She dropped her arms from my neck, and I immediately felt empty. I slowly pushed away from her, and we both headed toward the shallow end, neither of us saying anything. My brain felt like a tornado had blown straight through it, twisting my thoughts into a confused, jumbled mess.
How did I feel about her? How did she feel about me? Crap, was she still hot for that stupid tool Kyle? I really didn’t think so, not anymore, though I still worried. Worried more that she thought of me as that annoying guy who owed her a few swim lessons.
I didn’t know. And I didn’t know how to ask her, either. I was just left questioning everything.
After tonight’s swim lesson, I was more confused than ever.
Chapter Fifteen
JAKE
“So come on, tell me the truth. You like the new girl, don’t you?” Brian asked conversationally as we were gathering wood for that night’s bonfire.
I stopped tossing a few logs into the wheelbarrow beside me, wiping the sweat off my forehead with my wrist, since my hands were covered with work gloves to prevent splinters from getting into my skin. “I’m pleading the fifth.”
“What? Get the hell out. Just admit it.” Brian tossed a bundle of kindling in his wheelbarrow and glanced around before he returned his gaze to me. “No one else is nearby. Your secret is safe with me.”
Should I trust him? We weren’t that close—not because we didn’t like each other, but because he chose to spend all of his free time with Hannah. I understood why, too. They were totally into each other. Hannah was cute and nice, and she seemed like fun. They made a good couple. I could even admit I was sort of envious of what they shared.
“Yeah,” I reluctantly admitted. “I like her. But I can’t do anything about it because of the rules. And my uncle really holds me to them, too.”
Brian made an irritated face. “Screw the rules, man. Everyone pairs up around here all the time, especially the junior counselors and the last-year campers. What are you, seventeen?”
I nodded and grabbed my water bottle, taking a long swig. It was hot as hell out here today, and we were doing manual labor under the blazing sun. I couldn’t wait to get back to the lake so I could jump in and cool off before I resumed lifeguard duty.
“And she’s gotta be what? Sixteen?”
“I’ve never asked her,” I said after I took another drink. Maybe I should. Crap, what if she was fifteen or…fourteen? Fourteen was practically a freakin’ baby.
“She’s with the last-year bunk, so she has to be sixteen. Don’t get your panties in a twist. She’s not some tween you’re fantasizing about.” Brian laughed and shook his head. “I mean, seriously, what’s the big deal if you two wanted to hang out? How’s that a crime? I’ll even let you in on my own secret.” He took a few steps closer, like he was going to share something particularly juicy. “Last year, Hannah and I hooked up.”
“So?”
“So I was a nineteen-year-old counselor who’d just finished with my freshman year of college and Hannah was sixteen and only done with her junior year in high school.” I raised my eyebrows and he laughed. “But who gives a shit? I thought she was cute, she was into me, so yeah. We started hanging out and I really got to know her. We liked each other. When the summer was over, we went our separate ways but still kept in contact, you know?”
“Really?”
He nodded, looking sheepish. “I went and saw her during part of winter break, just before Christmas. Stayed the week at her parents’ house and had to sleep in her older brother’s room, since he’d moved out the year before last. It was kind of weird. Her parents didn’t know what to think of us.”
“Wow, you two were really trying to make this work.” I was surprised. I never thought much of these camp relationships. Always figured they were brief flings before the summer was over.
“We’re in love,” he admitted. “She graduated from high school in June, and she’s going to UNC with me in the fall.”
“Seriously? Are you guys moving in together?” I asked.
“Nah, she’s living in the dorms while I’m off campus, but we’re definitely serious about each other.” Brian slipped off his work gloves and stretched his fingers out. “I’m just trying to tell you that if you really like this girl, don’t let that stupid rule get in the way. You’re only a year apart. It’s no big deal. You can either go your separate ways at the end of summer, or you can stay in contact and see if you could really make this work.”
Huh. Who knew Brian was such a romantic, or that he and Hannah had such a serious relationship? They were in love. They were going to the same college together. It sort of blew my mind, but then again, if you cared about someone—really loved someone, you’d do whatever it took to be together.
