by HR Moore
‘More of the diary?’ suggested Anita, shuffling over a little to get comfortable.
Alexander nodded, absentmindedly stroking her back, ‘I’m quite keen to understand what it is exactly Helena wants us to uncover. I can’t believe we’ve got there quite yet.’
Anita pulled the notebook out of her pocket, flicked to the page where they’d left off and started reading once more.
‘9th January, 1332.
I’ve finally returned from the Wild. My parents decided it was about time we came back to civilisation, not least to sell all of the wonderful, exotic things we’ve collected along the way. Yesterday, we made our way from market stall to market stall selling the cocoa beans and spices my parents trade in. Our version of a library back home in Empire is full of jars of different herbs, spices, roots and beans, alongside books my parents have written about the properties of each. My dad has a knack for seeking out the purest supplies and my mum has a knack for selling them - together a formidable force. So yesterday, mum was in her element, reeling in the younger, greener stall holders with her ‘pushover woman’ act, the older stall holders inviting her in for tea and sweet cakes in the hope that if they treated her with respect, she would respect their profit margins in return. Mum does tend to go a bit easy on the older ones; they’re people she’s been trading with for years, often people who helped teach her everything she knows, back when she was a child whose playground was the market, her father a stall holder selling silks. In the end, somehow or other mum always gets the price she wants, my father, famously, one of the only people to have ever got the better of her in a trade (I suspect this has a great deal to do with why mum was eventually persuaded to accept his marriage proposal), and yesterday was no exception.
To celebrate a great day’s trading, we went for a lavish dinner at my dad’s club, ginger champagne all round and by the end of the evening we were all feeling quite merry, until that was, I saw him. It was odd; the blood seemed to drain from my brain, adrenaline coursed through my veins, my energy soared, and yet I couldn’t move, I was frozen to the spot. He was talking to a friend as he walked past, both clad in dinner jackets, their hair slicked back, the friend offering him a tobacco roll from a silver case. He refused. ‘Must dash,’ he said to the friend, placing a warm hand on his shoulder, ‘but I’ll be at Monty’s later. Alistair and I were thinking of playing some cards. Might see you there?’ The friend nodded, they shook hands informally and Jeff left, not looking back, so not seeing me. The friend noticed I’d been watching them as he returned to his table on the other side of the floor. He gave me a strange look but didn’t say a thing.
My parents and I returned to our guest house and I immediately headed for bed, their company now suffocating; it was a relief to close the wooden door behind me and shut out the world. I lay down on the enormous mattress, the feather duvet threatening to engulf me, and considered my options. I haven’t heard from him in four months; nothing since he abruptly left the trading post in Wild Wood. In the last month or so I’ve even started to stop missing him, almost believing it was just a fling, a fun way to pass the time when we were travelling. But seeing him in the club wrenched me back to those glorious weeks we had together and the feelings have come flooding back.
I decided I had to see him. If I waited until morning I wouldn’t know where to find him, and let’s face it, I wouldn’t have had the false courage supplied by all the champagne that was swimming around my veins. Seeing as I was already dressed for Monty’s, a sophisticated cocktail bar with a jazz band and card tables, all I had to do was slip out of the guest house and walk the two streets to the bar.
I arrived at Monty’s and they looked me up and down. I was very glad of the elegant black dress and stilettos mum bought me especially for dinner. The cinched in waist, puffed out skirt and cap sleeves at least made me look the part, even if the girl at the front desk could sense I wasn’t exactly a regular. ‘Who are you here with?’ she asked viciously, seemingly looking for a reason to turn me away, her stance that of the most popular girl at school vetting a newcomer to see if they were worthy, her drop waisted flapper dress seeming somehow to add to her passive aggression.
‘I’m here to see someone called Jeff,’ I replied, trying to be confident but non-confrontational.
