by M. D. Massey
Without warning, he pushed me onto my back and rolled on top of me. He pressed his lower body against mine, letting me know what he wanted, knowing I could no longer resist his advances.
I reached down and helped him out of his pants, then he helped me out of mine. He pushed my legs apart and settled between them, our kisses strong and hungry. He balanced himself on his right elbow, interlacing the fingers of his left hand with mine. In one thrust, he was in me.
I fought valiantly to stay quiet. I pressed my face into his chest, hoping my voice and heavy breathing would be muffled. Henry buried his face at the crook of my neck and into the pillow. We rocked each other to ecstasy. It took every ounce of strength from both of us not to cry out as we came together.
Emotionally spent, I cried immediately after. He lifted himself off me, a stunned look on his face. “Are you all right? Did I hurt you?” I held my hands over my face, trying to hide the tears streaming down the sides of my cheeks, settling into my ears. “Love, please… Talk to me.”
Frantically, he forced my hands off of my face, then pulled me close and held me. He comforted me as best as he could, without knowing why I was such a goddamn mess.
“Love, tell me what’s wrong. You’re worrying me,” he pleaded.
My words didn’t come out with ease. Every single one of them broke through my sobs. “I’m just so tired. Tired of it all. Tired of worrying about you; worrying if we will get to where we need to go; worried what’ll happen when we get there; worried about us, about everyone…” Henry tightened his arms around me. “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t. I worry so much about you. There’s only Thomas and I to supply you and Nick now. Food is slim, safe housing is limited…”
Henry pulled back, resting his forehead against mine. “I’m so sorry. I want to make you happy, and I will not stop until that happens. I know I’ve been weak lately, but I promise to provide more strength for you to lean on.” He brushed my long, tear-dampened hair away from my face, drawing me into his gaze. “I’ll start training Nick and Thomas, if Addie will allow it. I understand your fears and I want to give you some reassurance.” He kissed my cheek.
Of course, someone had to knock on the door during one of my weaker moments. Panic ran through me. I didn’t want anyone to know I was crying my eyes out, or find out we were naked. I tried to make my voice steady.
“Hold on. I’m helping Henry put his shirt back on.” There were a lot of quick hand motions between us, pointing at our clothes and one another. I hate charades.
Claire shouted through the door. “I just wanted to tell you Addie wants everyone outside so we can tend to the garden and figure out a meal.”
“All right. We’ll be right there. I just need to help him.” Henry blotted my face with the water and rag that Addie used to wipe down his broken hand. We both dressed.
“It’s going to be okay.” I nodded as he pulled me into yet another one of his healing embraces. “Come on, my black-haired beauty.”
“Addie said we can stay as long as we need to.” Henry smiled, nodding, then he took my hand and we walked out together.
As Henry and I made our way out to the others, he held me firmly against his side, doing just as he said he would. Holding me up with his strength.
Everyone stood around in the garden. When we finally arrived to the outer edges of Addie’s massive garden, he eased his body away from mine, making it look as if I were assisting him. He knew exactly what I needed. That’s why I loved him so much.
“Mr. Henry!” Julianna rushed to him. She clutched Henry around his waist. “You’re okay!” Henry squatted to his newfound admirer. He grinned at her, taken in by the affection Julianna showed him.
“Hello, beautiful princess. I’m doing much better. Thank you.”
“Mr. Henry, I pulled a sweet potato out of Ms. Addie’s garden for you.”
“Wow! That’s brilliant. Thank you. Is it all right if I share with the others?”
“Yes, of course!” Julianna skipped away from us.
Henry stood, smiling at me. “She’s a doll.”
“You’re going to be an amazing father someday.”
“How are you feeling?” Nick asked Claire as he sat next to her on the threadbare couch in Addie’s living room. She was relaxing after eating a decent meal for a change.
“I’m fine. I’m just really tired, physically and mentally.” Nick embraced Claire. She pulled away. “Can you play me a song?” Nick looked at his guitar propped up against the wall near the door.
