by Tina Beckett
Dammit. She didn’t need it. Didn’t need him. No matter what her heart might say.
Carly checked Gloria’s cervix. Eight centimeters already. And the woman was still optimistic. Which wasn’t the norm with a lot of mothers. At some point they usually started turning in on themselves, too caught up in what was going on inside their bodies. But then Gloria and Ned had partnered together for two other children. They had this down to an art.
“I’m just going to get set up. Is there anything you need right now?”
“No. Just some ice cubes. But Ned has those for me.”
Right on cue, he scooped up the glass and helped her pick a few out, while Carly got her instruments set up on clean towels on the bedside table.
Maybe she was going to have to swap things out and let her mom be her birthing partner, while Adem simply observed. She wasn’t sure she was ready for that level of intimacy with him.
But she’d had such hope.
Was she pinning her hopes on him in other areas as well? Like being there when their child took his or her first steps? Or birthday celebrations? Special milestones?
You’re not being fair, Carly. He’s still getting used to things.
Just like she was. Maybe instead of just tossing him to the side, she should watch for patterns. If they repeated over and over, then she was going to have some hard choices to make. But now wasn’t the time. No one thought clearly at three in the morning.
But she’d better figure out how to put her mind back on her job. For Gloria, Ned and this baby, who was about to make an appearance.
At nine centimeters and fully effaced, excitement crackled as they prepared to bring a new life into the world. Gloria was most comfortable on her side, so Carly let her guide her own delivery. As a midwife, she was there to assist and keep the mom and baby as safe as possible. And if something went sideways, she would take things to the next level. But she didn’t expect that to happen in this case.
Ten centimeters. “Okay, Gloria, when you feel the urge to push, you can go ahead.”
Ned had opted to stay up by his wife’s head to support her and keep her morale high during the process. They made a good team. A team that obviously worked together in a lot of areas of their lives, not just this delivery.
Another thing she wouldn’t have in common with Adem.
You work at the hospital with him. That should count for something.
Yes. And she’d worked together with him on Naomi’s case.
But was that the same thing? No. But it was either take what they had right now, or nothing at all. There were no other options, so she should stop beating herself and Adem up over something that couldn’t be helped.
“I need to push.” Gloria’s voice broke through her thoughts, and she stopped to put her mind on what was in front of her. Guiding her through fifteen minutes of strong contractions and pushing, the head appeared. Then a shoulder.
Carly eased the presenting shoulder out and then the other. As soon as that happened, the baby slipped out on the next push. She carried the newborn in its towel up to Gloria and Ned. “You have a little girl.”
Adem had mentioned having a girl. And they’d talked about the name Derya Ann, which she’d loved as it incorporated both their cultures.
Placing the baby on Gloria’s chest, skin to skin, she watched the cord as it continued to pulse.
Ned leaned down to kiss his wife’s head. “She’s absolutely beautiful. Just like you.”
With her free hand, Gloria reached up to pull him back down to her. “She’s both of us. We made this beautiful treasure.”
Carly’s fingers touched her own belly. What Gloria said was true. This couple’s new baby wasn’t one person or the other. She was both of them. A melding of two identities and genes, and in their case...love.
There was a saying that two out of three wasn’t bad. And together she and Adem had made the tiny form that was now nestled safely inside of her.
Their baby.
Why did she keep second-guessing everything? Because she and Adem were nothing like Gloria and Ned. Nothing about the situation made her feel secure, and it bothered her that she even needed that. She was a grown woman who had loved and lost and very nearly lov—
Stop. Just stop.
“Ned, the cord has stopped pulsing—do you want to cut it?”
“Yes, please.”
Handing him the surgical scissors, she clamped close to the baby’s belly and showed him where to cut. It was sliced through in a second and looked perfect. Just like the newborn.
A half hour later the baby was snug and safe, and Carly had completed the documents that recorded the birth and cleaned up her instruments.
“I’m going to go so you can get acquainted with your little one.” The couple’s other two children had slept through the birth, so they wouldn’t meet their new sister until tomorrow.
Gloria reached for her, gripping her hand. “Thank you so much for coming. We couldn’t have done it without you.”
“I loved being here. I’m glad everything went so well.” She smiled at the baby, who was already nursing. “I’ll see myself out. Call me if you have any questions or concerns.”
“We will. Thank you again.”
Carly left the house and climbed into her car. Now that the rush of adrenaline had worn off, she was flat tired. Exhausted, in fact.
She drove to the first traffic light, only to have it turn red just before she arrived. All she wanted was to get home and climb in bed. She was due at the clinic in three short hours. If it weren’t for Adem, she would have called to see if someone could cover for her for a couple of hours, but the sonogram machines were due to arrive this morning, and she really didn’t want him to know she’d been out this late at night. Although that was ridiculous. He was just as apt to get a middle-of-the-night call from the hospital asking him to come look at a head trauma.
