Lita crossed her arms. “Whatever.” She continued. “I’m right about her, aren’t I? There was an item about you both in the paper.”
“We saw each other for a bit, but it didn’t work out. I was in love with you.”
“Are you still?”
“What do you think?” he said. He sat forward and studied her.
“I’m starting to wonder. Why would you hire someone you’d had, well, an affair with? Why am I not important enough to call? I don’t care how late it was, you said you’d call. Didn’t it cross your mind I might want to talk to you?”
Lorenzo exhaled and ran his hands along the sides of his hair. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I want the truth, Lorenzo, even if it will hurt.”
“Come sit with me.” Lita did and sat near him on the sofa, turning herself toward him. “You are important to me. I’m used to doing things my own way and not answering to anyone, not having anyone to be responsible to or for. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to change,” he said, wanting to stop the hurt in her eyes. “We didn’t sign a contract with her. I think Lee was wondering about her. He said he wanted to think about it. If it’ll make you feel better, we’ll go with someone else.”
“How about a man this time?”
Lorenzo chuckled. “I’ll see what I can do. I know my past gives you reason to be suspicious, but I don’t see how this is going to work if you don’t trust me. I always believed you did, but I can see you don’t, not anymore.” He tried to sound like he didn’t care, but his heart gripped, as if someone had torn open his chest and squeezed it.
“I did trust you, but things are different now. You’re not just my brother’s friend or my protector. You’re my fiancé, my husband.”
“Not yet, not ever if you can’t trust me.”
“Is that a threat?”
“No, it’s the truth.” He needed her to believe in him, even if he didn’t.
Lita looked away. “You promise nothing happened with her?”
“I promise. Nothing happened. Maybe I flirt sometimes, but can you say you don’t? I can’t promise I won’t look at other women. I can’t promise I won’t flirt. But I can promise to be faithful to you. I think I can do that.”
“You think? You don’t sound sure. This is harsh, you know? We haven’t even been a couple for two weeks and you’re already tempted?” Lita rubbed her thighs, still averting her eyes from him.
“This is why I stayed away from you. I knew you wouldn’t be able to accept my past, or how I am around women.” She was too good for him, too naïve and sweet. He shook his head and stood.
“No, I accept you. It’s enough, if you can be faithful. I only hope I’ll be enough.” She studied her hands, her voice low and unsure.
Enough? How could she not know? “I should have left you alone. I shouldn’t have given in to what I wanted. I should’ve protected you.”
“I don’t need protecting from you. I love you,” Lita said. She rose, faced him, and took his hand. “You’re going to be my husband. I’ve known since the first time we kissed.” She edged closer. He focused on the door. He should leave before it was too late. “You know you can’t stay away from me. You know if you leave you still won’t be free of me,” Lita whispered.
She moved her hands up his chest and leaned toward him. He gazed down at her and she turned her face up to him, returning his look.
Her eyes sparked and her smile curved seductively. She slid her hands around the back of his neck, pressing herself to him. He let out a small sound of pleasure and kissed her. He couldn’t leave, never. She responded as he drew her closer, his hands pressed on the small of her back. She parted her lips, letting his searching tongue find hers, giving a little moan as he moved his hands down, gripping, pulling her up. Her skirt hiked as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He carried her to the couch. She would fill the emptiness in him. Leaning them both down, he straddled her, supporting himself as he continued his exploration of her full, warm mouth. She was tiny and delicate beneath him, her hand cupped his chin. No. He stopped and got up. Lita lay there, her eyes wide.
“Uncle and Celeste are waiting. We better get back in there,” he said, not very convincingly.
“Just a few more minutes?” Lita said, gazing up at him.
He blew out a long breath and closed his eyes. “In a few more minutes, I’ll have to take you upstairs and I promised you I wouldn’t.” And Lee, and Carlo, only Uncle Enzo hadn’t asked, yet. Everyone was in his business, except him.
Lita still reclined, her hands fluttered over her skirt.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he said. “I only have so much restraint.”
