by Grey, R. S.
He points to the row of them on my desk. “Shouldn’t matter. You have quite a few.”
“Elise told me they’ll help align the points of energy in my body. Don’t touch that purple one unless you’re ready to become a father. Apparently, it helps with fertility.”
He takes a healthy step away from it, and I laugh.
“I’m kidding. I don’t know what any of them are supposed to do. They look like dust collectors to me, but don’t tell Elise that.”
He zips his lips then nods his head in the direction of the elevators.
“I came down to invite you to lunch, but it looks like you already have it taken care of.”
I glance down at my arugula salad covered in spindly alfalfa sprouts. No dressing, extra raw beets—just the way Elise eats it. She took the liberty of ordering it for me along with her lunch, and she stood there until I took my first bite.
“Yum,” I said, swallowing down a whole hunk of fibrous greens and trying to keep a straight face.
Without another thought, I reach for my purse hanging on the back of my chair and wave for Dan to lead the way. “Let’s go quick. Here, shove that salad in your pants so there’s no evidence of it left behind.”
He laughs and tucks the closed container under his arm, and then we make a run for it toward the elevators.
“How long do you have left on your lunch break?” he asks.
“Thirty minutes, and then Elise wants me to sit in on a meeting with her, so we have to be fast.”
I’m hustling as if I’m on the lam. I can’t help it. I know I’ll be putting real food in my mouth soon, and my salivary glands are already rearing into action.
“Do you like Philly cheesesteaks?” I ask Dan as we hop onto the elevator.
“Can’t say I’ve ever had one.”
I slap a hand over my chest like I’m deeply offended. “Today, we fix that. Prepare to have your mind blown.”
Way South Philly Deli is where Aiden and I eat when we want comfort food. It’s one of our favorite spots, and I’m not surprised to see there’s a line out the door when Dan and I arrive.
“It moves fast,” I assure him as we take our place at the end.
Up ahead, a head of black hair catches my attention, and I sidestep out of line to confirm it’s who I think it is. With a laugh, I shake my head. Of course he’d come on the same day as me. Like girls with synced periods, Aiden and I have matching food cravings.
I’m about to shout his name when I see him turn to talk to a petite blonde. He holds up his phone to show her something, and my stomach sinks like it’s filled with a hundred stones. I watch in what feels like slow motion as she tilts her face up to look at him. The midday sun radiates through her hair, sprinkling light through the strands.
“Do you know someone up ahead?” Dan asks, having caught on to the fact that I’m staring straight at Aiden and the girl.
“Oh.” I shake my head and step back into line beside him. “I’m not sure. I thought they looked familiar.”
I want to bolt and run back to Zilker Creative, but instead, I begrudgingly shuffle forward. A dark cloud has settled over me as I peer up at Aiden and the girl again. They’re only a few people ahead of us. I can hear his laugh, and though his words aren’t clear, I’d know his voice anywhere.
“So how are you enjoying your new digs?”
“Digs?” I ask, confused.
“Your new desk—I saw that Elise forced you to move.”
Dan is doing all the heavy lifting in our conversation. I try to block out Aiden and force my attention back to Dan, but it’s like trying to ignore the blare of a bullet train barreling right for you.
The way the line at the deli works, it winds back on itself once you get inside. I know Aiden and I will cross paths. I know I will have to put on a brave face and get introduced to yet another girl. I’ve done it before, lots of times, so I don’t know why today it feels like too great a burden.
Thinking fast, I grab a menu from the wall and hold it up a few inches away from my face at an unnatural angle. No one reads a menu like this. It’s like I have the eyesight of a bat.
“Line’s moving,” Dan tells me because I can’t see for myself.
I hold out my hand to feel blindly ahead of me, not wanting to lower the menu, and I end up accidentally colliding with the person in front of us. My attempt at anonymity is wrecked instantly because my manners insist that I apologize.
“Oh, I’m sorry! Did I get you there?”
At the sound of my voice, Aiden’s head whips in my direction.
