Sarasota Dreams

by Mayne, Debby

  Shelley let out a deep sigh. Even after Jeremiah had saved her mother from having to walk back home with aching feet, she still hadn’t softened. “Look, Mother, I’m not going to do anything I shouldn’t do. Jeremiah says he’s committed his life to the Lord, and from my perspective, it appears that he has.” Even though Shelley rarely outwardly rebelled, she wasn’t about to openly admit her own doubts about Jeremiah.

  Silence fell between them for a moment. Shelley felt as though the conversation didn’t stand a chance of having any resolution, so she thought it best to end the discussion. Her mother apparently thought otherwise.

  “So you’re saying that you don’t have any doubts about Jeremiah’s motives on coming around again?”

  “No, I’m not saying that.” Deep down, Shelley feared that what her mother was saying was true, and she would have been on her mother’s side if she’d been talking to Jeremiah. But when he looked at her as he had a half hour ago, she wanted to believe him, even though she wouldn’t let him know. “I just think we need to give him the benefit of proving himself.”

  “Shelley, you can be so naive.”

  “He helped Abe when that awful man came to hurt Mary,” Shelley reminded her mother.

  “Don’t base your opinion of him on a few good deeds. He was away from the church for a number of years, and it’ll take much more than that to show he’s changed for the good.”

  Shelley didn’t have an argument for that, so she finally backed away. “We need to finish preparing supper so Father and William have something to eat when they come home.”

  The cloud of their conversation hung over them as they finished cooking. By the time William walked through the door, Shelley was exhausted more from what wasn’t being said than from what was.

  “Can you take me to the park before supper?” William asked.

  “Not now,” Shelley replied. “I’m busy.”

  William’s face scrunched into a pout. He opened his mouth to say something, but Shelley noticed their mother giving him a look that stopped him.

  Shelley wished Mother would give William a little more room to explore on his own. After all, he was seventeen. But unless he was at school, work, or in the van that took him to work, Mother insisted someone from the family be with him.

  Jeremiah appreciated the physical labor of farmwork. It enabled him to reflect on not only his conversation with Shelley two days ago but also conversations he’d had with some of the church elders over the past several months since he’d come back to his Mennonite roots. He was constantly being questioned about his motives and why he’d chosen this time to come back to the church. The reasons didn’t seem clear, although he had no doubt that the Lord sometimes painfully taught him lessons that steered him back. He explained that to Abe, who seemed to understand, but his answers didn’t satisfy everyone.

  The people who never questioned him were Jonathan and his son, Charles, a couple of outsiders Abe hired to help out on the farm. Jeremiah enjoyed working with them.

  “Watch out, Jeremiah,” Jonathan said with a teasing tone. “A man who thinks too much can get hurt.”

  Jeremiah chuckled. “You’re right. I’ve been thinking too much lately.”

  “Care to talk about it?” Jonathan raked his fingers through his half-gray, half-brown hair. “Not saying I have all the answers, but sometimes it helps to talk.”

  “If I had any idea what to talk about, I’d probably welcome the opportunity, but my thoughts are so jumbled they don’t even make sense to me.”

  Jonathan nodded his understanding. “I know exactly what you’re saying. This world is confusing, which is why I brought my son here to learn what’s really important.”

  Jeremiah glanced over at Jonathan’s son, Charles, who was busy hauling lumber from the old barn to the scrap pile. “Charles seems to be in his element here on the farm.”

  “He and I are both much happier than we’ve ever been. No high-powered executive job has ever left me with the sense of accomplishment that I get from working here.”

  “I know what you mean.”

  “Yes,” Jonathan said with a nod. “I know you do. And one of these days, others will see that in you. Some people just need to get burned a few times before we come to our senses.”

  “That’s a good way of putting it. I needed to get burned before I understood what I had. And now I want that back. The Lord’s favor is all that matters to me right now.”

  “It’s okay to want the girl, too,” Jonathan said.

  Jeremiah grinned. “Am I that obvious?”

  “Yes, you definitely are. Any chance you’ll be letting go of the car?”