“I’m sorry.” How could she look so disappointed when this was her choice?
She excused herself to freshen up, smoothing her skirt and hair as she walked out. He exhaled. His stomach flip-flopped. He hadn’t been so indecisive and unsure in years. It was as unfamiliar as how Lita made him feel.
Lorenzo walked into the kitchen alone, almost expressionless. Uncle Enzo’s smile faded into a dark frown.
“Where is Lita?”
“Freshening up. Everything okay in here?” Lorenzo grinned as he stood next to the table.
Uncle Enzo nodded and his face relaxed. Lita entered a moment later and walked to Lorenzo. He put his arms around her.
“I’m glad to see you’ve worked things out,” Uncle Enzo said. He glanced at Celeste before frowning again at Lorenzo. “I must remind you, Lita is my niece and I will not see her hurt. However, I want you both to know how happy I am for you, so, with your permission, I would like to give you an engagement party the weekend before Christmas. Celeste has agreed to help me with the planning.”
“Thank you,” Lorenzo said. He and Uncle Enzo stared at each other. The irritation Lorenzo felt was reflected in his uncle’s look.
Lita protested, but Uncle Enzo held up his hands. “Let me do this, please. It will bring me great joy.” Lita smiled and agreed, thanking him and Celeste. “Will the twentieth suit? I hope Janetta and Celeste’s granddaughter Gina will be home by then.”
The four talked a bit more about the plans until Celeste said she should be going.
“I’m sorry we didn’t have a chance to make amaretti, Lita. I hope to next time.”
“I’ll be baking tomorrow morning. Would you like to come over again?”
“Please do, you could join us for lunch. Vittorio will be here as well. We would appreciate your company,” Uncle Enzo said.
Celeste paused. Please say yes and distract this man from Lita and me.
“Yes, thank you,” Celeste said. Lorenzo smiled.
“Now, shall I drive you home?”
Before she could answer, Lorenzo cut in. “I’ll take her home, Uncle Enzo. It’s right near my place and I should go too.”
Uncle Enzo started to protest, but stopped with a look from Celeste. Lita leaned against him, fingering his hands. Celeste took Uncle Enzo’s arm and they walked into the foyer for her coat.
“Why didn’t you let him drive Celeste?” Lita whispered.
“I’ll call you when I get home.” He kissed her neck and grasped her hand. “Walk me out?”
Lita nodded. He escorted Celeste to his car, Lita and Uncle Enzo watched from the front door. She looked as confused and hurt as Lorenzo felt.
Lorenzo and Celeste sat in silence as they drove away until he thanked her for stepping in when he argued with his uncle.
“I’m glad I could help.”
“I would’ve left if you hadn’t been there.” He blew out a breath.
“Did you have something on your mind?”
“You must’ve noticed how naïve Lita is. We already have problems. I’ve spent the last two years convincing myself she’s too young and she’d be happier without me. But now…”
“Yes, but I also see she loves you. If you both are sure marriage is what you want, I don’t see the problem. You are not your father, remember that.
Could you really leave Lita if you decided she would be happier?”
“Maybe, if I left town. Do you think she’d be better off without me?”
“No, do you?”
“I don’t know. She’s young. She could find someone else.”
“Did Nick? He told me you know the truth. Is that what you want for Lita? I know Nick is happy now, but I can tell you he spent a lot of rough years trying to forget your mother before he found that feeling again. If your mother was here, what do you think she would say?”
“She’d tell me to stop doubting and questioning and just love Lita.”
“That sounds like good advice.”
“Thanks.”
“I loved your mother very much,” Celeste said when Lorenzo pulled up outside the market. “I know she would have been over the moon about your engagement to Lita. Have faith, as she did. Miracles happen every day.” She patted him on the cheek, as his mother used to, something he wouldn’t let anyone else do. She thanked him for the ride and they said goodbye.
Parking his car, he frowned. He didn’t believe in miracles, not even the little ones his mother had wanted for him, like faith, forgiveness, and love. Yet he loved Lita, though he sometimes wished he didn’t.