I’ve been found out. We’re diagonal from one another, only a few feet apart.
“Maddie,” he says with a little laugh, as if not quite believing his luck.
“Aiden?! What are you doing here?!” I am so shocked, so flabbergasted that he could be here out of all the restaurants in the city that he immediately knows I’m acting.
I drop my menu back to my side and smile weakly.
“You guys know each other?” Dan asks, glancing between me and Aiden.
“Oh, yeah. This is…” My best friend, roommate, secret love of my life. “Aiden,” I supply limply.
“Hey man, I’m Dan. I work with Maddie at Zilker,” he says, politely stretching his hand in Aiden’s direction.
Aiden shakes it, nodding slowly as if trying to connect the dots and having a hard time doing it.
“And who’s your friend?” I ask, finally forcing myself to look at the girl. She has a nose piercing and tiny freckles. Her eyes are a hazy gray.
“Oh, hi. I’m Allison,” she says with a charming little wave.
“She’s the new intern at Texas Monthly,” Aiden volunteers.
“Aiden here is showing me the ropes,” she says with a big smile as she looks up at him. Admiration seeps from her gaze, and my stomach squeezes tight.
I should have left. I should have made up an excuse about irritable bowels and left Dan here to get lunch on his own. This was a mistake.
“Should we eat together?” Dan suggests.
Aiden and I both say no at the same time. Our eyes catch and unnamed emotions war between us. Why did he say no? I said no because I don’t want to endure another minute of Allison drooling all over him, but how dare he turn me down?!
“I have to get back pretty quickly,” I say with an apologetic shrug.
“Same here. Five o’clock deadline,” Aiden confirms.
The line moves forward and we’re side by side now. Aiden’s shoulder brushes mine and I look at him, unsure whether I’ve fully masked the emotions lurking just below the surface. How could you? I ask inside my head. How could you start dating another girl?
I’m not sure how much more fight I have left in me. Two years is a long time, longer than I thought I’d last living under the same roof as Aiden. In the beginning, when my crush was a tiny thing I could mostly ignore, it wasn’t so bad if I saw him with another girl. Now, that crush has ballooned to fill every chamber of my heart so that every beat reminds me he’s the one I want. He’s not supposed to date someone else. He’s supposed to be with me.
“See you at the condo?” he asks, reaching out to pick an invisible speck of lint off my shoulder.
“Elise might keep me late tonight.”
“I’ll wait up.”
“Aiden, we have that work thing,” Allison reminds him. “Cocktails at the Driskill, remember? You said you wouldn’t let me go by myself.”
Lovely! Swell! What a wonderful conversation we’ve all had! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go dunk my head in a toilet.
To save face, I look away and strike up a conversation with Dan, keeping my back to Aiden until I’m sure he and Allison have left the restaurant.
Chapter Five
Maddie
Knock, knock, knock.
Aiden’s at my bedroom door.
It’s Saturday morning. I’m still in bed, staring up at the ceiling wondering if a broken heart gets you put on the transplant list or n
ot. Maybe a whole new organ—one not imprinted upon by Aiden—would give me a fresh start.
When I don’t answer, he cracks the door open and peers in.
“Hey!” I say, turning my head on my pillow. “I could have been naked.”
“You’re not,” he says dryly, dragging his gaze down my chest covered in a cotton tank top then down to the blanket bunched at my waist.
“Well I could have been,” I point out.
“But…you’re not,” he says, half-smiling.
I sigh and look back up at the ceiling.
He steps into my room without a formal invitation and brings with him the smell of freshly brewed coffee. He sets the mug down for me on my bedside table then tells me to scoot over.
I do, and he doesn’t hesitate before lying down beside me on top of my blankets.
We stare up at the ceiling together, not talking. A foot apart.
I breathe in his freshly showered scent and try to keep a tear from rolling down my cheek.
I’m not sure how long we lie like that, close to each other. Not touching.
