The Sweet By and By

by Sara Evans

  His confession smashed her last clump of doubt. Except . . . “Dustin, I want everything you just said, but what about waiting until you’re eighteen?” She couldn’t help it; she had to make sure, hear his confidence one last time. “Your parents won’t be able to stop you, and I’ll be seventeen a few months later. I’m sure by then Mama would give me permission or tell Granny to sign for me.”

  “No, Jade, no.” Dustin gestured toward the house. “We’re here now. We’ve thought about it, planned it. Come on”—he tugged her toward the porch— “trust me. The JP’s waiting.”

  The porch light flicked off, on, off, on. “Tick tock, kids, let’s go. Game time.”

  “Jade?”

  In the small span of space between them, she could feel Dustin’s heart beating. “Yes, let’s go.” She threw her arms around him. “We’re getting married.”

  For the first time since Todd Barlow fired shots into the night, calling out her daddy, Jade Fitzgerald was completely safe.

  After the JP made it official, Stu and Rachel treated the newlyweds to dinner at Maid Rite in Newton. It was out of the way, but everyone agreed it was the perfect reception location.

  Rachel raised her pop in a toast. “To Dustin and Jade. Many years of love and happiness. May we be so lucky, Stu.”

  “If only you were as sweet as Jade.”

  “What? I am sweet—”

  “Like a sweet tart.” Stu grinned and bumped her with his shoulder.

  “You’re so mean. To Dustin and Jade.” The four thunked their glasses together.

  “Forever.” From the moment Dustin pledged to love her until death— forever—his love removed all shadows from Jade’s consciousness.

  Peeking at her hand in her lap, she twisted the Irish claddagh ring he’d slipped on her finger. He wore an identical one on his hand. One day, when he had more money, he promised her a diamond.

  Eating baskets of loose seasoned-beef sandwiches and fries, loving the feel of Dustin’s hand on her leg, Jade laughed at Rachel and Stu. They argued about everything—when and if they would ever get married, who would drive Stu’s car home tonight, who had the best grades, who knew more funny lines from Seinfeld.

  When Dustin moved closer, running his hand up and down Jade’s thigh until she thought she’d go crazy, Rachel and Stu didn’t seem so entertaining.

  Finally, Stu went to pay the check and Rachel ducked into the ladies’ room, leaving Dustin and Jade alone. He nuzzled her ear. “You’re my wife. Mrs. Dustin Colter.”

  Chills swirled over her skin. “You’re my husband.”

  “I appreciate Stu and Rachel, but I wish we’d turned them down.” He ran his hand around the back of her neck. “We’d be on our honeymoon now if we’d gone on.”

  “Ah, come on, this is our reception.” Laughing, she kissed his cheeks. “You only get married once.”

  “Once. Just once.”

  In the parking lot, the friends gathered in twos. Dustin and Stu by the tailgate, Jade and Rachel by the passenger door. Chitchatting.

  Rachel grabbed Jade in a hug. “Are you nervous?”

  “A little,” she whispered. “It’s not like we—”

  “Right, right.” Rachel gripped her shoulders. “Relax, he loves you.”

  “I’m counting on it.”

  “Ready?” Dustin unlocked the passenger side door and held it open for Jade.

  She hopped inside. “Remember, Rach, if Granny calls—”

  “You didn’t feel good and went to bed early. Oh, wait—” Rachel ran to Stu’s car. “I want pictures.”

  Stu groused while Rachel posed everyone, setting the timer so she could duck into the shot. Then she posed Dustin and Jade, Dustin with Stu, and finally handed the camera to Stu. “Take one of me and Jade, and it best be in focus.”

  He clicked the shutter without checking the view finder.

  “All right, one last shot of the happy couple.” Rachel aimed the camera just as Dustin scooped up Jade in his arms. Laughing, she tossed her head back and flung her arms wide.

  The camera clicked.

  “That’ll be one to hang on the wall, show your grandkids.”

  Stu was shoving Rachel toward the Camaro.

  “Bye, you guys. Have fun.”