When Lorenzo walked into his apartment, he hung up his coat, took off his shoes, grabbed the phone, went into his room, lay on the bed, and called Lita, as promised. It took her seven rings to answer and he laughed at her flustered hello.
“I thought you’d be waiting for my call.”
“I was just getting changed.”
Lorenzo was silent a moment, contemplating that picture. “Lita, would you get married to someone else if I weren’t around?”
“No. I would…I don’t know.”
“You’d have married someone else,” he said, thinking of Uncle Enzo’s comment about his cousin Joe before he’d gone to Italy.
“Probably you would have too.”
“No. I’ve never wanted to marry anyone before.”
“Really? What about Tamara?”
“I wouldn’t marry her. I wanted to be with you, but I convinced myself you were better off without me.” For some reason, being on the phone made him able to say things he couldn’t in person.
“I’m not. Please stop thinking that. When we’re happy, I’m more myself with you than anyone else. Please don’t take that from me. It feels too good.”
“Earlier felt good. What’re you wearing?”
“Lorenzo…”
“Tell me.” He wouldn’t ask her that usually, either, but being on the phone was less personal, less real.
“A pink lace bra and panties.”
Lorenzo leaned back further, making the sound some people make when they eat a luscious dessert.
“Are you lying down?” he asked.
“No.”
“Well?”
“Okay,” Lita responded.
Lorenzo closed his eyes, remembering how it had been when they’d made up earlier.
“I’m on top of you,” he said, his voice low, teasing, and hoarse. “We kiss. I slide my hands under you. I can feel you--”
“Stop, I…just stop.” He heard the pleading in her tone, her embarrassment.
“Why?” Not even phone sex?
“For one thing, it’s embarrassing. For another, I would, well, I’d rather you were here, but then I don’t. This is really difficult.”
“Yeah,” Lorenzo said. He shifted and put an arm behind his neck.
“Please, I wish you understood. I want you too, really. When you…I didn’t want to stop. I probably would’ve gone upstairs with you if I thought no one would know. But they’d know and I’d know and I’d feel bad about it. It’d be too fast, and then what? We’d live there, in your apartment? I want to just be together. There will be plenty of time after we’re married for...I know we could get married sooner, but I want to raise our children in the church. I want to give them what I didn’t have.”
“I know you need time.” He exhaled slowly. “So, do I get some kind of prize for self-control, or what?” He chuckled.
“You get me,” Lita whispered.
“I will, won’t I? I need to arrange for a nice long honeymoon. Okay?”
“Yes. Better than okay.”
“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow. What time?”
“As early as you want, I’ll be here.”
“I’ll be there by five. I love you, Lita.”
“I love you. Goodnight,” she said.
He held the phone, even after she hung up, not wanting to lose the connection. Sighing, he finally replaced the phone in the cradle and finished getting ready for bed.
11
Lorenzo had dinner with Lita and his uncle the next evening. He was still irritated with Uncle Enzo, who seemed to believe he needed to chaperone them every moment. And Lita didn’t show any sign of minding this constant supervision, but smiled and chatted happily.
He could barely concentrate on work that week, so he did the minimum before he headed to the gym every day. He supposed he could go see Lita, but berated himself for his eagerness. At five o’clock on Friday, he entered Uncle Enzo’s quietly and listened to Lita and his uncle talking. He stopped and watched her a moment, frowning at her tweed skirt and beige sweater. He walked over, kissed her cheek, and grinned at Uncle Enzo. Uncle Enzo shot back the same false smile.
“Is that what you’re wearing later?” Lorenzo said.
“No, of course not,” she said, draining pasta in a large colander.
He sat down with Uncle Enzo. Lorenzo scrunched his napkin. He missed the easy exchanges he and his uncle used to have.
“I’ll change before we go. Vittorio and Celeste were here for lunch.”
“Thanks,” he and Uncle Enzo said as she brought penne in tomato cream sauce to the table, already set, complete with wine and salad.
“You think of everything,” Lorenzo said.