I didn’t know if I’d ever be capable of loving someone. I had my own issues I really hadn’t dealt with and still wasn’t sure if I wanted to. Like the death of my mother and the loss of the dad I once had. He wasn’t the same person any longer, but neither was I. We hadn’t been getting along for years. He’d threatened me more than once that he would kick me out of the house if I didn’t get my act together. And I’d countered by threatening to run away. It was a threat we made a lot and we knew we didn’t mean it, which meant they were both empty threats. So stupid.
So pointless.
We were a mess, my dad and I. Maybe he’d been right all along, and coming here for the summer really was a good thing. We needed to spend some time apart. I could even admit I sort of missed him.
I should call him later, from the office phone, see if he was missing me, too. Uncle Bob would let me. I should invite Dad to come see me for the weekend, though I don’t know if he could, what with his work schedule. At the very least, it would be good to hear his voice.
“It’s ghost story night,” Brian told me as he slipped back on his work gloves and we both grabbed our wheelbarrows, redirecting ourselves so we were headed back to the bonfire pit. “And we have a special guest.”
“What are you talking about?” I followed along beside him, doing my best to avoid the ruts in the trail.
“It’s pretty cool, actually. Nancy from arts and crafts will dress up like some creepy old lady. Like, she becomes totally unrecognizable with the makeup she puts on, plus the costume and the wig. Anyway, she sits in a special rocking chair we only bust out once a year and tells these super-creepy stories that freaks everyone’s shit out. The younger kids aren’t allowed to participate, since Nancy really lays on the scary drama, and they’d be out of their damn minds, but everyone else loves it.” Brian smiled. “It’ll be a perfect opportunity for you to get close to your girl and offer her some comfort in her time of frightened need.”
I started to laugh at Brian’s choice words. “You’ve got this all figured out, don’t you?”
“Dude, I spent all of last summer trying to figure out ways to get Hannah alone. Even if we weren’t totally one-on-one, I was plotting how I could hold her hand, touch her somehow without anyone noticing. I’ve got it down to a fine-tuned skill, let me tell you.”
What he said hung in my mind long after we went our separate ways. I was headed toward the lake, thinking of the many different scenarios that could happen tonight between Annie and me. I could wrap my arm around her shoulders, tuck her close to my side. Or maybe hold her hand to calm her down. I could hug her. I could let her press her face against my chest. Hell, I could kiss her, too, if that was what she really wanted.
I’d do just about anything she wanted me to. I was sick of worrying about what would happen if we got caught. I was too caught up in Annie to worry about anything else.
I was so wrapped up in my thoughts I didn’t notice the girl who was coming at me full speed from the opposite side of the trail. She practically ran straight into me without stopping, and I reached out to grab her, holding her in place.
“Jake! Just the man I’m looking for.” She bounced away from me, her smile wide, her long, wavy, dark blond hair swinging past her shoulder
s. She was cute, with bright blue eyes and a great smile, but she wasn’t as pretty as Annie. I recognized her immediately, though I didn’t know her name. She was one of the girls from Annie’s cabin, so what would she want from me?
“What’s up, ahh…?” My mind drew a complete blank.
“Presley,” she filled in for me.
“Yeah, Presley. Why are you looking for me?”
“Well, I wanted to ask you a question.” She looked up at me, her expression pure innocence. I knew I couldn’t trust her. “I was hoping you’d sit with me at the bonfire tonight. The ghost stories are supposed to be extra spooky,” she added as a temptation.
Huh. This girl was playing dirty. She had to know Annie and I had a little something going on, even if we hadn’t properly confirmed it. Yet she had no problem basically asking me out.
“Uh, I’m sorry, but no can do,” I said as gently as I could. “I have to work tonight.”
Her face fell a little, though that smile of hers never really faltered. “Oh, I can help you!”
“Fozzie Bear doesn’t like it when the campers mess with fire. It’s against camp policy. Only counselors can help set and maintain the fire.”
“Aw, well maybe some other time, then?” she asked.
