She grabbed my shoulders before I could snuggle in my covers. “Kate, I’m sorry we didn’t talk much about what’s going on. Are you okay?”
I closed my eyes, thinking. Am I okay? Well, have I ever been okay?
“Yeah, I’m okay.” And it wasn’t a lie. I really was okay, but who’s okay with just being okay?
She shook my shoulders. “Kate. Just promise me you’ll—You know I’m here for you, right? You can talk to me. Anytime.”
“Thank you.” She frowned at my words, so I grabbed her hands to reassure her. “Really. Thank you. I know you’re here for me, and I appreciate it.”
“Quit being so fucking polite all the time. I love you, but you’re a hard person to be friends with, and I’m scared you’re going to start pulling away again. Just don’t do that.”
I sat stunned and blinked up at her several times. “I can’t get into this heavy of a conversation without coffee.”
“This isn’t funny. Why the hell do you always do that?” Lexi stood up from the edge of the bed, agitated.
I tried to contain my laughter and sat up, resigned that I was going to have to wake up now. “What?”
“You always laugh. At everything. Even when it’s not funny. Even when I’m trying to be serious.”
I sighed, debating how much I would reveal. “I have to laugh. Otherwise, I would cry or scream or fight. I have all these different emotions boiling inside me… so I laugh. It’s all I can do since the other options just suck. And I know that sometimes it comes out wrong and it’s inappropriate. But you know what? That just makes me laugh more. Because mostly I laugh ‘cause things are funny and people are ridiculous.”
“Are you calling me ridiculous?” She wavered between anger and laughter.
My hand covered my mouth as a snort escaped. “No. Maybe sometimes, but not now. I love you too, and I’m glad you’re sticking by me. That was the original point to this conversation, right?” I raised up on my knees on the bed with my arms outstretched in invitation for a hug.
Lexi stepped into my embrace and muttered, “You are fucking crazy.”
“In a good way?”
She stepped back shaking her head. “I’m not sure, but maybe it would help if you cussed more.”
After she left, I decided it was time for my own form of therapy. Running. I was never one to verbalize my feelings. Mainly because I barely understood them. But I knew Lexi would want to talk more at some point, and I had to come up with something. The words for feelings never seemed to be enough. Angry, happy, sad, and who feels just one at a time? With multiple emotions always swirling within me, I usually just focused on the best ones.
But when I run, my thoughts are clearer, instead of the jumbled mess I typically ignore every other moment of the day. I needed that clarity now.
The hotel gym was large, for a hotel gym, and had a dozen people using the facility. I claimed an oversized treadmill and ran. Within minutes I barely noticed my surroundings. After an hour, I stepped off the treadmill, frustrated that I was never able to reach the peace of mind I chased.
My epiphany occurred in the steam room. I don’t know if it was the fresh eucalyptus steam or the supremely soft hotel towels wrapped around me, but it suddenly struck me how different my life could be. I may be a bastard, but I’d just won the bastard lottery. My biological father’s money could be useful. I now had the luxury of going to school to pursue my interests as opposed to the certificate I currently held out of necessity. And I had sisters I was looking forward to getting to know, preferably without their friend Liam around. I inhaled the thick eucalyptus vapors and cleared my mind as I exhaled.
There were still many questions I wanted answered, but that could wait till my mother and Connor returned. Today, I felt happy. The familiar tension of anger and sadness still coursed through my body, pulling so tightly it threatened to crack my being, but I contained those dangerous emotions—as I always had.
Today, I would be happy.
I had three missed texts when I checked my phone.
One from my mother; a long message telling me about the hotel Connor’s company built, and how nice it will be to vacation there one day.
Another from Lexi.
Crazy girl you know that I love you. I love you like crazy girl.
As planned, the text brought a smile to my face. She had a talent for finding song lyrics to fit any situation.
The last text was from Sonja.
Manis and pedis today at the house. Then R&R by the pool. Text back ASAP
In short order, I got the details for the day and quickly showered to make it in time for the manicures and pedicures.
I needed a new wardrobe. I could tell the minute I saw my sisters and their outfits, but Chelsea let me know she thought so too in the way she eyed my choice of attire. I had on shorts and a tank top over my bikini and Old Navy flip flops. They were wearing colorful sundresses and heels that I’m sure never could be found in a discount bin.
Sonja didn’t give my outfit a second look and embraced me in her enthusiastic way. Even hung over, she vibrated with so much energy I expected her to break out in cartwheels or show tunes.
We received our nail treatments poolside on shaded lounge chairs and staff serving us drinks and snacks. It was surreal, but, oh-so-easy to relax and enjoy.
“When did you meet Liam?” Chelsea asked, eyeing me over her sunglasses.
“He recognized Lexi when we were at lunch and gave us passes into The Beacon on Thursday.” I kept to the safe part of the story.
Chelsea nodded. “We started there, then went somewhere more exclusive.”
I nodded as if I understood, hoping that would be the end of those questions and that she was there early enough to miss Liam and me together.
Sonja huffed. “You always go out without me. Did I miss anything good?”
