by Marlie May
“Nobody there,” she said. “But I’m glad I looked. The back door was unlocked, and we can’t have that.” A shudder traveled through her slender body. “Without the house armed, we’re vulnerable to home invaders.”
I frowned. Home invaders?
Alex’s posture gave next to nothing away, but her shoulder shakes clued me in on the fact that she was snickering inside like me. I had to direct my attention to the TV. If Alex started laughing, I’d be hooting along with her.
“I’ll bring you your soup as soon as it cools.” With a big smile, Aunt Kristy hurried back to the kitchen.
Soup. Again. As if I longed for hot foods in this heat.
Who would’ve thought comfort foods would become her thing? If only she’d serve up pizza or tacos. They were comfort foods, too, weren’t they? My mom always said so.
I’d also kill for a plate of chocolate chip cookies.
“Well, that was interesting.” Alex covered her mouth, but her laughter slipped out.
“I’ll say.”
“I guess she’s right, though.” Alex’s voice lowered. “You can never be too careful. Even people you think you can trust can betray you.”
Had someone hurt her in the past? While we’d talked a number of times, about a variety of things, I barely knew her. I’d like to get to know her better, though.
“Is, um, Sean coming over today?” Alex’s attention slid toward the door.
“Probably.” My homework never ended. Kind of like my headaches. Fortunately, my teachers had let me put off doing my tests until I felt better.
Alex picked at the seam on her face garment.
She’d just arrived, but I had a sinking suspicion she’d run the second Sean walked through that door. What could I say to convince her she could trust him?
Outside, someone entered the access code to unlock the door. Sean, as expected.
“Hey,” he said, entering the room. He added to Alex,” How’s it going?”
She shrugged. “Okay.”
Since she’d turned partly away from me, I couldn’t quite read her mood. Funny how a person’s eyes gave so much away. Not that I could tell much with Alex and her funky glasses.
My cat, Chloe, started into the room from the foyer but came to a halt on the carpet. She fixed beady eyes on Sean and Alex, and her tail whipped back and forth, growing puffy to match the rising ridge on her spine. Her back arched and she hissed. Whirling around, she ran from the room.
“I’m sorry,” I said to Alex. “She usually loves strangers.” Demon cat.
Alex stared toward the foyer. “It’s okay. Maybe it’s the mask. Or I smell different.”
Sean dragged a chair over and sat facing us, asking Alex, “How did you do on that AP Chem test?”
“A hundred,” Alex said. Her shyness had returned. Head tilted downward, she peeked up at him through her glasses. “You?”
“Ninety-nine.”
Unlike all the other times someone beat him with a better grade, Sean didn’t act irritated that he hadn’t gotten the best score in the class. Or maybe his overall average was high enough he could afford not to be the best on this one test. I liked that Alex gave him some competition. Sean was too cocky about his grades.
“Did you miss that last problem?” Alex asked. “It was a killer.”
“I thought I’d gotten it right, but I guess not.” He shrugged. “But, it’s okay. I’ll ace the next one.”
Complacent, as usual.
Lifting my coffee, I sipped it. Yum. My dad had hated iced coffee, preferring to drink his hot and black, which Mom said was downright sacrilege. I couldn’t get enough of it. Good guess on Alex’s part to bring me some.
They moved the conversation from AP Chem to Trig. Another subject I struggled with but they obviously enjoyed. I was glad to see them finally beginning to get along.
Perhaps there was room in our little family for one more.
We visited for a while, talking about classes and gossiping about kids at school.
Until my aunt brought me soup in a container that was almost bigger than my head. Did she think I needed to eat a mixing bowl portion?
“I want you to eat every single bite,” she said, setting the steaming bowl on the coffee table in front of me.
It smelled good, but what was she trying to do? Fatten me up?
I lifted the spoon and stirred my supper. Ham soup wasn’t my favorite but this one smelled decent enough. Thick and creamy with tiny potato, carrot, and ham chunks.
