by Megyn Ward
I want to ask what that means, what he has Gray working on for him, but I don’t, and he doesn’t offer to elaborate.
“Okay, so…” I swallow hard and make a conscious effort to unclench my fists that are balled up in my lap. “What about me? I can hold down the fort while you’re gone.” A few minutes ago, I’d been making plans to close up shop and ghost everyone and everything in my life. Now here I am, digging myself in even deeper. And fuck me if Jane Halstead doesn’t have something to do with that.
“You?” I try not to feel annoyed by the skeptical tone that’s wrapped around his one-word answer, but it doesn’t work. I’m annoyed. More than annoyed. I’m suddenly angry.
“Why not me, motherfucker?” I shoot back, turning in my seat to face him head on. “Maybe I’m not an ex super-soldier like Gray or a fight club junkie like Jase but I can handle business if I have to.”
“That’s not what I—” Tobias shakes his head, shooting me a quick, irritated frown. “I know who you are, Logan. I know you’d protect Silver and the kids with your life. I know that,” he says, lifting his hand off the steering wheel to give his face a quick, irritated swipe. “Hell, you’d murder me if you thought I posed a threat to them.” When he says it, he doesn’t sound angry. Actually, he sounds almost proud of the fact. “But you disappear. You just leave and I can’t—”
Hearing the truth stings. That my disappearing acts have made me unreliable. Unworthy of my brother’s trust. It bothers me. Makes me angry. “I won’t,” I tell him, and I mean it. “I’ll stay this time, I promise.” When he doesn’t answer me right away, I can feel my chest get heavy. The hinge on my jaw tighten. “I can do this. Let me do this.” I’ll probably regret it later, once I’ve had a chance to analyze what I’m asking for. The magnitude of the promise I’m making him. The position I’m putting myself in but right now, I don’t care. My brother needs me, and this is my chance to help him. To give something back to him and I’m going to take it. “I’m serious, Tob. Let me do this.”
“Silver can’t know,” he tells me with another skeptical head shake as he rolls the Rover to a stop in front of my dilapidated building. “If she even suspects for a second that I set her up with a babysitter, she’ll hop the pond, curb stomp me, and throw my body in the Thames,” he reminds me with something that sounds like pride.
Thinking of the set of keys Patrick gave me and the offer that came with them, I shake my head. “That’s not going to be a problem,” I tell him before casting a quick, surveying glance over my shoulder at the third-row seats behind Noah and the baby’s car seats. “Those seats fold down, right?”
“Uhhh…” Tobias shifts the Rover into park and aims his gaze in the same direction as mine. “Yeah, why?”
“Good,” I tell him, popping the passenger side door open to drop one of my shoes on the curb. “I’ll explain while you help me pack up.”
Twenty-Three
Jane
Tuesday morning, I came into work to find a sticky note stuck to my computer screen with neat, block lettering I’ve come to recognize as Patrick’s, stretched across it.
For your files:
Address change for Logan Bright
P.
Underneath the note was an address for a Back Bay apartment building.
My apartment building.
It’s Thursday now and I’ve spent the last three days driving myself absolutely crazy trying to figure out when and why Logan moved into my apartment building.
The why is a little easier to figure. Tobias left for London without so much as a scowl on Tuesday morning, and I’d bet my next paycheck it had everything to do with the fact that his brother is my new neighbor.
My new neighbor that I haven’t so much as caught a glimpse of since we played doctor in Silver’s kitchen on Monday night.
Watching Logan move around the kitchen, helping Noah finish up dinner after throwing away the lemons I ruined and shooing me off to the living room, was oddly sensual. His, long, well-muscled limbs carried a sort of loping grace that made me wonder what he’d be like in bed. If he fucks the same way he does everything else, with a strange mix of haphazard laziness and focused precision.
I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.