“Maybe,” I said, though I didn’t mean it. I had no plans to ever spend any one-on-one time with her.
I was hoping to save that all for Annie.
“Okay, see you around.” She leaped forward and before I could stop her, before I could even utter a word of protest, she pressed a kiss to my cheek and then bounded away. I stood watching her go, too in shock that she pulled something like that, but how mad could I be? It was just a stupid kiss on the cheek.
It meant absolutely nothing.
…
ANNIE
“Tonight ought to be interesting,” Gwen said as she bent closer to the mirror, carefully applying black liquid eyeliner to her eyelid. No one could do a cat eye like Gwen.
“Why do you say that?” I stood next to her in front of the mirror. We were getting ready before dinner. I didn’t put on much makeup because I was an utter fail at applying it compared to the rest of the girls in my cabin, but I could manage a little eyeliner and some mascara.
Gwen stood up straight, her gaze meeting mine as I did the same. “It’s our annual special edition ghost story night, when Nancy dresses up as a creepy old lady and tells even creepier ghost stories.”
“Sounds fun.”
“It definitely is.” Gwen capped her liquid eyeliner and threw it into her makeup bag. “The stories are so scary, it’s when most of the guys take advantage of getting a girl to sit close to them. Offer them comfort, so to speak.”
I thought of who I’d want to sit next to if I was extra scared—and it wasn’t Kyle anymore.
It was Jake.
“It’s basically the only time we can make out in front of everyone and we won’t get in trouble,” Gwen added sarcastically before she started to laugh. “It’s a total hookup night.”
“Oh, well.” I smiled helplessly, wishing I had something interesting to say, but I was at a total loss for words. All I could think about was Jake. Sitting with him in the back of the group, where all the older kids hung out. Squeezing his hand tight when I got scared. Feeling his arm sneak around my shoulders as he pulled me close to him. Our lips meeting in our first kiss…
My first kiss. I could only imagine what it might feel like. I’d read enough books, seen plenty of on-screen kisses that looked amazing. I wanted amazing. I wanted my first kiss to be with someone special.
“Who do you want to hook up with tonight?” Gwen asked, her expression curious. “Kyle?”
My heart sank. Not even close, but how could I admit that? I didn’t want them to know I liked Jake. I didn’t want to hear their warnings about how I shouldn’t be involved with a counselor. I knew it was wrong, yet I didn’t care. But I didn’t want everyone to think I still had a crush on Kyle, either.
I didn’t know what to say or how to answer.
“Guess what!” Presley screeched as she ran into the bathroom, her body practically vibrating with excitement.
Gwen sent me a look like she thought Presley was crazy before she turned to her. “What, Pres?”
“I just ran into Jake, like, literally.” Presley giggled as my heart felt like it was sinking even lower. Why was she talking about my Jake? “Out by the lake. We talked for a while. God, he’s so cute!”
I could say nothing, couldn’t even find my voice. It was like it disappeared.
“What did you talk about?” Gwen asked.
“Just dumb stuff. Then I asked him if he’d sit with me tonight.” Presley grinned, looking very pleased with herself.
“And what did he say?” Gwen shot me a look, and I tried my best to keep my expression neutral. I had a feeling she was onto me, but I wasn’t about to say anything.
“Oh, well, that was the disappointing part. He said he couldn’t sit with me, since he had to work. He’s in charge of the bonfire,” Presley explained, like she was imparting secret Jake knowledge to us.
“That’s too bad,” Gwen said.
“Yeah,” I added, my voice scratchy. I cleared my throat.
“Oh, hey. Annie.” Presley turned toward me. “You two are friends, right? You and Jake?”
That’s what I’d told them when they kept questioning me about the arts and crafts paper airplane incident. And the jumping into the waterfall incident. Jake and I were racking up all sorts of incidents, weren’t we? I shrugged, trying to act casual. “Sort of.”
“Maybe you could put in a good word for me. Like I did for you with Kyle.” Presley beamed.
“Wait, what? You talked to Kyle about me?” Dread slithered down my spine, making me cold. At the beginning of the session, I would have been thrilled, but now I was almost scared of what she had to say.