“Of course. Anything for you.” He walked over and picked it up, then returned to the couch, sitting on the edge. He ran through a few chords, tuning it. That alone drew a crowd. All the kids peeked out of the kitchen, but Nick was clueless. When he began playing, he went into the zone…the same one Claire saw him in the first time she heard him play.
Run by Matt Nathanson passionately poured out of him as he delivered the piece with finesse. Again, she was drawn to him like a moth to a flame, her heart skipping a beat.
When Nick finished, there was an eruption of applause from the small crowd.
“I had no idea he could play like that,” Henry said into my ear.
“Yeah, he’s a natural. He had a lot of lessons when he was young, but he grew bored and decided to continue on his own.” I felt like I was bragging about my own child. Singing and playing guitar was one thing Nick had always done well.
Nick stood and bowed. “Thank you. Thank you. I’ll be here all night, taking requests.” Everyone laughed.
We all sat in the candlelit room as Nick continued to play. It was one of those very few moments we could forget about everything happening outside that front door and enjoy a blissful moment.
Chapter 38
Several weeks went by. We had attempted to leave, but Addie insisted we stay a little longer, concerned about our welfare. It was nice to have someone who wanted to watch over us, instead of kill us. Also, I think she enjoyed our company.
It was growing more difficult to perform draws in the packed house without being noticed. There was always someone wandering around somewhere. We used to do it in the truck, but it was difficult getting out there alone.
It was the crack of dawn when I felt Henry running his icy fingers up and down my arm, which made me shiver.
“Hey, love,” he whispered in my ear. I cracked open my eyes, and there he was, his nose touching mine while we snuggled on the floor. I smiled at him, even though his breath smelled like booze. It wasn’t the first time I noticed his boozy morning breath, and I was quite certain that it wouldn’t be the last. “You want to go watch the sunrise with me?”
“Yeah.”
We quietly got up and snuck out the front door, blanket in tow, trying not to disturb Thomas and Shay, who were also sleeping in the living room.
Through the frosty grass, Henry and I trudged out to the barn. We climbed up the rickety ladder and opened the upper doors. We snuggled up, the blanket wrapped around both of us, enjoying the view of the sun beginning to peek through the trees. I felt him staring at me.
“What?” I said without looking at him.
“I’m admiring your beauty.”
I laughed. “Maybe you should be admiring the beauty of the sunrise. There may be a day when we won’t get to see it.”
He stroked my tangled locks. “And there may be a day when I don’t get to admire your lovely face.” He pulled me closer. “I’m thinking we should take off in the next day or so.”
I had to admit I was enjoying the home life dynamic. Even though it was cramped and we had to sleep on the floor, it felt so good. Also, I was glad to avoid Gunther for as long as possible.
“I want to make a run for supplies and gas today.” Then he added, “Plus, we need a bag.” He sounded ashamed.
Worry swept over me. “Henry… I don’t want to go find Gunther. I mean, what good would it do? You’re just going to kill him, but then what?”
“I’ll have the upper hand.”
“What happened to saving the world? All that positive talk from you?”
I sighed. “I don’t know.”
“Killing Gunther means I’ll take out another one of Roger’s main men. We already got rid of Kellan. If we get rid of Gunther, I’ll be able to show Roger I’m not fucking around with this, that I mean business. He has to be freaking out seeing that Kellan’s tracking device isn’t signaling to the satellite anymore, mine and Sophie’s stagnant for ages.” My sweet Henry spoke like he was a killing machine.
“How will he find out? It’s not like there is any way to communicate with him.”
“He’ll find out at some point, and when he does, it will be a kick in the bollocks to his program.”
“Please excuse my stupidity, but I don’t understand how it will hurt Roger.”
Henry was becoming flustered, the muscle in his jaw twitching. “Look, with Kellan gone and when I get rid of Gunther, I’ll only have one more person to go through to get to Roger.”
