by Nikki Ash
We must be admiring his home for a while because he walks out of the red door with a quizzical look on his face and says, “It’s not going to bite you. Get in here you two.” I nod quickly and go back to the trunk to grab our stuff as Bella runs up to the door. Cooper meets me at the trunk and helps me grab all the stuff.
“This car isn’t suitable for driving Bella around. We need to do something about that soon.”
He says it so nonchalantly I almost think he is just thinking aloud, until he looks at me and raises his one eyebrow.
“Let’s just focus on one issue at a time. I can’t afford a new car and once I find a job my money needs to go towards a new place for Bella and I, and hopefully Kayla, too.”
His jaw ticks like he wants to protest but he decides to let it go. Good thinking on his part, that’s for sure.
We get inside and the first thing I do is introduce Cooper to Bella. Although she has seen him a couple times, they haven’t formally met.
“Bella, this is Cooper. We are going to be staying here in his home for a little bit. Cooper, this is Bella.”
They both suddenly look so shy. “Hi, I’m Bella. You found my flamingo when it fell at the store. I have a new one now because it went away in the fire.”
“Actually, Bella, Cooper is the one who bought you the new one and… he’s the one who bought me the one you had before.”
Bella’s eyes bug out with this new information. “You are the special person who gave my mom the flamingo?”
Cooper nods his head. “Yes, I gave it to your mom five years ago when I met her. She said she liked to count animals when she couldn’t sleep.”
Bella laughs. “She still does! When I can’t sleep she always counts the flamingos for me until I fall asleep.”
Cooper looks to be so overcome with emotions.
“Yup, I count flamingos. Anyway, how about you give us a quick tour of this beautiful house and show us to our rooms?”
I hope Bella’s room isn’t far from mine. I have never been too far from her. Bella must now notice the stairs because she starts squealing. “Yay! Stairs! I love stairs. Is my room up the stairs? Huh, is it? Please? I will be so happy and I promise to walk so slowly up and down the stairs. Please! ”
Cooper starts chuckling at her rambling on and I can already see the love in his eyes. Bella is easy to love. I just hope it’s enough to keep him around, for her sake.
“There are four bedrooms. The master is on this floor with its own bathroom along with the library-slash-office and a half bath in the laundry room. Upstairs are two more bedrooms. One is your bedroom.”
He stops for a second because she starts jumping up and down saying, “Thank you” over and over again. When she calms down he continues.
“There’s a bathroom connected to your bedroom and the third bedroom was converted into a small gym. There’s another guest bathroom up there as well.”
Bella doesn’t even wait for him to tell her it’s ok to head upstairs. She is already flying up the stairs. So much for taking them slow.
We both follow her up the stairs and when we catch up she is standing outside her room with her hands over her mouth. “Is-Is this my room?” She asks with such hope in her voice.
I walk closer to see what the big deal is and when I look inside I see the most beautiful little girls room I have ever laid eyes on. The room is light pink with a white chair rail running along the length of the walls. On the walls are huge hangings of all the different Disney princess characters including a huge hanging of Cinderella’s Castle. In the center is a huge bed fit for a princess with pink and white polka dotted bedding and in front of the pillows is the dragon from Maleficent she has been asking for. Bella spots it and hugs it to her chest and then continues to look around the room. There is also a delicate light pink silk canopy spread out over the top. Wood dresser and nightstands are placed against the walls and since the floors are all hardwood, there’s a cute pink princess rug spread over the center of the room. Near the bathroom there is a sitting room that is about half the size of the bedroom. Against one wall is the most adorable pink chair that looks like it is from Pottery Barn kids and on the other wall is a flat screen television with a DVD player. I walk into the bathroom and the princess theme continues. I look back at Cooper and he looks uneasy like he is suddenly not sure of himself.
Bella is running around the room checking it all out and then stops right in front of Cooper and asks, “Is this all mine? Like really mine? Like black-black no trade back, mine?”