  By the time Dustin fired up the truck, Stu had powered out of the parking lot, his red taillights slicing the darkness. Shifting into gear and slowly backing out, Dustin peered at Jade, grinning, a lock of his brown hair dipping over his forehead. “How are you?”

  “I’m good, really good.” She slid under his arm as he steered down the road. “It was a lovely wedding, wasn’t it?”

  “Perfect in my book. Stu paid for dinner, and in the eight years I’ve known him, I’ve never seen him pay anything for anyone.”

  “Love has strange powers.” Jade set her head on his shoulder, a small cloud of regret threatening her sunshine. “Dust, I feel sort of bad that we lied, though.”

  “Yeah.” He rubbed her arm, braking as the car in front of him turned right.

  “It’s the downside, but nothing can change my mind. Tonight was right, Jade.”

  She kissed his jawline. “I love you.”

  Driving west, Dustin announced he’d committed one more little indiscretion. “I used Dad’s credit card to book a room at the Des Moines Hilton. But I’ll pay cash when we leave, so no sneaking anything from the mini bar, just in case.”

  “The Hilton, hey, big spender.” Jade was glad Rachel had talked her into buying something special to wear for the evening.

  “Getting married by the JP was fine by me, but I thought we’d want to remember a nice, fancy wedding night.”

  “Do you think the room will have one of those Jacuzzi bathtubs?”

  He wiggled his eyebrows at her. “Why don’t you just sit back and enjoy the drive, Mrs. Colter?”

  “As soon as you turn eighteen and we tell our parents, I’m changing my name.”

  “Until then, it’s our little secret.”

  Driving with one hand, holding her with the other, Dustin stole kisses as they sped along I-80, both of them singing to the radio this time, laughing.

  Jade repainted the evening’s details as they came to mind, hanging the vivid memories on the walls of her heart. The color of Dustin’s shirt, the feel of his hand resting on her back as they stood before the JP, the wash of emotion when he said, “I now pronounce you husband and wife,” and the scent of sweet corn and honeysuckle that hit her when they ran out of the house, married. Dustin had picked her up and whirled her around, head back, shouting to the stars.

  If she loved him any more, her heart would burst.

  Dustin swerved into a CVS parking lot on the edge of the city. “I’ll be back,” he said with a kiss, leaving the truck motor running.

  “Where are you going?”

  “To get stuff, you know”—he bobbed his head from side to side—“for tonight.”

  Her eyes widened, and she ducked into the shadow of the store light. “Oh, yeah, right.”

  At the drugstore door, Dustin looked back at her. Snickering, Jade slumped down against the seat and watched him. A few minutes later, he tossed a small paper bag into the truck like it was on fire. “Next time, you’re going in with me.”

  “Oh, no, I’m not.” Jade peeked inside the bag. Lotion too? She had a lot to learn.

  “Yes, you are. I felt like a perv.”

  “Fine, then you go in with me when I buy tampons.”

  He fired up the truck. “Man, married life is already complicated.”

  “Wimp.” She fell into him with her kiss.

  When she lifted her face, he pressed his hands over her hair and down her back. “This is forever, Mrs. Colter. You and me.”

  “Forever and a day.”

  Eighteen

  The music of the merry-go-round faded as Jade finished her story. Max sat forward, staring at the painted rump of the horse pulling their sleigh, the sleeves of his blue dress shirt straining against his arms.


  Rubbing the fingernail imprints from the palms of her hands, Jade watched Mr. Hannity weave his way through the horses toward them.

  “Must have been some conversation. Y’all rode for almost thirty minutes. Listen, I can fire her up for another go-round, but after that, I’m taking my dinner break.”

  “Thanks, Mr. Hannity, we’re fine. Please, take your break.”

  “Suit yourselves. You can sit as long as you need, but I’m shutting down the lights.”

  Sitting on the motionless, dark merry-go-round, Jade waited for Max to speak. In the park oval, after-work joggers kicked fallen leaves from the cement walks.

  “Aren’t you going to say anything?” Jade said, breaking the silence.

  “Just processing.”

  Let him be. The memory of that night had burned through Jade’s heart and leaked emotion through her words.

