But, in his right hand was something extremely real, and very substantial. Once again he bowed his head, leaning the top of the staff against his forehead, while he gripped it with both hands. For a long moment he stood there like that, silent and still, the glow-ball hovering over him like a blessing, energy surging up from the earth through the oaken branch and through the man, mingling where they touched and binding them powerfully together. When he finally stood erect and walked out of the room, staff in hand, he felt for the first time in every fiber of his being that he was indeed a wizard.
ELEVEN
Delphine Again
AS HE STEPPED BACK INTO the gardens, Tvrdik realized by the sun’s position and his awakening hunger that the best of the day was behind him. Having assessed the entire project, he felt he would be better off beginning the real work in the morning, after a night’s rest. He was reluctant to relinquish his newly discovered staff, since it already felt like a part of his anatomy. But he could not risk it being seen at Theriole. So, leaning it just inside the front door, he conjured a little assistance arranging and putting away all the items which had been delivered to the grounds from the market. Then he physically locked the front door and reset its magical password, adding a bit of his own sorcery to hide the tools and building materials, neatly stacked in the yard, from any would-be pilferer. Heading back up the riverwalk to Theriole, he turned back once, reflecting on all he had seen and experienced in the house that afternoon, and on the memories beginning to surface as a result. He would have to keep these thoughts to himself, closely guarding his true identity for the moment. Soon enough, he mused, soon enough it would all be a matter of public knowledge; he had best enjoy his anonymity while he could. Meanwhile, tomorrow promised to be a very full day.
The sun dipped lower as he approached the palace. He was considering the possibility of trying to wheedle some dinner out of the kitchen staff, when he noticed, on the same bench as the day before, a lone figure with auburn hair. It was most certainly Delphine, in her accustomed spot, but as he drew nearer, he noticed her swollen eyes and red nose.
“My lady!” he called out, and waved, giving her a chance to arrange herself. Tvrdik frowned, wondering whatever could have brought such an effervescent soul to tears. He took his time on the path, discreetly watching as she wiped her eyes and nose with a delicate handkerchief, smoothed back her hair, and arranged her skirts in an attempt to look nonchalant.
“Well met once again, Lady Delphine. I was out for an afternoon stroll and lost track of the time. Do you suppose I am still in time to scare up a bite to eat?” And now he was by her side and she was smiling up at him.
“Why, Tvrdik! What a pleasant surprise to see you. I was just about to go in to supper myself. You must come along and tell me all about what you’ve been up to today.” Her broad smile looked so out of place on that swollen, blotchy face that it broke his heart. Tvrdik was aware that to a girl of seventeen, he might appear positively ancient, a member of another generation who could not possibly understand the way things were. And yet, she had been so open and warm yesterday, and in a way, they were both misfits. He could well imagine how a girl of her high position might find herself without many true friends in whom to confide. He made a sudden decision, sat down on the bench beside her, and leaned in close.
“Supper will wait a little longer if there is something on your mind that needs airing. In my own country I have some reputation as a good listener, and look...broad shoulders as well…hmmm?” The smile faded from her face as she stared at him, speechless, and then, in a heartbeat, she had collapsed in sobs on his breast. A little surprised, he made an awkward attempt to fold his arms around her, comforting. “There, there, what’s this?” he cooed, “You are a beautiful, intelligent, noble young woman who is very much in love with a wonderful young man who adores her. It is springtime and the gardens are lovely. What could be so terrible that will not pass?”
She tried to collect herself, and straightened up on the bench, “Oh, Tvrdik, I am so sorry. Here we have only just met one another, and what a foolish goose you must think me. I – I don’t know what came over me. But somehow, I do feel you are someone to be trusted.”