“Um, I am not sure what black-black no trade back means but yes, this is your room. I hope you like it. I wasn’t really sure what you are into.” And there’s a small frown on his face when he says this.
I jump in to stop him. He is second-guessing all of this and he shouldn’t be. He just made Bella’s entire year.
“What you did here is amazing, Cooper. I don’t even know how to thank you. Any chance my room looks half as good as this?” I ask jokingly to lighten up the mood.
He starts laughing and I get to see his beautiful smile. I can’t help but smile back.
“Well, I haven’t done anything to the master bedroom since I moved in but you are welcome to add or change anything you like.” He says with a huge knowing smirk across his face.
It takes a second but then I remember when he named all the rooms he didn’t mention a room for me. Motherfucker. He thinks he is slick. Two can play this game.
“Oh, that’s ok. I am sure this bed is big enough for Bella and me to share.” Liz: 1 Cooper: 0
Bella looks back and forth from the bed to me, and with hands on her hips says, “Mommy, I am almost five years old. I don’t want to share a bed with you. Remember when I tried to sneak in your bed before you told me big girls sleep in their own beds.” Well damn it she has me there.
I turn around to give Cooper the evil eye and almost run right into his chest. He must have moved closer to me while Bella was giving me her mom speech. I can see his eyes laughing at me as he sucks in his bottom lip to keep from laughing aloud.
“Don’t worry baby girl. My bed is big enough for the both of us.” Then the cocky bastard winks. He actually winks. He is so lucky our daughter is in the room or I would choke him with my bare hands.
Cooper: 1 Liz: 1
I rub my hands over my face in frustration and then walk out of the room. I walk towards the room that holds the gym and open the door to see if I can put a bed in here. Unfortunately the room filled with tons of gym equipment, and a bed, no matter the size, would never fit. I continue down the stairs opening each door along the way. I open the door to the master bedroom and close it immediately. I can feel Cooper on my heels but I choose to ignore him.
When I open the door to the library-office, I notice there is a comfy over sized reading chair in one corner and a chaise lounge in the other. Well, this will have to do.
“I will just sleep in here. Hopefully I will find a job soon and then we will be out of your hair. Until then I can just sleep on this couch. It looks super comfy.” Ha! Another point for me.
Cooper walks up to me slowly like he’s afraid I might attack him. I almost laugh at how nervous he looks. He grabs ahold of both sides of my waist and before I realize what he is doing he kisses me softly on the mouth. I sigh at the comfort his touch brings to me. He pulls away too quickly but then he comes back again this time placing one kiss to right behind my ear. I can feel my nipples pebble so I step back before I embarrass myself.
“Look, I know I have messed up but I am here now and I am fighting. Just give me a second chance to fight for us. Let me at least have one more shot. I have a proposition for you, if you will hear me out.”
There’s now a lump in my throat. This is all I ever wanted. I nod my head for him to continue.
“I have a job opening at the gym. My dad ran all the books. I have no clue what I am doing and I am too busy training to focus on the money aspect of the business. Come to work for me and live here. Giv
e me this last chance to fight for my family. If after awhile you don’t want this, you can move out and we can figure out the custody arrangement for Bella. But I really hope it doesn’t come to that. I want both of you. Please.”
I want to say no because I feel like he is just giving me a job that I didn’t earn but I need the money and would be great to work in the same place as Hayley and Kayla plus Cooper would be there often. The problem is can I give him another chance? He has already broken my heart once. I don’t think I would survive a second time.
He takes my chin between his fingers and kisses me once again on my mouth letting it linger for a few seconds when we both hear little feet padding into the room and a shriek coming from Bella.
“Ewww you guys are kissing like Cinderella and the Prince! Does this mean Cooper can be my daddy? He gave me the most amazing room ever and I love him now.”
