Losing her current pack, her home, her friends, would devastate her. Amie loved the people of Coyote Bluff. They accepted her for her quirky self, laughed at her pranks and let her be crazy when she needed to be. Would she be able to find another place like that? Would Skip be forced to contact the surrounding areas and have her driven across the country like Ian had been?
“Hey. What’s going on in that squirrely head of yours?”
Zeke’s question froze her for a moment. Long enough for her to gather some semblance of control and turn back to him. “Sorry. Got lost in my thoughts there for a minute.”
The smile she attempted fell flat, but that’s all she could muster. She needed to finish dinner. She’d deal with the after when they’d finished. Maybe she could take one of his meds and sleep off some of the time. Immediate chagrin had her ducking. Stealing painkillers from someone was bad enough, but what if Zeke needed her and she was too incapacitated to help? No. She’d keep it together until he was well. Then they could deal with what was happening inside her head.
The hand that wrapped around her wrist made her jump and squeak. Looking back she found a serious Zeke watching her. “You can talk to me, you know that. I’m a good listener. Share your internal talks with me. Ya never know, it might help to let some of the crazy out.”
Amie took a hesitant step toward him, closing the gap between them. He still held her wrist loosely in his hand. The heat soothed her, bled slowly into her body from that single contact point and made her want so much more than she’d ever hoped for. He drew her the last few inches to him and rolled enough to use his other hand to push up to a sitting position.
She’d been processing the feel of his skin on hers and the slow melting of her anxiety when a groan of pain brought her out of her thoughts with a jerk.
“Damn it. I’m a bad nurse. Let me help you.” She bustled around, sliding her wrist from his grasp, pulling him up until he was seated and then pushing all of the pillows behind his back to give him something to rest against. “There. Lie back and relax while I finish up dinner.”
“Wait.” Again he stopped her with a gentle hand on her arm. Before she could resist him or notice the determination in his eyes, he yanked her down to his lap. He turned her and moved her body until a satisfied grunt came from his smiling face. “You want to make me feel better? Sit here for a minute with me, let me hold you the way I’ve wanted to for months.”
Thick arms wrapped around her and she couldn’t help but snuggle into his embrace. This is where she’d wanted to be too, and from the purring vibrating her brain it seemed her kitty wanted to be there as well. She may have sighed and wiggled her butt a little to get more comfortable. It might have been her that buried her nose in his neck so she could suck his scent into her body, but it didn’t matter. She could blame the entire thing on the fact that she needed to be in the cabin with Zeke, needed to fix her mistakes and didn’t want to get in trouble for being a bad nurse.
Her cat chuffed at the lie, but Amie let it go. She’d deal with the need she felt for the man after. After they snuggled, after dinner, after he was healed. Until then she could give in and enjoy the feeling of someone holding her, loving her, and let her mind fill with ideas of joy, contentment and happy-ever-after that she’d never given herself permission to hope for before.
“This is nice, isn’t it?”
She smiled, lips pressed against his skin, as she still kept her face pressed into his neck. The feel of his deep voice vibrating against her mouth made her crave a taste. Just a single lick; that’s all she wanted. Her cat perked up and pushed to do it, her furball wanted to know what their mate tasted like again.
“Did you know that you growl slightly when you and your kitty are fighting?”
The noise she’d heard going on, but ignored because she breathed through the pressure her bobcat was exerting on her body, cut off. Shit. She’d been making that rumbling racket?
“I bet she really wants to come out and meet me, doesn’t she? Do you want to shift and let me pet her? I’d love to snuggle with your kitty.”
Amie didn’t move. She had locked down her muscles and still could feel the push of fur through her pores. Panic swelled as her jaw began to shift, bones moved slowly under the skin, and her teeth changed, lengthening. With a more-than-human move she vaulted off the bed, backing away from a completely flummoxed Zeke. “No. I can’t shift now. She’s too powerful and I’m not sure I can control us once I’m in animal form. She wants you too badly. What if she hurts you or something?”
Cornered. She was stuck again. Amie couldn’t run outside, couldn’t hide. Pain blossomed in her palms as her fingernails changed to claws and dug into her hands. She was going to shift and the thought of bonding in animal form to Zeke, or worse, had her searching for someplace to hole up. Maybe in the bathroom? Could she suffer through being locking in a room again?
“Hey. Easy.” Zeke sounded like he was miles away. His voice soothing both the panicked woman and the pushy cat. “Deep breaths, baby. You are fine, your kitty is fine. I’m not going to hurt you and you won’t hurt me. She can come out after you feed me dinner.”
Amie tried to focus on his words as she listened to his instructions. She needed to finish the food and feed their mate. That thought finally broke through her cat’s one track mind and made the animal’s control falter. They both wanted to take care of Zeke, make him better, especially seeing they were the reason for his pain.
“That’s right. You need to feed me. I’m an invalid, remember? Take care of your mate first, then we’ll worry about shifting.” His soft crooning washed over her.
How he knew what she’d been thinking was beyond her comprehension at the moment, but his words did exactly what she couldn’t. They pushed her bobcat part back enough so she could get control again. She just hoped it would last enough for decisions to be made or Zeke would find himself mated against his will.