He made a sign at his mouth, “Not a word to anyone. And no judgment here. Trust me when I say I have had my share of moments like this.” The girl smiled despite herself, even laughed a bit, and her face lit up beneath her tears like sunshine vying with a passing shower. Tvrdik continued, “There. That’s more like the Delphine I remember from yesterday. Now, is there anything I can do to fix whatever it is that has upset you so?” he queried, gently taking her handkerchief and dabbing at her cheeks.
“I doubt it. It’s my sister (the word was spoken as if it tasted awful in her pretty mouth). Sometimes she just infuriates me. Ugghhh!” This last was a visceral explosion of pent-up frustration that went beyond language. “I can’t stay mad at her…she’s my best friend, and I adore her. I know how difficult things are for her right now, but why must she torment me so?”
“What happened?”
“She invited me to lunch with her today, and I was overjoyed, partly at the prospect of spending some real time with her at last, and partly as I was expecting some further news about the wedding…”
“Did she bring it up?”
“Did she bring it up? I’ll say. She told me it was out of the question. I was stunned. I thought Mark had impressed her – that she even liked him. I mean, who could not like Mark, I ask you? I thought that we had made a good case for our plans…our hopes and dreams…I thought that she cared about my happiness. But all she said was, ‘Delphine, it’s just out of the question right now; you will have to put it out of your mind for the moment.’ Out of my mind? She’s driving me out of my mind.” Delphine was becoming increasingly agitated as she relived the unfortunate encounter, and hot tears were beginning to appear again.
Tvrdik interjected, “Did she say why?”
“When I asked her for a reason, she couldn’t give me one, exactly. She kept saying that she had new information about things coming up that she couldn’t speak of, but that starting anything new right now, like a life together, was a bad idea, and I should just trust her on this and obey. I asked her if she had a problem with Mark, or with me, and she kept saying, no, she liked Mark well enough, but that I was just going to have to believe her that she was making this decision for my own good. Can you imagine?”
Tvrdik straightened – he knew what all this was about. “And what did you say to her?”
“I told her she didn’t know anything about what was for my good anymore, that I was no longer a child she could control. She told me I was acting childishly and should therefore be treated as a child, and that she had far more serious matters to deal with than her sister’s hurt feelings at not getting her own way. And then we had a horrible fight, and I’m sure both of us said things we didn’t mean. I stormed out of there and have been sitting here ever since trying to figure out what to do. Oh, Tvrdik, why doesn’t she understand how important this is to me? Why does she insist on hurting me like this? Why can’t she be happy for me? Am I really asking so very much?” Tvrdik’s mouth moved but nothing came out. The girl’s voice drooped, “Do you think it could be that she is jealous of me? That she doesn’t want me to marry first? I would never have believed something so vile about my own sister. And besides, all of her life she has had Tashroth – she’s never been alone, and now she would begrudge me the companion I so long for?”
Tvrdik, blushing, shook his head, “I – I don’t think that’s it at all,” he stammered.
Delphine’s face snapped back toward him, and her eyes met his square on, “What then? Why is she doing this to me?”
Tvrdik paused a long moment. He knew exactly what was going through Jorelial Rey’s mind, as it had already gone through his own. But he felt for this young woman, so earnest, so hurt that the one person she relied upon had seemed to d
ismiss her. How much could he say? How could he help without going too far? He grasped the distraught, disheveled girl by her shoulders, and looked her straight in the eye.
“Delphine, listen to me. I am truly sorry that you are feeling ill-used right now, but you do not know all the facts.”
“What do you mean? Tell me.”
Tvrdik sighed, “Well, as I am here on something of a diplomatic mission, I actually know something of the circumstances to which the Lady Rey is referring. I am not at liberty to divulge the details, but I can tell you that your sister is afraid that this kingdom might be going to war soon, and the world will become a very dangerous place.”
Delphine’s face clouded, “A war? That’s ridiculous. There has not been any such thing as a war here in living memory. We have no enemies.”
