by Morgana Best
The Halloween Truth Spell
Cozy Mystery
Morgana Best
The Halloween Truth Spell
(The Kitchen Witch, Book 15)
Copyright © 2020 by Morgana Best
All rights reserved.
ISBN 9781922420701
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The personal names have been invented by the author, and any likeness to the name of any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
This book may contain references to specific commercial products, process or service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, specific brand-name products and/or trade names of products, which are trademarks or registered trademarks and/or trade names, and these are property of their respective owners. Morgana Best or her associates, have no association with any specific commercial products, process, or service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, specific brand-name products and / or trade names of products.
Contents
Glossary
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Connect with Morgana
Next Book In This Series
Also by Morgana Best
About Morgana Best
Glossary
Some Australian spellings and expressions are entirely different from US spellings and expressions. Below are just a few examples. It would take an entire book to list all the differences.
The author has used Australian spelling in this series. Here are a few examples: Mum instead of the US spelling Mom, neighbour instead of the US spelling neighbor, realise instead of the US spelling realize. It is Ms, Mr and Mrs in Australia, not Ms., Mr. and Mrs.; defence not defense; judgement not judgment; cosy and not cozy; 1930s not 1930’s; offence not offense; centre not center; towards not toward; jewellery not jewelry; favour not favor; mould not mold; two storey house not two story house; practise (verb) not practice (verb); odour not odor; smelt not smelled; travelling not traveling; liquorice not licorice; cheque not check; leant not leaned; have concussion not have a concussion; anti clockwise not counterclockwise; go to hospital not go to the hospital; sceptic not skeptic; aluminium not aluminum; learnt not learned. We have fancy dress parties not costume parties. We don’t say gotten. We say car crash (or accident) not car wreck. We say a herb not an herb as we produce the ‘h.’
The above are just a few examples.
It’s not just different words; Aussies sometimes use different expressions in sentence structure. We might eat a curry not eat curry. We might say in the main street not on the main street. Someone might be going well instead of doing well. We might say without drawing breath not without drawing a breath.
These are just some of the differences.
Please note that these are not mistakes or typos, but correct, normal Aussie spelling, terms, and syntax.
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AUSTRALIAN SLANG AND TERMS
Benchtops - counter tops (kitchen)
Big Smoke - a city
Blighter - infuriating or good-for-nothing person
Blimey! - an expression of surprise
Bloke - a man (usually used in nice sense, “a good bloke”)
Blue (noun) - an argument (“to have a blue”)
Bluestone - copper sulphate (copper sulfate in US spelling)
Bluo - a blue laundry additive, an optical brightener
Boot (car) - trunk (car)
Bonnet (car) - hood (car)
Bore - a drilled water well
Budgie smugglers (variant: budgy smugglers) - named after the Aussie native bird, the budgerigar. A slang term for brief and tight-fitting men’s swimwear
Bugger! - as an expression of surprise, not a swear word
Bugger - as in “the poor bugger” - refers to an unfortunate person (not a swear word)
Bunging it on - faking something, pretending
Bush telegraph - the grapevine, the way news spreads by word of mouth in the country
Car park - parking lot
Cark it - die
Chooks - chickens
Come good - turn out okay
Copper, cop - police officer
Coot - silly or annoying person
Cream bun - a sweet bread roll with copious amounts of cream, plus jam (= jelly in US) in the centre
Crook - 1. “Go crook (on someone)” - to berate them. 2. (someone is) crook - (someone is) ill. 3. Crook (noun) - a criminal
Demister (in car) - defroster
Drongo - an idiot
Dunny - an outhouse, a toilet, often ramshackle
Fair crack of the whip - a request to be fair, reasonable, just
Flannelette (fabric) - cotton, wool, or synthetic fabric, one side of which has a soft finish.
Flat out like a lizard drinking water - very busy
Galah - an idiot
Garbage - trash
G’day - Hello
Give a lift (to someone) - give a ride (to someone)
Goosebumps - goose pimples
Gumboots - rubber boots, wellingtons
Knickers - women’s underwear
Laundry (referring to the room) - laundry room
Lamingtons - iconic Aussie cakes, square, sponge, chocolate-dipped, and coated with desiccated coconut. Some have a layer of cream and strawberry jam (= jelly in US) between the two halves.
Lift - elevator
Like a stunned mullet - very surprised
Mad as a cut snake - either insane or very angry
Mallee bull (as fit as, as mad as) - angry and/or fit, robust, super strong.