  Max stood after a second, exiting the sleigh. “It bothers me, Jade. I don’t want it to, but when you were telling what happened—”

  “I don’t love him.”

  “Sure felt like you did.” Max stepped off the ride.

  “I don’t, Max. Believe me.” Jade followed, standing next to him on the walkway. “I haven’t seen him in thirteen years.”

  “You’re married to him, Jade. Your first love. Most people never forget their first love. I’ve seen it . . . in the practice. People divorcing after ten, twenty years of marriage because they ran into their first love at a high school reunion.” He stared toward the green oval instead of at her. The wind looped his caramel-colored tie over his shoulder. “Being married to him has surely added a layer of emotional complication.”

  “He may have been my first love, Max, but he destroyed my heart.” The word destroy sounded like an exaggeration, but she was desperate for him to hear how much she didn’t love Dustin Colter. “What about those cases you’ve seen where love is lost because one spouse obliterated the trust of the other?”

  “I’ve seen it, but”—he shook his head—“it’s not entirely the same.”

  “No, it’s worse. If love and marriage were so binding, people would never divorce. Haven’t you seen cases where high school marriages ended in hate and disgust?” Jade closed her eyes, exhaling. Believe me. “Until I met you, I didn’t want to fall in love again. No man was worth my heart. I didn’t believe in happily ever after.”

  In a quick, jerky move, he snatched her to him, roping her into his arms. “I can’t stand the thought of you loving someone else who hurt you so bad, Jade. I don’t know what he did to you, but I don’t like him. Not at all.”

  “That makes two of us. It’s you and only you for me, Max. This is why the past is the past. It never happened. It doesn’t matter.” She tipped her face to see his.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Oh, Max, so very sure. But what about you? Do you think about Rice? You were engaged.”

  “No, but sometimes I think about the first woman I ever truly loved.”

  “Oh?” Jade took a step back, gauging his tone and expression. She couldn’t ask, not really, if the past was the past.

  “And the best part?” Max brushed her hair aside, kissed her temple, and enveloped her in his embrace. “She’s standing in my arms right now.”

  Nineteen

  Prairie City, November 1996

  Long shadows crept across the living room from the south-facing windows. Curled on the couch, Jade surfed afternoon programs, her thumb rapid on the remote’s channel button.

  Eighty channels and nothing decent on. She tossed the remote to the end of the sofa. Willow had some program she watched at five thirty anyway.

  Granny had dropped her off after picking her up from the babysitter and before making a run to the market, and asked if Jade was going to be home for dinner. She wanted to know how much chicken to pick up.

  No, Gran, Dustin was picking her up after football practice. Restless, Jade picked up the JC Penney catalog on the end table. Flipping through the pages, she paused at the ones Willow had already marked for Christmas.

  “What are you doing?” Willow bolted into the room with a pageant of Barbies in her hand. Mama brought her a new one every time she and Gig stopped by on their way to another show.

  “Waiting for Dustin.”

  “He’s late again, ain’t he?” Willow dropped to the floor and started lining up her dolls.

  “Isn’t he. No.”

  “You can watch Mary Kate and Ashley with me and the Barbies. Shh, Miranda, you can’t talk during the show.” Her finger to her lips, Willow bent toward one of the dolls. Then she aimed the remote and clicked on the television.

  “Who do you like best? Mary Kate or Ashley?”

  Willow shrugged. “They both leave something to be desired, but they’re good entertainment.”

  Jade laughed. “Where’d you hear that?”

  “Read it in People.”

  “Does Granny know you’re sneaking into her magazine stash?” Jade brushed her hand over the girl’s long, tangled hair before rising from the sofa and grabbing her jacket from the hook by the door.

  Walking out to the porch, she leaned against the post. The scene before her had changed since Dustin picked her up in June and carried her away.

  Summer green had given way to fall gray. The forecast predicted snow tonight. She and Dustin were going to build a fire in his parents’ basement— his parents always turned in early—and watch a video.

  A tingle tightened her skin. Living apart, keeping their marriage a secret, made the relationship both exciting and frustrating.