I laugh at that. It clearly doesn’t take much to win over my daughter. Cooper looks scared shitless and that makes me nervous. I elbow him and tilt my head to the side silently asking if he’s ok.
He snaps out of it and whispers, “She wants me to be her daddy and she loves me.” It must all be hitting him at once.
“Bella, why don’t you go pick a movie for us to watch and we will be out in a minute.” Yup! Parent of the year award goes to me for once again ignoring her daddy question. She says ok and runs out to pick a movie.
I look up at Cooper and I see a mixture of emotions going through him. He backs up to the couch and sits down.
“I never thought anybody would ever call me daddy. And when she asked if I could be her daddy I thought it would scare me to death but it didn’t. I just wanted to grab her and hug her and never let her go. I barely even know her and I already love her more than life itself. I felt it in the hospital when you said she was brought in but hearing her calling me daddy; my heart feels like it just grew ten times bigger. I just want to give her the world.”
“I know what you mean. When she was born I held her in my arms and stared at her unable to believe she was mine. I guess it’s a parent’s love. You don’t have to know everything about her to feel that connection.”
He looks up at me and I see a single tear fall down his cheek. He shakes his head and says, “I missed it all. I missed you being pregnant. I bet you were so beautiful carrying our little girl. I missed her birth, her first steps, and her first words. Damn it, Liz. I missed everything. All because I was a fucking idiot that thought I didn’t deserve any of this so I pushed you away. For four years I had a daughter who had no father all because of the choices I made. I will never be able to get any of that back.”
I move closer to Cooper and put my hands into his. “You didn’t know Cooper. It wasn’t your fault. You had a crappy childhood and you made the choices you thought were best at the time. I was just going off to college. I didn’t try to give you my number either.” He looks over at me and gives me a small smirk.
“Yeah, that was cute the way you got into a twenty-one and older club and acted like you just graduated college. Any younger and you would have been jail-bait.”
I smile big and stick my tongue out at him. Wait until he hears the other half of it. “Oh, well you also didn’t realize that I was a virgin when we hooked up.”
His eyes bug out and he gets serious. “Liz, what the fuck! I took you in the shower our first time. Why didn’t you tell me? I would have been more gentle or caring…” I cut him off at that.
“No, you were perfect. My first time, and second time, and hell third time were all perfect. I don’t regret anything we did. I wasn’t lying when I said I was on the pill. The problem was I had only just started it a couple days before. I didn’t plan to have sex so I didn’t look into when it becomes effective. I had no clue birth control pills take a week to work. I got to Las Vegas and four weeks later after throwing up for days went to the doctor. She confirmed I was pregnant.”
“I can’t even imagine how scared you were. I wish I could have been there for you. I am so sorry, Liz.”
“It’s ok.” I say honestly. “Kayla was there every step of the way. We worked part time and took classes and both graduated together. It wasn’t easy but we did it.”
He sighs loudly and shakes his head. “You are the strongest woman I know. You are raising a beautiful, sweet little girl. Thank you for taking such good care of her. But I am here now. Please give me the chance to take care of you.”
“I want to, Cooper. I want to so badly. The problem is you told me several times you don’t want to be a father or a husband. I know I owe it to you to let you get to know Bella but I am scared for her and for me. I don’t know if I can handle you breaking my heart, again. What if you wake up one day and decide you really don’t want a family after all? Then what? What would I say to Bella? How would I explain to her that her daddy doesn’t want her? You heard her. She has been on this daddy kick for weeks. She hears at school all the kids have a daddy and in her movies and shows there’s a mommy and daddy. She wants one so badly. What if I tell her you are her daddy and then you change your mind? You will devastate her. And I will be left to pick up the pieces.”
I go to swipe the traitor tear away but Cooper gets to it first. “Baby girl, I know my words don’t hold any weight. I know I have confused the shit out of you with everything I’ve said. But I promise you I am not going anywhere. I know you don’t owe me anything but please just give me a chance to prove I am in this for the long haul, with you and Bella.”