Alex stood. “I need to go. Mom will be worried if I stay too long.” She half-smiled, and I could tell she wasn’t upset her mom hovered. Unlike me with Aunt Kristy. I couldn’t blame Alex and her mom for clinging to each other. They were all the other had. “I texted her and told her where I am, but she’ll be glad when I get home.” Her attention slid to me. “Oh, wait. Did I tell you we bought a house? We’re closing in a few weeks. Fast, because the sellers are moving to Florida.”
“That’s cool.”
Sean echoed my words.
I knew Alex would be happy having her own space. It couldn’t be fun living in a hotel.
“I can’t wait.” She strolled toward the foyer. “It’s only one block away from the ocean.”
I placed my soup on the coffee table. Although I’d taken a number of bites, I’d barely made a dent in it. “I’ll walk you out.”
“No need,” Alex said. Her lips quirked up on one side. “Don’t forget. Your aunt wants you to rest.”
I twisted my face. That was all I seemed to do lately. Rest. “I’ve gotta go to the bathroom, anyway.”
“See you tomorrow?” she said, adding to Sean, “Nice seeing you again.”
He nodded, his gaze focused on his phone.
When I returned to the living room, Sean lifted my soup bowl, a big grin on his face. “Your aunt checked in and was upset you hadn’t finished your supper. She was pretty adamant that I make you eat all of it.”
Huffing, I slumped onto the sofa cushions. “I don’t wanna.” Where was a container of ice cream when you needed one?
‘You play sickie,” he said, lifting the spoon. He dipped up a generous amount. “And I’ll feed you.”
My growl only made his grin widen.
“Come on,” he said. “Take a bite, honey.” He lifted the spoon high and wiggled it in the air. “Here comes the choo-choo.”
I laughed, because, jeez, this was ridiculous.
Stealth-Sean used the opportunity of my open mouth to shove in the bite. He kept at me, getting more creative with each spoonful until I was rolling on the sofa with tears of laughter streaming from my eyes. By then, the bowl was nearly empty.
“There,” he said in a high-pitched voice, continuing to mock my aunt. “You’ve been a good girl.”
I chuckled while he took my bowl into the kitchen, where I heard him set it in the sink and fill it with water. When he returned, he remained standing, and his sigh filled the room. “As much fun as it is to play nursemaid, I’ve got to run. I’m due at work in half an hour.”
“You should’ve had some soup. Now, you’ll miss supper.”
His face slackened. “Yeah, it looked good.”
Was he uncomfortable about the thought of eating now that my aunt lived here? He’d been over a thousand times when my parents were alive, for barbeques and take-out Chinese. But we hadn’t had him over since June. I needed to invite him for supper soon.
My aunt strolled into the room. Her gaze skimmed across me and settled on the coffee table, and she gave a pert nod. “Good. You finished.”
“As directed.” I resisted the urge to salute.
“You know I only want you well, and good nutrition is the key.”
“I’m heading out,” Sean said.
“It was good to see you again, Sean,” my aunt said with a smile, dispelling the notion that he wasn’t welcome.
He nudged my shoulder on the way by. “After swim practice tomorrow, I’ll bring new assignments.”
I yawned as he closed the front door behind him.
“You look exhausted,” my aunt said with concern.
“I’m bored.” I yawned again. “All I’ve done for days is sit around.” Well, outside of that horror-inducing excursion to Big Berry Island. “How can I be tired?”
“I think you should go lay down. The nurse said you needed to avoid stimulation. No more visitors.”
If she was going to start limiting my friends, this was going to turn into a war. Or family court.
My eyelids drooped. How could I feel so worn out all of a sudden? I’d barely done more than walk to and from the bathroom and lounge around with my feet up since someone cut my brake lines.
“Come on,” my aunt said, moving toward me with outstretched arms. “I’ll help you upstairs.”
Making sure my phone was still in my pocket, I stood. When my body wavered, Aunt Kristy grabbed me around the waist. She helped me cross the room and guided me up the stairs and down the hall to my room.