Resting her hands on the top of the steering wheel, she waited for the light. When it turned green she started through the intersection. From the corner of her eye she saw a movement and slammed on her brakes, but not soon enough to avoid the vehicle that hit full force against the side of her car. She felt herself spinning, head whipping around to the side, her foot still pressed hard against the brake. Her hand went to her stomach as she finally came to a jerking stop. She sat there for what seemed like an eternity, feeling a warm trickle down the side of her right temple.
She reached over to unbuckle the seat belt and then realized with horror that she hadn’t pushed the bottom section down her hips as far as she should have, and that in keeping her from crashing through her windshield, her body had lunged against the belt with terrific force.
A sense of nausea built in her chest, and she leaned sideways, vomiting onto the seat. The street was eerily silent and there was no sound from anyone in the other car. Were they hurt? Wiping the back of her hand across her mouth, she reached over to try to find her cell phone, thankfully locating it immediately.
Oh, God, her baby. How hard had she hit that seat belt? Hard enough that her chest hurt from the impact.
She glanced at the screen and saw her last call was from Adem, telling her about the sonogram machines arriving tomorrow. Without thinking, she pushed the button and listened to two rings before her muddled head realized she should be calling emergency services, not Adem. She hung up and dialed the number that everyone knew by heart. In a shaky voice she told them her location and that there was another vehicle, but it was somewhere behind her and she couldn’t see...
“Stay in your vehicle. Help is en route.”
She lifted her hand to her head to find the source of the bleeding. Something on her temple stung. Maybe she’d hit her head.
The phone buzzed again, and thinking it was the dispatcher calling back she answered, only to hear a sleepy masculine voice. “Carly? Did you try
to call me?”
“I... I...” Hearing his voice suddenly made a wall of emotion erupt, and she gave a half-sob.
“Where are you?” His voice sharpened as if he’d suddenly come fully awake.
“At an intersection.” She tried to find a sign, but her eyes hurt. “I don’t know which one. I had a delivery tonight. A baby girl, like ours.” No, wait. She didn’t know if it was a girl.
A sense of sleep was starting to take over again, only this didn’t quite feel like the normal tiredness she’d had earlier.
“Carly!” His voice made her blink.
“...was an accident. I think...an ambulance.”
“Where was your patient? Give me the address.”
“Mmm...just want to sleep.”
“No! Tell me where you are.”
She tried to open her mouth to tell him, but nothing came out. Then doing what she’d longed to do ever since she left Gloria and Ned’s house, she laid her head back against the seat, closing her eyes. She still heard Adem’s voice off in the distance, but it was growing fainter and fainter as her hand dropped to the seat beside her.
With a sigh, her pain melted away along with her fear and she gave in to the wave that was closing over her head.
Derya Ann. Sleep well, baby.
CHAPTER EIGHT
ADEM SKIDDED INTO the Queen Victoria and practically sprinted past the admissions desk in the A&E, ignoring the shocked eyes of the staff members, some of whom knew him. All he knew was that Carly had been in a car accident, the other driver getting off with barely a scratch, although he was flaming drunk. The man had run a traffic light.
Dammit.
Of course Adem wasn’t on Carly’s list of emergency contacts, so he was going in there as a doctor and not as the father of her child. He was told she’d hit her head, bringing back eerie memories of the child he’d fought so hard to save but had ultimately lost.
At four in the morning, the hospital was quieter than during normal operating hours, so at the first shut exam room door, he knocked and then peeked in. There she was. Dane Hampton, one of the other neurosurgeons, was with her.
“How is she?”
The man’s head tilted when he saw him. “Adem? I didn’t know you were on duty tonight.”
And here came the explanations, none of which he had. “It’s complicated. She works at the clinic. How is she?”
“I think she may have a slight concussion. We were about to take her to X-ray and make sure nothing else is broken.”
“She’s pregnant.” The words came out before he could stop them. But since Carly hadn’t shared the news with anyone other than her mother, he wanted to make sure they knew that before doing radiographs.
Dane glanced at a computer screen. “I see no record of that. Are you sure?”
“Yes. Like I said, she works at the clinic.” He swallowed hard. “She told me.”
“Confirmed? Or suspected?”
Actually, Adem didn’t know if she’d had another pregnancy test done, or if she’d stopped at the one. “She’s pretty sure.”
“Okay. How far along, do you know?”
“Not far.” Let’s see, today would make almost four weeks.
Dane made a sound in his throat. “She’s got bruising from the seat belt on her chest and across her abdomen.”
Her abdomen?
He swore. Was the baby okay? Hell, none of that mattered right now. All he was concerned about was Carly.
“Has she regained consciousness?”
“Not yet. I pulled her records. She was out on a call, had just left the location.”
At four in the morning? No, the call would have come earlier. But she had to be exhausted.
“Any sign of anything else going on?”
