***
The shower had been lukewarm by the time I got to it, but I didn't care, it was still amazing. I scrubbed myself so ferociously that my skin was red and chapped by the time I was done. I lathered conditioner into my hair hoping it would help untangle the horrific mess it had become.
We had managed to dig up some clothes upon entering the basement apartment, but they were all men's clothes. I didn't care; I would rather have walked around nude then put my disgusting dump clothes back on again. My old clothes were sitting in a trash bag now, but I could still smell them. Either that or the stench really had permeated my skin forever. Just the thought made me scrub myself again, it was becoming painful to do so, but I didn't care.
Intending to save at least some warm water for Cade, I finally tore myself away from the delightful spray. I dressed in the loose fitting tee and oversized pants. Using a belt I cinched the waist and rolled the bottom of the jeans up. It took me awhile, and a lot of wincing and cursing, but I was finally able to untangle my hair so it fell around my shoulders and back again.
I didn't pick up the trash bag with my clothes in it, but rather opened up the door and kicked it out. Much like a soccer ball, I bounced it back and forth as I made my way down the hall. I kicked it next to the other two bags sitting by the bulkhead in the small galley kitchen. There was no stove but a hotplate sat next to the microwave. I didn't know if the home above had been the parents of the guy who had lived here, but the entrance into the house had been blocked off. The bulkhead was the only way in or out.
The basement had no windows, but we had only turned on one lamp upon entering. The lamp was in the far back, in a small living room with a battered sofa and a ratty armchair that looked entirely inviting. I slumped into the chair, pleasantly surprised by how comfortable it was considering stuffing popped out of the arms. Cade slipped down the hall and moved toward the shower.
I drew my legs up onto the seat, closed my eyes, and passed out.
I didn't know how much time had passed before I woke again. It was impossible to tell time in the windowless room. My legs were asleep, my neck ached from sleeping at such an awkward angle, but I felt better than I had earlier. "You're awake."
My hands slapped down on the arms as I bolted upright. I hadn't realized Bret was on the couch until he'd spoken. I winced as my legs protested against me straightening them and my neck screamed in twisted agony, but I was eventually able to unravel myself from my cramped position. "I didn't see you there. Where is everyone?"
"Bedroom down the hall. How are you?"
I swallowed heavily. His tone sounded dull and flat. There was something wrong, and I was afraid I already knew what it was. I'd been an idiot to fall asleep before I'd had a chance to talk to him; it seemed as if Jenna had beaten me to it. "Ok."
"From what Abby said it sounded like you guys had a rough time out there."
"It could have been worse. Far worse."
I tried to make him out on the couch, but all I could see was a deeper shadow as someone had turned off the lamp. There was definitely something off about him, but I wasn't sure if Jenna had talked to him, or if he was just as exhausted as the rest of us. I swallowed heavily. If Jenna hadn't spoken to him, then I had to now. There was no point in dragging this out, no reason to cause him more grief than I was already going to. I couldn't keep up this charade, and I had a feeling Cade wouldn't allow it to continue for much longer.
The couch groaned as he stood up and shuffled toward me. Guilt and self-hatred flooded me as he knelt before me and took hold of my hands. I was about to pull my hands away, but he leaned forward and kissed me before I could react. My head spun, I almost recoiled from him, but I couldn't bring myself to be that cruel. Bret didn't deserve that, he didn't deserve any of this. There was no spark in the kiss, no passion, but it was comforting, familiar, and sweet. I allowed him to kiss me briefly before I pulled away from him.
"I'm glad you're safe, Bethany, and here, with me."
"Bret..."
"We can get through this, together. We can get through anything together."
His hands squeezed mine more firmly as he leaned closer. I swallowed heavily, unsure how to proceed. I'd never dealt with anything like this before. "Bret, we have to talk."
"You had a rough time out there."
"We all did."
"Sometimes things happen..." My eyebrows drew together as my mouth pursed. Had Jenna talked to him, or had he picked up on a strange vibe from Cade and I? Either way, it seemed as if he was determined not to hear what I had to say, or to rationalize it away.
"Did you speak to Jenna?'
"Jenna? No, why?"
I hedged, uncertain how to proceed. He must have picked up on something between Cade and me, or perhaps Cade had said something after I'd fallen asleep. "Bret there's something we should talk about. Did Cade..."
His hands tightened on mine, he leaned closer. "We don't have to talk about him. When people are frightened, or stressed, they do things they normally wouldn't do."
"Bret..."
"It's ok Bethany; things will go back to normal now or at least as normal as they can be under the circumstances."
I didn't know what to say to him, I could barely breathe through the anguish clenching my chest. I'd known Bret most of my life, he was a good person. It was me who was awful and wrong. I clasped both of his hands in mine. I knew what had to be done, but maybe it didn't have to be done right now. It was obvious he didn't want it to be right now, obvious he clung to the hope we would be fine. I couldn’t give him much, but I could give him that at least. Couldn't I?