‘Jeff?’ she gave me daggers as the name rolled off her tongue and she again flicked her eyes up and down me as she decided what would happen next. ‘Come with me,’ she said eventually, turning to lead the way, not waiting to see if I was following. She slinked up the long, wide, marble steps that led to an extravagant circular bar at the top, the columns either side giving the place an almost erudite feel. The place oozed a weird kind of sophisticated danger; it felt like no one here could be trusted, but everyone realised that, making it a part of the fun. I felt like I was walking into a vipers nest, the girl leading me the snake charmer, the one in control of who could bite me and when.
As we reached the top of the steps, the girl turned right, away from the packed dance floor, full of couples energetically dancing to the faultless band, and around the circular bar to a less busy area where there were card tables dotted here and there. She approached a group of men standing casually at the bar, sipping elaborate cocktails from martini glasses, Jeff standing in the middle, carelessly leaning back against the dark mahogany. He was the first to notice her, not looking to see who was trailing in her wake, and an evasive smile spread across his lips. ‘Helena,’ he said obliquely, sending her a questioning look. She said nothing in return, locking eyes with him and totally ignoring the others. She walked right up to him, kissed him flirtatiously on the lips and then moved her mouth to his ear, where she whispered something to him. His eyes snapped up as she pulled away and he stayed motionless, pinned against the bar as they met mine. It felt like everyone else disappeared in an otherworldly haze as I took him in, desperately trying to read his thoughts, my heart thumping against my chest. To my relief, he gently brushed Helena aside and moved decisively in my direction, pulling me into a fierce embrace when he reached me.
‘Hi,’ I whispered in his ear, holding him tightly to me. My turn now, I thought smugly; I could almost feel Helena’s eyes boring furiously into Jeff’s back.
‘I’m so happy to see you,’ he said excitedly, pulling back, but putting a hand on my cheek and kissing me firmly on the other one before pulling away completely. He took my hand and led me to the bar, where happily Helena no longer stood, and introduced me to the people he was with. I have no idea who they were, I was too busy focusing on Jeff. Luckily he placed a drink in my hand, one of whatever it was they were all drinking, and led me a little further around the ornate, mirror and crystal clad bar, to a secluded table. ‘What are you doing here?’ he asked avidly, taking my hand and repositioning his chair so our knees touched.
‘We came back from the Wild a couple of days ago. Mum wanted to trade our purchases, mum and dad need to get back to academia, and I suppose I need to work out what I’m going to do with the rest of my life.’ Jeff lifted my hand to his lips and my stomach flipped. I was so relieved; he was genuinely happy to see me. ‘When you left Wild Wood…’ I started, but he cut in before I could get the words out.
‘…I’m so sorry. Your dad didn’t really give me any choice but to leave so quickly, he said he was going to tell Tobias about my involvement with the Institution unless I left immediately. Looking back there are so many things I should have said before I left…but it all happened so quickly.’
‘I haven’t heard a thing from you in months.’
He lowered his eyes to the table. ‘I know. I’m sorry. Your dad said if I contacted you and he found out, he would tell Tobias.’
I can’t tell you how angry this made me. The whole point of going to the Wild Lands in the first place was to learn the family trade, to be treated as an adult, yet mum and dad are still trying to make decisions for me. ‘I can deal with mum and dad,’ I said quickly, before I thought about the implications of the words.
Jeff looked at me with unreadable eyes and I flushed bright red. ‘I mean, sorry, you’ve probably moved on…you and Helena…’
He laughed. Loudly. ‘There is absolutely nothing going on between me and Helena. We had a very short fling two years ago and nothing has ever happened since. She’s just like that; she’s marking her territory; she doesn’t like or trust new people, especially new girls,’ he said, eyes flashing as he grinned knowingly.
I smiled inwardly. ‘Who is she anyway?’
‘She’s a member too. She’s also a very gifted Body. She’s about to become an academic and is working here until she does. It works quite well actually, there’s a back room here used for private dinners and high stakes card games that we use for meetings. It’s perfect for us to have someone like Helena keeping tabs on who is coming and going.’
‘What exactly is the Institution?’ I fired the question at him like a poisoned bullet, needing to hear in his words what all the fuss was about.
