Back in the living room, Jacks was sitting on the floor in front of the TV watching some cartoon. I watched him in fascination, feeling as if I was looking at what my life would have been with different choices. He said he was nine, meaning there'd only been very little time between me leaving and him being conceived.
That could have been us.
As soon as I thought it, I knew it wouldn't have been right. I needed the army as much as I suspected Callie had needed Jackson. They both gave us something to believe in.
We should have been able to believe in each other.
But we hadn't. Not really. We were just a couple of scared kids figuring out that life outside the bubble of our small town was a lot bigger than we'd imagined.
I gently touched the back of Jackson's head as Callie came out.
“I should go,” I said, wanting nothing more than to stay there with her, but I needed a bit of space. This wasn't my family. As right as it felt today, the boys weren't mine. They had a father. I had to remember that.
“Okay.” She looked down for a moment in disappointment. When she raised her chin, the girl I knew so well had returned. The strength in her eyes had only grown over the years. I imagined it had to. She wasn't only being strong for herself anymore.
I hesitated at the door for a moment, smiling slightly before stepping out.
Inside my truck, I rubbed a hand over my face.
My cell vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out, grinning at the name that appeared.
“Barrette.”
“Daniels, my good man.”
“Give me some news from base, I beg of you. I'm dying being away from the guys.”
He laughed. “Franks kicked Manner out of the barracks last night. Made him sleep under the stars and we all got a much-needed respite from his chainsaw snores.”
Laughing like that felt good. I missed my team. The fact that they weren't exactly my team anymore would take a while to set in. “I shoulda thought of that. Can't tell you how many times I came close to suffocating the bastard with his own pillow.”
“So, Carlson tells us you're out.”
“Yep, told me that too.”
“Discharge?”
“Nah, I hadn't re-upped yet. They're calling it retirement, but really it's them telling me I'm not good enough to watch your asses anymore.”
“Something wrong with your eyes?”
Leave it to Barrette to make a joke out of the end of my career.
“Ha-ha asshole.”
“You good?”
I knew what he was asking, but didn't know how to answer that. Did I tell him that I had no clue what happened next and that scared the shit out of me? Or that things here were screwed up and it was completely my fault? My brother. My best friend. At least Callie was speaking to me.
No, I told him what he wanted to hear.
“Yeah, bro. All good here.”
“Good, good. Listen, I just wanted to check up on you.”
“Aw,” I laughed. “I'm touched.”
“We're heading out at 0800 tomorrow for parts unknown.” Known to them, unknown to us suckers that were left here. “It'll be a long one. They're saying six months, but you know how these things go.”
I did. Six months could mean two or it could mean ten. They wouldn't know the true situation until they were well into their mission.
“Good luck, man,” I said. “Come back in one piece.”
“I'll do my best. Don't fall off the face of the earth, Jamie. We're brothers whether you wear the uniform or not. If you disappear, I'll never forgive you.”
“You got it.”
We hung up and I pulled out of Callie's driveway.
We're brothers. If you disappear, I'll never forgive you.
That was exactly what I'd done.
Jay wasn't ready to hear anything I had to say, but there was someone who might be. I texted Callie for her brother's address and she responded quickly.
It was only a few minutes away. I scanned the parking lot of the apartment building, but then realized I was looking for Colby's old car. I had no idea what he drove now.
His place was on the third floor of the modern building. I raised my hand to knock, hesitating for just a second before rapping my knuckles against the solid wood.
No one came. I knocked again and was about to turn back when the door opened, revealing a tired looking Colby in navy blue hospital scrubs. His glasses were pushed up into his hair and he rubbed a hand against his eyes.
“Jamie,” he said, slightly surprised.
“Uh, hey. If this is a bad time …”
He looked back into his place, making a decision. “No, it's fine. Come in.”
I followed him into the immaculate space. White tile covered the floor, with an ice blue rug centered in the living room in front of dark leather couches. Tall glass sliders opened onto a large balcony where two single chairs were placed with a table between them.
The place was sparse, almost unlived in.
“I was about to grab a drink, you want one?” He pulled open the fridge in his open kitchen.
“Sounds good.”
He handed me a Cigar City beer. Colby drank craft beer, that didn't surprise me.
“You just get off work?” I asked.
He nodded. “One of my patients took a bad turn last night and they called me in.”
“They okay?”
“No.” His shoulders slumped. “I lost her.”
He led me out onto the balcony and I sat down, unable to take my eyes from him. He looked too despondent.
“You're in oncology, right?” I asked. “That's got to be hard here in Florida with all of the older folks. Do you lose a lot of patients?”
“April was nine.” He looked at me. “Jackson's age.” Taking a long sip of his drink, he looked off towards where the sun was beginning to set. “It's never easy, but when a patient is older, you can see it might just be their time. The kids, though, those you never get over.” A sigh shook his shoulders and he closed his eyes as he took another drink. “Subject change.”
“Ok, how about this. You've been avoiding me.”
“I haven't been avoiding you. I've been working.”
