He rubbed his eyes with his hand then pinched the bridge of his nose. “She couldn’t drive home.”
“But why was she there?” Colby’s tone was filled with the same accusation I felt. He saw Mason kissing me yesterday. He knew how wrong this was.
John glanced my way and cleared his throat. Knowing him, he probably didn’t think it was an appropriate conversation to have in front of me. “Just don’t be bringing girls here in the future.”
Mason tensed and slowly took in everyone standing in front of him. Colby with his jaw locked and posture tense. John, who looked annoyed and embarrassed. And Owen, who looked like he was going to be sick. Poor kid knew something had happened between Mason and me. He even tried to watch out for me in his own way. Yet here we were. The idiot girl and Mason living up to exactly who they thought he’d be.
I should have known when Colby didn’t like the idea of Mason and me that he probably had good reason to feel that way. And with the way girls were always flirting with him…I was stupid to think he wouldn’t act on it had I not been around.
Just like Brody.
My lip trembled, and I clamped it in my teeth.
Mason looked back at John, sighed and said, “I won’t.”
My heart shattered.
At least he was owning up to it.
With one quick nod, John said, “Get cleaned up and meet us for breakfast.” He turned and walked away.
Owen glanced between everyone then hurried after his dad, but Colby didn’t budge.
As soon as John had stepped out of earshot, Colby stared down Mason and said, “You’re a fucking asshole.” Then he spun away.
Mason reached for my hand, but I jerked away from him.
“Don’t fucking touch me.” Then I took off in the same direction as the guys.
“Felicity, please…”
But I’d put enough distance to drown him out. Colby waited by the door of the restaurant for me.
“I’m sorry.” He looked almost as upset as I felt.
I shook my head. “You did nothing wrong.”
“I shouldn’t have invited him last night. If he hadn’t—”
“Stop. He made that choice. Regardless of what led to that decision, it was still his decision.” I pressed my hand to my stomach then pulled open the door. “I need to get to work.”
“Felicity.” Colby placed his hand on my shoulder, and I glanced back. “Are you going to be okay?”
I shook my head. “No.”
Eddie, the restaurant owner, greeted me at the door with a coffeepot in one hand and a towel in the other. “Glad to see you weren’t at the bonfire.”
Still reeling over what had happened, my brain couldn’t process what in the world he was talking about. “Bonfire?”
“We’ve had three call-ins this morning. Claiming they’re under the weather. I may be old but I hear what goes on. Everyone was going to that big bonfire on the beach. No one’s sick. Just suffering from a hangover and a bit of self-loathing.”
Was that where Mason had been last night? He didn’t look hungover. I wasn’t even too sure about the self-loathing. Maybe just a little regret over getting caught.
“Needless to say it’s only you for now, but I’m going to see who we can get to cover their shifts.”
Of all the shitty luck, on all the shitty days.
Eddie paused, tossed the towel over his shoulder and tilted his head to study me. “You okay, kid?”
I nodded. I was so not okay but forced a smile, anyway. “I’m half-awake. Maybe I can get a cup of that coffee? I’ve got a restaurant of people waiting on me.”
He smiled. “I’ll leave you a cup at the hostess stand. John just came in and requested you, which is good since you’re all we got.” He patted my back. “Table nine. Then make a quick round to see if any other tables need anything.”
With no other choice, I headed over to John’s table. Hopefully, Mason would have the decency to not show up.
When I walked up, John made some quick rambling apology about me seeing “family business,” which really only dug the knife in deeper. I’d never make it through my shift if I didn’t shut my brain off. Especially since the thought of Mason with some other girl—right next door to me—made me want to throw up.
“Don’t worry about it,” I mumbled then filled his coffee mug and took drink orders for Colby and Owen.
Colby ordered juice while looking somewhere between pissed and sympathetic, whereas Owen could barely make eye contact with me as he asked for water. The feeling was mutual. I wanted to hide my head in shame like some pathetic girl who’d fallen for the guy her friends had tried to warn her about. But it was my own fault. First rule of Summer Boys: Never get attached. I broke my rule; time to suffer the consequences.
The breakfast crowd was slowly growing, and there was no way I’d keep up like this. I forced my attention on the glasses filled with ice. I could buy some time if I dropped a glass of water off at the tables I hadn’t waited on yet. Then I’d send Eddie around with coffee. If they at least had something to start on, they may not get as frustrated with the slow service.
“Felicity.”
My whole body tensed as Mason’s voice slipped around me. I was filled with so much anger and disgust I wanted to burst.
When I didn’t acknowledge him, he went on, “Listen to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. I’m not your girlfriend. You are entitled to do whomever you want.” I grabbed the drink tray and tried to walk away, but he stopped me again.
“It’s not what you think.”
“What I think is there was a drunk girl passed out at your place last night. What I saw is her leaving your cabin this morning.” I finally turned and glared at him. “Now, tell me that’s not what I saw. Tell me what I think is wrong.”
“You’re not wr—”
“Then we’re done.” I spun and walked away.
