by Robin Roseau
"The bride-" Georgia started to say.
"I know, but I lost a little wager. Even if she cheated. So you are to ignore anything I say about any of the bridal dresses. Lara's opinion is the one that matters. Lara will be wearing a tuxedo. We haven't talked about your shop, so I don't know. Is this where we're also getting Lara's tux?"
"Yes," Lara said.
"Georgia, I presume you can fit my future wife in a tuxedo that will properly display her feminine features and amazing body."
Georgia smiled. "Absolutely."
"Good. Lara gets to pick my dress, but I get to pick everyone else's outfit." I introduced Elisabeth next. "Elisabeth is going to look lovely in the bridesmaid dress I pick for her. I think some frills here." I gestured to Elisabeth's chest. "I want to see some proper cleavage. And to help add some feminine curves, a big bow right here." I patted Elisabeth's lower back.
Georgia's face grew tight. "I'm not sure-"
I made sure Elisabeth couldn't see, and I winked at Georgia, then I stamped my foot. "I am the bride! It is my wedding!"
"Yes, of course," Georgia said.
Elisabeth growled at me, quietly enough only I could hear.
I introduced Angel next, indicating her dress should complement Elisabeth's, also with a big bow. Angel looked glum.
Francesca was next. "Francesca is Lara and Elisabeth's aunt, but I hope she will serve as surrogate mother to both brides."
Francesca wasn't expecting that, and I watched her reaction. It took a moment, but then she smiled warmly. "Michaela-"
"Will you?" I asked her.
She nodded. "Yes."
"She'll need an appropriate dress," I said. "No bow."
"Thank god," Francesca said.
Scarlett was last. "Scarlett will be attending as Angel's date," I explained. "She doesn't need a bridesmaid dress, but I'd like to see her in something sleek and elegant that releases her natural beauty. Do we get that here as well or will you send us elsewhere?"
"I am certain we can dress Scarlett," Georgia assured me.
"All right," I said. I released Lara's arm and crossed to Georgia, putting my arm around her. "Let's you and I talk tuxedos." I pulled her away, and when the rest of the women tried to follow us, I glared at them. I pulled Georgia as far away as I could then said very quietly, "From my size compared to theirs, you can guess I am the one who gets picked on. They've all be teasing me lately. Will you help me tease them back?"
"Please tell me you aren't going to make the bridesmaids dress like that."
"Elisabeth in a tux to complement Lara's. Angel in a dress to complement mine."
Georgia smiled. "I'm sure we can mock together several hideous examples before you let them off the hook."
"I think I'm going to like you," I told her. "I want pictures of Elisabeth wearing something horrible. I know her size will be a challenge."
"To be clear, I will not actually make anything horrible."
I laughed. "I wouldn't want you to. I love my future sister-in-law. But she is due some payback."
Georgia laughed lightly.
"How does this work?" I asked her.
"We have a lounge waiting for you," she said. "We'll bring dresses in. There's a screen for you to dress behind. Normally we pick the bride's dress first, then everything to complement."
"All right, but I want to torture Elisabeth first, while I'm fresh enough to enjoy it."
Georgia moved all of us into a large, comfortable lounge. The decor was white, and there was a large sectional sofa for us to lounge on. One of her assistants poured champagne for each of us; they weren't sure what to do about Scarlett and Angel. Lara took care of that by taking my glass from me and handing it to Angel, handing hers to Scarlett, and the assistant poured new glasses for us.
"Let's start with the bridesmaids' dresses then," Georgia announced, once we were comfortable. I was curled up next to Lara and pretending to ignore the looks Elisabeth was giving me. "If you two would both stand up, please."
"Please don't make me wear a bow on my butt," Angel said.
"Be a good scout," Lara told her.
"Yes, Lara," Angel said.
Georgia walked around both of them. Assistants came forward and took their measurements. "We will get more exact measurements later; these will serve for the samples we bring forth. If you ladies will relax for a few minutes, we can bring out the first dresses."