I count the blades of my fan. One, two…five…then I speak.
“How was last night?” I ask, still unable to look at him.
“Boring. I left pretty early.”
“What about Allison?”
I need to brace myself if she’s in our condo, in his bed, right now.
He sighs like the question exhausts him. “She’s just an intern. My boss made me volunteer to show her around.”
The tension in my stomach starts to unravel.
“So she’s not out there waiting for you?”
He sounds almost offended by the question when he replies. “No. Christ. I barely know her.”
I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
“Dan?” Aiden asks, and my eyes blink open again.
“He’s a friend.”
I see him nod in understanding out of the corner of my eye.
His hand scoots toward me on top of the blanket until his pinkie covers mine. I pretend not to notice, and then he starts to tap it against my nail, and when he starts to do that, he also starts to hum. I can’t pick up the tune at first. He’s not the most musically inclined, but after another few seconds, I smile and shake my head. He’s such a goof. It’s “Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol. He’s making fun of us.
I laugh, and the tension in the air breaks. I sit up, grab ahold of my blankets, and toss the entire bundle on top of him. Then I scurry off the bed and round the edge to grab my coffee so I can make my escape. Aiden playfully roars, and even though I know we’re just teasing, adrenaline still spikes my blood as if I’m really being chased. I should leave the coffee and bolt, but the smell is too irresistible and I overestimate my evading abilities. My hand barely comes in contact with the handle of the mug before Aiden reaches out, grabs me around the middle, and tosses me back onto my bed. The mug gets jostled but doesn’t spill, and I squeal in real fear as he takes me by surprise. My eyes are pinched closed as he hoists himself on top of me, grabs my wrists, and pins me down.
He’s won. Clearly.
I’m completely incapacitated.
I open my eyes and they collide with his. They’re green like moss. No, like dragon scales.
“Mercy” slips past my lips, but he doesn’t move.
His inky black hair hangs down across his forehead, a few strands covering his left eye as his hold tightens on my wrists.
“Aiden,” I say, and his name is like a spell, breaking him out of whatever reverie he was lost in. He pushes up and off me then walks out of the room.
“I’m going for a run,” he murmurs, and I sit on the edge of my bed, heart in my throat, tank top askew, wrists pink from Aiden’s grip.
* * *
Otoko is as exclusive and upscale as I expected it would be. It’s a tiny restaurant in South Congress Hotel and reservations are made three months in advance, but James called a friend of a friend and got us in for Saturday night. I’m wearing a short black dress and heels. I spent a while on my hair and makeup, knowing Jolie would expect it. Aiden looks dressy but relaxed in tailored trousers and a checkered button-down. He’s rolled up the sleeves and undone the top button. His short hair is styled back from his face with some pomade, the way he does it when he goes to work or somewhere he needs it to look semi-tamed.
When I walked out of my room earlier at the condo, he was already waiting for me in the kitchen. We took each other in slowly. Quietly. Eventually, I made a quip about him cleaning up nicely. He didn’t repay the compliment or anything, but I’m not surprised. He’s been quiet ever since this morning.
Jolie and James swung by to pick us up, and together, the four of us drove to the restaurant. We’re an odd pairing. James is in a suit and tie, Jolie in a floor-length maxi dress and huge diamond earrings. They look like they’re dining with royalty.
The restaurant only accommodates twelve guests at small tables dispersed around a streamlined room. The space is minimal. No heavy artwork or portraits on the walls, no lights dangling from the ceiling. We take our seats and then I excuse myself to use the restroom. I should have gone back at the condo, but I was running behind and felt bad keeping everyone waiting.
I curve around the tables and almost make it to the women’s bathroom when a hand shoots out and grabs my arm.
“Madison!?”
I look down to see Elise sitting with three other young women, all of whom are dressed as impeccably as she is in fitted dresses and designer jewelry. One of them is wearing layer upon layer of dainty gold necklaces around her neck, and I love the effect.
