Cream Cheese Frosting:
4 cups confectioners' sugar
8 ounces cream cheese
1 cup or 2 sticks unsalted butter
1/2 teaspoon salt
4 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
Combine the sugar, cream cheese, butter, salt, and vanilla extract in a large mixing bowl and blend for 2 minutes.
And finally, the Queen’s Revenge, take a small dusting of pink peppercorn and carefully sprinkle the tops of each cupcake. Both sweet and spicy!
* * *
Leonard’s Awesome Lemon Curd: Words in parenthesis courtesy of Momma Leonard…
* * *
Ingredients
5 egg yolks
1 cup sugar
4 lemons, zested and juiced
1 stick butter, cut into pats and chilled
Directions
Add enough water to a medium saucepan to come about 1-inch up the side. Bring to a simmer over medium-high heat. Meanwhile, combine egg yolks and sugar in a medium size metal bowl (mind the fur now… ‘tis quite disgusting should any get into the concoction) and whisk until smooth, about 1 minute. Measure citrus juice and if needed, add enough cold water to reach 1/3 cup. Add juice and zest to egg mixture and whisk smooth. Once water reaches a simmer, reduce heat to low and place bowl on top of saucepan. (Bowl should be large enough to fit on top of saucepan without touching the water.) Whisk until thickened, approximately 8 minutes (or 20 twitches of me whiskers), or until mixture is light yellow and coats the back of a spoon. Remove promptly from heat and stir in butter a piece at a time, allowing each addition to melt before adding the next. Remove to a clean container and cover by laying a layer of plastic wrap directly on the surface of the curd. Refrigerate for up to 2 weeks.
* * *
And Leonard being Leonard, he wanted me to let you know that some good old fashioned English scones are a must to truly savor the tangy sweetness of his momma’s curd.
Leonard’s Awesome Scones:
Ingredients
3 cups flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter
1 cup buttermilk
1 tablespoon heavy cream, for brushing
Directions
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Combine the flour, sugar, salt, baking powder and baking soda in a large bowl. Add butter and mix with your fingertips to a coarse meal. Add buttermilk and mix just until combined. Add currants, if desired.
Transfer dough to a floured board and divide into 2 parts. Roll each to 3/4 inch thick rounds. Cut each round into 8 wedges and place slightly separated on a greased baking sheet. Brush the tops with the cream, and bake for 15 minutes, or until lightly browned. Serve warm, split in half and slather with lemon curd.
Hatter says it tastes best with a good Earl Grey.
Untitled
Gerard’s Beauty
“Bad boys need love too…”
* * *
Betty Hart has had it with men. Jilted in love, her life now consists of shelving books by day, watching too much Anime by night, and occasionally larping on the weekends with her fellow ‘Bleeding Heart Rebel’ nerds. Men are not welcome and very much unwanted. Especially the sexy Frenchman who saunters into her library reeking of alcohol and looking like he went one too many rounds in the ring.
Gerard Caron is in trouble. Again. Caught with his pants down (literally) he’s forced to seek asylum on Earth while his fairy godmother tries to keep Prince Charming from going all ‘Off with his head’. Maybe, messing around with the King’s daughter hadn’t been such a great idea after all, not that Gerard knew the silly redhead was a princess. But his fairy godmother knows the only way to save his life is to finally pair Gerard with his perfect mate, whether he’s willing or not.
From the moment Gerard lays eyes on the nerdy librarian he knows he must have her, but Betty is unlike any woman he’s ever known. He thought Betty would come as willingly to his bed as every other woman before her, but she is a woman who demands respect and even… horror of all horrors… love. Is it possible for a self-proclaimed Casanova to change his ways?
Untitled
Gerard’s Beauty
* * *
by
* * *
Marie Hall
Untitled
Gerard’s Beauty
Copyright Marie Hall 2012
Cover Art by Claudia McKinney of Phatpuppy Copyright October 2012
Photographer, Teresa Yeh
Model, Danny
Edited by Brent Taylor
Formatted by L.K. Campbell
* * *
This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Marie Hall, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in the context of reviews.
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this ebook with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. Thank you for respecting the hard work of all people involved with the creation of this ebook.
Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Marie Hall. Unauthorized or restricted use in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.
The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patent Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork.
* * *
[email protected]
MarieHallWrites.blogspot.com
* * *
Published in 2012 by Marie Hall, Honolulu, Hawaii, United States of America
To Iliana. Because you are perfect just the way you are…
Chapter 15
Danika—fairy godmother extraordinaire—blazed through the night like a tiny falling star.
Damn that pompous bastard Gerard.
She shivered, holding her wand tight to her heaving bosom. Trying to think up a few more bad words for the odious man, but words failed her. He’d turned her into a laughing stock in front of her peers.
Galeta the blue-- Head Mistress of Fairy Godmother Inc.-- threatened to rip Danika’s title from her. From her! How dare they even insinuate that she’d lost control of her charges?