He must’ve noticed because as soon as he was finished helping Noah clean up the dinner mess and put leftovers away, he announced he was leaving. After a quick squabble with Tobias about not wanting to borrow one of his cars, they left together, Tob fishing a set of keys from the bowl by the door with a muttered curse. Logan followed him out the door after dropping a quick kiss on Silver’s upturned cheek and a hope your finger feels better aimed in my general direction.
I haven’t seen him since, even though he’s apparently been living in my apartment building for the last seventy-two hours.
“You okay?”
“What?” I look up, cheeks stained a bright red like I was caught watching porn on my work computer, to find Declan looking at me from the other side of my desk. “I’m fine,” I tell him quickly, barely curbing the urge to rip the sticky note off my computer screen and crumpling it in my fist. “Are you fine? I’m fine.”
“Yeah.” He gives me a slow nod, the corner of his mouth kicked up in a smirk. It’s almost a smile which is rare for Declan. The only person he usually smiles at is Tess. “I’m good—but I haven’t been staring at a post-it note struck to my computer screen for the past fifteen minutes without blinking, so…” Declan shrugs. “You sure you’re okay?”
I nod. Since he already knows what I’m looking at, I allow myself to reach out and peel the note off the screen. “I’m just wondering why—” I feel my face fold into a wince. “I mean, when Logan Bright moved into my building,” I say, flashing him the sticky note for good measure.
Declan leans over my desk to peer at the hot pink square stuck to my fingers. “You live there?” he says like it’s news to him. “Huh—well, it’s not that big of a mystery. With Tobias and Silver getting ready to move, Cap’n figured—”
“Tobias and Silver are moving?”
“Well… yeah.” Declan’s smirky half smile slowly dissolves under the tone of my voice. “I mean, not right away. Patrick’s still in the process of drawing up plans and Tobias is still undecided between potential build sites but, eventually, yeah—they’re moving,” he tells me, his broad, muscular shoulders sagging a little bit as he reads my body language. “And you had no idea—shit.”
Nope.
I had no idea.
I don’t know why I feel like it’s a betrayal. I really don’t. I mean, Tobias moved into Silver’s two-bedroom apartment almost a year ago and they just had their second child. The place was cozy when it was just Silver and Noah. Add Tobias and the new baby and cozy has become cramped. Cramped will eventually become uninhabitable.
I know that.
“Jane.”
I look up again to find Declan looking down at me, that smirk of his long gone. I’ve heard stories about him. About what an asshole he is. How much he enjoys hurting people—especially his younger brother. If I’d been undecided before about what kind of person Declan Gilroy is, I wouldn’t be anymore. He knows he upset me and he’s miserable about it.
“It’s okay.” I shake my head at him while plastering a smile on my face for good measure. “Really—it’s fine. Silver mentioned it to me a while ago, but it must’ve slipped my mind.”
“Okay.” I’m lying and he knows it but instead of calling me on it, Declan gives me another small, half smile, this one as forced as mine. “What are you doing tonight?” he asks, quickly amending his question when it wipes the fake smile off my face completely. “It’s Thursday—Ladies Night at Gilroy’s. Tess and the girls will be there, hatching some sort of evil plot, I’m sure.” He visibly relaxes once I realize he’s not asking me on a date. “You should come—you can say hi to your new neighbor.”
“Logan will be there?”
Jesus, can I be any more obvious?
You mean like tel
ling your boss and his girlfriend that you have the hots for Logan and asking if he’s available?
Because that was pretty friggin’ obvious.
“Yup—he’ll be there,” Declan assures me with another half-smile. “He’s usually the one who keeps Con and me from killing each other behind the bar. Whaddya say, Jane—want to hang out with the cool kids?”
“I’ll think about it,” I say, giving him a vague smile to go with my non-committal answer. I don’t want to commit to anything that might involve Logan, especially considering what I’m about to do. “Would you mind if I take a long lunch?” I ask, even though I already know the answer. Logan was right—one of the reasons I work for the Gilroys is because they let me take time off whenever I ask for it. Probably because the only time I ask is when Silver needs my help with Noah. Like I knew he would, Declan smiles and gives me a shrug.