“Her pupils are normal and reactive. Blood pressure and temp are normal. As far as I can tell, she just conked her head.”
Almost as soon as he said it, Carly’s eyes fluttered and then opened, trailing around the room. He went up to the bed and looked down at her, ignoring the need to take her hand. “Hey. How are you feeling?”
“The baby?”
“I’m sure the baby is fine.” The last thing he wanted to do was scare her.
“Hmm...” Her eyes closed for a second before reopening. “We still haven’t thought of a boy’s name yet.”
Dane’s glance sharpened, coming to rest on him. He nodded toward the back of the room. When Adem followed him, he said, “Is there something I should know?”
It wasn’t up to him to tell the other doctor anything. That was Carly’s decision.
“Like I said, it’s complicated. I just want to make sure she’s okay.” He would figure out all of the other stuff later. No need to tell the other man that they’d slept together but were not in a relationship, even though he knew Dane wasn’t a gossip.
“That’s what I’m trying to do. But if you have any personal involvement with this...patient...then you need to take a step back and let me handle this.”
Dane was right. He knew he was. But man, turning Carly over to him was not an easy pill to swallow. “I know.”
“Let me finish examining her, and then I’ll come out and let you know. But thanks for telling me about the pregnancy. I’ve called her mother. She’s on her way in.”
Great. So much for setting up a time to meet her. It looked like fate had taken that out of both of their hands.
“Thanks.” He hesitated. “If you could keep this between us for now, I would appreciate it.”
“As long as Carly doesn’t tell me something untoward happened between you, then what happens between staff members is their business, not mine. I met my wife at this hospital.” He said it with a smile.
Little did the man know that he and Carly weren’t getting married. Or engaged. Nor anything that remotely looked like the joining of two lives.
Hadn’t that already happened, though?
“I’ll be in my office.”
“Okay, I’ll see about having her ultrasounded. If she’s three or four weeks out, we should be able to see the gestational sac at least. But we probably won’t know the effect on the pregnancy for at least a couple of days. If she miscarries, it’ll be somewhere in that time frame.”
Trudging to his office was hard. But he couldn’t demand to be there with her. He’d already closed the door on anything that smacked of commitment.
How about saying he wanted to be a part of the baby’s life? Didn’t that constitute commitment?
Not in the eyes of the hospital or the law. Carly was the only one who could give permission for him to know anything.
And that sucked. Big-time.
Once she was well enough, he was going to ask to be included on her emergency contact list. If she hadn’t called him, he wouldn’t have even known she was in an accident until after he arrived at work and realized she was missing. He didn’t like that.
What if she’d been killed?
Or her brain had started swelling?
He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers to stop the tension headache that was gathering.
And if she didn’t want him on that list? He really had no right to demand to be notified, even though the baby was his.
It wasn’t just the baby. He genuinely cared what happened to her.
Dammit. If he wanted to meet her mother, maybe he should go to the waiting room instead of hiding out in his office. With that thought in mind, he started to get up from his chair, only to have his mobile ring.
Thank God.
He answered. “Carly. Are you okay? The baby?”
A female voice who was definitely not Carly answered. “This is Madelaine Eliston, Carly’s mom. She asked me to call you. Are you...?”
The voice trailed away. “Her baby’s father? Yes.”
“I see. She talked about wanting to introduce us. Can we meet?”
This wasn’t exactly how he’d imagined this going down. Hell, he’d tried not to imagine it at all, but here it was. It made him realize that he probably wasn’t going to be able to keep this from his parents for long, and that the idea of trying wasn’t a good thing. Carly was handling all of this much better than he was.
“Is she still being examined?”
“Yes, they’re doing an ultrasound right now. I’m in the waiting room. Do you want to come here?”
He certainly didn’t want her coming to his office. Not after what had happened in here. “Yes, I’ll be right down.”
Heading down the lift back to the ground floor, he made his way to the spot where Carly’s mom was waiting for him. He definitely wasn’t skidding down any halls like he had half an hour earlier. Really, all he wanted to do right now was find out how Carly was. Whether the ultrasound showed anything they could make any sense out of.
He recognized her right away. With red hair and a calm demeanor, she looked very much like her daughter. “Mrs. Eliston?”
“You’re Mr. Kepler?”
“Yes, but call me Adem, please.”
“I want you to know that I’m very happy for Carly. And she’s thrilled.”
“Thank you. I’m pretty happy as well.”
He was. The accident had focused his thoughts, helped him put his priorities in order.
And if it were too late?
Hell, everything had to be okay. To lose the baby now...
He decided to ask. “Have you heard anything more?”
“Carly has a wicked headache, but the other doctor told me that’s pretty normal with a concussion. I can’t believe a drunk driver hit her. When will people learn?”
“Unfortunately not soon enough.”
A doctor was headed their way, but it wasn’t Dane this time. It was the same obstetrician that had consulted with him on Naomi’s case. Raphael Dubois.