A Kingpin Love Affair (A Kingpin Love Affair #1-5)

by J. L. Beck

  “Good. Now bend for me,” I ordered, nudging her forward so she was at an angle with her ass in the air and her knees digging into the edge of the couch. Her heavy breathing surrounded me causing my dick to rise. Down boy. That sweet cunt will be ours soon.

  “Please…” she begged, her eyes pleading with me to give her the release she so desperately needed. I smirked at her, feeling as wicked as ever.

  “You come when I let you.” I settled into her, licking my way from her ass down to her throbbing clit. Every suck, every vibration against it caused her to moan out loud, her pleas filling the room.

  “Please, Alzerro… Please,” she screamed, her legs wobbling as I sucked her clit into my mouth, and at the same time, I slipped two fingers into her slick pussy. She was beyond fucking ready for me, and this pleased me more than anything. To know I was capable of getting her to this point and I offer her both pain and pleasure.

  “You want to come?” My words were filled with sex and desire. She pushed back against my mouth, which earned her a slap on her ass, her bottom growing redder.

  “Yes, plea—” She didn’t even finish her sentence. I had pulled my fingers out of her and removed my mouth from her pussy at the same time as she protested, a growl lingering on her lips.

  “I want you to ride me,” I demanded, falling onto the couch next to her. She smiled, pleased that she was going to get a say on the matter. I gripped her hips, lifting her from her position and onto my awaiting erection. I was more than fucking ready for her.

  She watched me between partly closed lids as she slid down every single inch of me. Her body molding to mine as if months and miles had never separated us. I stared deeply into her eyes watching her hips grind into mine. She was exhilarating, a woman who at one point and time I felt I didn’t deserve.

  “Fucking ride me, Bree...” I growled, fueling her as I wrapped my hand around her hair and pulled her face into my own. Our foreheads pressed against one another as I challenged her to give me every single piece of her.

  Her lip quivered as I felt my balls aching, the need to come was so strong, I wasn’t sure I would last. With one last slam against me, she came. Her walls clenched so hard, I was afraid she had embedded herself on me. My own release soon followed, filling her to the brim with come. She was mine. She was more than that. She was Bree, my wife and mother of my child, and that was all that mattered.

  Chapter Three

  Bree

  When I woke the next morning, my body was thoroughly worked over, a delicious soreness consuming me, reminding me of the previous night’s events the entire day. Zerro watched me, his eyes lingering on every curve of my body, from the tips of my toes to the longest piece of hair on my head.

  Every time I caught him looking at me, a zing of electricity shot through me. I hadn’t felt this way with him in what seemed to be years. How one single look could lead to sex on the kitchen counter, or how one small innocent smile could have me against the wall, his cock driving into me at a pace that was almost painful was exactly what I had been longing for.

  “When I first met you all those years ago, I knew you would be an enigma. The one thing that would cause my world to tilt a little bit more toward the light,” Zerro admitted gruffly as he settled into the chair at the computer desk, checking his emails to make sure he had no important work emails that needed his reply ASAP.

  “Why is that?” I questioned, popping a cherry into my mouth. He stopped typing, his eyes lifting to mine. “Because when you came into my life, you were nothing but a debt. You gave yourself to me as payment, Bree. I never expected anything to come from our transaction, and that was my biggest downfall.” I frowned. I hated thinking that I was one of his biggest downfalls.

  “You think if you had expected something of me, it would be different?” His eyes narrowed at me, frustration settling into his features.

  “I think if I had wanted something from you, things would be different. The fact that I didn’t expect you to be so defiant, the fact you didn’t give into me but held your ground told me you were different, and that alone saved you from being something else.” When he said ‘something else,’ I felt myself drifting back to the moment when he shot and killed a room full of unarmed people—people who owed him a debt that needed to be settled, a debt that was paid in nothing but blood. Could I have been that something else?