Of course Gerard’s pending trial only strengthened their allegations. The oaf. If he’d only kept his nose clean like she’d implicitly instructed. But the man was incapable of thinking with something other than the snake in his pants. She’d hoped after his last trial he’d be a little more thoughtful of whom he seduced. Last time they’d been lucky that the father had been willing to settle the debt for a few gold coins. She doubted gold would appease this situation.
Cinderella’s daughter… of all the lass’ Gerard could have beguiled, why her? Now Prince Charming was all ‘off-with-his-head’ and Danika had a serious problem on her hands.
She ground her molars so hard her jaw ached. “Relax, Danika. Must not allow yourself to get angry.” Even though she suffered a violent urge to turn Gerard into a toad, it would only prove to her peers she had lost control and unfortunately it was not a viable option. Using magic for revenge was the very thing that’d cursed Jinni to non-genie status. Danika had no desire to be striped of her powers as well.
She beat her wings faster, streaking through the trees with a furious buzz.
She had to get to Gerard first, before the angry mob could get their hands on him. Thankfully she’d sic’d the best tracker in the Kingdom on him, and
just received the missive she’d been waiting weeks to get. Gerard had been found. And not a moment too soon.
For tonight the jury and tribunal convened-- comprised of jilted lovers, fathers with revenge on their minds, and the three most powerful godmothers in the land-- if she could get Gerard out of Kingdom, perhaps she could convince the court he’d not return unless reformed.
Perhaps... just perhaps, that would be enough to mollify the crowd and prevent a retaliatory execution.
And after her smashing success with the Hatter and his Alice. None had thought that romance possible. She’d proven them wrong, had made a true love match. In fact, the two were so in love it bordered on disgusting.
But now none of that mattered, thanks to the French baboon. If Danika had been smarter she’d have known Gerard planned to flee. He, more than the others, hated the very notion of love. After Alice and Hatter’s successful match Gerard had become withdrawn and quiet. That was so unlike the gregarious Frenchman that at first Danika had thought him jealous. What a fool she’d been to let him have his space. She’d thought nothing of his leaving, but as time progressed and he’d not returned, an awful suspicion rose in her gut.
He’d gotten himself into trouble.
By that point so much time had passed his trail had gone cold. She’d searched his favorite haunts, to no avail. Out of sheer desperation she’d questioned the flowers, as they always knew what was what, but the flowers had been less than helpful. One saw this, another that, but none could pinpoint him accurately. It seemed the moment his location was discovered, he’d hie himself off to the next pair of plump arms and ample bosom.
The man was a nitwit. Did he not see she had his best interest at heart? But maybe it was her fault for the whole Belle debacle.
To Danika’s credit making a love match was no easy feat. Still she did feel partly responsible. The night Belle had married the Beast she thought Gerard had gone as mad as the Hatter.
Gerard had gotten thick in his cups-- face splotchy and red-- sniveling that Belle was a tramp all along and he’d known and wouldn’t have her anyway. However the insult of her marriage was nothing compared to the greater insult he believed he’d suffered afterwards.
Forced anonymity.
Through the ages mortals had learned of the lives and roles of the Kingdom’s inhabitants through song and tale. All knew of Hook’s obsession with Pan, Wolf’s run in with Red’s grandmother-- but of Gerard, well... he wasn’t even a cliff note in a text book. He simply did not exist outside of Kingdom. Ironic, since his story was easily one of the better known, but... as he’d so often done, he’d screwed the pooch (to use an oft used Earth phrase). He’d angered the wrong people and they’d exacted their revenge. Danika might have felt sorry for him if he were anyone else, but Gerard was Gerard. He angered everyone.
Spying Leonard’s lighted gardens in the distance she sighed, feeling a little more in control of herself now that she could act. Danika alighted on the empty tea table. “Wolf,” she hissed.
A shaggy black shadow pulled away from the tree. His long pink tongue lolled out the corner of his fanged jaws. Huffing, he appeared to be laughing in his dog like way.
“Did you find him then?”
The Big Bad Wolf dipped his head, and turning, trotted back to the tree he’d hidden behind earlier. A flash of white light lit the rose garden and then a tall, muscularly built man stepped out from behind the tree.
The books had it all wrong. Shifters never turned human with clothes on. They returned to human form as nude as the day they were born. His muscles, like thick ropes, flexed as he strode back out. She fanned her flushed face, entranced by his predatory loping grace, even on two feet, he walked like a beast.
My, but her boys were pretty. She cleared her throat, attempting to remember why she was here.
Eyes, the golden shade of a lion’s hue, glinted back at her. “I’ve brought him.” His throaty growl made her shiver. “He seduced a mermaid, was hiding out in her lair.” He spat, disgust evident in his tone.
“Yes, well, you know how he is. No woman can resist him. Beautiful, abhorrent man.” She pursed her lips.
He lifted a shaggy black brow. “Do you think it’s fair then, what you’ve planned? Not that I care about the bastard, but the woman.”