“But what about the other recruits? Will they all side with you?”
“Probably not, but it’s not anything I can’t handle. Trust me. I have it all worked out up here.” He pointed at his head.
I didn’t have anything else to say. My worry would have just taken over completely and we would have gotten into an argument. I didn’t want that, so I looked back out at the sunrise and took it all in.
“I’ve been thinking. I want to rise up like you encouraged me to do. Get people together. Rally up. Maybe we could form a new society.”
I whipped my head around at him. “Are you out of your fucking mind?!” I snapped. “You do understand that you would be killed if they found out your life status, right?”
“But if I can prove that we won’t harm them, that Nick and I will continue drinking only donated blood, maybe I stand a chance. Maybe I can live freely with what I am and not hide anymore. I’m sick of living in secrecy, sick of worrying about what the reaction will be if someone finds out.”
“Finds out what?”
Henry and I both jumped up, our Sigs drawn. “Julianna! You cannot sneak up on people like that,” Henry scolded her. “And eavesdropping on other people’s conversations is terribly rude!”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Henry.” She looked deflated, her shoulders sagging.
I kneeled. “Does anyone know you’re out here?”
“No,” she murmured.
“You shouldn’t wander around outdoors alone.” Henry quirked his brow at her. Her eyes filled with tears.
“We need to get you back inside before someone freaks out.” I grabbed her hand as Henry went down the ladder first.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Elaina.” Julianna descended the ladder. I followed and took her hand again. “What did Mr. Henry mean when he said ‘living in secrecy’?”
I stopped abruptly, and Julianna almost fell over. “I don’t want you repeating anything you heard! You have misunderstood what Mr. Henry was saying.” I was as angry as he was, but I tried not to scare her, although I think that I did, judging by her watery eyes.
Henry grabbed my arm. “I’ve got this.” I nodded and let go of her hand. Henry knelt and looked in her eyes. “Julianna, listen, there are some things that are not to be heard by children. To be honest, Ms. Elaina and I were speaking of troubles in our relationship. It’s hard to understand, and it’s been hard on us. We hope to work out all of our problems before we are to marry.” Henry smiled tenderly. “So I would greatly appreciate it if you wouldn’t say anything. I don’t want anyone to worry about us. Okay, little love?”
“Okay,” she replied shyly.
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
“Pinky swear?” Henry held out his pinky. Julianna examined it momentarily, then hooked her delicate pinky finger around his, smiling. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he stood, carrying her toward the door.
Then she said, “I wish you were my daddy.” Henry was taken aback, as was I. My heart skipped, feeling guilty for scolding her. “You’re nice, like my first daddy was.”
“Now that is very sweet.” Henry tapped her on the nose with his index finger. Julianna giggled. Henry set her down and took her little hand in his, then they walked back inside the house. It was the sweetest thing I had seen in a long time.
Rosa met us at the door, looking completely frazzled. “There you are!” she shouted. “I was worried sick!”
Shay and Thomas, who were still sleeping, woke with a start.
“I’m sorry, Rosa.” Julianna hung her head in shame.
“You cannot go outside by yourself! It’s too dangerous! Thankfully, Mr. Henry and Ms. Elaina were there to bring you back.”
“Take it easy on her. She was just being curious,” Henry said.
“Take it easy on her? Have you ever heard the phrase ‘curiosity killed the cat’? Do you have any idea what I did to save this child? Any idea?”
“That is enough, Rosa. You do not disrespect adults,” Addie sharply added as she walked out from her bedroom. “I’m sure Henry and his group have gone through a lot to stay alive and save others.” Check and mate, Rosa.
Henry, trying to control his temper, whispered, “Just so you know, not that it’s any of your concern, I had to put a bullet in my best friend’s head. I had to kill members of our families, and also children and teens, much like yourself. Did you forget what we did to rescue you?”
