My heart sinks like a stone when I pull out the photos. I flick through them one by one, seeing Dean with a woman. I frown and squint as I look at the pictures more closely as my chest gets that horrible hollow feeling and my head starts to feel light. I know that woman! She’s the one who came to my work, the one who told me Dean wasn’t all he appeared to be.
My heart starts hammering against my ribcage and I flick through the photos again. I shake my head as I see images of Dean and the woman, laughing and kissing and smiling and all I can do is whisper no, no, no. I stuff the photos back inside the envelope and rush in the door. I barely glance at Jess as I hurry to my bedroom, closing the door behind me and falling down onto my bed.
The tears start stinging my eyes and I brush them away angrily.
Was she telling the truth? Was she trying to tell me that I shouldn’t trust him because he was cheating on me with her?
There’s that word—cheating. Even thinking it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. I thought I’d never feel this again, not after Ronnie. I thought I was done with it. I open the envelope and look at the photos again, more slowly this time. My vision starts to blur as the tears start streaming down my face and I shake my head.
“It can’t be true,” I whisper to myself. “It just can’t be true.”
My hands are trembling and my eyes are so full of tears that I can’t see anything anymore. I let them fall down my cheeks and I cover my face with my hands. His betrayal pierces me like a hot dagger through the heart. I sit on the edge of my bed and cry, my mouth open in a silent sob as I try to hide my pain from the rest of the house. I shake and shudder and wrap my arms around my stomach as my whole body crumples over. I rock back and forth and let the tears fall down my face.
I only realize I wasn’t being quiet at all when Jess appears by my side. Her arms are around me and she’s holding me against her chest, stroking my hair and cooing. I feel her reach over toward the photos and look at them before wrapping her arms around me a little bit tighter.
I want to tell her about Dean’s mother, and about the other woman, and Dean showing up last night. I want to tell her everything but she’s been so stressed and tired these days that it just seems selfish to burden her more. And now…
“Come on, Sam. There, there. Come on,” she coos. I sniffle and choke and sob until I feel empty again.
Finally, I’m able to look up at her. She shakes her head.
“What happened?”
“I don’t know! Dean’s mom threatened me and that woman warned me and now Dean is worried and he won’t talk to me and I’m pregnant and it’s all a big mess and I should have just stayed in Lexington.” I run out of breath and stop talking as I inhale. Jess’s face is a picture of complete confusion.
“Wait, what?”
I sob again and try to wipe my eyes. “I don’t know what to do, Jess.”
“Tell me what happened. Who gave you these pictures?”
I finally wipe the tears away and am able to see her a little bit more clearly. I take a deep breath and start talking.
40
Dean
When I walk into my father’s office it’s like nothing has happened. Everyone says hello to me as if I’ve been working there for the past two months. I’m led to the big corner office and I slump down in a chair with my head in my hand. My mother and father are looking at me expectantly. All I can do is nod. My mother claps her hands in front of her face.
“Good! That’s settled.”
She smiles at me and a shiver runs down my spine. My father’s face is impassable, so I just stare at the carpet in front of me.
With that nod, I’ve agreed to their terms. I feel empty. I feel numb. I’ve just agreed to break up with Sam and to marry Victoria.
It’s the only way to keep Sam safe. If I don’t do what they say, they’ll kidnap her exactly like me, except they won’t let her go. My heart sinks even more and I take a deep breath. I have to do this.
I keep telling myself that I have to do this over and over. Even so, I still shudder when I hear the clack-clack-clack of heels in the hallway and I see Victoria’s face turn the corner into the office. There’s a hint of panic inside me and I take a deep breath to calm myself.
I don’t know if I can do this.
I close my eyes for a moment and think of Sam. I see her smile and the way she was with the kids at the organization. I see the way she hops up excitedly when she’s really happy about something. I map her body in my mind, remembering every freckle, every curve, every bone and muscle in her body. I’m anchoring all those memories in my mind. I might never see her again.
When I open my eyes again, all three of them are staring at me. I turn to Victoria and shake my head.
“I get why they’re doing this,” I say, pointing to my parents. “They’ve been wanting to go into politics since before I was born. But you? What have you got to gain? Why are you doing this?”
She takes a step toward me and reaches her hand toward my face. I flinch away, not letting her fingertips touch my cheek. She grins.
“Poor, sweet, innocent Dean. You have no idea how rich you are, do you?”
“Is that what this is about? Money?”
“What else would it be about?” she snarls. “You think I’d actually want to be with you? Come on, Dean, grow up. You dress up like a fucking clown on the weekends.”
The words sting. I’ve always known that none of them understand why I do the children’s parties. I’ve always known that none of them have a generous bone in their bodies. But to have it thrown in my face like it’s something to be ashamed of?
Sam’s face appears in my head again. I see how happy she was when her boss agreed to let me give clown classes at the organization.
She gets it.
Not only does she get it, she lives it. Her whole life is dedicated to doing what I do for a couple hours a week: helping kids. She lives to give them just a bit of joy in any way she can.