“Just the usual. Taylor baiting Liam just to push him away. God, he’s such a sucker.”
“Oh, it was a usual night with them. In that case, glad I missed it.” Sonja leaned forward in her chair as much as she could with the nail technician attached to her left hand. “I have no clue why he puts up with her. Why any guy would put up with her. She treats them all like that. It’s crappy, but they always stick around till she finally decides it’s over. If it didn’t repulse me, I’d be jealous, ya know?”
I nodded tight lipped.
Sonja continued, “Any who, enough about other people. Kate, I’m sure you’re interested in us, right? Well, we moved into this house two years ago when our parents split.” She nodded her head, eyes bright with realization. “That’s starting to make a whole lot more sense since we learned about you. I don’t know why mother stuck around for so long. I was pissed at her for leaving Father, but now—”
“Sonja,” Chelsea reprimanded, flicking her eyes to the nail technicians. “Maybe we should save that conversation for later.”
Sonja waved her hand unconcerned. “Oh all right. Well, I go to USC for broadcasting. I want to be one of those fun broadcasters on E or something. Not the depressing stuff, I can’t imagine why anyone would want to do that. God, I think I would cry daily if I had to report bad news.”
I laughed, which earned me several confused blinks before she continued, “I’m so glad to be on break from school though. I have plans to go to Italy next month…”
Sonja told me all about her summer plans and her fall courses. Chelsea looked like she’d fallen asleep behind her sunglasses. I couldn’t tell if Chelsea was quiet like me or if Sonja just didn’t let other people talk.
I was curious about Chelsea though, and as we moved to chaise lounges in the sun after our manicures, I asked, “Do you have plans this summer, Chelsea?”
She slipped off her sundress, revealing a tiny bikini and her abundant bosom, something we did not have in common. Adjusting her chair back to a comfortable angle, she responded, “I’m working as a fashion consultant for a movie being filmed.”
Sonja shook my knee an
d added, “Father’s making her work. Poor Chelsea won’t get to travel with me this summer.”
Chelsea pursed her lips. “Father’s going to make you work one day too.”
“Are you going to school for fashion?” I asked to change the subject.
“I’m thinking about it. I keep changing my major. Which is why Father’s making me work. He says I need experience to base my decision on,” she explained as if it left a bad taste in her mouth.
“Are you enrolling at USC?” Sonja asked me.
Ah, the conversation had gotten to me. “Maybe, I’m not really sure what to do. I just earned a certificate to be a physical therapist assistant. I’d planned on working and eventually continuing my education in that field. But now, I suddenly have options, and I’m not sure what to do.”
“You were poor, weren’t you?” She asked it without contempt, just curiosity.
I was amused by her bluntness. “Yup, especially compared to your standards.”
She shook her head and balled her hands into tiny fists. “I don’t know how Father could let that happen, it makes me so mad. I wouldn’t blame you if you hated us for what we have. We should confront him and demand answers when they return.”
It hadn’t even crossed my mind to be mad at either of them. They couldn’t help that they were born into the family he chose any more than I had control over the family I was born into. I didn’t want to tarnish the day with talk about things we could do nothing about at the moment.
“I agree, but we can worry about that another day. Let’s just relax today.”
Sonja’s smile filled her face as she patted my shoulder and leaned back in her lounge chair. “I knew we’d get along. I think I love you already, sis.”
My phone beeped from my bag beside the lounge chair. I pulled it out to a text from my mother. She gave me the details of our new apartment and told me movers would be coming to the hotel tonight to pick up our boxes. I had to check out tomorrow morning. I needed to check that everything was out of the hotel and then be at our new apartment to direct the movers. She also notified me that Connor had deposited more money into my account so I could purchase bedroom furniture. I was given strict orders not to buy any other furniture since she wanted to do the decorating of the apartment.
Crap. I wish she would stop springing stuff on me. She could have let me known the timeline sooner.
I told Chelsea and Sonja what my mother had texted and apologized for having to go so soon. They both hugged me goodbye, and Sonja promised to call in the morning so we could go on that hike. My stomach squeezed in nervous anticipation of seeing Liam, or maybe it was dread.
~Carly~
Connor opened the door to Carly’s suite and stepped back, holding it open for her.
She hesitated, not wanting to say good night yet but not sure how to make him stay.
Since his shortness on the plane, she’d stayed quiet and simply been there to take notes, make arrangements, and keep him on schedule. The job was fairly easy but kept her busy.
The day had gone well; she had everything arranged behind the scenes and transitioned him smoothly from one meeting to the next. It ended with a business dinner overlooking the beach. She didn’t sit at the table but stayed close by in case he needed something. To her surprise, and pleasure, he’d invited her to join them for dessert. The business discussions had gone well, and the table was celebrating a new partnership. Carly had enjoyed the small victory of being included.
She decided against making an overt move and simply stepped through the open door. She continued walking into the room, leaving him with the choice to follow or not. After a moment, the door closed, and she heard his soft footsteps on the carpet behind her.
She smiled to herself and resisted turning around. His hands cupped her shoulders and then slid down her arms, his lips trailing kisses down her neck. He coaxed her around and their lips met, softly at first, but their kiss quickly escalated.
