by Tina Beckett
“I’m sure it’s special.”
“Yes. It is. And we’re so grateful—to both of you—that Naomi is healthy again.”
“I’m glad as well. Any other problems? The headaches are gone?”
Naomi nodded. “Completely. I don’t know how to thank you.”
“Thank Carly. She’s the one who asked me to take a look. She could have just told you to take a couple of ibuprofen.”
“Naomi might not be around if that had happened. Neither would Charlotta.”
Adem smiled. “Is that her name? It’s beautiful. Can I see her?”
The baby’s face was hidden in a layer of blankets. Naomi carefully peeled them back and revealed a cute week-old baby with a full head of dark hair. She was wide awake, her curious gaze trying to focus on her surroundings.
The couple’s other daughter, who clutched her dad’s neck, said, “Lotta likes me.”
“Yes, she does,” Douglas said. “Your baby sister loves you.”
“I love her too.”
A pang hit Adem as he glanced at Carly. Would she try to have more kids after this one was born? If so, who would she have them with? God help him, he couldn’t even picture her with anyone else.
Except him.
That wasn’t going to happen.
“I was just going to take them back to an exam room so I could see how Naomi’s doing.” Carly’s tone was a little more brusque than he expected. But then again, they hadn’t really talked about what had happened since that day in the park. Oh, they’d exchanged pleasantries, but just in passing. They were eventually going to have to sit down and hammer out some real details and decide what the other’s expectations were.
Expectations? Did he even have any?
Damn. He was starting to think he did, and that wasn’t good. Maybe that was part of the reason he’d buried himself in work over the last several days.
Double damn.
Yes, they needed to figure this out. Now was obviously not the time. But when?
“I’d like to do a follow-up MRI as well, to make sure that aneurysm is completely sealed off. I’ll put in an order for it, if that’s all right with you.”
“I’m breastfeeding—will it affect that?”
“No. I’ll double-check with the pediatrician at the hospital, but I’ve had a couple of other patients who’ve needed contrast dye. At the time, the recommendation was that it didn’t require an interruption in breastfeeding.”
Douglas spoke up. “Then we want it done.”
His wife laughed. “Thanks for giving me some input.” She glanced at Adem. “Yes, of course. You have no idea how much better I feel after having the procedure. Have you done a lot of them?”
“Quite a few. And yours went very well.” He smiled. “I’ll let you get back to your appointment. Carly, could I speak to you for just a minute?”
“Of course. Let me just get them in a room.” She’d hesitated long enough before answering to let him know she really didn’t want to talk to him. Or maybe she just thought it was inappropriate for him to approach her about it at the clinic. Well, he wasn’t going to discuss the pregnancy itself right now; he just wanted to set up a time when they actually could talk about it.
She’d acted like she didn’t care who knew, that she wasn’t going to lie about who the baby’s father was. Maybe she’d changed her mind about that.
After she’d closed the door, she nodded toward an area off to the right, where there was an empty office. Since it was later in the day, no one was in any of the chairs. She sat in one, and he sat across from her. “Okay, I’m listening.”
“Now that we’ve both had some time to think, I’d like to discuss things again. Everything is still the same?”
So much for merely suggesting a time and a place.
“Yes. I’m still pregnant, if that’s what you’re asking. But...” She paused again. “I really don’t want this to affect you, Adem. I didn’t give you much of a choice, and even if you’d wanted me to terminate, I would have refused. So...now I’m giving you an out.”
He blinked. Then frowned. “I think I made it pretty clear that I didn’t want an out. That I was ready to accept the consequences—whatever they are.”
“Consequences. That makes it sound like a punishment of some sort.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I can see how it might seem that way, though. At least to you. So let’s just keep things quiet. I’m not going to advertise that I’m pregnant until it becomes pretty obvious. And if someone asks me who the father is, I’ll just say he’s out of the picture.”
Oh, hell, no. Whatever else Adem might have thought, he had no intention of just fading away. Especially not after seeing the joy Charlotta had brought to Douglas’s face.
He swallowed, picturing her with an abdomen swollen with child. His child.
“And when she runs to me and grabs my legs at the clinic? Will you say the father’s out of the picture then?” He leaned in closer. “Because I’m telling you right now, I plan on being very much in the picture.”
“Did you say ‘she’?”
“He or she. These are all things I’d like to talk about, before people start asking questions.”
She nodded. “I agree. It’s just hard to know what to do right now. I’ll deny you’re the father until my dying breath if you say you’re going to step down as the director. Victoria Clinic needs you.”
“It needs you too, Carly. But no one person is irreplaceable.”
“Tell that to your child after it’s born.”
“Touché. Okay, tell me where you want to meet, and we’ll figure this out.”
“I don’t have a clue, but definitely not here at the clinic. Or at the hospital.”