“Right, so, the lawyer is almost done with the papers,” my mother says, taking a step toward us. “We’ll go to the courthouse tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow!” I exclaim, turning to my mother. She sighs and rolls her eyes at me.
“Did you think you’d have time to change your mind? Yes, tomorrow. You will be married and you will do as we say, or else that sweet girlfriend of yours will pay the price.”
I stare at my mother and feel something I’ve never felt before. I think it’s hatred. I look at her perfectly manicured nails, her made-up face and her impeccable hair and all I see is fakeness. All I see is lies.
Hatred feels different than anger. It’s stronger and calmer at the same time. My mother snarls and then relaxes. The heat of my hatred crawls down my spine and rests in the pit of my stomach. I can feel the blood pumping through my veins as my eyes swing from my mother to my father to my fiancée.
All three of them are completely relaxed, completely confident in their total victory over me. The blood pumps through my veins and my hatred curls from my stomach and expands in my chest. My father reclines in his chair and takes a deep breath that feels like a slap in the face. Victoria leans on the desk and my mother pats her hair down for the thousandth time.
I could scream. I could flip the whole desk over and smash this chair through the window. I could knock every book off the bookshelf and trash this entire office. I could go berserk and not calm down till the police came and tasered me.
I could, but I don’t.
I think of Sam, and I know I can’t. I think of Sam, and I know I have to stay here, sitting quietly, learning what true hatred feels like. I think of Sam, and I know that if I let go of her in my heart then that hatred will consume me.
I close my eyes and they start to fill with tears. I hear Sam’s voice and hear her laugh. I can just about smell that perfume that I came to love. I hang onto every detail that I can remember, hang onto it before I’m overcome by my own hatred.
A deep, raking breath brings me back
to the present. My father is saying something, and Victoria is looking at some papers of some sort. I should be listening, but it doesn’t matter. I’ll sign whatever they tell me to sign, I’ll do whatever they tell me to do as long as I know they won’t hurt Sam.
They have me where they want me, and there’s nothing I can do about it.
All three of them turn to the door and stand up when it opens. I don’t have the energy. I don’t care who’s there or what they have to say. It doesn’t matter.
It’s not until I take a deep breath that I smell the faintest hint of that floral perfume. My eyebrows draw together ever so slightly and something wakes up inside me. And then, like a breath of fresh air, she speaks.
“Hi, Dean.”
I turn around slowly and see her silhouetted in the doorway. She looks as fierce as a lion, standing tall as she faces my parents and Victoria. My voice is just a croak as I say the name that’s been on my lips for the past two months.
“Sam.”
41
Samantha
I can’t even look at Dean. I know if I look at him, my courage might falter and I won’t be able to do what I came here to do. I glance from Dean’s mother to her father to the woman, Victoria. I know her name now. My whole body is trembling but I keep my gaze steady and my lips in a tight, thin line.
“Mr. Shelby, Mrs. Shelby, Victoria,” I say slowly. “I was hoping to find at least one of you here.”
“What do you want?” Mrs. Shelby barks. “I told you to mind your business. Don’t you know Dean doesn’t want you anymore? He had his fun and now it’s over. Tell her, Dean!”
I force myself not to look at Dean. I keep my eyes steady on Victoria. Dean clears his throat.
“She’s... She’s right, Sam. It’s over.”
The words pierce my heart and the pain radiates through my chest but I still don’t look at him. It can’t be true. I hang on to Jess’s words and I squeeze my hands into fists. I keep my eyes on Victoria and pull out the envelope of pictures.
“Is this supposed to convince me?”
Dean makes a noise but I ignore him. Mrs. Shelby starts cackling.
“Don’t be so desperate, girl. You heard him. It’s over.”
“It’s only over because you said it was over,” I say, swinging my eyes over to her. She takes a step backward as if the force of my gaze is too much and I stand up ever so slightly taller. The tension in the air is thick and the room is completely silent except for my long, measured breaths. “Isn’t it?”
Dean’s mother spreads her stance and crosses her arms. She lifts her chin toward me and curls her lip into a snarl.
“So you’re not as stupid as I thought you were,” she barks. She cackles again and shakes her head, taking a step toward me. I stand my ground. “You don’t belong in this world. Dean had his fun but now it’s time for him to do his duty. Leave, and never come back, or else you know the consequences.”
I try not to shiver at her words and take another breath.
“I’ll leave, and I’ll never come back. I’ll never speak to Dean again,” I say, trying to make my voice ring true. “I just want to hear it from you. Tell me he’s with Victoria because you told him to be.”
This time Victoria speaks. She spits her words at me with such venom it takes all my strength not to take a step back.
“That’s right. He’s here because he belongs here. With our two families joined, nothing will be able to stop us. He’s a weak, pathetic man and if his parents weren’t so rich, I wouldn’t even let him take my order at a restaurant. But I’ll marry him and my family will carry his father’s political career straight to the top. And I’ll fuck whoever I want to fuck and crush his little heart over and over just because I can. So leave.”
I try not to flinch at her words. I take a deep breath, swinging my eyes back to his mother.