Georgia and her assistants stepped away. Elisabeth and Angel conferred. "She wouldn't really," Angel asked.
"I don't know," Elisabeth said.
Scarlett's purse rang, and I reached out my hand. Scarlett dug through the purse, found the offending phone, and handed it to me.
"That's mine," Francesca said, and I immediately passed it to her, but I kept an eye on the phone. She spoke for a minute or two then handed the phone back to Scarlett. I watched it go back into the purse.
Georgia came back several minutes later, her assistants in tow. They were wheeling a rack with dresses on it. Georgia pulled out the first. "We don't have these in either of their sizes, but we have a few others they can try on shortly. Now, here is our first recommendation." She pulled a dress off the rack. It wasn't horrid. Not really. Georgia described the dress and showed off the bow, prominently displayed on the back.
"Can you hold it up in front of Angel?" I asked.
"Of course."
I pursed my lips. "Hmm. I like the bow," I said. "But I think something a little frillier across the chest."
If looks could kill, I'd have been dead right there.
The dress went back. The next one had a frilly chest, and it was horrid, but there was no bow. Georgia showed us each of the dresses, each more horrible than the last. I commented on what I liked and didn't like for each, and I took what were already horrible dresses and made them worse. Angel at least was willing to wear a dress, but Elisabeth had donned a permanent scowl and I could hear her heart pounding in her chest.
"You know, Georgia, I think I need to see them wearing something. Can you help with that? I know their sizes are somewhat unusual."
"I'm sure we can do something," she said. She wheeled the cart of dresses out. One of the assistants started to refill our champagne glasses, but before she could get to me I stood up as if I were stretching my legs. The assistant followed after me, and I told her quietly, "I would like to switch to non-alcoholic. I am a total lightweight."
"Of course," she said. "We have a special vintage waiting for you."
"Excellent."
I wandered the room while waiting for Georgia to return and soon found a glass of sparkling grape juice in my hand. When Georgia returned, I sat back down next to Lara.
"We'll need to make some adjustments to achieve the look you desire," she said. "But we have two base dresses to begin with. Ladies, if you will step behind the screens, my assistants will help you change."
Angel tossed me a look of despair when she saw the dress she was about to put on. Elisabeth glared at Lara before disappearing behind the screen.
"Enjoying yourself, Francesca?" I asked.
"I admit, I am a little nervous," she said.
"Oh, your daughter is going to look divine!" I said. "Trust me."
Scarlett's purse rang again. She fished out a phone and handed it to me. Lara glanced at it. "That's Elisabeth's." I handed it to Lara. I ignored the call as Lara handled whatever it was, but I made sure the phone went back into Scarlett's purse.
Elisabeth and Angel were both grumbling loudly enough for me to hear them. Angel was dressed first but said, "I'm not coming out!"
"You already came out earlier this year," I replied immediately. There were several chuckles. "Get your butt out here, Angel."
She poked her nose around the screen. "Michaela, please-"
"Front and center," Lara told her in a commanding tone. "You too, Sister!"
Slowly they both slinked from around their screens. Angel looked mildly ridiculous, but it would have been difficult to make Elisabeth
look worse. I was going to try. I didn't see a bow on her butt yet.
I made them both turn around slowly. Georgia stepped forward and described the features from these dresses they would use and what they would change. She succeeded in making them sound even worse.
"All right," I said. "Is there some way you can pin a big red bow right here," I said, pointing to the small of Elisabeth's back.
"Of course," Georgia said. She gestured, and an assistant stepped forward with a bow and a set of pins in her mouth. She stepped up behind Elisabeth, who tried to squirm away from her. The assistant pinned it in place, and I made a point of walking slowly around Elisabeth.
I looked at Georgia. "You know what would make this dress really unique? Two bows! Maybe a nice pink one just below the red one. No! Wait! Fuchsia! Can you do a fuchsia bow so I can see it?"
"We have pink," Georgia said. "I don't know if we can do fuchsia today."
I sighed. "Well, show me pink then."