“Girls, Madison works with me at Zilker! Madison, sit sit. You have to eat with us.”
I smile and wave to her friends then nod back toward my table. “That’s sweet of you, but I’m already at a table over there.”
It doesn’t even occur to Elise that I might have come with people who expect me to sit with them.
She follows the direction of where I nodded and finds Aiden, Jolie, and James. Jolie is perusing the menu, and James is talking to a waiter. Aiden is facing us, looking over, wondering who I could possibly know here.
“Who is that?” Elise asks, obviously referring to Aiden.
Before I can reply, another one of her friends pipes up. “Who cares what his name is? I want to know if he’s single.”
“Obviously not,” another one replies. “Look at the way he’s watching Madison.”
“Are you together?” Elise asks me, still gripping my arm. “Because if not, you absolutely have to introduce me. I don’t mind younger men. In fact, I prefer it.”
Her friends all laugh and chime in, prodding me for an answer, and maybe it’s the way Elise is looking at Aiden, or maybe it’s the fact that I still have a jealous taste in my mouth from seeing him with Allison yesterday, but in the end, I lie.
“Oh yeah, that’s Aiden. We’re dating.”
My pulse immediately picks up. The second the words are spoken, I know it’s too late to take them back.
“You’re so lucky!” Elise’s friend gushes.
“What a cute couple!”
“You have to introduce us to him!”
What!? No. Absolutely not.
Though my bladder is the very last thing on my mind at the moment, I use it as a way to extract myself from Elise’s clutches.
I scrunch up my face and point to the bathroom. “Sorry, I was just headed there.”
“Oh!” She lets me go. “Of course you were. Sorry for keeping you. I’ll try to come over and meet your friends before we leave.”
Over my dead body.
I say goodbye to the group and scurry off, wishing I could splash some cold water on my face without ruining my makeup. I settle for a few deep breaths and that seems to help a little, right up until I walk out of the bathroom to see Aiden talking with Elise and her friends.
What?!
HOW did that happen so fast?
I hurry over, hoping they haven’t sa
id too much to him already.
“You two are so sweet together. What a perfect pair.”
CRAP.
“Oh!” Elise notices me. “There she is. Sorry, Maddie, we couldn’t wait. We called Aiden over to get his take on things. Don’t blame us for being nosy.”
I want to melt into the floor. I can’t even look in Aiden’s general direction. What in the world must he think right now?
“How long have you two been together?” one of Elise’s friends asks.
What follows is the longest silence ever recorded in modern times.
I think my bones turn to dust as I try to come up with an answer that appeases them while also not alerting Aiden to the fact that I’ve lied about us being a couple.
“What has it been?” Aiden asks. “Five months?”
My gaze jerks up to his as my lips part in shock.
“Oh! So it’s serious then?” one of them asks.
His mouth hitches into an easy smile. “Very.”
Elise and her friends all ooh and ahh over Aiden’s apparent infatuation with me, but I know from the look in his eye he’s only playing along for their benefit. When we’re alone, he’ll let me have it.
I gulp.
“We better get back to our table,” I say, hurrying to end this awkward exchange. “It looks like James and Jolie want to get started.”
“It was nice meeting you all,” Aiden supplies with a nod before reaching out to take my hand. “Maddie?”
I have no choice but to step forward and let him wrap his fingers around mine. It’s exactly what a boyfriend would do in this situation, and he’s playing his part to a T.
After a few steps, I try to wiggle free of his grasp, but he tightens his hold on me and tugs me toward him.
“So we’re dating?”
My cheeks are on fire.
“I’ll explain everything later.”
He chuckles under his breath and releases my hand before Jolie looks over at us. “I look forward to hearing it.”
All through dinner, Aiden is his normal charming self. He entertains us with stories from the field and doesn’t get offended when James pesters him with questions about his future and whether he’s putting enough away into savings to help build up his nest egg. It’s not until we get dropped off at the curb outside our building that Aiden turns to me, his smile unfurling as his eyes narrow into slits.