  “Oh…” I trailed off, plucking another cherry out of my dish. Water droplets fell from it as I watched Zerro’s eyes hone in on one dangling cherry. I slowly lifted it and placed it into my mouth. My teeth sunk into the fruit, the cherry bursting in my mouth as sweet juices assaulted my taste buds.

  “Oh?” Zerro finally came back to life, having realized I didn’t actually give him an answer.

  “I meant it just seemed so strange for us to have made it so far. To have been two so very different people, yet the same side of a coin.” I could see the vein in his head throbbing, and if I was a betting woman, I would bet something else was throbbing, too.

  “Do you want to piss me off?” he growled his eyes and voice growing dark. I could see his fist clenched against the desk, and for one second, I wondered if there was a chance I could push him too far or if I could unleash the beast within and be unable to control him.

  “If you’re asking me, I would say you’re already there.” The words left my lips like a secret, my voice cool and calm. I could all but see Zerro losing his shit, the questions of his past beating against his exterior walls causing him to break down and answer them.

  He was vulnerable, even weak, and every time I was able to bring the king to his knees, my blood would sing, my eyes would glaze over, and my hands would sweat. The power he placed on me always gave me a rush, as if he was my never-ending supply of a drug I desperately needed.

  “Bree.” He sounded weak as if he was losing his sense of reality as if he could no longer resist my needs, my deepest desires, and my darkest cravings.

  “You say my name like you need me like you want to slide into my wet cunt. But in the next second, you look at me as if you would rather bend me over and spank me until my come is running down my thighs.” I lusted for him, begging for one last wall to splinter. He knew I needed this. He knew his pain, his agony over the past, was not only his burden but mine, as well.

  He ran a hand through his dark hair, my lady bits clenching with a need I didn’t even understand. He raised his eyes to meet mine, and I could see the man who wrapped his hand around my throat as I came all over his cock. All he needed was one more push, one more thrust into the deep end, and he would be able to swim all on his own.

  “I can’t tell you what I want more. To shove my cock in that filthy mouth of yours or slap your ass until it glows red for me.” His admission caused a fire to stir inside of me. He had no idea the power he held over me.

  “Do both,” I blurted out loud, not thinking of the things that could take place from that one request. Truthfully, I wanted him in every single way I could have him. The whole reason I told my father to take Gia was so I could bring back to life the fire in our marriage. Without it, I felt we would burn out and our love would become a thing of the past.

  He stood from his seat, the computer chair hitting the wall. It landed with a loud thud, causing one of the photos above the desk to sway, reminding me of the twisted game I was playing with Zerro.

  “I know what you’re doing!” He commanded my attention with that one single sentence. My body filled with so much life, so much darkness. I craved it. I craved him.

  “Then let me do it! Let the walls down... You have nothing to be afraid of!” I shouted at him, my own face growing red with anger.

  An icy glare was shot my way as I could feel the temperature rising.

  “I was once an evil man. A man who would’ve killed anything that crossed him the wrong way.” He came to stand in front of me. His height, his body, his menacing stance caused my body to go into hypertension. Zerro’s hand reached out, pushing the locks of hai
r behind my ear. The motion was soft and gentle, something I didn’t expect from him. Something I didn’t want.

  “I’ve watched you kill. I’ve seen you covered in blood. I’ve even killed for you.” My declaration came out as nothing but a whisper. I knew he heard it though as his eyes lifted, going straight to the wall behind me.

  “I’m not him anymore. I’m not a callous killer, and I’m not going to put you through whatever it is you want from me just because you want that other person back.” The air filled with tension. Did I want to go against this bull, could I handle the horns? The pain I would cause myself?

  “You are him...” I growled, my hand slamming against his chest. Zerro raised an eyebrow at me in warning. “Underneath all this bullshit is the man I fell in love with. The man who made love to me and fucked me like he meant it when I needed it. The man who killed for me, the man who gave me our first child, and the man who I married,” I shouted, the words falling from my lips without a care.

  “I. Am. Not,” he shouted back. How had we gotten here? Tears were threatening to fall from my eyes, but I held them back, not allowing my emotions to get the best of me.