“Then I have a follow-up. Why wouldn't you avoid me?”
He gave me a long look before cracking the first smile since I'd arrived. “You make no sense.”
“Of course I do. Jay wants nothing to do with me. I expected you to be the same. I thought I'd have to basically force you to talk to me.”
“Like you could,” he scoffed. “You couldn't force me to do anything.”
I matched his smile.
“You want honesty?” he asked.
“I wouldn't expect anything less from a McCoy.”
“I've seen a lot over the past few years. When you spend all your time in a hospital, you witness other people's lives. I've seen people die, leaving behind a lot of devastated loved ones. I've seen people die, leaving behind no one at all. I've seen families reconcile over hospital beds, friends reconnect.” He drained the rest of his beer. “Maybe I don't see the point in waiting until something terrible happens to realize we're still family.”
“Colby - “
“I hate that you cut us off. I hate it so much. Not just for me, but Callie and even Jay.”
“Callie was married,” I felt the need to say. It didn't justify anything.
“You still don't get it. It wasn't about your damn feelings for her. It was about the fact that you were friends for more than ten years and only dated for half of one. Does the latter destroy the former?”
“That's not exactly true.” I didn't know why I was defending myself when I knew he was right. “I was friends with you. She was friends with Jay. She kind of hated me.”
“That's shit. Even if she didn't know it, you spent all those years protecting her. And she didn't hate you. You two would have done anything for each other. All four of us would have. But then you left and she left and we were fractured
. That's why I can forgive you, because I want us to be fixed more than anything else in the world. I don't want to stand over a hospital bed one day looking into the face of the guy who used to be my brother and realizing I don't know him anymore.”
My hand tightened up as I lifted my beer. I almost dropped the bottle, catching it with my other hand. Colby was watching me as I set the bottle down and massaged my bad hand, my fingers still curled as if holding an imaginary object. The pain barely registered as I pushed my fingers flat.
“I've changed, Colby. We all have. But it looks like we'll get the chance to see what that means because I'll be around for a while.”
“What happened?” Colby asked.
I hadn't yet told anyone, not even Callie. She still thought I'd be leaving soon to rejoin my platoon.
“If we're going to have this discussion.” I rose to my feet. “I need another beer.”
“I'll order a pizza. Sausage and pepper okay?”
“Is there any other kind?” I asked.
“See,” he said. “At least I know some things didn't change.”
I handed him a bottle as I took my seat again. Setting my bottle on the table with a sigh, I reached back and pulled my shirt off over my head.
Colby pulled his glasses down and straightened them on his nose as I showed him my shoulder.
“Shit.”
The bullet hadn't gone all the way through, lodging itself in the muscle instead. It required three surgeries to repair the damage. Ironically, it'd been one of the surgeries to cause most of the nerve damage to my arm.
The entry point itself was smooth and slightly red, but the skin around it was puckered and marked with scars from the surgeries. It had looked pretty gruesome soon after, but now just looked like it contained a good story.
“I don't remember getting shot,” I admitted. “I think that's a good thing. But my buddies told me the guy who got me was taken down when they came after me. I passed out, only to wake up hours after I'd been rescued with a medic tending me in a field hospital. I was flown to Germany soon after and my company was recalled, our mission unfinished.”
“Your hand - “
“Nerve damage. All down my arm.” I grabbed my beer bottle again and tipped it back against my lips, taking comfort in the cool liquid before giving him the final piece of the puzzle. “It's why I can't go back.”
I pulled my shirt back over my head and down my chest as the silence stretched between us. Colby thought for a moment, then reached out and put a hand on my shoulder. “Then you aren't staying in a hotel. I have an extra room.”
I nodded, unable to form words. I had a lot of good friends in the army, ones I risked my neck for time and again. They did the same for me, but none of them were Colby. He'd been there for me at a time in my life when I didn't have anyone else in my corner. He'd kept me going. A lot of the time he'd been the only reason I didn't go off the deep end. I'd screw up and he'd pull me back from the edge.
I'd made a huge mistake when I thought it was too hard to keep in touch, when I decided to just let the people of Gulf City be a part of my childhood. Growing up didn't necessarily mean growing apart. It was something I hadn't understood. But, as usual, Colby was smarter than me.
The pizza arrived and we'd both had enough of serious topics for now. Our talk moved on to the upcoming NHL season. He shared stories of his nephews and the funny things they did. I told him about the guys in my platoon and some of the crazier things we'd had to do.
And just like that, it was as it used to be; as it was supposed to be.
Chapter Eleven
Callie:
I took some much-needed space from Jamie. We'd barely spent time together and he already had me questioning everything. I moved home for a lot of reasons. I didn't want to raise my kids in L.A. any longer. It'd never felt like home. I wanted to be near Kat, Colby, and Jay. I never in a million years would have thought Jamie would come back.
But how long was he back for? He hadn't brought it up. I didn't know how leave worked in the army, but I knew it didn't last forever. There were things he wasn't telling me, but could I fault him? It wasn't like he had a whopper of a secret like I did.