“We held down the fort at the school. Did you notice the stairs, or did you forget that?” Rosa retorted.
“I did notice, and I do believe I commended you and your group’s bravery and brilliance of the situation, did I not? But if we didn’t get in there, you guys would have ended up starving to death.”
I tugged on Henry’s arm. “Come on. Let’s get you a bite to eat. Sorry. He tends to get grumpy when he’s hungry.” As I pushed him toward the kitchen, I heard Addie scolding Rosa. Words like “ungrateful”, “arrogant”, and “apology” were used several times between the two of them.
I directed Henry to a chair at the table. I started chopping up fresh veggies and putting them in a large bowl. It was a minute or two before I could bring myself to say anything.
In a harsh whisper, I said, “Henry, you have to control yourself.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m in need,” he mumbled, sounding truly sorry for his outburst.
“You can’t keep using that as an excuse. She’s just a child, much like Julianna.” It felt odd saying that since I wasn’t that much older than Rosa, although I did feel many years wiser. Life experience speaks for itself.
“I know. I’ll apologize.”
“Just eat something, then we’ll take care of your other issue later.”
I placed the bowl in front of him as Addie brought Rosa into the kitchen. Rosa scowled as she leaned against the counter, her arms crossed, while Henry quietly ate. I continued chopping until there was enough for everyone. Addie took the seat next to Henry.
“I think I’m going to go hunting for supplies and gas today.” Henry didn’t even look up as he talked. “We’ll be leaving in the next day or so.”
“Now, if you are leaving on account of my daughter’s behavior, please reconsider.”
I laughed. Addie raised her eyebrow. “I’m sorry, Addie, but if I can’t change his mind, no one can.”
“I understand that, but I don’t want your group to be put at risk because of something she said.”
“I’m in the same room, Mom,” Rosa growled.
“Look. I don’t want any fighting. This is what I’m doing. I’m going to have a private meeting with my group at the truck in a few minutes, then our plans will be finalized.”
“I wish you would stay. My main concern is Claire and the baby. What if something happens and you don’t have a place for her to rest comfortably?”
“Addie, there are things I have to do. I’m
sorry. I greatly appreciate all you have done for us.” He took her hand. “You’re amazing, and will forever be in my heart.”
Shortly after we all ate, Henry gathered our group and we went out to the truck. He drew a bag each from Thomas and me while we chatted and discussed our plans. Nick and Henry drank, then we headed back inside to relay our plans to Addie.
“Nick, Thomas, and I will go out to hunt for gas and supplies. Can you give me a location close by?” Henry leaned on his elbows on the table.
After a full bag, he always felt pretty high. I worried Addie would suspect something. Nick was having trouble keeping his euphoria at bay, as well. Claire stroked his cheek, trying to make it look like he was giddy over her.
“I would like to go.”
I turned around, seeing Justin standing at the doorway.
“You will not!” Rosa bit out.
“Why not? I held my own when we left the school. And I could be an asset. I know my way around here.”
Henry nodded, agreeing with Justin. It did make sense, but I was leery.
“I won’t let you go with them!”
“Are you being for real, Rosa? I didn’t realize you were my mom.”
Oops. I had a feeling it was going to get nasty. I wished we had electricity so I could pop a bag of popcorn for the show that was about to begin.
“Maybe we should get out of the line of fire,” I whispered to Addie.
“I think you may be right. Let them duke it out.” Addie had a smirk on her face.
I grabbed Henry’s arm. “Come on. Let’s go out in the living room and give them a little privacy.” Claire and Nick followed behind us. When we rounded the corner, we saw Thomas and Shay kissing on the couch.
“Well, maybe we should go outside,” Henry said, nudging my shoulder. Addie laughed. Thomas and Shay pulled apart.
Henry directed me straight through the front door and down the porch stairs. He held my arm and guided me into the barn. I climbed the ladder, and he followed. I had a feeling what was going to happen.