Lara was having a hard time keeping a straight face. The assistants looked truly horrified, but they did what they were told. Elisabeth looked like she was wondering how she was going to pay me back. Angel and Scarlett both just looked sick.
But Elisabeth stood still and let the assistant pin a second bow in place.
Elisabeth moved in front of a mirror and looked at herself. I knew she hated it as much as the rest of us. She turned to look at her backside and then she caught my eye in the mirror, examining me carefully. She began to smile. Maybe I'd gone too far, and she realized I was bluffing.
I walked over to her and carefully examined her bottom. "Georgia, I think maybe two bows aren't quite it. I guess that was a bad idea. Let's lose the top one; we'll keep the pink one right over her ass. I like that better."
Elisabeth's grin disappeared as the assistant removed the offensive bow.
I walked around both of them, pulling Elisabeth back to the center of the room and turning her around a few times. Finally I said, "Lara, what do you think?"
"I think I'm keeping my mouth shut," she said.
"Francesca?"
Francesca paused before speaking very carefully. "I'm not sure that entirely suits Elisabeth."
I sighed. "I suppose you agree with her, Elisabeth."
"Yes," Elisabeth said.
"I suppose you would rather wear something else."
"Yes."
"Perhaps a tux."
Elisabeth looked at me intently. "I knew you wouldn't actually make me wear this!"
"You want to wear a tux?" She nodded. "All right, on one condition."
"What?"
I pulled my phone out of my pocket. "Pictures."
"No way!" She started backing away from me. "There's no way you'd ruin your own wedding by making me wear this."
"You're right, Elisabeth. But I am perfectly willing to put you in something a little less garish. But there will be a bow on the butt. Do you think I'm bluffing?"
She stared at me. I smiled serenely. Finally she said, "I can't tell."
"Lara, am I bluffing?"
"No," she said. "Sister, she's serious."
"So that's your choice, Elisabeth: Pink dress with a pink bow, in public, in front of hundreds and hundreds of people. Or you can wear the tux and I take a few little pictures."
"What are you going to do with them?"
I grinned and didn't answer.
She sighed. "Tux," she said.
I didn't wait but immediately began taking pictures. I took a half dozen, then checked over them. "Please, Georgia, get that thing off of her, would you?"
"Gladly," she said, pulling Elisabeth behind her dressing screen.
I turned to Angel. She was smiling. "May I please change out of this dress, Michaela? Or do you want photos first?"
"Scarlett already saw you in it," I said. "I suppose I could take them and show them to the boys if I ever need blackmail material."
Angel's smile faltered for a moment, then she shrugged, resigned to whatever fate I dished out.
"Go change, Angel," I told her. "But the next time Lara tries to lure you into one of her plans to embarrass me, remember that I did not take pictures when I could have."
Angel grinned and immediately disappeared behind her screen. I sat back down on the sofa and said, "Scarlett, please hand me your purse." I took the purse and set it in my lap then clandestinely emailed myself the pictures I'd taken of Elisabeth. I worried that Elisabeth or Karen could hack my phone and delete the photos, so I hoped they didn't consider I might have emailed them. I changed my phone's unlock password then powered it off and slipped it into Scarlett's purse. I held the purse until Angel and Elisabeth both came back out from behind the screens, dressed in their original clothes.
I handed the purse to Lara.
"What am I doing with this, Michaela?" she asked.
"Whatever you want," I said. "Pass them back out. Hold them yourself. Ask Scarlett to keep them. It's up to you."
"And if I pass them out, and everyone takes photos of you?"
"It's not a trap, Lara," I told her. "Your choice, and I am fine with whatever you decide." I sipped my grape juice.
Lara looked at me for a moment then opened the purse. She dug through it and found her phone, slipping it into her pocket. "You really don't mind?"
"No," I said.
I could tell she wasn't sure.
"What do you want?" I asked her.
"Honey, I want pictures."
I smiled. "All right. I will ask that people delete any that aren't entirely decent. And I don't know the politics of early release of the dresses we see today." I shrugged.
