by Lux Zakari
* * * *
“Breezy!” Lisa Melane wove between the sweaty, swaying couples dancing to an Eagles song to meet her blond friend, who sat alone at a table beneath a canopy of twisted streamers and a banner reading Kenton College presents Nights in White Satin. “Why are you sitting over here all by yourself?”
“I needed a break.” Breeze fanned her hot face with her souvenir gala booklet, which she’d folded into an accordion shape. “I’ve been on my feet all night.”
“Me too.” Lisa sank down in a nearby folding chair and surveyed their surroundings with a pleased smile. “Isn’t this great?”
Breeze glanced around the dark crowded ballroom and took a drink from her paper cup, leaving faint marks of red on the clear plastic. “Yeah, I’ve seen worse.”
“I’ll say.” Lisa’s attention turned to Breeze. “I still can’t believe how beautiful you look.”
“Don’t sound so surprised.” Breeze stood and twirled, letting Lisa view her red halter dress from all angles.
“Mike probably wanted to tear that dress off you when he picked you up tonight.”
“He doesn’t care what I wear.” Breeze sat again. “Just as long as he can undress me with his eyes.”
Lisa winked. “At any rate, he’s a lucky guy.”
“I don’t know how lucky he’ll be.” Breeze plucked a few petals from the flowered centerpiece. “We’re just trying things out.”
“Oh, please.” Lisa rolled her eyes.
“I swear.” Breeze crossed her fingers on her right hand and held them up. “We haven’t done anything like that so far.”
“What does ‘so far’ mean? Is tonight the night?” Lisa bounced her eyebrows.
“The night will be whenever he finally proves himself to me.” Breeze crunched her cup in her hand and leaned over the back of her chair to toss it in the closest trashcan. “If he wants me, he needs to work for it. He needs to be a man for once in his life.”
“Okay, this is all none of my business, so naturally I’m interested.” Lisa leaned forward in her seat. “What does a young man have to do to melt the ice around Kim Breza’s heart?”
“There’s no manual or anything.” Breeze waved her hand. “And if a boy even has to ask, he’ll never know.”
“Do you think he’s going to know it before you take off to New York as soon as you can?”
Breeze shrugged. “I hope so. But that doesn’t matter, because I invited him to go with me.”
Lisa arched an eyebrow. “You asked your sort-of boyfriend to move a thousand miles away with you and you don’t even know if you two will last?”
“I never said I don’t think we’ll last,” Breeze huffed. “Michael and I have been through a lot together.”
“I agree. It can be hard to say goodbye. No wonder you want to take him with you.”
Breeze crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the floor. “If you’re suggesting the only reason I asked Michael to go to New York with me is because it’s easier to be with him than without him, you’re wrong.”
Lisa shrugged. “In any case, how convenient for you he’ll be free to go with you. You’ll be graduating, and he’ll be flunking out.”
Breeze gritted her teeth. “I don’t know how you know that but just shut up, okay? Michael’s coming over.” She straightened in her seat and gave Michael a tight smile as he approached, wearing a rumpled brown suit and a half-untucked peach shirt. His hair stuck out all over his head, as if he’d just woken after being asleep for days. “Hey, you.”
“Hey.” He spun an empty chair around and straddled it backward.
“How’s it goin’, Mike?” Lisa asked.
“All right.” He shrugged. “After all, I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be than in a suffocating room with about two hundred jerks who’ve nothing better to do than dress up and wiggle to Rock Me Gently.”
“Baby, please.” Breeze sighed. “Don’t be such a bore.”
Michael kept his eyes on Lisa. “Did I also mention it’s been a blast watching Breeze hike up her skirt and rub her vagina on just about every guy here?”
“You’ve just been standing by the punch and pouting,” Breeze said. “I have to dance with somebody.”
“You call what you were doing dancing? Maybe you should charge.” Michael attempted to peer down the front of Breeze’s dress. “Is that a dollar I see? You upped your rate.”