Carly ran through different options in her head and weighed each one. She decided to allow this to happen. Today she showed she was useful to him professionally; now she would remind him that she was also useful personally.
Chapter Six
There are some things that money just can’t buy. Like manners, morals and integrity
It’s amazing how fast things are accomplished when you have money and how little effort is needed.
I’d bought a bedroom set, curtains, TV, couch, and coffee table for my bedroom. And shower curtains and mats for my bathroom. Everything was already set up and arranged in the room. The rest of the apartment was bare, besides my mother’s boxes that were stored in her walk in closet, awaiting her return.
I paced my new apartment, debating if I would stay. I was fairly certain I could ask Connor for my own place, separate from my mother, but then I may not get a chance to question her. I wasn’t comfortable with the idea of interrogating Connor before I tried to get answers from my own mother.
Plus, I didn’t really want more from Connor. I had already enjoyed a good night’s sleep in my new bed and sheets, in a new apartment that was larger than five of our old apartments combined, all courtesy of Connor. And I was about to go to Starbucks and buy coffee on his dime.
On my walk to Starbucks, I arranged my to-do list for the day. I preferred to look at what tasks needed to be done instead of analyzing my feelings. First Coffee, then a run, then shower, then hike with my sister and her friends—that particular task gave me anxiety—then I would start applying to jobs and look into schools. I’d take Connors money for school, but I still needed to work, for me.
After I ordered an iced coffee and a blueberry scone, which I inhaled within the first block, I waited for the elevator, absently stirring my iced coffee as I considered possible businesses to apply to.
“Are you looking for me?” Liam asked, beside me.
“Huh?” I summoned my thoughts to the present moment, trying to make sense of his sudden appearance. His dark jeans and white shirt contrasted nicely with his tan skin. So did the sexy stubble on his chin, but the smell of stale alcohol seeped from his pores.
He scratched his curly hair forward and gave me a sideways grin. “I live here, what are you doing here? Are you looking for me? We’re hiking today, right?”
Inwardly, I cringed at my absentmindedness. I thought this place looked familiar; I’d been here during my drunken night out.
Outwardly, I laughed once. “I live here, too.”
I really had the worst luck ever.
The elevator doors opened, and I debated running for the steps instead of stepping into the car with him alone. I didn’t run, only because that would have made it even more awkward when I saw him again.
As the doors slid close, he pressed a button for the sixth floor, and then his fingers hovered over the numbers waiting for me.
“Third floor, please,” I said.
He leaned back on the rail in the elevator and smirked. “Was I so impressive that you had to move into the same building as me?”
I stammered, “No, I swear. I didn’t—I was too drunk to even remember where…” I pressed my lips closed, willing myself to stop talking. I stared at my drink with a sudden urge to vomit.
He seemed to take pity on me and reached out to lift my chin as the doors slid open on my floor. “Hey, don’t worry. None of them know, and I won’t tell.” He flashed a cocky grin and added, “Unless you want me to. Most girls would want to brag.”
I stepped out of the elevator with a muttered, “Thanks.”
He reached his arm out to stop the doors from closing, “I’ll see you later? Meet you in the lobby at two. I’ll drive.” He released the doors, and they glided together.
I tried to focus on my next task. I needed a run and a cold shower more than ever.
I blocked out thoughts of Liam and where he was coming from. He’d just spent the night out somewhere, possibly with Taylor. I didn’t like the way that thought made me feel. Who was I to be jealous?
I also didn’t like the effort I put into getting ready for my run. I usually ran with no makeup and hair pulled back, but today, I took time to apply a concealer and styled my hair in a braid.
After I braved running in the city instead of the gym in the building, I showered and then called Sonja to confirm that they were still going on the hike. She assured me that she and Sydney would meet us at the start of the trail.
I changed into a pair of capri leggings, a white tank top, and Nikes. I put my hair back into a sleek braid and added some light makeup, trying to stay natural looking.
When I exited the elevator, Liam was laughing with the concierge on duty. When he saw me, he knocked on the marble table as he said goodbye and then walked towards me, clean shaven and sporty looking in his mesh shorts and gray tank.
“Ready?” he questioned as he slid sunglasses on and walked out the doors held open by the doorman.
I reluctantly followed him to his gray Corvette. I buckled myself in as he revved the engine.
Liam broke the silence at the first traffic light. “So, you’re a liar. Is there anything else I should know about you?” he asked conversationally.
I choked on my words and he laughed. “It’s fine, really. You interest me. I want to know more.”
I exhaled sharply and ran my hands through my hair in a nervous habit; I cursed myself when the move knocked a few strands loose from my braid. “Well, I lied about only being in town for the weekend, obviously. That day we met was my first day in LA. I moved from the east coast.” I shrugged, not knowing what else to say. I stared out the window at the passing buildings and palm trees, not wanting to keep talking about that night. I wish we would both forget it.
“East Coast? Are you being intentionally vague?” Liam pulled into a shopping center and searched the rows for a parking space.
It Goes On Page 5