*****
He’d made a promise to himself that he wouldn’t push Amie, but the panic flooding the air between them as her cat peeked at him from slowly morphing eyes told him enough. She didn’t have a good handle on her animal side, and whatever they’d been through had caused quite a chasm to form. If her cat had enough will to force a shift and had started to succeed he knew they had trust issues to address. The most pressing being the trust between the human and animal sides within Amie.
His heart broke for her as he watched her hunker down, rolling her shoulders as though she was trying to ward off an attack. How had she survived without going insane? Zeke had seen others with bad relationships with their animals, or those who’d lost mates and, in turn, had an animal trapped inside which wanted to go feral. From the short time he’d spent in the cabin with Amie he could see symptoms of both problems.
The coyote he shared a spirit with whined. Yeah, buddy, we’ll get them fixed up. And they would, if it took every second of the rest of their lives. He and his pup were in tune. Their mate meant more than anything else in the world.
“Deep breaths, babe. Center your thoughts on your intake of breath. Relax.” He tried to coach without making her feel even more self-conscious about what was happening. She nodded and seemed to be taking his advice, slowing her inhales and exhales. “It’s too bad we can’t take a ride. I’d love to get you in my Shelby so we could zoom down the road with the wind in our hair. Nothing as relaxing as that.”
A small snicker came from her. She turned to face him. “I do love that car.”
Sure, he was trying to give her something else to think about, but he definitely loved his baby girl, his pride and joy, his fully restored from bumper to bumper Shelby Cobra. He sighed. Now, if he could get Amie spread across the hood of that car? Naked?
A growl of pure need rolled up his throat as the image continued and changed into a full blown fantasy. He could smell the heated oil within the engine that would perfume the air once they parked. The feel of night would pull them both to be a little reckless and she’d
beg for him to park in the field by his house. With little prompting she’d strip off some little summer dress and reveal her beautiful naked skin, smiling naughtily over her shoulder before strolling to the hood. Climbing gently onto the warm metal would give him a perfect view of her wet-slicked thighs and pussy lips before she turned over and beckoned with a finger. She’d spread her legs and let moonlight caress her thighs as he drank his fill of her pussy.
“Wow, when you go off in your own little world it must be fucking hot because the lust you are giving off is so thick I could cut it with a knife. I know you’re trying to cheer me up and get me focused back on the human side of things, but damn, boy. Tone it down or I’ll be eating dinner off that fine set of abs you have.”
A moment passed, then two. Zeke had been so lost in his thoughts, in the dream he so wanted to be true, that it took him far too long to wade out of the warm and sex-filled thoughts. He finally blinked a couple of times and came face to face with a flushed and grinning Amie. He would have felt bad about the daydream if she hadn’t been torturing him for months and forcing him to fight the mate pull. Even as he internally groaned about the lack of finesse he was employing while he was given another chance to woo her, he grinned.
“Can’t help it. You’re sexy, I want you and I’m all drugged up. Can you blame me? My mate is cooking for me, and is stuck with my sorry ass long enough I can maybe get a decent kiss or some groping from you?”
He wanted to keep it light and playful. Amie looked more in control and her stress-tightened shoulders seemed to have relaxed some. And, hell, he wasn’t lying. He’d wanted to kiss her, really kiss her, for weeks and weeks. The first time he’d caught a glimpse of his little troublesome pixie he’d wanted to swoop in and plant a sloppy one on her.
Amie snorted and shook her head. “I’m going to pull dinner off the stove and we’ll eat. Then perhaps it’s time I told you my story, because I’m a damaged girl, inside and out. You’re right, I need to tell someone, and you’re also right that you should at least be given some of it so you can understand my reluctance.” She stood there for a moment and nodded, like she’d decided something of importance before turning to the kitchenette.
Watching Amie in her element, moving around the small kitchen, was sensual torture. She moved like a dancer performing a well-rehearsed favorite. Sure, being a shifter gave her more grace than a normal human, but the fluidity of her cooking, stirring, tasting, tending, was like watching the best skin-a-Max show ever. Sexy enough to be relegated to paid-for-television but safe enough for it to be shown on cable.
“All you need is a white apron. Hm, and perhaps be naked. Yeah, that would do it. Then this show would be perfect.” He smiled behind his hand as a blush rushed up her neck and across her cheeks. He couldn’t help but tease her. He added a little growl to his next words. “You’d look good enough to eat. The perfect dessert. Sweet, tangy and wild, exactly how I like my honey.”
A groan so full of need floated to him on a wisp of a sigh. She turned just her head, pausing long enough to glare at him before plating noodles of some sort. When she bent over to grab something from a bag at her feet he bit his tongue, until she put a little waggle in her hips and giggled at his moan of frustration. “Oh, you minx. You’re lucky I can’t move without hurting myself or you’d be sorry.”