I set the drinks on the tables then rushed to the bathroom and broke down. Tears streamed down my face, which only made me angrier. The pain igniting memories I’d tried to bury. And no matter how hard I fought them, my mind returned to the last time I pushed a guy away for his own good. Though I hadn’t pushed Mason away. I’d needed time to think, to avoid impulse and make sure our relationship grew the right way. Rushing these things wouldn’t make it better. I understood that, and thought he had too. But did he feel differently about me when he left with Colby last night? Did he feel as if I’d turned him away one too many times and got tired of waiting?
No. I couldn’t blame myself. This guilt wasn’t mine to carry. I’d carried Brody’s for too long; I couldn’t do it again. Regardless of my actions, I didn’t force Mason into that girl’s arms. He made that choice.
But God, why did he make that choice?
More tears trickled down my face, and I yanked out my phone to call Isla.
“Hey,” she answered. “I know you’re slammed and I’m on my wa—”
“A girl spent the night at Mason’s and it wasn’t me,” I blurted.
“What?” Isla practically screamed into the phone. “How do you know?”
“I saw her leaving his place. We all did.” I told her the story and how Mason had totally owned up to it in front of John, but was now trying to convince me otherwise.
“What a piece of shit. I’m so sorry, Felicity. Damn. This sucks.” She sighed. “I don’t know what to say. I’m almost there though. I can take their table for you.”
I sniffled again and patted my eyes with a paper towel. “Thanks.”
“See you in a minute.”
“ ’Kay.” I hung up and shoved my phone in my back pocket. Then splashed some water on my cheeks to try and hide the redness. Once I looked slightly decent again, I headed back out. Isla greeted me near the kitchen.
“I’m here.” She gave me a quick hug. “I’ll go check on John’s table, make up some excuse about you being busy. Don’t worry. We’ll get through this shift, then we’ll polish off a b
ottle of tequila.”
I half smiled, half frowned. “I don’t think either one of us is capable of polishing off a bottle of tequila.”
She shrugged. “We’ll at least put a dent in it.” Then with a reassuring smile, she marched off to where Colby sat with his dad, brother…and Mason, who stared right at me.
I turned away and busied myself on the other side of the restaurant. If I could keep moving, keep taking orders, keep serving food…I could avoid thinking. And that was my goal. I didn’t want to think about the blonde with the pixie cut. Or the wrinkles in her little yellow dress. I didn’t want to remember the look in Mason’s eyes when he saw me standing there. Or late last night, when a shadow danced past the window right before the room went dark.
My stomach knotted again, and I pressed my nails into my palms, hoping that the pain would take my mind off the thoughts swirling through my head.
Before he left, Mason tried to approach me once more, but I slipped past him and into the kitchen where he couldn’t follow. He then proceeded to blow up my phone with texts, forcing me to turn it off.
At the end of my shift, I headed over to Isla’s place, knowing if I went home, Mason would try to talk to me.
Isla’s grandma cooked us an authentic Mexican dinner then told us if we wanted to drink tequila, we might as well do so in a proper margarita. She dumped our cheap mixer down the drain and made a pitcher of margaritas from scratch.
She listened to my gripes, refilled my drink and then made me a bed on her couch. I loved Isla’s grandma almost as much as I loved Isla.
Chapter 20
Felicity
Still on a mission to avoid Mason, I decided it was time to visit my own family. With Charity and her kids there, I knew it would be the perfect place to avoid thinking.
After double-checking his boat was gone, I went to my place and grabbed my laundry so dropping by unannounced wouldn’t seem too suspicious. I was always welcome, but considering I rarely went home unless I had laundry to do or Mom had asked me to stop by, they’d suspect something was wrong. And I still couldn’t think about what Mason had done without getting upset. I didn’t need my parents in my relationship business. I’d gone down that road with Brody, and had no plans of doing that again.
My parents lived near the bay, in a small neighborhood that had been around longer than I had. Not much had changed over the last nineteen years, and while I’d been living there it always bothered me. Our entire cul-de-sac seemed so lifeless and dull, but now I found comfort in the familiarity. Which I guess was what probably drew my parents in at one time. It was a cozy place to raise a family, and now grandkids. I pulled into the driveway behind my mom’s silver car and grabbed my laundry from the backseat.
With my bag slung over my shoulder, I opened the front door and was greeted by my nephew Max and a light saber. He paused, stared at me then grinned.
“Aunt Felicity is here,” he yelled.
I winced. Man, that kid had a set of lungs.
Mom walked around from the kitchen and smiled. “Hey, honey, I didn’t know you were coming by. I was fixing dinner and would have made something vegetarian had I known.”
“It’s okay. I can eat whatever.”
My mom gave me a look that seemed to say “yeah, right,” then smiled. “Okay. Dinner will be ready in twenty minutes or so. The washer is empty if you want to get started on your clothes.”
“Thanks.” I stepped into the living room and skidded to a stop as a naked, wet toddler zoomed past, followed by my very exasperated-looking sister.
“No one wants to see your bum, Emma.” Charity waved pajamas in the air. “Come get dressed.”
“Bum,” Emma repeated with a giggle, then she went racing into the kitchen and to the safety of Grandma.