Breeze let out a tinkling laugh that sounded like icicles cracking as she gripped Michael’s upper arm, her fingernails digging into his suit jacket like talons. “Oh, baby, you’re a real riot. And if you make this night miserable for me, I swear I won’t let you forget it.”
“Right, let’s not ruin this momentous rite of passage.”
“Breezy was just telling me how you guys are planning on going to New York.” Lisa’s gaze flitted between the couple, and Breeze shot her a warning look.
The expression on Michael’s face grew darker. “I haven’t decided for sure yet.” His glare focused on Breeze. “Counting on my failure?”
“Now, now.” Breeze patted Michael’s knee in a way that was more violent than affectionate. “I can’t help it that you keep your options open, hoping something better comes along.”
Michael groaned as he blew the hair out of his eyes. “That’s not the case, and you know it.”
“Please, I don’t feel like having a fight tonight.”
“I think you do. Too bad for you I’m not going to give you one.”
Before Breeze could respond, Rooney staggered over and bent to wrap his arms around her shoulders. “Hey guys,” he shouted above the music. “Am I interrupting another lovers’ spat?”
Breeze rubbed the forearm of Rooney’s jacket. “Why, do we look like we’re fighting?”
“You look normal. So yes.” Rooney raised his eyebrows at Michael. “What do you say, man? Do you care if I have another dance with your girl here?”
Michael ran a hand through his messy hair. “What happened to your date?”
“Mary Anne’s still in the bathroom with her head in the can.” With one arm still looped around Breeze, Rooney pulled a small flask out of his jacket pocket and gave it a shake. “She couldn’t handle her whiskey, I guess.”
“Shouldn’t you be holding her hair back or something like a good date?” Lisa crossed her legs and shook her head, admonishing.
Rooney shrugged. “I guess. But all the alternatives are much more fun.” He looked at Michael as he pressed his flushed cheek against Breeze’s. “So? Can I borrow her for a bit?”
“Don’t ask him.” Breeze stood with ease despite Rooney’s arm still circling her shoulder. “He doesn’t care. And he’s being a snooze anyway.”
“Yeah, it’s cool.” Michael got to his feet. “I’m going out for a smoke.”
“Yes, go outside and be miserable.” Breeze wrapped her arms around Rooney’s waist and looked at him with a flirtatious smile. “So anything left in that flask?”
“Maybe.” Rooney arched an eyebrow. “Why do you ask?”
“Because you smell like you drank it all. I wanted to know if there was still a drop or two for a cute blonde.”
Rooney passed Breeze the flask. “I’ve always got something for a cute blonde.”
“That’s what I like to hear.” Breeze turned into Rooney’s shoulder and discreetly took a swig from the flask.
Michael rolled his eyes. “Don’t forget.” He leaned in close to Breeze and let his lips brush against hers as he pulled a cigarette out of his suit’s breast pocket. “I’m watching you.”
“Isn’t everyone?” She smirked as she wiped her mouth delicately with her fingertips then straightened his tie, one hand still wrapped around the flask. “Now go on. Enjoy yourself.”
“I intend to.”
* * * *
“Are you having a good time?” Daniel shouted to Valerie over Pilot’s Magic as he spun her around on the dance floor.
“Yes!” To her surprise, it was the
truth. Although her stomach had been in knots when they first arrived, her unease drifted away as the evening wore on. They had sat with Daniel’s friends and their dates during dinner, and everyone had been so entertaining and in such good spirits Valerie couldn’t help but finally get excited. For the first time in her life, she really believed she was an adult, dressed up and surrounded by interesting people. She felt beautiful and life seemed so promising. It was as if everything her aunt had once guaranteed her had finally unfolded before her.
“I’m glad.” Daniel stretched out his arm, twirling her before pulling her toward him again. “You seem a lot happier than you did earlier.”
Valerie could feel his body heat radiating from beneath his suit, and his hands were warm on her back. She blushed from the nearness of him. “I know. I’m sorry about that. But I’m having a good time now.”