“Sure,” he says, rapping his knuckles on my desk before he backs away from it. “Matter of fact, take the rest of the day—we don’t have any clients coming in.”
Usually I argue when they offer. Insist I can’t do that. That I’ll be back and work late to make up for the time. This time I don’t. This time I just say a quick thanks, log out of my computer, grab my purse and leave.
Twenty-Four
Logan
When Silver answers the door, she gives me an exasperated smile. “You’ve got to stop, Logan,” she tells me, her tone caught somewhere between affection and frustration. “If you insist on checking up on me ten times a day, at least use the key, I know Tobias gave you.”
“Tob didn’t give me a key.” He totally gave me a key but I refuse to use it unless there’s an emergency. Key or not, coming in here uninvited feels too much like breaking and entering. Too much like creeping around in places I don’t belong. Too much like my father. “And I’m not here to check up on you. I’m here to borrow a car. I have—"
“Come in,” she says, opening the door wide enough for me to pass through. As soon as I clear the doorway, Silver shuts the door behind me with a quiet clap. “Take your pick,” she tells me, waving her hand over the bowl of jumbled fobs and keys on the entryway table next to her like a magician about to pull a rabbit out of a top hat. “And keep them this time.”
“Can’t.” I shake my head at her and avoid eye contact while I fish through the bowl. Turns out Tob’s Range Rover is the least obnoxious car he owns. Finding its keys, I snap them up and jiggle them at her. “Tob says I have to return them after I use them, each time,” I tell her with another shrug. “Something about insurance premiums or whatever.”
“You’re full of shit,” Silver tells me with a quiet laugh. “I just want you to know that. You and that meddlesome, over-protective man of mine are both full of shit. First, he somehow magically gets you to move into his old apartment, the night before he’s supposed to leave for London and now, he has you borrowing his car five times a day.” Crossing her arms over her chest she narrows her luminous gray eyes on my face. “You’re not fooling me.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Jamming the set of keys into the front pocket of my jeans, I give her another shrug, this one coupled with a wide-eyed look. “All I know is that Patrick showed up at my place, Sunday afternoon and offered me a job supping the building—five hundred a week, plus rent,” I tell her, lifting a hand to run it over the top of my head. “I said yes—would’ve been an idiot not to.” I don’t tell her I almost did. I almost told him no. That I’d had every intention of telling Patrick no, hell no, and that when I came here Sunday night, it was with every intention of telling Tob that I was leaving Boston again, for good this time. Instead, I somehow ended up doing exactly what I told myself I wouldn’t.
I dug myself in deeper.
Because my brother needed my help.
Oh, is that why you decided to stay? Are you sure it isn’t because of a certain green-eyed busybody who just happens to live twenty yards from where you’re standing?
“You mean the Sunday I walked into my kitchen to find you holding hands with Jane?” Silver says, like she can read my mind and knows that her best friend has been on it since the day we met.
“We weren’t holding hands,” I mutter, dropping my hand away from my head on a sigh because it’s my turn to be frustrated. “She almost chopped her goddamned finger off. I was rendering first-aid.”
“Rendering first—” Silver slaps a hand over her mouth to trap a loud bark of laughter inside of it. Tossing a look down the hall, she’s still and quiet for a moment, making sure she didn’t wake the baby. Deciding she’s safe, she drops her hand and shakes her head at me. “Give me a break—just admit you like her already.”
“Jesus…” I say it under my breath, careful to keep my voice down. “I barely know her.”
“So?” Silver serves me back a shrug and cocks her head slightly to the side. “I didn’t say you wanted to marry her—I said you liked her.” Head still cocked, she narrows her gaze on my face. “Maybe a little more than just like her,” she says, reading my expression perfectly. “And you don’t just barely know Jane—I don’t know much about you but I know that much, at least.”