Lita smiled, he looked away. It shouldn’t be possible to feel so good without being drunk or having some other stimulation. But he did. Lita intoxicated him, mellowed him like a few glasses of 1979 Vin Santo di Coltibuono, sweet and light, with acidic undertones and a radiant finish.
“Did you call Janetta?” Uncle Enzo asked.
“Yes,” Lorenzo said in between bites. “She said she’d try us for a week in the Spring. Hopefully she’ll take the job.”
“Be nice to her and maybe she will,” Uncle Enzo said with his eyebrows raised. He disapproved of the teasing, sometimes disrespectful comments Lorenzo and Janetta made to each other. “She’ll be home for your party. You can start then.”
After dinner, he and Uncle Enzo played a game of chess in Uncle Enzo’s sitting room while he waited for Lita.
“Now you and Lita are engaged again, I must remind you to act like the gentleman your mother raised you to be, not the cad you’ve been since college.” Lorenzo opened his mouth to protest, but stopped when Uncle Enzo held up his hand. “I’m not finished. I know you think it’s none of my business, but Lita is my niece, more like my granddaughter. She is a good girl. I know her beliefs and wishes. There will be nothing going on upstairs that wouldn’t happen downstairs. Do I make myself clear?”
“Plenty. You all expect me to turn into my father. And I’m going to be bullied into this church wedding by all of you, too.”
Uncle Enzo checkmated him. Lorenzo scowled and crossed his arms.
“I know you are not your father, thank God. No one is bullying you. We support Lita in what she wants. Did you think she would run off to Vegas with you or something?”
Lorenzo clenched his jaw. “That would be great. You expect me to be happy we have to wait six months?”
“Yes, you should be happy such a good, innocent woman agreed to be your wife. What the hell is wrong with you? Isn’t this what you’ve been waiting for?”
“Yes, and I could wait longer, but I need…” Lorenzo stopped and rubbed his thighs. He didn’t want to bring up certain things to his
uncle.
“Sex? Is that what this is about?” Sometimes his uncle surprised him.
“You know, then. I haven’t been without it longer than a couple weeks since I was fifteen.” He had now, though.
“I…” Uncle Enzo paused and sighed. “I understand, but if you want Lita in your life, you have to do things her way.”
“You mean your way?” Lorenzo said. Uncle Enzo raised his eyebrows, ready for a fight. Lorenzo knew he was wrong but wouldn’t back down now. “I know her better than you. I know what she wants.”
“Now see here…” Uncle Enzo started but stopped when Lita entered the room.
Lorenzo drew in a breath. He hadn’t seen her looking so sexy in a long time. She wore a short black dress, asymmetrical, bare on one smooth shoulder, black hose and high black heels. If his uncle wasn’t there, he’d sling her over his shoulder and find out what she had on underneath. He cleared his throat.
“Are you two okay?” she asked.
“Of course, my dear,” Uncle Enzo said. “You look lovely. What time will you be home?”
“We’re getting an early start, so maybe around midnight,” Lorenzo replied.
“I won’t wait up then. You have a key. I expect you will make sure she gets home safe and sound.”
Lorenzo nodded.
“You’re beautiful,” Lorenzo said as he watched Lita slide into the deep leather seat of his car. Her skirt rose to reveal the gentle curve of her thigh.
“Thanks,” she said after he got in and drove away. “You look handsome, as always.”
He glanced at her, she blushed. Lorenzo laughed.
At the club, they had a few drinks at a table. Lorenzo surveyed the room. It wasn’t too crowded yet, so he asked Lita to dance. He watched her sometimes lose herself in the beat of the music, moving her arms and hips seductively, but each time she saw Lorenzo looking at her, she lost her rhythm. As the club got more packed, Lorenzo noticed more men around Lita, eyeing her. He escorted her back to their table, excused himself, and told her to stay there. When he returned, he couldn’t find her. His stomach dropped, his mind swirled with what could have happened to her. Then he saw her by the back door, talking to someone, a man.
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