He took a breath, considering what to say. ‘In a nut shell, it’s an organisation centuries old, dedicated to preserving energy stability.’
‘I thought that’s what the Descendants were here to do?’
‘No. They’re here to send the relic back and free the world, it’s totally different.’
‘But the consequence of sending the relic back would be stable energy, so the end goal is the same.’
‘Only if you believe that the Descendants really want to send the relic back. They don’t seem to be trying very hard and Austin has just made a move to ban energy research, almost certainly at the direction, and obviously with the support, of his father.’
I thought then of Christiana, my mother’s best friend, my Godmother, the ruling Body Descendant, and I found it hard to believe someone so just and kind could fail to act on the oath they had sworn when invested in power. ‘I can believe Tobias would think like that, but Christiana? Philip? Peter? Anthony? I can’t believe the Body and Spirit Descendants would go along with that too.’
‘Well you should believe it, Clarissa,’ a delicious shiver ran down my spine when he said my name, ‘think about it, what have they ever done to try and find a way to send the relic back?’
Now he mentioned it, I couldn’t think of a single thing. I was going to say something about how I was sure they conducted research and held meetings on it in private, but this would have sounded thin even if my mother, Christiana’s best friend, had ever mentioned a conversation with her about sending the relic back, which she hadn’t. Instead, I said, ‘is that why Peter’s involved with the Institution as well?’
He nodded, a slow, purposeful movement. It was rare for him to be so serious, so I wondered in silence what was causing it. Before I could find the words to ask, he changed the subject. ‘So what are you going to do with your life?’ he asked flippantly, his usual devil-may-care attitude back in play.
‘Gods, not you too?’
My avoidance tactics are getting better since the endless tirade of questions and ‘helpful’ suggestions from my parents on this topic, but it didn’t even begin to deter him. Instead, he used his own manoeuver to throw me off guard, slowly leaning across the table and moving his face towards mine. ‘I think you’re evading the question,’ he murmured, as he ran his nose across my cheek, inhaling deeply. He pulled back a little, eyes alight and playful. ‘I want an answer,’ he said softly, placing a feather light kiss on my cheek bone. ‘I demand an answer,’ his voice was husky now, as he moved to the other side and kissed my neck, his warm breath sending shivers running down my spine, the intoxicating scent of his cologne mixed with cocktails and cigars making me light-headed.
‘Well maybe I don’t want to give you an answer,’ I whispered temptingly into his ear, nipping his ear lobe mischievously as I moved away.
‘Well then I shall have to do something to persuade you,’ he said roguishly, taking my hand and lifting it to his lips as his eyes poured into mine. As he did it, a new found intensity somehow washed over him, the mood changing, a potent, palpable, stillness settling around us. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and then, without another word, stood up abruptly, dropped my hand, and made his way swiftly towards his friends at the bar. I watched him go, looking dashing in his dinner jacket, the line of his hard stomach hinted at below his crisp white shirt. He isn’t what you would call muscular, he’s too thin for that, but he has an aura of strength around him, an aura as captivating to me as ever.
He returned and held out his hand for mine, an unscrupulous smile playing around his lips. My head was saying, ‘it’s late,’ and ‘I should go,’ or ‘I’m supposed to be trading chilli powder in the market tomorrow, and I need to get my beauty sleep before I do,’ but the words wouldn’t come. Instead, I took his hand and stood, in a deliberate, provocative way, a salacious mist settling around me as I met his smouldering eyes. We paused there for a moment, a spell around us, until he turned unexpectedly away, keeping hold of my hand and drawing me behind him. We descended the marble steps, walked past Helena, who gave me another dirty look, and emerged into the cool night air, where Jeff wrapped a warm, protective arm around me and lead me down the cobbled street.
After a couple of minutes, as my energy was finally starting to settle down, I realised we were going totally the wrong way. ‘You do know my guest house is the other way,’ I said casually.