The unguarded grin appearing on Daniel’s face made Valerie smile. She was amazed at being liked by a boy. It was wonderful. She couldn’t even begin to count the times she’d wished Michael Vartanian would look at her that same way. There had been moments anger nearly paralyzed her when she’d realized he never would, and how much she’d given to him anyway.
Now, she shook those thoughts from her head. She’d been enjoying the unfamiliar, refreshing sensation of thinking of something—and someone—else aside from Michael Vartanian. She hadn’t seen him all evening, and there was no way or reason she was going to let him ruin the night for her.
“So what’s on the agenda once the gala’s over?” she called to him over the music.
“Ed’s throwing a party,” Daniel said, speaking of one of his friends Valerie had met during dinner. “I’m sure some of the gang is already at his place by now. If you want to, we can head out soon and go there.”
“I want to.”
He smiled again, and Valerie experienced the desire she’d felt for him in the men’s bathroom in Rightmer. Why hadn’t she thought to return his feelings for her long ago? Not only could she have saved herself a lot of heartache, but she suspected she could’ve actually been happy.
The song came to a close, and Valerie fanned her flushed face with her hand. “Do you mind if we sit the next one out? I’m burning up.”
“Sure. I’ll get us some drinks.”
“Sounds perfect.”
Daniel left her in search of the refreshment table, and Valerie surveyed her peers. Although she didn’t know most of them personally, she still experienced a warm sentiment inside her as she watched everyone dancing, smiling and having fun. It was a feeling a lot like hope.
Her eyes rested on a familiar face, and she drew in a deep breath. She counted to ten, trying to muster enough courage to do what she’d wanted to do all night. Logic warred with her fear, insisting she had nothing to lose by saying what she needed to say.
Finally, she crossed the dance floor to where a couple stood at one of the tables, gathering their things. “I just wanted to say you both look really amazing tonight.”
Shannon whirled around and her eyes widened. “Thanks.” Her surprised expression turned into one of wistful relief. “I can’t believe how pretty you look. I told Rick that earlier when I saw you dancing, right?” She looked to her boyfriend, who nodded in response, then turned back to Valerie. “So you’re here with Daniel?”
“I am.” Valerie gave a proud, happy smile. “We’re having a great time. How about you two?”
“This is better than the gala we had at Rockhurst,” Rick said with a dry smile.
“That’s because I was on the Student Activities Council this year and pushed for perfection.” Shannon gave her hairstyle—a long braid with flowers woven into it—a mock-arrogant pat. “How could anyone say no to anything I want to do?”
Rick smirked. “I know the answer to that one better than anyone.”
Valerie giggled. “You guys aren’t leaving, are you?” She gestured between Shannon, who held her purse, and Rick, who carried their souvenir booklets.
“Yeah, we’re heading out.” Shannon tittered. “We thought a drive might be fun.”
Valerie rolled her eyes, a smile playing on her lips, and Rick gave Shannon a one-handed shoulder rub. “Nice going, Shan.” He shook his head, his expression exasperated but affectionate. “I always appreciated and admired your subtlety.”
“Well, if you guys get tired of ‘driving,’ Daniel’s friend Ed is throwing a party afterward,” Valerie said. “You should come.”
“I never get tired of driving.” Shannon laughed. “But yeah, that sounds fun. Maybe we’ll swing by.”
“Okay.” Valerie feared a giddy shriek would suddenly explode out of her. “I really hope to see you there.”
“Me too.” Shannon captured Valerie’s hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. “It was good talking to you.”
“I know.” Valerie felt like she’d start crying, she was so happy. “Let’s do it more often.”
* * * *
Michael stepped outside Farley Student Union, where the gala was being held in the ballroom, and took a huge gulp of air, an act that instantly soothed him. A brief rainstorm had passed, but the air was still cool and the night sky cloudy, partially hiding the moon.