“A child holds the throne and there are those who might see that as an opportunity to take what is not theirs. It would be wonderful if I am proven wrong, but if I am not, your sister cannot let that happen. Much chaos and unhappiness may lie ahead for everyone. I can only guess that she feels it is unwise for you to begin your new life now, when so much is uncertain.”
Delphine’s face changed as her perspective shifted, “Why, if all that is true, then why won’t she be honest with me? Poor Rel. What a horrible burden to be carrying and the silly goose won’t even talk to me about her fears and suspicions…”
“I’m sure she doesn’t want to spoil these days of your youth with so much heaviness…”
Delphine jumped up off the bench, “Well, if that was her aim, she’s done a fair job of missing the target, hasn’t she? My days are spoiled already as long as she denies me happiness, and then lets me think she is just being a witch about it for no good reason…she’s wrong, you know.”
“Pardon?”
“She’s looking at this all wrong. If the future looks so grim, all the more reason for us all to chase the sparks of happiness and love as we find them, to value the connections that make us whole, to focus on the truest parts of life that will always endure. She never did get that, about people and relationships.” Delphine threw up her hands in a gesture of dismissal, and began to pace, mostly talking to herself now. Tvrdik sat on the bench alone, his mouth fallen open in wonder at the wisdom that was pouring out from this almost-child, who moments before had been sobbing, inconsolable, into his vest. The girl went on, a tone of confidence entering her voice, “Someone is going to have to sit her down and make her see how she is looking at this all wrong. And that it isn’t healthy for her to keep trying to carry all of these burdens and responsibilities alone….”
Tvrdik cleared his throat loudly. The maiden stopped in her tracks and turned to him, looking surprised to find him still sitting there on the bench.
“Um, Delphine? If you go and tell the Lady Rey – your sister – that you know all about the war, and that you want to make some suggestions – and mind you, I quite agree that they might be good ones – but, you see, she is going to want to know exactly where you got that information. And it might not go so well for me if she finds out that it was I who told you.”
Delphine cocked her head at him for a moment while a range of expressions played across her face. For a heartbeat, she resembled Ondine so much it was almost eerie. Then, without warning, she flew to the bench and threw her arms around him in a spontaneous and rather thorough embrace.
“Oh, Tvrdik, you dear, dear man! You have been such an angel. I really do understand everything so much better now. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And don’t worry at all. Rel will never know what we spoke of here; I would never get you into trouble. I just knew when I first met you that you would be lucky for us all. Come on. Let’s go and see if we can find something good to eat. I’m famished.” She took him by the hand and pulled him to his feet, then off down the road toward the giant front doors of Theriole. Tvrdik couldn’t think of a thing to say. Perhaps it was hunger, or weariness, but his brain seemed to be spinning, and the only distinct impression he could pin down was that life with this woman would be, most definitely, an adventure.
Had Delphine even attempted at that moment to find her sister and set things to right, she would not have found her in the palace. Jorelial Rey had finally snapped, and was even then clinging to Tashroth’s broad shoulders, en route to a favorite retreat of theirs in the mountains. The pristine lake that filled an old crater was only accessible by air, and was the perfect regenerative spot to hide from anyone and everyone who might be searching for the Lady Regent, wanting a ‘moment of her time.’ Jorelial knew she would not be disturbed here. She also knew she could not justify disappearing for long at such a critical moment. But the endless parade of petitioners, the weight of the knowledge she carried, and the unpleasant episode with her beloved sister had combined to fray her last nerve, and she wisely realized she would be of no use to anyone without a brief period of solitude and regeneration.