“Thank you,” I say slowly. “It’s nice to hear the truth.”
His mother laughs again. “The truth! The only truth is that our two families will run this city before the end of the year. Now get out.”
My whole body is shaking and I spin on my heels. I hurry out of the office, rushing to the elevators and mashing the buttons to go downstairs. Once they open in the lobby, Jess rushes toward me.
“Did you get it?” she asks, breathlessly. “Are you okay?”
“I knew it,” I say. “I fucking knew it. I knew those pictures had to be fake.”
I pull out my phone and replay the recording I took. Just like we tested earlier, their voices are clear and you can hear every word that was said in that room. We look at each other and grin. My heart is pounding against my chest and I play the recording again.
“There it is,” I breathe. “They admit it all. Threatening me, forcing him to get married, plotting to work together for politics. It’s all there.”
“Come on,” Jess says. “Let’s bury the bastards. Let’s go to the police.”
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I can still see Dean out of the corner of my eye, head in hand as he sits slumped in that chair. He looked completely defeated, and his voice was dead when he told me he didn’t want to see me. They have something over him, he was terrified. What would happen if I went to the police?
I shake my head. “We can’t. What would they charge them with? Harassment? They haven’t done anything wrong, not yet anyways. Nothing that we can prove. They have an army of lawyers and probably the police on their payroll. She got my divorce papers somehow, and she scared Dean into saying he didn’t care about me. I don’t know who they are, but they scare me. No, we can’t go to the police.”
“So what do you want to do? Sam, are you sure this is worth it? Maybe you should just let it go. Don’t tell him about the baby, do it on your own. I’ll help. Don’t put yourself in danger for this guy!”
Jess’s face is full of concern. She puts a hand to her cheek and shakes her head. I know what she’s saying, and I get it. I just don’t agree. I can’t let Dean go, I can’t turn my back on him and forget everything that’s gone on between us. I’ve never met a man so genuine, a man who cares about me so much and who shares the same passions as I do. I’ve never met someone who can be a billionaire and a children’s party clown on the same day. I’ve never met anyone who can make me laugh as easily or make me feel as good about myself.
I’ve never loved anyone like I love him. I can’t let him go. I won’t.
I look at the phone in my hand and take a deep breath. I know what I need to do. I need to beat them at their own game.
“What do you want to do, Sam?” Jess repeats.
I grin and pull out a business card I grabbed on the way out.
“Blackmail.”
42
Dean
My heart is broken. Shattered. There are a million shards of it floating inside me sending searing pain through my whole body.
Sam walked out the door and now I’m finished. I’m done. It’s over. My life is completely over. She heard the truth, and she accepted it. I glance from my father to my mother to Victoria and I feel nothing but disgust. Disgust and hatred.
My father lifts his eyes to me and I see nothing in them. No regret, no love, no care. Nothing but coldness.
“You three are sociopaths,” I finally say, shaking my head and leaning back in my chair. “You’re complete sociopaths. Or psychopaths. I don’t know the difference. You’re fucked up.”
“Oh shut up, Dean,” Victoria says as she rolls her eyes. She flicks her hair behind her shoulder and raises an eyebrow toward me. “It’s over.”
“I know it’s over, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re all fucking psychopaths.”
“Where were we?” My mother asks a bit too loudly. “Henry, let’s see the draft prenup agreement. Victoria, you’ve had a chance to review this?”
Victoria nods and my mother hands me the papers. I start scanning them and let out a gargled noise at the second page.
“A baby clause? You want her to ca
rry my child? You expect me to have sex with this fucking monster?” I say, waving the papers toward Victoria. “I agreed to marry her, I didn’t agree to sleep with her!”
“You’ll do what it says, Dean,” my father growls. My eyes flick back to him and I shake my head.
“I can’t. I can’t fuck her. I can’t even fucking look at her without dry heaving!”
“You never had a problem fucking me before,” Victoria snarls.
“Yeah well that was before you cheated on me, you conniving bitch.”
The vitriol in my voice surprises me. It’s not like me to talk like this, or to feel like this. I’ve never had such hatred inside me. I thought my heart was broken when I found Victoria in my bed, but I was wrong. It’s broken now. This is what it feels like. It’s not just my heart that’s broken, it’s my whole soul, my whole being. The void that’s been left behind is quickly filling with nothing but anger and bitterness. That sour loathing is starting to poison everything inside me.
Maybe I should just embrace it. If I’m going to be living in their world, I should become one of them. How else will I survive?
I don’t even know what’s happening. I sign some papers—the prenup, maybe. I’m in a daze. I’m led back outside and I get in the same car. Ronnie and his accomplice are still sitting in the front seat. We drive, and soon I’m back at the motel where they had me this morning.
No words are spoken between us as they drag me up to the same room. I get in and sit on the edge of the bed. I stare at the brown stain on the floor and take a deep breath.
This is it. This is my life now.
Sam’s face appears in my head and I shake it away. I can’t think of her, it’ll only make me feel worse. I should just forget about her. It’s for the best.
Unexpected (Complete Accidental Pregnancy Box Set) Page 64