Whoa. My legs felt heavy. I could barely lift them. Maybe everything was catching up to me. With all the stress I’d been under lately, I’d barely slept. The doctors had asked me not to use my sleeping pills until I’d recovered from my concussion, saying the medication could make it harder for me to get over my brain injury. Not that I’d need any tonight. I had a feeling I’d be out before my head hit the pillow.
“I know it’s early,” Aunt Kristy said. “But the best thing for you is a full night of undisturbed rest.”
It would be nice to sleep through the night without waking from nightmares.
She helped me sit on the edge of my bed. While she tugged off my shirt and pulled my PJ top down over my head, she said, “I asked the mechanic to take a look at your mom’s car. A little tune up. I imagine you’ll be able to start driving it once you’re cleared to get behind the wheel.”
“I’d love that.” My words slurred. Damn, I was tired. Short of exhaustion, there was no way I’d ever let my aunt undress me. Months ago, she’d helped some after I came home from the hospital but never this much. I would’ve died of mortification if she’d seen me in my underwear.
Why didn’t I care now?
I yawned again.
“You’re worn out.” She clicked her tongue. “You should’ve said something, and I would’ve told your friends they had to leave. You’ve been in an accident, and you need rest more than the strain of making conversation.”
“Yup.” I listed backward. Aunt Kristy took the opportunity to ease me down onto my back. She lifted my legs onto the bed, tugged off my jeans, and pulled the blankets all the way up to my chin. Plumped my pillow.
Her tucking me in was nowhere near as fun as when Manuel had done it.
“We can get you a new phone, too,” she said. “I know how much you miss being able to chat with your friends.”
No need to let on that I’d snuck out with Manuel to get a new one already.
Barely able to keep my eyes open, I rolled onto my side and curled into a ball. I’d tell her about the phone tomorrow. When I could stay awake. And when I could think. Because thinking had become nearly impossible.
My aunt remained near the bed, nibbling on a fingernail. “Can I get you anything? A drink of water? A snack?”
“No,” I chuffed out.
“Okay, then.” She primped the blankets and pillow again, then stood beside me, frowning. “You obviously need a good night’s sleep. Rest is the best thing for you now. You promise to stay in bed all night?”
I nodded, because, at this point, I wasn’t sure I could form words.
“Janine?”
Hadn’t she seen my nod?
“Good,” she said. To me or to herself. I couldn’t tell. “Everything’s going to work out fine. Just so you know, I’m going to slip out for a bit.” She chuckled. “Boy, you are sleepy. No matter. I’ll be back before you even know I’ve been gone.”
Her feet padded across the carpet to the door.
I pried my eyes open. I’d had nothing to drink outside of the coffee, but the room spun like I’d chugged a keg of beer. This was worse than the cups and saucers at the fair.
My aunt’s footsteps continued in the hall and down the stairs. Her keys jangled when she pulled them from the bowl on the front hall table and the door thumped shut and the lock clicked behind her when she left.
I was alone.
It was all I could do to lift my hand to rub my head, which pounded worse than it had recently. Or, I struggled to lift my hand, that is. My aunt had tucked it underneath the covers, but that wasn’t the only reason I couldn’t reach. Moving any part of my body had become more challenging than climbing a mountain.
My eyelids wouldn’t stay open.
Outside, a car started and tires crunched in the drive as my aunt drove away.
So freakin’ tired. I hadn’t been this sleepy since they sedated me at the hospital after my car accident.
Sedated me.
The words rang through my mind.
Something was wrong.
I needed help, but Sean and Alex and my aunt had left. No one else planned to visit me tonight.
Manuel was doing something with his sister.
Manuel.
My heart thudded louder than thunder then flipped and slowed. It shouldn’t do that. It was supposed to pump steady.
A roar filled my ears, and the world rushed around me like the water had engulfed my head that night in the ocean.