And I was home.
“Hey, Felicity.” My sister sighed. “Feel like wrestling a naked toddler into some clothes?”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
She tossed me the pajamas, and I headed into the kitchen. “Emma, come say hi to Aunt Felicity.”
“Aunt Fe.” She came bounding around the corner and jumped into my arms.
I snuggled into her, loving the smell of baby and lavender. “I missed my little Emma.”
She pressed her hand to my cheek and smiled.
“And clothes are a bit overrated, but last I checked, you weren’t potty trained. So let’s at least get a diaper on your bum.”
Emma giggled again and said, “Bum.”
—
After dinner, I helped Charity get the kids to bed…in my old room. Then helped clean the kitchen.
“So besides laundry, what brings you home?” Charity glanced at me from the sink.
My sisters had always been able to read me too well. Especially Charity, probably because she was the oldest and had been almost ten when I was born. She’d been there through all my firsts and remembered details of my life better than even I did.
I closed the dishwasher and sighed.
She tossed the towel on the counter and motioned for me to follow. “Let’s go talk in my room.”
As we headed through the living room where my parents were watching TV, Charity said, “Felicity promised to take pictures of the kids tomorrow. Since the morning is when they are most cooperative, she’s going to stay the night.”
Mom smiled. “Oh, that’s great. We need some new pictures of Emma and Max.”
Dad was too zoned out to even register the conversation taking place around him, so Mom nudged him.
“Did you hear? Felicity is staying the night.”
He blinked then looked at me. “Good. I hate you being on that boat alone. You need to move home.”
I rolled my eyes. “I like the boat, Dad.”
“I know, but I worry about you.”
I kissed the top of his head. “Don’t worry. Eddie keeps an eye on me.”
“I know, and I need to stop by the restaurant and thank him.” The commercial break ended, and his attention went back to the TV.
Once in her room, Charity shut the door behind me and plopped down on the bed.
“So how did you know?” I asked.
“Know what?” She lay down, looking totally worn out.
“That I needed to stay the night.”
“Because you came home. It’s what we do when life gets too complicated.” She patted the mattress.
I settled next to her and rolled onto my side. “Is that what you did?”
Her smile held no real happiness. “Yeah. But that’s a story for another day. Tell me what’s going on with you.”
“A boy.”
“Isn’t it always? So what did this boy do?”
“A girl who wasn’t me.”
“Ouch.” She rubbed her hand over my hair. She’d always loved my curls, and I’d always been envious of her straight hair. “Do you like this boy a lot?”
“I thought I did.” But that wasn’t the truth. I still did. It just hurt too much to admit.
“Can you forgive him? Or do you even want to?”
“Thing is, we aren’t a couple so I really can’t be mad at him. I think I’m more sad than anything. I thought he liked me the way I liked him. And if he did, he’d never sleep with another girl. He wouldn’t want to.”
“Boys don’t always listen to the head that matters.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Do you think this situation is bringing up some Brody memories, and that’s what’s making this harder?”
The truth was Mason sleeping with this girl had stirred difficult memories. Like the realization that what we had wasn’t special. That he could find intimacy with any girl, not just me. “I think so. It hurts, and I really don’t know what to think. I kind of don’t want to.”
“Maybe you should talk to him, and see what he has to say for himself.”
“I could, but in reality, this whole relationship is temporary. He’s only here for the summer, and I already feel myself getting too attached t
o him. Once he’s gone, who knows how many other girls there will be? Now’s probably a good time to get a clean break.”
“But nothing about what you told me sounds like a clean break. You sound upset and full of questions. If you don’t sort it out, you may always wonder.”
I shrugged. “Everything happens for a reason, and I think this was a wake-up call. It never would have worked anyway, so why get my hopes up?”
Charity sighed and twisted one of my curls around her finger. “When did sweet little Felicity get so jaded?”
“I’m not jaded.”
She raised an eyebrow.
“I’m not.” I sounded defensive, which basically confirmed that I was. Dammit. “Look, maybe this is what he wanted too. The night it happened I’d told him I liked him, and then he goes and brings a girl home knowing full and well I live next door.”
“He lives next door? Like on a boat?”
“John’s boat. He’s Colby’s cousin.”
Her expression twisted, then she sighed. “Well, that’s all sorts of complicated there.”
“No kidding.” I rolled onto my back. “Now tell me he really didn’t think he’d get caught. As far as I know, he wanted to.”
“If that is true, I’m sorry.” She reached down and gave my hand a squeeze. “That really sucks.”
It more than sucked. It was heartbreaking.
—
The next morning, I faded into the background with my camera in hand, while Max and Emma played. They were my favorite subjects, but it was pointless to pose them. Nothing compared to the smiles that graced their little mouths when they were set loose and allowed to be kids.
I’d already snapped probably close to a hundred shots, and I wasn’t done. I loved taking pictures of them.
“So you planning on staying here again tonight?” Charity asked as she handed me a bottle of water.
I nodded. “Just one more night.”
“You might get Mom and Dad’s hopes up that you are moving home.” She grinned.
Just a Little Kiss Page 17