn’t gone that well with that snake. She hadn’t defeated it as much as tucked tail and run like hell through a portal. Facing another serpent wasn’t Liv’s idea of fun, but she guessed this was the monster guarding the weapons.
The monster lashed out at her, his tongue nearly connecting with her face. She ducked, feeling like a fish in a small pond. Liv brought Bellator up, and then she got her first clear vision of the monster.
It was massive.
And gross.
And scaly.
And somehow completely beautiful. Liv had never seen an anaconda like the one she was staring at. It was scary and stunning. It was beyond her imagination. She instantly wanted to pet the creature, but she knew it was much more powerful than her and would probably not be okay with her advances.
It was strange, because she knew anacondas were from the Amazon, yet this beast was here. The creature, which was as big around as a tree trunk, swayed back and forth. Liv was pretty certain that was what they did just before they squished a person or whatever they did. She had limited experiences with anacondas…well, none really.
She threw the fireball in her hand at the monster, but it swiveled to the right just before it hit, avoiding the missile. Liv created another fireball just as the other one extinguished on a back wall, plunging her into darkness again. She couldn’t swing Bellator and also hold a fireball. Choices.
The snake’s tongue flicked out of its mouth as it rose upright, towering high above her. It didn’t appear the least bit intimidated by the fire, making Liv think that it might not harm the beast. There was only one way to find out.