My eyes shot toward the doorway as movement caught my attention. I didn't know how long Cade had been standing there, but if he hadn't moved I never would have noticed him. It seemed he was a part of the shadows as he blended in with them seamlessly. I was amazed and a little unnerved by the way the shadows embraced him.
I pulled back, unable to stop myself as Bret leaned forward to kiss me again. Distress flashed through his eyes, his hands clenched upon mine as he sat back on his heels. I couldn't look at either of them as I untangled my hands from Bret's grasp and rose slowly. My back protested the movement as I stretched my cramped muscles, but it felt good to move again.
I blinked against the harsh flare of light as Cade flipped the switch. Resentment flashed across Bret's features when he spotted Cade leaning in the doorway. "What do you want?" Bret demanded.
Bret had decided to take all of his ire out on Cade, instead of me, where it belonged. Cade lifted a black eyebrow as wry amusement flitted over his handsome features. Under the amusement though was a seething mass of tension. This situation would have to be resolved, soon, or it would get ugly. It never should have gotten to this point to begin with.
And it was entirely my fault.
"You know what I want, or at least who," Cade drawled.
My mouth dropped, my hands clenched on my arms as I stared at him in utter disbelief. I couldn't believe he'd just said that. "Son of a bitch!" Bret growled.
I seized hold of Bret's arm as he took a threatening step forward. He looked about ready to beat the crap out of Cade, but Cade remained leaning nonchalantly in the doorway. He didn't appear at all fazed by Bret's irritation though Bret was a good thirty pounds heavier, and three inches taller. "I just thought all the cards should be on the table, so there is no confusion about what my intentions are." I could only stand there and continue to gape at Cade as his gaze burned over me. "I know what I want, and now you do too."
Bret was shaking in my grip, his hands fisted at his sides. I was trembling from the effects of Cade's sizzling look, and from the words he’d just uttered. "Don't do this now," I managed to whisper. Bret didn't relax in my grasp, but his gaze slowly slid toward me. The look of betrayal in his eyes made me want to cry. "Bret, I'm sorry, I really am. I didn't mean for this to happen, I never meant to hurt you, it's the last thing in the world I ever..."
I gasped as he knocked my hand aside and
jerked his arm from my grasp. Cade's casual demeanor vanished as he came away from the door. Fury darkened his features; his eyes were shards of black ice as a muscle in his cheek twitched. My heart leapt into my throat, I stood in between them and threw up my hands to halt Cade's approach.
"You want to take this out on someone then take it out on me!" Cade snarled. His rage was so volatile, so intense, it caused the hair on my neck to stand up. It didn't matter if Bret was bigger, in that moment I thought Cade might just kill him. "Not her, me."
Before I knew what Cade planned he seized hold of my hand with surprising tenderness, considering the enraged look on his face, and began to rub it. "It's fine... I'm fine," I managed to stammer out. His eyes came toward me; they crinkled at the edges as his gaze softened. My hand clenched around his, I couldn't stop the immediate physical and emotional reaction that surged through me.
"What's going on?" I had been so caught up in everything I hadn't noticed Aiden's appearance in the room. His hair was rumpled from sleep, his eyes were a little swollen, but the keen edge in his gaze was somewhat unnerving. "Are you ok?" he demanded of me as his attention honed in on Cade's hand on mine.
"I'm fine. Everything's fine," I managed to reassure him.
He glanced at Bret, then at Cade, before finally settling on me again. Cade had been his friend once, but that had been years ago. Bret was his best friend now; I knew where Aiden's loyalties would lie. I didn't want him put in the middle of this. "Better be," he said. "Abby, Molly, and Jenna are awake too."
"Good, we have to figure out what we're going to do."
"Didn't Bret tell you?"
I glanced back at Bret, but he wouldn't look at me as his gaze remained focused on the far wall. His mouth was clamped shut and his arms folded over his broad chest. I ached for the sting of rejection I sensed in him. Swallowing heavily I turned my attention back to Aiden. "No," I informed him.
"The rental store down the road does have scuba gear."
I frowned in confusion. "But you said that was a bad idea."
"It's the only one we have now. The fact we need to get to the mainland hasn't changed Bethany. We can't stay on this side. They'll find us." My hand tensed on Cade's as I sought his strength. I knew I should let go of him, knew I was only hurting Bret more, but I couldn't bring myself to release him. I was a truly awful person. Cade's hands wrapped around my arms, he pulled me a small step closer to him. His attention was still half on Bret as he listened to Aiden. "We have to do something, Bethany."
Though Aiden was trying to keep his face expressionless, confusion and astonishment blazed from the eyes rapidly flickering back and forth between the three of us. He focused on me, shook his head, opened his mouth to say something, and then clamped it shut again. He muttered something under his breath, it was so low I couldn't make it out, but Cade pulled me even closer to him.
"I know we do," I muttered.
"It's getting dark now, we should be going soon."
I couldn't wait to get out of this apartment, and to put some space between Cade and Bret. But the thought of being outside again, of being completely exposed to those creatures once more, caused a cold chill to run down my spine.
Ravenous (Book 1, The Ravening Series) Page 30