Lara pulled out a phone. "Mine," Angel said. Lara looked at me, but I simply looked away. She handed Angel her phone, and I didn't react, so one by one, she handed out the rest of the phones. With the rest of the phones returned to their owners, Lara offered mine to me.
"Will you keep that for me?" I asked. "Please don't let Elisabeth have it though."
"Damn it," Elisabeth said.
Lara chuckled and slipped my phone into her pocket, then returned Scarlett's purse to her.
"We may really take pictures?" Angel asked.
"If Lara lets you," I said.
After that, I did whatever either Lara or Georgia told me to do. Georgia seemed very pleased to have my body to fit rather than Elisabeth's. She had countless dresses in sizes approaching mine, although many of them were far too busty for me.
Georgia conferred with Lara after the first three dresses. She was speaking quietly, but I could hear every word. Lara knew it, too.
"Angel," I said. "Do you have your ear buds?"
"No," she said. "I'm sorry."
"I do," said Scarlett. "Well, I have mine."
"Angel, do you have your music on your phone, or just on your iPod?"
"On my phone, too," she said. So I borrowed Angel's phone and Scarlett's ear buds. Angel seemed sad to lose control of her phone, but I suggested she could borrow Scarlett's for photos. I stuck the ear buds in my ears, found Angel's retro music on her phone, and turned the volume up until I couldn't hear Lara talking to Georgia anymore. Lara flashed me a smile. I could hear normal conversations, but not whispered anymore.
I tried on dress after dress. I didn't even bother with the screens; I stood in the middle of the room and let the assistants do to me whatever they wanted. From time to time, Lara asked me what I thought about the dress I was wearing. I found something pleasant to say about each of them.
I wouldn't have picked any of them. Oh, they were all gorgeous and I was sure, amazingly expensive. I'm sure I would have looked stunning in almost any of them.
One of the assistants put my hair up. I frowned, but I let her do it. I tried on more dresses, some of them repeats. And then I reached up and removed the pins from my hair, letting it cascade down over my shoulders again. I looked at Lara and said one word. "Please."
She nodded.
They wheeled out another rack of dresses. I was standing in my und
ies and bra, Angel's phone in one hand. The assistant handed me my champagne glass, freshly refilled with more grape juice. I sipped from it then sat down next to Lara.
She said something, but it was said quietly, and I didn't hear her. I pointed to the ear buds and shrugged. Lara reached over and gently removed them from my ears. "How many of those have you had?" she asked, gesturing to my glass.
"Um. Four. Five? I'm a little nervous."
She took it away from me.
"Hey! Get your own!" I reached for it, but she pulled it away.
"You've had enough," she said.
I sighed. "You think I'm tipsy?" I hiccupped.
"I think you're beyond tipsy."
"Wager. Francesca to judge."
"What do you want? I am picking your dress. That's not on the table. What do you want?"
"You to start teaching me about all your businesses." I looked at Elisabeth. "And she teaches me hers. And both of you start teaching me about the politics."
Lara smiled. "And if I win, you stop complaining about the wolf licks."
"Agreed. The wager is, I am no more tipsy than if I've had one glass of champagne."
Lara laughed. "All right."
"Hand Francesca my glass." I watched to make sure she gave Francesca the correct glass. "Try it, Francesca."
Francesca sampled my grape juice. She grinned at me and handed the glass to me. "Michaela finally won a wager. Congratulations."
Lara raised an eyebrow, so I handed her my glass. She took a sip then grinned. "Grape juice."
"May I have it back?"
Georgia reentered the room with a fresh rack of dresses. I finished my glass of juice and stood back up, replacing the ear buds, and stepped to the middle of the room. I watched while Georgia unwrapped the next garment. I stared at the dress.
It was simple, sleek, and absolutely stunning. I knew it was the dress I wanted.
Georgia saw my expression, but my back was to everyone else. I schooled my features before I turned around. They slipped the dress on me, the assistant grinning as she held the phone out of the way, then handing it back to me once the dress was in place.