  “You are. He’s in here. I can feel it. With every stroke of your cock inside me, every beat of your heart against my own tells me he is right there.” I poked him in the chest. “Right underneath your flesh, waiting for the one moment when you finally unlock the cage you hold him hostage in.” With those words, a tear trickled from my eye.

  Fuck.

  “The person you want is gone, Bree.” His face grew cold. “The further you push, the harder you dig, the more I couldn’t care less about being here. If you don’t want me for who I am, then you don’t need me at all.” I took a step back, shock coursing through me. Had he truly said those words? I watched him, waiting for his expression to change, for a flicker of guilt to show in his eyes. Instead, he stared at me for a long moment before turning around, grabbing his keys and leaving. I heard the roar of his engine come to life, but I still stood there, trapped in place by his words and my own emotions.

  All I wanted was him, the man I had fallen in love with.

  Throwing myself onto the couch, I allowed the tears to fall. Something had to give….

  He would come back to me, right? He had to.

  Chapter Four

  Zerro

  My fist landed against the brick wall, my knuckles cutting open as blood dripped from my hand. I wanted the pain to make the ache in my chest go away, but it didn’t. It just made it grow bigger and bigger.

  When I left the house, I did so because I couldn’t handle the words I had said, even more so I wondered if I truly meant them. I loved Bree with every fiber inside me, but I didn’t know if I would ever be able to bring back that person she wanted so badly. I wanted to be her everything, but I also wanted to be stable. Going back to my old ways could wreak havoc on my life. If anything, I was scared of the damage I could and would cause.

  I text Devon, telling him to meet me at one of the bars we always went to after doing surveillance. I needed someone to talk to, someone who would call me out on my shit without a second thought.

  When the roaring of his engine in his Tahoe met my ears, relief flooded me. It had been almost impossible to get him untangled from Tegan. If you ask me, I would say he was trying to plant his seed in her again.

  “Sorry I’m late, I had to…” He stopped midsentence, taking in my facial expression. He knew my feelings better than anyone, almost as good as Bree did.

  “I’m so fucked,” I admitted before bringing the beer to my lips and taking a long pull from it. I didn’t want to be that man, the one who constantly fucked up. I wanted to be the best dad I could be, and I wanted to be an even better husband.

  “How so? Like in a literal sense or in a ‘you just did something and feel like life is screwing you like a two cent hooker?’” A smile formed around my drink. Even if I didn’t want to, Devon always found a way to pull me from the mayhem going on in my head. Sometimes spending too much time in your own mind caused your problems to grow. Devon smiled at me as if he won some amazing prize by making me smile.

  “In an ‘I fucked up and said something I shouldn’t have to Bree, and now I’m not sure if it was the right thing.’ Hell, I’m not sure if it was even okay to say...” I sounded devastated, heartbroken. How could that be? I still had her.

  Devon tilted his head at me as if he was a little too amused for my liking. “You mean to tell me you finally fucked up and caused an argument?” His question seemed to piss me off more.

  “Whose side are you on?” I raised my eyebrow up at him.

  “Whoa, I haven’t even heard the issue yet. Let me get both sides before I go picking sides.” He put his hands out as if he were innocent.

  I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. A few years ago he was completely blind to doing what was right versus what was wrong. Sneaking around on unauthorized undercover jobs for a girl he never completely let go of and only to fuck it up a good two to three times before getting it right. Innocent my nine-inch cock.

  “Why do I feel like you don’t even care to hear my side of the story?” I took another swig of my beer, the effects of the alcohol not even setting in.

  “Honestly…” He smiled. “If Bree is pissed, you probably did something really fucking wrong.” My mouth gaped open. What was he trying to say?

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I accused.

  “It means you fucked up. In the literal sense. She basically broke every rule for you. You have been through tons of shit with her. Shit that normal women would’ve broken down from. I mean you killed people in front of her, she killed someone for you. I mean if she’s pissed about something after all of that, it’s probably serious.” I wanted to slam my beer down on the bar and punch Devon in the face all at the same.