  “Abe and I have been talking about it. I already traded in my sports car for the plain one, but it’s hard to give up transportation.”

  “I know what you mean. Charles and I have been talking about that. He seems more amenable to it than I am, but if I ever decide to embrace the lifestyle, it seems the right thing to do. My wife isn’t ready yet, but she seems happier already now that we’ve decided to try and sell the house.”

  The clanging sound of the triangle signaling lunchtime got their attention. “I’m starving,” Jeremiah said as he patted his belly. “Another cool thing about working here is being able to eat anything I want and not having to worry about an expanding waistline. It seemed like no matter how much time I spent at the gym before, I always had to loosen my belt a notch or two after a big meal.”

  After they finished the bag lunches they’d brought from home, Abe approached Jeremiah. “Do you mind taking me to town? I have to deliver some produce to Penner’s.”

  “I’ll be glad to.”

  “I thought you might.” Abe turned to Jonathan. “Tell your wife we enjoyed her pineapple upside-down cake. Mary would like the recipe.”

  “Lori will be flattered,” Jonathan said. “I’ll have her jot down the recipe.” Abe gave a clipped nod. “Good. Jeremiah, let me know when you’re ready to go.”

  Jeremiah finished the last of his sandwich and rose from the picnic bench. “Time to take the boss to town.”

  “I’ll save some of the work for you when you get back,” Jonathan said as he stood. “Drive carefully.”

  As soon as Abe got into Jeremiah’s car, he started talking. “I heard you created quite a stir in town on Monday.”

  Jeremiah frowned as he reflected. He didn’t know what Abe was talking about. “I did?”

  “Ya. Shelley’s mother was very unhappy about you showing up.”

  “Oh, that. Well, I didn’t mean to cause any trouble. It’s just that I saw Shelley and her mother walking, so I thought I’d offer them a ride.”

  “Just remember that it takes a while to earn forgiveness from people who have been hurt. When you left, you upset some folks.”

  “That wasn’t my intention.”

  “It doesn’t have to be. It just happens that way sometimes.”

  When Jeremiah had to stop for a light, he turned to Abe. “What can I do to make things better?”

  “If you’re asking how you can hurry things along, I don’t have any answers. But if you want to make amends with individual people, you can talk to them and explain your reasons for coming back. They need to know you have no motive other than to please the Lord and do His calling.”

  Jeremiah wished it were that simple, but he knew it wasn’t. He’d always cared for Shelley, but she’d always seemed leery of him even when they were younger. That’s why he’d been surprised when she’d gotten into his car on Monday.

  “If you want to court Shelley, you need to make things right with her parents first.”

  “I doubt they’ll bother talking to me,” Jeremiah said.

  “Have you tried?”

  “No.”

  “Then do that first. You knew coming back wouldn’t be easy.”

  “True.” Jeremiah accelerated as the light turned green. “Something I’ve been wondering, Abe.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You did
n’t put me through the paces when I wanted to come back. Everyone else has one question after another, but you accepted what I said from the get-go. Why was that?”

  Abe shrugged. “I s’pose I’ve always been a direct sort of man, and I’ve known you to be that way with me. There wasn’t any reason for me to doubt you—particularly after you swallowed your pride when I talked to you about your crudeness with Mary.”

  Jeremiah cringed as he remembered his comments. “That was totally out of line. The second I hollered at you, I regretted it. I’m afraid I picked up some bad habits.”

  “But you apologized, and you seemed sincere. Mary and I have both forgiven you.”

  “Now I need to ask a lot of other people for their forgiveness.”

  “Ya. That’s exactly what you have to do. Some people will accept your words, and others will wait and watch your actions.”

  “That’s a lot of pressure.”

  “Pressure is part of life,” Abe said. “After you establish yourself back in the church, there will be something else. Walking with the Lord isn’t easy for anyone.”

  “How about you, Abe? Do you feel pressure about anything?”

  “Ya, of course I do. But I don’t lose sleep over it. Mary and I pray about whatever is on our minds, and we go to sleep knowing we’re in the Lord’s good graces. As Christians, we are His faithful servants, even when we slip up. He has never let us down.”