He thought of something. “Listen, my parents have a boat at a marina on the Thames. We could get away, where there’s no chance of anyone overhearing us.” He paused. “You said you were queasy the last time we spoke. Maybe that would be a problem.”
“Actually, I love being out on the water. When I was younger in the States, we used to do these white-water rafting tours.”
“I don’t think we’ll encounter anything like that on the Thames, since there are speed restrictions everywhere. We likely won’t get very far. But the boat has a cover, and we could take a lunch with us. Not to pressure you or anything. I just want to work through things while...you...are still in the early stages.”
“Okay.” She smiled. “That sounds fun. As long as your parents don’t mind.”
“It’s a family boat. My brother and I have both used it before, but I don’t see Basir and Adeline wanting to go out with everything else that’s going on. But if there’s a problem, I’ll let you know, okay?”
She stood. “Okay. Let me at least bring the food, since you’re providing the boat.”
“How about I give you a call in a few days and we can nail that down along with a date.” He stood as well.
“Sounds good.” Her hand brushed his in a light touch. “And for what it’s worth, I don’t regret everything that happened.”
His lips curved as she walked away from him and said in a voice too low for her to hear, “Neither do I, Carly. Neither do I.”
And he realized for the first time since she’d told him the news, he really meant it.
* * *
Carly had opted to meet him at the marina, three days later, rather than have him stop by her place to pick her up and she wasn’t sure why. Was she afraid to have him over?
Um, that would be a resounding yes. Despite her insistence that what had happened between them was over, there’d been a subtle buzz of anticipation ever since he’d mentioned going out on the boat. If she’d thought Adeline’s pregnancy was going to connect her and Adem’s lives on a temporary basis, what was having a baby of their own going to mean?
And what about the way she’d reached for his hand and told him she didn’t regret what had happened?
Was that true?
Lord help her, yes, it was. As hard as she tried to fight off her feelings for him, they were relentlessly growing. And she wasn’t sure how to stop them.
It had to be the baby. Or hormones. Or something other than the fact that the man was eating away at her defenses without even trying.
She still wanted him physically as well, which made it even worse. But Carly did not see herself as a “friends with benefits” kind of person. Were they friends?
She thought they might be heading in that direction...before the pregnancy had happened. And now? She didn’t know. What she felt for Adem seemed to blur the boundaries she’d drawn for herself. Well, there was one way to sharpen those lines again.
She could assert her independence and make sure he knew that, ultimately, she called the shots with this baby.
And when she runs to me and grabs my legs?
As soon as he’d said those words, she’d pictured a little girl with dark pigtails and Adem’s smile running toward him, arms opened wide. It was an image she hadn’t been able to banish.
It had replayed in her head time and time again, becoming clearer and clearer.
Which made it all the more important to put a cleaver between “want” and what was best. For her. For their child.
And yet here she was, picnic hamper in hand, getting ready to go out on a boat with him. And that anticipation was still there, rumbling in the background, growing stronger by the minute.
It’s not a lover’s gondola, Carly.
Really? Meat, cheese, grapes—the things she’d brought for their meal? Weren’t those the things that were normally eaten in intimate settings?
Not in this case.
Adem appeared on the dock, dark hair ruffling in the breeze, wearing dark brown shorts, those tanned legs sporting the kind of lean muscle that made her mouth water. Her anticipation revved up a couple of notches, becoming the roar of outboard engines.
Independence, Carly, remember?
She suddenly felt self-conscious in a pink sundress that exposed pale calves and white feet. Thinking about it, her leather thong sandals were probably not the best choice of footwear for a boat either. But it was too late now, and like he’d said, they weren’t likely to go far with the speed restrictions.
He came up beside her and took the basket. “I’m glad you came.”
“I told you I would.”
“Yes, you did. I wondered if you actually would, though.”
She forced a smile. “You’ll find I keep my word.”
“So do I.”
A reference to when he told her to make no mistake, that he would be a part of his baby’s life?
This conversation could get very sticky very quickly. She decided to change the subject to something a little more neutral. “Where’s the boat?”
“Halfway down the dock on the right. The Ankara.”
“Named after the city?”
“It’s where my parents were born.” He walked beside her as they made their way across the plank walkway where boats bobbed on either side of them. “Where they were married.”
“How long have you lived here in the UK?”
“I was fifteen when my dad moved us here.”
She didn’t know that. But it made sense. “Wow, his restaurant must be fairly successful, since he owns a boat like this.”
“Yes. He works very hard. In that he’s successful.”
But not in other things? He’d said his family was a mess.
Was that why he wanted to be a part of his child’s life? To fulfill something that he thought was lacking in his own upbringing? She had no idea, and right now she was afraid to ask. She wanted him to love his child for who he or she was, not because it was a means to an end.
The bubble of anticipation deflated just a bit.
He’d mentioned before that he wasn’t sure how he was going to tell his parents, which further supported the idea that things were strained in the family.