  “And what about all the serious shit you had done to Teg? Was that inexcusable in a literal sense or was that you just fucking up?” I spit back at him, pissed the fuck off he’s right.

  “Calm down there, killer. This isn’t about me, fuckface. But since you brought it up... I had fucked up in every way possible, but at the end of the day, when push came to fucking shove, I was man enough to go crawling back to her on my own motherfucking knees. I didn’t get to have no pity-fucking-party. Therefore, take that princess crown off your head and start acting like a man!”

  “Fuck!” I shouted. The other bar patrons didn’t even bat an eyelash at me. The music from the jukebox was far too loud, that and they were used to a scuffle or two taking place in this bar.

  “Now, I must ask… what is it you did?” The look on Devon’s face made my stomach flip. I had seriously screwed up by saying what I had, and there was no other way to take back the words that were already said.

  I ran a hand through my hair, not even knowing where to start. I was exhausted, and so fucking disappointed in myself. How could I have behaved this way?

  “It started the day I got home. James came and picked up Gia, and Bree was acting strangely. I mean super fucking strange, and then she spilled the beans on what was bothering her.” I paused. “I was so fucking taken aback by her words that I allowed them to eat away at me the past twenty-four hours.” Anger was on the verge of splitting me in two. I was like a volcano ready to erupt at any point in time. There would be no warning or mercy to those in the way of my destruction.

  “Well, what was bothering her?” Of course, Devon asked the hardest question of them all.

  “She wants the king back.” My voice ached, as did my heart as I said the words. Her admission made me question everything that made us who we were. The solid foundation of our relationship now relied on me and one single choice.

  Devon’s eyes grew wide, filling with shock. “When you say king, do you mean the old you? The look-at-me-like-that-again-and-I’ll-remove-your-eyeball Alzerro?” A smidge of amusement lingered within me. There were times when I missed the old me, like when an asshole was running from th
e law, and I had to take the time out of my day to chase him down, but most of the time, he was just a memory. A reminder of the person I never wanted to be again.

  “Yes. The person who didn’t give two fucks about taking someone’s life. The person who would sit there and watch someone bleed out because it fed the monster inside of me. The dangerous man full of chaos. She wants that part of me back. She feels like we were whole when I was that person. I feel like I need to be focused on being a husband and father to Gia. I need to be driving a minivan and shit, not having a shootout with a rival family.” I was spilling my heart out to another man. I was pretty sure if I hadn’t turned into a pussy a long time ago, this moment right here solidified it.

  “Wow…” he stuttered. “Well…” He seemed to be at a loss for words.

  “Yeah, so now you know exactly how I reacted to it. I love her, and I feel like I can give her exactly what she wants without pushing my own boundaries… But she won’t stop.” I gripped at the edges of my short hair. “She won’t let it go. She pushes and pushes, and eventually, I’m going to fucking snap. Eventually, I’m going to do something I know I will regret.” I felt Devon’s hand land on my shoulder. He was trying to comfort me in the best way possible.

  “I wish I knew what to tell you, but only you know for sure what to do. If being the person you used to be makes your marriage whole, isn’t it worth it? Can’t you be a better man while still being the same asshole you used to be?” Devon’s tone caused me to want to lurch across the room and pound my fists against the brick wall again. I hated being wrong, I hated making the wrong choice, and I hated hurting my wife when I shouldn’t have.

  “I just don’t want to open up that darkness again. I can’t open the door a little bit and not expect the person I was before not to want to come out completely. I put him away for a reason. In this life, the one I currently live in, he has no place.”

  Devon stared at me intently before standing and staring directly into my eyes, “What you need isn’t anything you can find here. The most expensive drink you will ever need is sitting at home in your bed, waiting for you. You know what you should do. You’re afraid and it’s understandable. Just remember, everyone has a fear they have to push through.” He winked at me and took a step back and then walking away. Where did he think he was going?