  That was exactly what Jeremiah needed to hear. He helped Abe unload the produce from the trunk, and then Joseph Penner asked them to stick around. Abe accepted, but Jeremiah asked if he could run an errand of his own. Abe smiled knowingly and nodded.

  On the way to the Burkholders’ house, Jeremiah prayed for the Lord’s mercy and for the wisdom to say the right thing to Shelley’s mother. Pride had always been a problem for Jeremiah, but he knew the Lord was working on that.

  He pulled up in front of the Burkholders’ house, stopped, and said a prayer for guidance. His hands were damp and a little shaky as he got out of the car and walked up to the front door. After a brief pause, he knocked.

  The silence gave him the impression no one was home, so he turned to leave. The sound of the door opening behind him caught his attention. He turned around and saw Mrs. Burkholder glaring at him.

  “What do you want, Jeremiah?”

  “I’d like to talk to you, if you’re not too busy.”

  The woman tightened her jaw and narrowed her eyes. “Shelley isn’t here right now.”

  “I know. That’s why I came. I’d like to talk to you alone.”

  She continued to scrutinize him, making him feel small and weak. Finally, she nodded. “I suppose you can come in, but not for long. I have chores to do.”

  Grateful for an opportunity to talk to Shelley’s mother, Jeremiah followed the woman into her tidy little house, which was almost the exact same layout as the one he’d grown up in. She led him to the kitchen, which overlooked an equally well-kept backyard.

  “Would you like some coffee?” she asked.

  “No thank you.” He gestured toward the kitchen table. “Mind if we sit?”

  She looked at the table and then took a step toward the chair. “I hope you realize I’m not in favor of you seeing my daughter.”

  “Yes, I’m aware of that, but I’d like to find out if there’s anything I can do to prove myself.”

  “You’ve already proven yourself, Jeremiah, and I don’t mean that in a good way.”

  “I’m working hard now, Mrs. Burkholder. Abe has given me a job on his farm, and I’m back in the church now. What else can I do to show you I’m sincerely repentant of my indiscretions?”

  She pursed her lips and shook her head. “I don’t think there’s anything you can do for my husband and me to give you our blessing to see our daughter.”

  That was what Jeremiah had been afraid of. He hung his head and sent up a prayer. Finally, after a few more minutes of quiet, he stood. “I better go pick Abe up from the restaurant. I told him I wouldn’t be long.”

  “You know your way out,” Mrs. Burkholder said.

  He nodded and turned to leave when the sound of someone knocking at the door echoed through the house. Mrs. Burkholder jumped to her feet and ran along behind him.

  When Jeremiah opened the door, he found himself face-to-face with a sheriff’s deputy. “Officer,” he said in greeting.

  The deputy leaned around Jeremiah. “Mrs. Burkholder, we just got a call that your son, William, has wandered off from the school. A deputy has been dispatched to search the area, but I wanted to let you know.”

  “I’ll help,” Jeremiah said without a moment’s hesitation. “I’ll go get Abe, and we’ll get right to work.”

  Mrs. Burkholder was right behind him. “I’m coming with you.”

  The officer stepped up. “Someone needs to stay here in case William comes home.”

  Jeremiah looked at the woman, who now looked frail. “Why don’t you wait here? I have the car, so we can cover a larger area.”

  Her forehead crinkled in concern, and she nodded. “I don’t have any way of communicating.”

  Jeremiah pulled the cell phone out of his pocket and handed it to her. “I’ll find a phone and call you if—when—we find him.”

  She hesitated before nodding and accepting the phone. “If I don’t hear from you soon, I’ll walk over to Penner’s.”

  “Please stay right here, ma’am,” the deputy advised. “Someone needs to be home if he decides to return on his own.”

  Jeremiah scooted past the deputy and ran out to his car. By the time he arrived at Penner’s, another deputy had stopped by and made Abe, Mr. Penner, and Shelley aware of what had happened. Shelley was beside herself.