It suddenly occurs to me that he isn’t playing a game. He isn’t keeping points and it doesn’t do any good for me to play games. Bella deserves for us to try. We deserve for us to try.
I know there’s a chance Bella and I can end up hurt but I want so badly for the other option, the one where we end up together as a family.
So I give in and say, “Ok, one more chance Cooper. We will see how good of a fighter you really are.”
He grabs my waist and pulls me up into his lap and says thank you. Then he kisses me like I just told him he has won the lottery. His lips attack mine. His hands rub all over my body, up my arms, over my breasts, down my back. I can feel him getting excited between my legs.
Instinctively I grind against his hardness while lacing my fingers into his hair that’s just long enough to grab ahold of. We continue to kiss and his fingers tweak my nipples over my clothes. I need him. I need his body on mine without any clothes, and then suddenly I am flying through the air and hitting the couch. What the heck?
I look at him like he has damn near lost his mind and he shakes his head quickly looking towards the doorway and in the next second in walks Bella. Holy. Shit. What kind of mother forgets her daughter is in the other damn room while trying to get laid?
Cooper starts to chuckle guessing what’s going on in my head. He leans over and whispers, “Tonight, baby girl. You are all mine tonight.” And with that my panties go wet.
Damn this man and his way with words.
Chapter Fifteen
Cooper
Liz, Bella, and I get situated in the living room to watch some movie called Frozen as Bella explains why she wants to watch this movie even though it came out a long time ago. It is so hard to keep a straight face listening to my four year old explain why it’s ok to watch an old movie even though she has lots of new movies.
“It’s not that I don’t want to watch Dolphin Tale. It’s still my favoritest ever. It’s just that I love Anna and Elsa and I have decided I want to be Elsa for Halloween. I can’t be a dolphin for Halloween because that would be so silly!”
She says all this as she explodes into a fit of giggles at her own comment. I have no idea what she is talking about but she is the cutest damn thing.
Liz obviously understands completely as they go back and forth about her Halloween Costume.
“Mom, it’s so important to get my costume now. If I wait too long and they are out of Elsa I will die.” Holy shit. Apparently costume shopping is a life or death si
tuation to a kid.
“Bella, why don’t you wait to decide what you want to be for Halloween? We still have six weeks and you might change your mind.”
Bella huffs and walks away clearly not happy with her mother’s answer but chooses not to argue either. Oh man, I haven’t lived with a woman in years, and now I am living with two. This should be interesting.
After popping some popcorn and ordering a pizza, we all get comfortable. Liz is snuggled up to me with her head resting just under my chin. Bella is spread out lying on pillows from the couches across the floor. She looks so adorable lying on her belly with her hands under her chin. I should probably be focusing on the movie but I can’t help watching my girls. My girls. I had no idea I even wanted any of this and now, sitting here with them, my heart feels so full.
The pizza arrives and we all eat in front of the television still watching the movie. Bella gets up every time a song comes on and dances across the room belting out all of the words. She has an awesome personality. When the guy, who I think is a prince, kisses the girl, Bella looks back and gives her mom and I a knowing look. I laugh softly at that and give Liz a kiss on her forehead. She looks up at me and smiles contently.
The movie ends and Liz announces to Bella it’s time for bed. She groans and begs for ten minutes but Liz isn’t having it. I wonder if she is thinking about what I mentioned earlier.
Bella says, “Fine.” Then stomps up the stairs to her room. I am not sure what my role in all this is, since we still haven’t told her I am her dad so I hang back and wait to see what Liz wants me to do. A few minutes later I hear Bella scream my name from upstairs and I head up there to make sure everything is ok.
“Hey princess, you ok?” I ask as I walk into her room. She is wearing one of the nightgowns I picked out. It’s pink with ruffles and has a picture of some princess on the front. She is rummaging through her bag, until she finds what she is looking for.