He dodged a few stray puddles on the cracked sidewalk as he stepped into the comforts of the shadows and reached in his pocket for his lighter. All the while he cursed Breeze for conning him into coming to the gala. He wasn’t even sure why he’d agreed. He highly doubted sex was in the works for him that night, considering the way she’d been acting lately. Some days she would entwine her pinky finger with his like she used to do when they were officially dating, some days she would insist they were only friends and some days she even had the gall to tell him in detail about other people she had been seeing during the past few months.
He shook his head as he cupped his hand around his cigarette and lit it, wondering why he even bothered with Breeze. All she seemed to do anymore was infuriate him. When she wasn’t infuriating him, she was intriguing him, which only further annoyed him.
Michael leaned against the building and took a drag as he assessed the scene in front of him. Student cars packed the parking lot, and he smirked as he saw one couple tumble in the backseat of a Ford Mustang and immediately fog the windows. Bats swooped overhead and rode the evening air, capturing bugs out of the sky. Faint strains of an Aerosmith song floated from inside the student union building, where he assumed Breeze had found another guy to ensnare with her charms. He shook his head at the thought and raised the cigarette to his mouth again.
The front door swung open and Valerie and a tall boy stepped outside, their arms linked and their faces flushed. A few curled strands escaped Valerie’s upswept hairstyle, and she wore a flimsy shawl over her pale blue floor-length dress. The smile on her face made her look absolutely radiant. Michael thought she’d never looked prettier.
He ducked farther into the darkness before he could be detected just as the boy turned to Valerie. “I’ll go get the car and meet you here, okay?” He shook his head and looked at his feet, smiling. “I know I’ve said this about a million times tonight, but you really do look incredibly beautiful.”
“Come on.” She gave his arm a playful squeeze, the look on her face one of pure joy. “Quit being a goof and just go get the car.”
“You got it. Your chariot awaits, m’lady!” The boy scampered off across the parking lot, disappearing into the night.
Michael rolled the cigarette between his fingertips, wondering whether to approach her. More than likely, she was bound to be unpleasant, considering they hadn’t spoken since their afternoon behind Rightmer Hall two weeks ago. After so many months of her having been everywhere, staring at him with a devastated expression, she’d suddenly vanished, as if she’d gone out of her way to avoid him. He supposed that him following Breeze around like a golden retriever hadn’t helped the situation.
He groaned inwardly and pinched the bridge of his nose, sick to death of thinking about Breeze. There was
no one he’d rather think of less. He studied Valerie again. She stood patiently in front of the building, looking ethereal beneath the outdoor lamps as she clutched her shawl around her shoulders and stared across the parking lot. Before he could make sense of his motives, his feet made up his mind for him and led him toward her.
Michael touched her gently on the back of her arm, and she spun around. “Having fun?”
Her eyes narrowed as she took a step back. “Go away.”
“I’ll do what I want, thanks.” He took a puff on his cigarette. “It’s a free country, after all.”
Her shoulders stiffened, full of fight. “What do you want?”
“I think it’s pretty clear.” He rolled the cigarette’s filter between his fingers.
Valerie snorted. “Yeah, it always is.”
“Come on.” He stroked her shoulder with his index finger. “Why are you being like this?”
She let out a humorless laugh as she recoiled from his touch and stared at the sky. “Why are you?”
“I’m not being like anything. I’m just trying to have a conversation.”
“Well, I don’t want to have a conversation with you.” She crossed her arms over her chest and looked away, pressing her lips together as if she had more to say but refused to let the words out. He admired the naked nape of her neck and fought the urge to defile it with his mouth.
“You know, I know I’ve said this about a million times tonight, but you really do look incredibly beautiful.” He spoke without understanding why he felt the need to say anything at all, why her refusal of him was too shocking to believe.
She whipped her head toward him, her mouth parted with surprise. Her eyes hardened. “Eavesdrop much?”
“Yep, so now out with it. Who’s the dork?”
“I’m with my friend Daniel, whom you’ve met about a zillion times by now.”
“Oh, right. Daniel.” Michael flicked his cigarette across the parking lot. It sparked as it hit the pavement. “So is tonight the big night? Are you gonna finally make the poor bastard’s dreams come true and fuck him?”