  “Any idea where he might have gone?” he asked Shelley.

  “He wanders from home sometimes,” Shelley replied. “But I can’t imagine why he left the school. He loves his teacher. I’m worried that something terrible has happened to him. Someone needs to let my father know.”

  The deputy nodded. “We’ve sent someone to his workplace to tell him.”

  Jeremiah shook his head. “I have a feeling we’ll find him, but we shouldn’t wait too long. Why don’t you come with me?”

  Shelley turned to Mr. Penner, who nodded. “Okay.”

  “Oh, I gave your mother my cell phone, so I’ll need a way to stay in touch.”

  Shelley reached into her apron pocket and pulled out a phone. “I have mine.”

  “Then let’s go. We don’t need to waste any time.”

  Jeremiah and Shelley ran out to Jeremiah’s car. “Let’s swing by the school and drive around the block. We can widen our search as we go.”

  She swallowed hard and nodded. “My little brother is so trusting. I sure hope he didn’t go off with someone.”

  “Who would he go off with?”

  Shelley shrugged. “Maybe someone offered him something he wanted.”

  “How old is William now?”

  “Seventeen,” she replied. “Almost eighteen.”

  “It’s not like he’s a little boy someone would want to abduct. He’s almost as tall as me, and he looks strong, so I doubt anyone could force him to do anything.”

  “Ya, he’s very strong.”

  “Then let’s not worry. We’ll find him.”

  There was no activity in the school yard. “Looks like the teachers are keeping the kids inside.” Jeremiah circled the block then turned down another street to widen their search. “Any thoughts about where he might be?”

  Shelley tapped her chin with her index finger. “He loves ice cream, so he might have gone to one of the ice cream shops.”

  “Does he know how to find them?”

  “I’m not sure. One of us is usually with him.”

  “Let’s check out Slater’s Creamery. That’s the closest to the school.”

  “Good idea,” Shelley said. “He likes their vanilla bean.”

  Jeremiah pulled up in front and waited in the ca
r while Shelley ran inside to ask if anyone had seen William. Hope welled inside him until she came back to the car shaking her head.

  “Neh, they said they haven’t seen him since we were there last week.”

  Jeremiah drove to a few more places Shelley suggested, but they continued turning up empty. “He can’t have gone very far since he’s on foot.”

  Shelley’s chin quivered. “But what if he’s not on foot? What if he got into someone’s automobile?”

  “He wouldn’t do that, would he?” Jeremiah asked as he continued driving slowly and looking down the side streets. “I mean, you and your parents have taught him it’s not safe to wander off with strangers, right?”

  “Of course, but he’s still so trusting. William is one of the sweetest people in the world, so if someone said the right thing, he might have gone off with them.”

  Jeremiah pulled over to the curb. “Before we go on, let’s say a prayer.”

  Shelley nodded as a tear trickled down her chin. Jeremiah put the car into Park and took hold of both of her hands. He prayed for William’s safety and that he’d be found soon so everyone could stop worrying. After he said, “Amen,” he opened his eyes and saw Shelley staring at him. Shortly after their gazes met, she lowered her head.

  He reached out and tucked his finger beneath her chin. “Shelley, I want to be there for you—now and after we find William. Will you at least give me a chance?”

  She opened her mouth but quickly closed it. A few seconds later she said, “I don’t know, Jeremiah. Everything is so confusing right now. All I can think about is finding my little brother.”

  Yes, of course. What had Jeremiah been thinking? He wanted to kick himself in the backside for being selfish enough to turn things around to his feelings for Shelley.

  “I’m sorry, Shelley. My timing was off. I just want you to know how much I care and that I have confidence we’ll find William.”

  “What if we don’t this time?” she asked, fear evident in her expression.

  “We will.” He took her hand and squeezed it. “We always do. We just have to trust the Lord.”

  Chapter 3

  He’d driven a few hundred feet when Shelley’s hand flew to her mouth. “I think I might know where he is. Turn here,” she said, pointing to a narrow road to the right. “He has been asking me to take him to the park when he gets home from school lately, but I was always so busy.”