Ah, her wolf always did have a soft spot for the female form. Much maligned he’d been for eating Red’s grandmother, though the stories were mostly exaggerated.
“I must.” She shook her fists, her wand spurted with firework bursts of energy. “’Tis more than a mere matter of finding his mate. He’s in danger of losing his very life.”
He frowned and rubbed his stubbled jaw. “I see. Well, then. He’s behind that tree. Bound and gagged, as ordered.” He pointed to a gnarled oak.
She smirked and started toward it.
“Our bargain?” he asked quietly, a low growl undercut his words.
She bit her lip, heart speeding just a tad. Danika had kind of promised him something. The godmothers were not going to like it. She wrinkled her nose, rubbing her forehead, bit of a pickle that situation.
“Danika,” his voice grew sharper, more wolf like, less human.
“Yes, yes, bloody hell, Wolf. As I’ve promised.”
His nostrils flared, as if he were trying to scent her out. Sweating below her collar, she gripped her wand tighter. She did not lie, though perhaps she’d embellished the truth a wee tiny bit. But no need to let him know that.
Just yet.
Her grin wobbled.
His lips thinned as he finally nodded. “Aye, then. You know where to find me.”
“I do indeed.” She watched him go. “Oh my.” He was really not going to like what she’d done. But then again, neither would anyone else.
“I do what I must,” she sighed, as she rounded the oak. Being a godmother was often a thankless job. It’d only taken her two hundred and fifty years and twenty ones days (but who was counting) to stop being offended by it. Though every once in a while, it still rankled.
Like now, when her boys should be deliriously happy by the prospect of finding their match. Not like she’d asked them to chew their own leg off. Her mouth curled. Given the choice between self mutilation or marriage, she wasn’t sure which they’d choose. But she was almost 99 percent positive it wouldn’t be the girls.
Stupid men.
Case in point, Gerard,-- hog-tied at the base of the tree-- eyes closed, hair disheveled and filled with bits of bramble. He’d looked better. And had obviously fought like a rabid dog to escape Danika’s clutches.
Danika walked to him, the closer she got, the more overpowering the odor of alcohol became. She pinched her nose, getting woozy.
Gerard was covered in gashes and scrapes. A long cut ran under his right eye, a slight bluish tinted bruise shaded his cheek, and she was sure he’d not be able to do much more than sip liquid nourishment for the next day or two. Swollen and bloody, his lips were painful even to gaze upon.
Wolf, perhaps, had been a bit too thorough in bringing him back.
She rolled her eyes. “Fine mess this is, Gerard.” Though angry with him, her heart ached to see him like this.
He’d been jovial once. Oh, he’d always had a touch of the devil in him-- no doubt-- but good where it’d mattered most. Not since Belle though, and especially not since the night his legacy had been forever tainted by lies and half truths.
Danika tsked. “I should let you face their wrath, Gerard. Truly I should. No less than you deserve.” Her words were tough, but her touch was soft as she gently caressed his smooth brow. Even after all he put her through, she still loved him. Loved them all, they were her boys, and she’d fight to the death to protect them.
He snorted and then sneezed, showering her in a cloud of dust. She shuddered and stepped away from his mouth.
“Sad, pathetic man you are now.” She shook her head. He gave a soft moan, whether he understood her or not, she wasn’t sure. “Yes, I said it. Pathetic.”
/> “Non,” he grimaced and twitched, as if becoming aware of the bonds that held him.
She coughed and waved her hand in front of her nose. “This is horrible. Horrible!” She stomped her foot. “Gerard, she’ll be terrified of you. You look like a beggar. No. Worse. You look like a beggar who’s been waylaid in a distillery vat. If this were any other time I’d wait.”
“Bloody Wolf.” He spit a crimson streak. “Told him I’d come.”
“Yes, I’m sure you were quite the angel. Wolf completely in the wrong.” She crossed her arms and tapped her foot.
He cracked open a blood shot eye and shifted, trying to move to a sitting position. His body jerked and he groaned, laying his face back down in the dirt. “Perhaps I did attempt to cold cock him first. Bit fuzzy on that.”
“Of course you did.” She pointed her wand at his bonds, a bright pink glow wrapped around the leather hide on his wrists and ankles.
Gingerly, he sat up and rubbed his chapped wrists. Taking a deep breath, he winced. “I think the bastard broke a rib.” He felt around his waist. When she didn’t respond to his obvious ploy to baby him, he sighed. “Fine. Fine,” his deep French lilt grew heavy with exasperation. “I concede. You made your point, but you cannot bring her here with me looking like this.”
She leaned back on her heels. His shirt was shredded in several spots. One-- a particularly long rip along his chest-- exposed the tiny bud of a brown nipple. Blood stained his collar. But it was his pants, with the laces loosened, that told the true tale. Wolf had obviously found Gerard rutting like a mad fool. She lifted a brow, looking back at him.
[Kingdom 01.0 - 03.0] Kingdom Series Collection Page 14