Miles - while Australians have kilometres these days, it is common to use expressions such as, “The road stretched for miles,” “It was miles away.”
Moleskins - woven heavy cotton fabric with suede-like finish, commonly used as working wear, or as town clothes
Mow (grass / lawn) - cut (grass / lawn)
Neenish tarts - Aussie tart. Pastry base. Filling is based on sweetened condensed milk mixture or mock cream. Some have layer of raspberry jam (jam = jelly in US). Topping is in two equal halves: icing (= frosting in US), usually chocolate on one side, and either lemon or pink or the other.
Pub - The pub at the south of a small town is often referred to as the ‘bottom pub’ and the pub at the north end of town, the ‘top pub.’ The size of a small town is often judged by the number of pubs - i.e. “It’s a three pub town.”
Red cattle dog - (variant: blue cattle dog usually known as a ‘blue dog’) - referring to the breed of Australian Cattle Dog. However, a ‘red dog’ is usually a red kelpie (another breed of dog)
Shoot through - leave
Shout (a drink) - to buy a drink for someone
Skull (a drink) - drink a whole drink without stopping
Stone the crows! - an expression of surprise
Takeaway (food) - Take Out (food)
Toilet - also
refers to the room if it is separate from the bathroom
Torch - flashlight
Tuck in (to food) - to eat food hungrily
Ute /Utility - pickup truck
Vegemite - Australian food spread, thick, dark brown
Wardrobe - closet
Windscreen - windshield
* * *
Indigenous References
Bush tucker - food that occurs in the Australian bush
Koori - the original inhabitants/traditional custodians of the land of Australia in the part of NSW in which this book is set. Murri are the people just to the north. White European culture often uses the term, Aboriginal people.
Chapter 1
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“I’m not wearing these, even if it is Halloween!” Alder yelled.
I bit back a giggle. “Come out and show me.”
“No. You’ll laugh.” Still, the bedroom door opened to reveal Alder in his boxers. Unfortunately for him, they were a Halloween gift from Camino. They were bright orange and sported a luminous green stalk.
I held my breath, and after an interval managed to say, “I think they’re meant to be a Halloween pumpkin.” My self-control finally gave out, and I collapsed onto the sofa, clutching my stomach and laughing hysterically.
Alder shot me a glare and disappeared, just as there was a knock on the door.
My mood changed abruptly. Every year, Marina Mercer came from Melbourne to my little town of Bayberry Creek to demand a Halloween spell from me. It all started decades ago, when Marina’s grandmother, Nama, did a favour for my grandmother, Thelma. An evil witch organised a spell to bind Thelma to the house and garden when she died—hence the house now ‘being’ my grandmother—and Nama arranged for my grandfather to be bound to the garden, to ensure my grandparents would be together in the afterlife.
In return, my grandmother promised that her descendants would always grant Nama’s descendants one spell each and every Halloween. After my aunt crossed over, the Halloween spell was left to me, and every year, I had narrowly escaped being murdered as a direct consequence of the spell.
I wondered what the spell would be this year. I was about to find out.
I opened the front door to find Marina Mercer standing next to a giant white blob. Camino had worn some strange onesies before, but I had always managed to identify them. This time, I was completely at a loss. I nodded to Marina and asked the blob, “What are you?”
“The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man,” Camino muttered, or at least that was my best guess, her words muffled as they were by the giant suit. “Didn’t the sailor cap give it away?”
“What’s that? Who?” I stood back to let them both inside. The delightful scent of the jasmine bushes by the front porch wafted in. I loved spring in Bayberry Creek.
Camino removed her onesie head. “Didn’t you see Ghostbusters? The original, I mean?”
“Years ago, when I was a kid.”
Camino waddled past me, muttering that the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man was in the latest Ghostbusters movie too. The cats, Willow and Hawthorn, took fright at the sight of her and ran from the room. I resisted the urge to do the same. She tut-tutted. “The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is famous. He walked through New York.”
Marina and I exchanged glances. “Marina, would you like some tea or coffee? Wine?”
Alder appeared in the doorway, thankfully fully clothed this time. “I’ll get it.” With a curt nod at Marina, he disappeared.
“Alder always makes me feel bad for asking you to do the Halloween spell for me,” Marina lamented.