‘Is it?’ he replied offhandedly, ‘that’s a relief. I guessed you were staying at the Rollister, but the Petersburg was also an option, which is this way. It would be such a shame to cut the evening short when it’s such a lovely night for a stroll down to the harbour.’ He was lying of course, and to prove it, at that moment, large splotches of rain water started exploding on the cobbles around us. We laughed and he dropped his arm from my shoulder, seizing my hand and pulling me into a run. ‘Come on,’ he said, ‘my place isn’t that far from here.’
We ran through the streets, the rain so heavy there were already pools of water collecting between the cobbles, Jeff careful to avoid them. I’m not really sure why he bothered, as by the time we fell through his front door we were both drenched to the bone. He pushed the door closed behind us and somehow, as though it were part of the same movement, pulled me to him, his lips hovering just above mine for several tantalising beats, my body like a coiled spring demanding to be released, every cell silently screaming at him, as his eyes reticently studied the lips they wanted him to kiss. And then, with a strange kind of illicit hesitance, he lowered his lips to mine, pulling at the soft, impatient skin he found there, slowly at first, and then, like he was gradually winning some silent, undecided, internal battle, building until his mouth moved with a desperate urgency, his hands on the small of my back, pulling me to him, mine grabbing handfuls of his hair. He won his inner fight, picking me up and carrying me to his bedroom, where his deft and dominant hands undid first my belt and then the zip that held my dress in place. It fell unceremoniously to the floor, along with his shoes, jacket, tie, and shirt. He led me to the bed, pushed me onto my back and climbed on top, looking down at me with unseeing, reckless eyes.
*****
Afterwards, we lay in silence, my head on his chest, his hand playing lightly along my arm, when he suddenly rolled me onto my back, his head above mine. ‘Stay with me,’ he said coarsely, ‘in Kingdom. Don’t go back to Empire.’
I looked up at him, considering his words as he ran inquisitive fingers across my lips, cheek, neck. ‘What would I do here?’
‘I don’t know. Any number of things. You could trade? Look after your parents’ business affairs here? Or just live with me and I’ll look after you.’
I couldn’t help but laugh. ‘No contact for four months and then this? What about my parents telling Tobias?’
‘You said yourself you can take care of them.’
I looked up at him, trying to read his unreadable eyes. ‘Okay,’ I said simply, easily, the word just came out, like it had a mind of its own.
His face broke i
nto a broad smile and he hugged me, rolling onto his back and pulling me with him, refusing to let me go. He kissed me again before allowing me wriggle back to the comfort of his chest, arms wrapped around me like they would never let me go.
I managed to make it back to the Rollister early enough so only the receptionist knew of my night time absence. She smiled indulgently before averting her gaze; I took this as a clear signal she would pretend she hadn’t seen me. I’d come back bare foot, carrying my shoes, with one of Jeff’s shirts over the top of my still damp dress. He’d insisted on walking me back, but I’d made him leave me at the end of the road for safety, giving him a brief peck on the lips and telling him I’d see him later. He’d pulled me back for a proper, final kiss and then let me go. I looked back when I reached the front door and he hadn’t moved an inch, still watching my every step. I rolled my eyes, smiled and blew him a sarcastic kiss before making my way in as quietly as I could…’
‘Not sure I’d write all that in a diary,’ Anita laughed as she closed the notebook.
‘Me neither,’ replied Alexander, grabbing Anita roguishly and kissing her passionately before letting her go, laughing. He lay back on the grass and looked up at the moon that had now appeared in the dying light of day. ‘So what do you think Helena’s getting at?’
‘I honestly don’t know. Still don’t think we’ve got to the crux of it. All the stuff Jeff says about the Institution is basically a carbon copy of what Helena told me, so I don’t think that’s it. It seems like the Descendants were the same then as they are now; Tobias was certainly viewed a great deal like Austin is today. I don’t know, what do you think?’ Anita was trying to concentrate on the matter in hand but the base of Alexander’s muscular stomach had been revealed as he lay down and there was nothing she could do to stop herself from reaching out and running a hand over the exposed, washboard flesh.