Panic took hold of me, shouting I needed to wake up. Do something before it was too late.
Groaning, I rolled onto my side and strained to reach my jeans draped over my desk chair. I needed my phone. Snagging a belt loop, I yanked them close, flopping them onto my bed. Yes. I pulled my phone from my pocket.
Lifting it, I almost dropped it. I panted, my lungs burning as I clicked into Messages. I tapped on Manuel.
My clunky fingers resisted, but I made them type…
…Help me
25
I jolted awake to bright lights overhead for the second time in a matter of days. My mind remained stuck in the deep well it had fallen into, where I was drowning.
And even though my throat felt like I’d swallowed razor blades, I made it croak, “Help.”
“Thank the Lord, Janine,” my aunt said from where she sat beside me, holding my hand. “Honey.” She sniffed and wiped her eyes with a tissue. “How could you?”
“What?” I struggled to sit, but my body flopped back down on the stiff mattress.
“Lie still. You—” Her eyes flicked away from mine as if she couldn’t bear to look at me. This made no sense. “Why did you take all those pills? And that note you left on your desk.” Her shoulders shook and tears pooled in her eyes. They trickled down her cheeks before she wiped them away again. “I know you’ve been depressed since the accident. Who wouldn’t be? You lost your parents and your best friend, which would defeat just about anyone. But to feel so hopeless…I don’t understand.”
“What are you talking about?” What note? Hopeless? Yes, I’d been depressed since I lost my family and Brianna but I was coping. Learning to deal with it.
“I can’t believe you felt you had no choice but end your life.”
My eyes popped open, and I shouted, “End my life?” What was she talking about?
“I know there are times when you might feel there’s nothing left to live for, that you can’t get out of your head long enough to consider others.” Her breath shuddered. “But I thought you knew I was here for you. I’d begun to believe we were friends.”
Before I could comprehend what she was saying, a nurse entered the room, followed by Manuel.
Aunt Kristy tapped my hand, carefully avoiding my IV. “But you’re in the right place now. We’ll get you the help you need. Outpatient or even inpatient, if t
hat’s what it takes.”
Inpatient. As in, committing me to a psych facility?
Anxiety bolted through me but while my heart fluttered, I could barely move. What was going on here? The last thing I remember, I was lying in bed. So sleepy.
“I imagine your throat hurts,” the nurse said. “They pumped out your belly.” She wrapped the blood pressure cuff around my upper arm, sympathy shining on her narrow face. “You’ll find your voice is scratchy for a few days.” She pushed a button that beeped, and the cuff inflated.
“I’m so grateful Manuel found you.” Aunt Kristy gulped. “He found the note—and you—in the nick of time.” She waved a piece of paper in the air like a white flag of surrender.
I snagged it and lifted it in front of my face.
The blood pressure cuff slowly ticked down until it went slack, and I absently lifted my arm so the nurse could remove it. I was getting too used to hospital procedures.
But the note.
I miss Mom. Dad. Brianna. I’m sorry.
“This isn’t my handwriting.”
Aunt Kristy frowned. “Of course, it is.” She flicked the note with her index finger. “How could you do this? Has your life really been this bad?”
“I didn’t do anything,” I whispered. Then louder, “I haven’t taken my pills in over a week.”
“Well, they’re all gone now. The emergency personnel found the empty bottle on the floor beside your bed. There had to be at least thirty pills left in there. And the note was found on your desk.”
This couldn’t be happening. My heart drummed louder than a thousand horses racing across a plain. Panic clawed through me, and my wide eyes met Manuel’s. Did he think I tried to kill myself, too?
“A psychologist will be in to see you soon,” the nurse said. “I’ll let them know you’re awake.” With a nod to Aunt Kristy, she left the room.
My aunt took the note from me and tucked it inside her purse.
I stared around wildly. Psychologists and inpatient sounded like something from a horror movie, the kind where the family committed the poor woman to a facility ‘for her own good’ in order to make off with her inheritance.