The air was bracing in this mountain retreat. The sharp scent of evergreens purged every muddled thought and untangled all the knots of confusion. A profound silence that seemed almost primordial wrapped itself around the crater, but on deeper examination revealed a tapestry of natural music pieced together from birdsong, the creak of swaying trees, the distinctive calls of frogs and locusts searching for companionship. While Tashroth hunted for his supper, Jorelial swam in the icy waters, then dried herself on the stony shore, under a low, but still warm sun. As dusk fell, they sat in easy silence for awhile by the lake’s edge, a roaring campfire that Tashroth had breathed into existence upon kindling Jorelial had gathered, taking the chill out of the air. She had brought along bread and cheese and dried fruit, and sat idly chewing and staring off at the distant fading sunset. Finally, as if the conversation had already been flowing for ages, “Tash, I hated to leave Delphine in such a state. I know I lost my temper, but did I make the wrong decision? Was I too hard on her?”
The deep, organ-toned voice rolled, “You know that I try not to tell you how to think, or what to do, little one, but tell me why you deny her?”
Jorelial raised her eyebrows, a bit surprised. “Well, I have nothing against this Mark fellow. He seems to have a good head on his shoulders, and I believe he really cares for her. But she is so young. I’m not sure she truly knows her own heart. And the future is so uncertain now. We don’t know where we’ll be in a year, or five. We could be at war, or, heaven forbid, we could lose control of the kingdom. They could be parted, or destitute, or worse. I just don’t want her heart broken, and I can protect her better if I can keep her here with me. Surely it isn’t too much to ask them to wait and see if the relationship will weather the coming storm. A girl like her will have so many opportunities in the future – gods willing there is a future for all of us.”
“And how would you have responded to someone who sought to part us from one another ten years ago? I seem to recall those who claimed that it was not appropriate for a fine young lady of marriageable age to be spending all her free time with a savage beast, hmmm?”
“Well, we never listened to those old biddies, dearest. We have always been together, and we always will be. No one could force us apart. What? Oh, come on, don’t look at me like that; it’s entirely different. You have been my companion since I was born, and we weren’t facing such chaos in the world back then.”
“Would the world situation have mattered to you then, or anything but what your heart told you? Jorelial Rey… (whenever he whispered her whole name intimately like that, Jorelial’s bones nearly melted), wise or foolish, right or wrong, the heart has its own compass that guides us to the source of its fulfillment. Thought may see obstacles, and differences, but the heart’s compass points true north, and will not be swayed by reason or argument. Your sister may be young, but you know she is constant when her desire fixes on something. You have seen this over and over; you have laughed at it, and cursed over it. You might call her stubborn. Or you might say she
follows where her heart’s guidance leads. Is that a thing to be despised or envied? Who can tell?”
“Are you saying I should let her marry the bard? Put aside any misgivings and my better judgment?”
“I am saying she is likely to pursue her heart’s desire, with or without your consent, and if you wish to keep her in your life, you would best not try to restrain her, or put more obstacles in her path. What she longs for is for you to rejoice with her in her newfound happiness.”
“You think she would defy me? I can’t imagine such a thing. But it certainly is not my intention to force her hand, or to push her away. I am miserable without Delphine. Look at me now. I couldn’t bear our being estranged for long. I’m only trying to be a good guardian to her, trying to think what our father might have done. I can’t help feeling responsible.”
“Dearest, on this plane, you cannot stop the hands of time. She is growing up and finding her own path. You can no longer keep her in innocence, or protect her from experience. You can only love her, and be her refuge if she is ever knocked down.”
“That is what you did for me, isn’t it, Tash?”
“It is what I try to do every day.”
“Was it hard, to let go, I mean? To let me fall on my face sometimes?” The fire flickered and almost went out, under a gusty dragon sigh.
“Yes…and no. You are headstrong and curious, little one, and often flirt with danger. But it is your journey, and you must make your own way. While I breathe, I will be beside you on that journey, but I trust you, and know you will always find the way to what is right.”
“You are wise, Tashroth, so much wiser than I, and I am a little ashamed at what I have done. I only want Delphine to be happy, and maybe I have not trusted her enough. I do think she is a remarkable soul, and perhaps there is a thing or two I could learn from her. I will think this through again, and I will put things right with her as soon as we return.”
The Last Wizard of Eneri Clare Page 15