The Ankara was where he said it would be. All white with sharp black lettering, the boat was immaculate. It wasn’t a yacht, but it was bigger than what she’d pictured in her head. With a white canvas cover that stretched from the steering wheel to about halfway back, there were four seats in the shade and four behind that, where passengers could catch some sun.
Adem stepped across onto the boat, set the hamper on one of the seats and then held his hand out to her. She hesitated before gripping his fingers and letting him help her aboard. As the touch continued to linger, she was hyperaware of every inch of his skin against hers.
Lord, hadn’t she read that pregnancy could make her crave things? Like what they’d done in his flat? But that wasn’t supposed to happen until the second trimester. And in actuality, that craving had been there long before she’d ever become pregnant. If she’d hoped it would magically disappear, she was clearly mistaken.
It was very much alive and well.
She hopped on the boat and let go of him in a hurry, afraid he might somehow guess her thoughts.
“I like your dress.”
His smile made her heart trip a time or two. So much for trying to change her train of thought. That evidently wasn’t going to happen.
“Thanks. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in shorts.”
His smile turned crooked. “I won’t remind you of what you have and haven’t seen me in.”
God, there was that. She’d seen him in a whole lot of nothing. But reminding her of that fact wasn’t going to help either of them. Especially since she was now picturing him without those shorts.
She decided to let that comment pass without a reply.
Picking up the basket, he made his way to the covered area where the steering wheel and controls were, not that she was familiar with nautical terms. “It’s turned out to be a really nice day.”
“It has. We can unzip the front portion of the cover to let the air blow through, once we stop, otherwise it’ll get pretty warm under here.”
“I can imagine.” She was getting warmer by the minute, in fact.
“Ready to go play?” he asked.
She blinked, suddenly picturing that window in his apartment. God, Carly, he’s talking about getting under way, not playing around on the boat. What is wrong with you?
“I’m ready to head out whenever you are.”
With that, Adem undid the mooring lines that kept the boat tied to the dock, then started the engines. Minutes later, they were out of the marina and moving onto the Thames itself.
There were stairs leading to an area somewhere below deck. Probably sleeping quarters and maybe a galley kitchen. People routinely slept on their boats in the States, where boating was a big business, but she wasn’t sure if things were the same here.
She wasn’t going to ask for a tour, though, that was for sure. Because seeing a bed would send her thoughts floating back to another kind of tour. And that was one word she avoided like the plague nowadays.
Instead, she settled in and tried to enjoy the sights on the waterway amid the throb of the engines and the traffic of other boaters. She wasn’t sure of their destination, and right now she didn’t care.
Adem glanced over. “How are you feeling? I know you said you weren’t sick, but I didn’t think to ask about seasickness.”
“So far, so good.” The conditions seemed pretty smooth. If anything, it was exhilarating to be away from the hospital. He’d been right about that. She needed to cut loose and have fun sometimes. She hadn’t realized it until she’d spent that night with him. It was one of the few times her mind hadn’t been crammed full of thoughts of patients. Maybe that was part and parcel of being a midwife, since one of her patients could go into labor at a
ny minute. Even while she was here on a boat. She glanced down at the screen of her phone, half expecting to see that that had indeed happened, but so far there was nothing there, other than a text from her mom asking if she was free for lunch on Friday. She picked it up and started to reply.
“No work allowed.”
Carly crinkled her nose. “I can’t exactly schedule when my patients go into labor, you know. And right now my life is free enough that I can easily get away.”
“Not right this second, unless you jump overboard.”
She laughed. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” She enjoyed this light and easy chatting, felt like she hadn’t done this with him in ages, if ever.
“I do. But I also know that soon your life is about to get a lot more complicated.”
What? Oh, he meant with her pregnancy. So much for light and easy. But he was right. Things were going to change drastically. Something she didn’t want to think about right now. She decided to change the subject. “Where are we going, anyway?”
“There’s a little marina I have in mind. It’ll take us about an hour to arrive.” He nodded toward shore. “Look, the Eye.”
She hadn’t realized they would pass the London Eye, and it looked bigger somehow from the water. Strangely, she had never been on the iconic Ferris wheel. Maybe because she wasn’t really a fan of heights. And then she found herself searching for his apartment building.
Her fear of heights certainly hadn’t bothered her that time. Maybe because her mind had been a lot more wrapped up in what he was doing to her.
In more ways than one.
She glanced to her belly, her mouth twisting in a sardonic smile.
What were they going to do?
She had no idea. She was still dwelling on those thoughts when Adem throttled down the engines, pulling into a section of the river where there were all types of boats moored, from large sailboats to vessels much smaller than Adem’s family’s boat.
Wow, an hour had gone by already. Despite the slow speed, she’d enjoyed puttering down the river.
She got up and, under his direction, helped him secure the boat in one of the berths, tossing some kind of padded bolster things over the side. “What are these called?”