“Oh, yeah. He’s interested.” Presley sent me a sly look, her lips pursed. “Said he’s sick of the same girls every summer. You’re like a breath of fresh air.”
“He actually said that?” Gwen started to laugh. “I find that hard to believe.”
“He did, I swear.” Presley waved a hand, dismissing Gwen. “Whatever. It’s true, Annie. Don’t be surprised if he sits with you tonight. And if anything happens, just remember who you have to thank.” She laughed and started to leave the bathroom, calling over her shoulder, “Me!”
I resumed my position in front of the mirror, trying to apply mascara with a shaky hand and nearly stabbing my eye with the stupid wand. I set the tube on the sink and exhaled loudly.
“Nervous about what Presley did by talking to Kyle?” Gwen shrugged. “She’s relatively harmless. But let me say something up front—no way did Kyle call you a breath of fresh air.”
“Why would you think that?” Her remark stung. Why wouldn’t Kyle say that? Was she jealous? Did she wish Kyle said that about her instead?
“Because Kyle doesn’t say stuff like that. Honestly?” Her gaze met mine in the mirror’s reflection, her expression serious. “Kyle’s not the…smartest guy I know.”
Great. Now was she bashing Kyle? “You really shouldn’t make fun of him, Gwen.”
“I’m not!” She shook her head, looking exasperated. “I’m actually trying to tell you something, friend to friend.” Her voice lowered. “Seriously, he’s as dumb as a rock, Annie. You’re like, a thousand times smarter than him. You could do so much better. Trust me.”
Gwen zipped up her cosmetics bag and smiled softly at me. “Don’t take too long. We’re leaving for dinner in a few minutes.” And with that, she walked out of the bathroom.
Her words rang in my head as I finished applying my mascara with a steadier hand. Maybe Gwen was being serious by letting me know her opinion of Kyle. Maybe she was trying to be a good friend and warn me.
We left for dinner a few minutes later, everyone chatting nonstop as we walked toward the dining hall with the exception of me. I’d been on meal d
etail all day, meaning I was the one who had to go pick up dinner for my table. I was actually looking forward to it. It meant I could get away from the girls for a little bit and their endless gossiping about the boys at camp.
“Tonight is important,” Bobbee said with all the authority of a girl who’d been coming to this camp for over a decade. “Whatever boy you end up with tonight is usually the one you spend the rest of the summer with, even though there’s not much time left. As in, he’s the boy who asks you to next week’s dance.”
I frowned. There was a dance? Oh God. Just thinking about it made my stomach feel like it was full of a hundred buzzing, angry bees.
“What if you don’t end up with any boy?” Kelsey asked, sounding worried. Not that I could blame her. She hadn’t shown even a hint of interest in any guy, and all of the other girls thought she was kind of weird. Not that they’d ever say that to her face, but I heard their whispers. They talked about her behind her back. They talked about one another behind their backs.
I’m sure they’d talked about me, too.
“Then you’re doomed to spend the rest of the summer alone,” Kaycee announced, making everyone laugh, except for Kelsey.
Except for me.
We entered the dining hall, and the girls sat at a table while I went over to start collecting our dinner. It was a simple one tonight—hamburgers and fries—and I ignored the silverware, thankful I wouldn’t have to carry as much back to the table.
“Hey, Annie.”
I glanced to my left to see—oh crap—Kyle standing next to me, a tentative smile on his face. He looked nervous.
And I immediately felt nervous. “Hi, Kyle.”
“What are you doing?”
“Um, getting dinner?” Fairly obvious, right? Gwen’s earlier words rang clear in my head.
I pushed them to the back of my brain, trying to ignore them.
“Right.” He laughed. Shrugged. Looked around. Shoved his hands into the front pockets of his shorts. “So are you going to be around later tonight? During the ghost stories?”
My heart thumped erratically against my ribs, and my mouth went dry. Did Presley really talk to him about me after all? This was my chance. The opportunity I’d been waiting for since the day I got here.
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