The sad truth was, I didn't even know if I had a secret. I'd been too scared to have the test done and Dylan had assumed the role of father in Jackson's life. Did I have a right to take that away from either of them?
If Dylan were here, that'd be an easy no. Jackson would eventually deserve the truth, but not at nine years old.
I pushed my hair behind my ears, stepping around an older couple on the sidewalk as I walked through the downtown area.
I wanted to scream at something. Dylan wasn't here. That was his choice and it changed things.
My phone beeped. Another text message from my agent, Nicole. She was pushing hard for me to sell these movie rights. Of course she was. It'd be a huge paycheck for her. For me too. And for Dylan.
Divorce sucked. Especially when you publish a book months before the proceedings start. My hard work, my mother's story, was no longer just mine. What's mine is yours and all that bullshit. That'd probably explain the three missed calls I had from Dylan - not the fact that I was now raising his sons across the country.
Nicole: California, we need a meeting. Choose a time for a video call and I'll make it work.
I knew how this meeting was going to go.
Her: California, not selling these rights is a mistake.
Me: Good thing it's my mistake to make.
Her: You're being stubborn. Stop it.
Then I'd laugh because she'd known me for over six years, before there even was a finished book, and she knew me well.
I stopped under the overhang of a nearby building, shielded from the sun as I shot her back a message.
Me: Give me two hours.
I couldn't avoid this meeting forever, might as well get it over with.
Ignoring my missed calls, I stepped back out onto the sidewalk, only to be blocked by two burly men carrying a diner booth out the front door nearby.
A middle aged, dark-skinned woman followed them, smiling at me as she drew near.
“Getting an update?” I asked, gesturing to the ripped booth and then looking back at the building where the name “Boathouse” hung. There weren't any boats nearby, but it was Florida so I guessed the name sort of made sense.
“Vacating,” she explained. “My brother owned the place, but decided to move north. Too hard to make a go of it when the town is dead half the year.”
“I hear you,” I said, remembering how hard it had been to hear that Mom's diner was going under. “My family had a place around here about ten years ago, but season stopped being able to carry us through the summer.”
“Ahhh.” She laughed. “It's good to meet another person who's actually from here. Other people don't get it.”
“If it's your brother's place, why are you here?”
“Supervising.” She grinned. “He had an appointment and promised I wouldn't have to lift a finger.”
I liked the woman. “I wonder what it'd take to really do a business year-round in this town.”
She leaned in. “As a businesswoman myself, I hate to admit this. You need a gimmick. Daquiri deck across town seems to do well. Then you have the places further south that are former haunts of famous dead people. You need something that'll get you in the tour books.”
I must have looked lost in concentration, because she spoke loudly. “Wanna see the place?”
I agreed without a second thought.
I felt a surge of energy walking through the door, a surge of remembrance. Ally's had meant a lot to me growing up. It'd meant even more to my mom.
The interior was warm with wooden plank floors and Caribbean blue walls. The blue booths that were being taken out were old and torn, but the wooden tables were nice. Nautical paintings hung on the walls and a wooden boat hung from the ceiling.
The bar was oak and smooth with only a few imperfections in it.
“This place is gorgeous,” I said, stepping out of the way as two workmen bustled by.
“I'm sad to see him close up,” she said.
I stepped around the bar and went back into the kitchen. It needed a thorough cleaning, but seemed to be in fine order.
An idea began to form in my mind.
“I assume he doesn't own the building.”
“Oh no,” she said. “He rents, but the landlord is great. Are you in the market for a storefront?”
“I'm not sure.” It was honest at least.
She laughed and began shuffling through papers around the register, plucking a business card out of the mess. “This is the real estate company that rents this place.” She pulled a second card out of her purse. “I own a printing and design company. If you do decide to go for it, I'll give you a deal on menus, flyers, and the like. I'd like to see this place succeed.”
I looked down at her card then back up at her and smiled. “Nice to meet you Ana. I'm California.”
“What a cool name.” She laughed. “I'm assuming you have a gimmick in mind?”
“I just might.”
* * *
By the time I got home, I was late for my meeting with Nicole. Ignoring her phone call, I powered up my computer and pulled up the video chat. Her irritated expression filled my screen seconds later.
“Oh, you know you love me,” I said.
Her face softened. “Whatever Callie.” Nicole was just what you'd expect a trust fund L.A. woman to be like and I loved her for it. She was the one true friend I'd made in all my years out there, no matter how much we disagreed on business matters. In a way, I think it was because she reminded me of Morgan.
“A and P is offering more than Hendrick's at the moment,” she said.
“That's because my father's offer isn't exactly serious. His acquisitions department wanted Emma and he let them try. If he thought for a moment that I'd sell the rights, he'd outbid everyone. There's no way he'd let anyone else make that movie and there's no way I'd let anyone but him.”
“Then sell to him.”
I sighed.
“Tell me, Cal, why is it exactly that you're so against this?”
We Thought We Knew It All (Invincible Book 2) Page 6