  It was hard to be with him and then have to stir herself to go home. Especially now that the weather was growing colder and snuggling was more fun. But Granny’s curfew was nonnegotiable. Even Mama couldn’t override her.

  Mr. and Mrs. Colter had a different approach with Dustin. They’d just say, “Don’t stay out late, son.”

  After five months Jade had zero regrets about marrying him. If possible, she loved him more every day, but . . .

  They had their trials—Dustin getting distracted by football and the guys, and the Northern Iowa University recruiter who offered him a wrestling scholarship.

  Even now, the idea of him going away to college muted all the colors in Jade’s world. When he proposed and they talked through their plans, he’d promised to wait a year for her. He’d work at the plant and on the farm with his dad, then they’d go to college together. She’d spent hours researching married housing and off-campus rentals.

  Then there was the week his dad grounded him for back-talking his mom— no truck, no phone, no visitors. That was a long, hard week, but Dustin spent the entire time planning their reunion.

  The memory made Jade smile.

  So they’d weathered a few storms and were stronger for it. Then last night, during a gin rummy match with Aiden—

  The screen door clapped, and Jade looked down to see Willow hanging over the porch rail next to her. “Those twins are insipid.”

  “Willow, do you know what insipid means?”

  “No, but I like saying it. Insipid, insipid.”

  “Better not let Granny catch you out here without your jacket. Oh, look, is that her car?”

  Willow was a dirty-blonde blur. Her feet thudded. The door slammed. When she returned, her jacket was zipped to her chin and her hood rode low over her forehead.

  “I don’t see Granny’s car.”

  “Hm, must have been one that looked like hers.”

  Willow stuck her feet through the porch rungs, bending her waist over the rail, eyes toward the road. “I’m waiting for Aiden. He’s taking me to church tonight.”

  “Is he?”

  “They give kids cookies and Kool-Aid.”

  “I bet.”

  Aiden attended church with his girlfriend’s family. A few months ago he got baptized. Jade went to witness with Dustin, Willow, and Granny. When Aiden disappeared under the water, Jade touched her praying hands medallion as her belly did a f
ree fall with hot tears chasing. Next to her, Granny cried, covering her nose with a tissue, and Willow pestered Dustin about how long Aiden could hold his breath underwater without croaking.

  When the pastor lifted Aiden from the water, declaring all his sins buried with Christ, a lump formed in Jade’s chest. Her brother looked different, his simple happiness boosted by a spiritual experience.

  She’d leaned against Dustin. Aiden had Jesus, and she had her husband.

  “What else do they do at church?” she asked Willow.

  Willow spotted a fleeing spider on the porch rail and puffed it over the side. “Talk about Jesus.”

  “Yeah? Do you like Him?”

  “He seems like a good guy. I’d like to spit in the dirt and stick mud in someone’s eyes too.”

  “And who might that be? Billy Spangler?”

  “Yeah,” Willow said low, out the corner of her mouth, cheek against her palm. Billy taunted Willow regularly. So much that Granny had to call the school. “But I’d have to poke his eye out first.”

  Jade swung her up in a hug and sat with her on the porch swing. “You just tell Billy when you’re grown up and drop-dead gorgeous, he’ll be sorry.”

  Willow frowned, leaning against Jade. “I want him to be sorry now.”

  “Yeah, well, me too.” Jade pushed her toe against the porch and set the swing in motion. “But trust me, it’ll mean way more when he’s sixteen and you won’t give him the time of day. By the way, what time is it?”

  “I’ll go see.” Willow hopped down, running inside. “You want a snack, Jade?”

  “Just the time, please.” Riding the swing back and forth, she surveyed the road. Football practice ended at five-thirty. She expected to see Dustin’s blue truck coming around the bend any time now. Jade gathered her jacket around her. Cold anticipation prickled up her arms and down her legs as her mind upped the volume on last-night’s conversation with Aiden.

  “So, what do you think of Dustin’s news? Northern Iowa is not that far. I think Paps’ truck could make the trip without falling apart.”

  “What are you talking about? He’s not taking the scholarship . . . He’s going to work for a year, then go to college with me.”