“Can we stop talking about this, please?” I ask, uncomfortable with the sudden scrutiny I’m under.
“No.” Silver shakes her head and stacks her hands on her hips. “No, we can’t. If you insist on knocking on my door every hour, on the hour, with one lame excuse after another, waking my baby and making me get up to answer it, then we’re gonna talk about whatever I want to talk about.”
I didn’t think about that. That knocking would wake Beth or that it might be difficult for Silver to answer the door when I stop by.
Shit.
“Okay, okay… I’ll use the key, alright?” I hold up my hands in surrender. “Happy?”
“The key Tobias gave you.”
I give her a stiff-necked nod in surrender. “So, I can borrow the car without bothering you—not so I can check up on you.”
“If that’s the case, then there’s no reason you can’t keep the Rover keys at your place,” she says with a decisive head nod.
“No.” I shake my head, refusing to budge on the issue. “They aren’t mine and I’m not keeping them.”
“Okay, fair enough…” Silver leans into me just a bit. “Then tell me how you and Jane know each other and we’ll call it even.”
Shit.
“I don’t know what you mean.” I shake my head, each turn of it slow and tight. “I met Jane a week ago—you were there.” Since it has the benefit of being true, I don’t feel bad saying it to her. “That’s the first time I ever laid eyes on her.”
“She called you Matthew,” Silver tells me, killing any hope I had of her post-labor haze muddling her recollection of that day. “She called you Matthew, you took off like the room was on fire and she chased after you.”
Christ.
“I have a few errands to run—want me to pick Noah up from school on my way home?” I ask instead of answering her question.
“No, my brother’s going to get him for me today,” she says, waiting a beat before continuing. “Just so you know, I asked Jane the same question and she refused to answer me, same as you.”
I should be angry.
I should want to strangle Jane for making a mess of my life. Kicking over every freakin’ rock she can find. Threatening to expose every secret I have to the light.
Threatening to expose me.
Instead of angry, I’m just grateful she kept her mouth shut. Kept her promise to her mother not to discuss my case with anyone.
“I don’t know what to tell you, Silver,” I say. “Like I said, I had no idea who Jane was before that day at the hospital.” Clearing my throat, I give her a nonchalant shrug before changing the subject. “Need me to stop by the grocery store or run any errands for you while I’m out?” I ask, reaching for the door to make my escape.
Silver shakes her head at me as I pull the door open and step into the hal
l. “I can’t think of anything but if I do, I’ll text,” she tells me, leaning against the doorframe and into the hall to watch me walk away. “And I know something’s going on between the two of you so, when you’re ready to tell me the truth, I’ll be ready to listen.”
Twenty-Five
Jane
There’s inquisitive and curious and then there’s invasive and obsessed.
That’s what I’ve become over the last week when it comes to Logan Bright.
Invasive and obsessed.
Seriously, if he ended up calling the cops on me, I wouldn’t blame him.
Not one little bit.
Knowing that doesn’t stop me though.
Doesn’t even slow me down.
Instead of stopping, giving up and accepting that he’s either not home or looked through the peephole and, seeing it was me on his doorstep, decided to leave me here, I knock again.
And again.
Then I remember the key.
Tobias gave it to me last summer when this was his apartment, so I could take Noah swimming in the private rooftop pool he had installed. It’s still on my key ring. I’ve used it dozens of times.
Yeah, with permission, Jane. You definitely don’t have permission to do what you’re thinking about doing. Tobias gave you that key so you could keep his kid entertained and get a tan. Not so you could commit B&E on his little brother.
Convincing myself that it won’t even work, that surly the locks were changed when Tobias moved out and in with Silver months ago, I separate the key to Logan’s new apartment from the rest on my ring and shove it into the lock.
Taking a deep breath, I give it a twist.
The lock turns.
Holy shit.
It worked.