“He doesn’t object to the spells themselves as such. It’s just that they always nearly get me killed,” I explained. “And speaking of killed…” I walked over to turn off the TV. The house at once turned it back on again. “Can you at least turn down the volume?”
The house complied.
“What’s the house watching now?” Marina asked me.
“Barry,” I told her. “It’s a TV show about an assassin who wants to be an actor.”
Marina nodded. “Alder called me and we had a little chat about the yearly Halloween spell.”
This was news to me, and I said so. “I had no idea.”
Marina continued to nod. “So this year, I thought I would be altruistic. I decided not to request a spell for myself. I’ve decided to request that this year’s Halloween spell will be for Camino.”
Camino was part way through climbing out of her onesie. “That’s very kind of you,” she said. “So that’s why you wanted my book of onesies?” Without waiting for a response, she turned to Alder who had returned at that moment with a tray of tea and coffee. “Alder, do you have any Tim Tams? No? Never mind, I have to leave now anyway. I have to go to the hospital to visit a friend.”
After she left, Marina said to Alder, “I want this year’s spell to grant Camino her heart’s desire for her onesies.”
I nodded. “I know Camino wants them to have a military application, and she’s also said she might want to open a little onesie shop.”
Marina flinched as Willow jumped into her lap and stuck his claws into her leg for balance. “That’s why I want the spell to be for Camino’s heart’s desires. Maybe her conscious mind doesn’t know what she really, truly wants.”
“I suppose so,” I said doubtfully, looking at Alder.
“I don’t like the sound of it.” His voice trailed away. “I have to go to the office now.” He kissed me thoroughly before leaving.
Marina clasped her hands. “Let’s do it before Camino gets back. It will be a lovely surprise.”
“What, you want me to do it now?” I said, shocked. “I’ve had no time to prepare. Hmm, a wish-granting spell.” I tapped my chin. “I suppose I should use Road Opener Oil and Fast Luck Oil. I’ll be right back.”
I wasn’t going to allow Marina to see my altar room, so I hurried in there and fetched oils, powders, a packet of coffee, and a pen and paper. I couldn’t find my Road Opener Oil—maybe I needed to order more—so I snatched up a bottle of Blockbuster Oil instead.
“Blockbuster Oil?” Marina asked when I dumped them all on the coffee table.
I nodded. “Yes, it will blow all circumstances out of the way, so there will be nothing to prevent Camino from gaining her heart’s desires for her onesies. Since I couldn’t find my Road Opener Oil, I grabbed the Blockbuster Oil and an orange candle. I hope I’m doing the right thing. Blockbuster spells can be dramatic.”
I took Camino’s book listing the onesies she had made. I wrote her name on the piece of paper and under it wrote, ‘Grant Camino her heart’s desire for her onesies.’ I wrote the same words on another piece of paper.
I picked up the orange candle and rubbed Blockbuster Oil into it, and then made seven holes in the top of the candle before pouring in a little Blockbuster Oil.
All the while, Marina looked over my shoulder. “What are you doing now?” she asked me.
“I’m going to put the candle on the book. I’m going to set one name paper between the book and the candle. Then I will read the other name paper aloud, and then burn that name paper.” Before Marina could say anything else, I read the words aloud. I lit the candle, and then held the paper between a pair of tweezers over the flame. The paper at once burst into flames.
I was about to remark that the candle burnt nicely and quickly, a propitious sign, when Marina threw the coffee powder into the flame.
I gasped. “Why did you do that?”
Her face fell. “I was only trying to help,” she said. “You brought out the coffee powder, so I thought you were going to use it.”
I grimace
d. “That will make the spell far more powerful, too powerful maybe. I fetched the coffee powder before I realized I was out of Road Opener Oil. This is a Blockbuster spell, and the coffee might make things worse. Blockbuster spells are really over the top as it is.”
Marina’s hands flew to her throat. “Oh no!”
I hurried to reassure her. “It’s no big deal, really. Don’t worry about it. I’m sure everything will be fine. Forget what I said.” I smiled widely, doing my best to be optimistic.
Marina backed away, her hands still at her throat. I thought it rather an overreaction.
That was, until I turned around.
I screamed. Walking towards me was the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
Marina and I clutched each other and cowered in a corner near the fireplace as the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man advanced towards us.
Chapter 2
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I had decided to wear shoes. This was not breaking news, as I wore shoes every day, the way normal human beings do. No, I had decided to wear very, very tall heels, the kind that have a woman wavering on the knife’s edge of grievous bodily harm.