She chuckled again. Damn girl bubbled over with laughter as she continued to prepare their meal. He’d get her back for teasing him, but not yet. First he’d let her think she was getting something over on him. Because, truly, he would be a hurting pup if he jumped up and took her the way he wanted, but after an afternoon of rest he was feeling much better. The blisters had all reduced in size and most looked like small rash patches. He itched more than he ached, but he was improving very quickly. He could deal with the urge to scratch at his skin if he could get his wayward, reluctant, gorgeous mate to snuggle with him.
Zeke sat back with a sigh on his makeshift seat with pillows mounded behind him and just enjoyed the show. Amie finished with a flourish of parmesan cheese and ground pepper before grabbing the two heaping plates. The smells were fantastic, but to see what she’d created was amazing. Small rounded piles of thin noodles held a creamy sauce dotted with chicken. Tiny green leaf pieces, parsley he guessed, gave the sauce some color and covered the meat as if they were speckled bird eggs. The plates looked like pieces of art. No wonder she’d spend so much time over them sprinkling, studying and tsking.
“This looks awesome.”
“Thanks.”
Studying Amie for a moment while she fussed over setting down his plate next to him on the bed gave him time to see that, even though she’d thanked him, she didn’t believe it. “This. Looks. Wonderful.”
She glanced up, a tight smile on her lips. “Thanks?”
Nodding, he waited for her to sit with him, and when she turned to head toward the couch he cleared his throat. “Please sit and eat with me. I’d like to share this first meal with you.”
The hesitation just about killed him, but the grudging acceptance of his request righted his thoughts immediately. She grumbled under her breath but perched on the edge of the bed nonetheless.
Instead of watching her fight internal battles, he tucked into the plate. Working with one hand to scoop and swirl pasta took a few tries to figure out, but once he knew how to twirl and shovel he was moaning and groaning over the meal. The taste of fresh herbs blossomed across his tongue. Garlic and onion played second fiddle to basil and thyme. The chicken bites were tender and beautifully cooked. What brought the entire dish together, and gave him a near-orgasm, was the sauce. It was creamy and thick, beautifully seasoned and so decadent he wanted to spread it on her skin just so he could lick it back off. It was sex in a meal, sensual and smooth.
“This is so fucking good.” He groaned with the next mouthful.
Her chuckle brought his gaze to hers. “I’m glad you like it, but you’ve sort of gotten it all over you.”
He glanced down and shrugged when he saw the drips of sauce, strings of pasta and smattering of foodstuffs on the sheet. He didn’t stop his continual spin, open, chew, swallow long enough to even comment on the mess. He was sure it was a compliment someplace in the world if you ended up covered in your meal. Just like that country over in Europe which thought burping was the biggest compliment known in their culture. Zeke fully intended to tell her all of that. After. After he ate so much he couldn’t move.
Chapter Six
Standing at the sink gave Amie a minute to pull herself together. They’d eaten in calm companionable munching, but now? Now they were done. She’d changed the sheets so he wasn’t surrounded by crumbs, the dishes were washed, and the kitchenette had been wiped down. Zeke needed another dose of meds and he was going to be out for the count shortly after that. What the hell was she going to do with herself once he was asleep? Sure, she had her computer so she could surf the internet, but even the idea of sitting still for that long gave her a shiver of panic.
Her bobcat stretched, yawning hugely in the back of her mind. The poor thing hadn’t been out to play enough and couldn’t be allowed out for another few days. A glance at a quiet Zeke showed he was watching her with a strange expression. He wasn’t worried, at least a quick sniff of the air told her as much, but he was definitely studying her.
“Trying to figure me out?”
He grinned and her heart skipped a beat. “I was wondering how you’ve grown up without becoming closer to your animal.”
Not the conversation she expected, but then again he was one of the leading teachers of the pack’s youth. Maybe he’d be able to actually help her make the connection everyone else seemed to have. Her kitty purred and stared at their mate through Amie’s eyes. It would be nice to not have to fight for control all the time, or fear her cat’s reactions to things once she was shifted. Hope washed away some of the anxiety.
“I’ve always had a tough time with her, well not always, but since I was about twelve. There was an
incident that caused some trauma, and since then I’ve had to fight her. Once I shift I don’t have as much control as I should, and I’m terrified I won’t get her back where she belongs.”
He scrunched up his nose before speaking and she couldn’t hide her amusement. Her chuckle drew his eyebrows down. “Don’t laugh at me, woman. I’m trying to figure out if I can help.”
“You’re so damn cute when you do that, though.”
Zeke huffed but his lips quirked with a hidden smirk. “Keep it up. You’ll find yourself over my knee yet.”
“Mm hmm. And you’d have to catch me.”
A flash of lust flared in his eyes before he shook his head. “A discussion to pursue when I’m a little more healed. But now, while I’m down and out, let’s take care of your kitty. Do you trust me? Enough to get you and your animal a little more friendly?”
Taking a moment to think about it led her to an easy answer. “Sure. If you can help I’m all ears. I hate keeping her caged all the time.”
“Come here then.”
“Why?” Even with her cat’s interest getting snagged by the devastating smile he leveled at her, the human part of Amie became really concerned. The sparkle of mischief and perhaps just a hint of challenge had her pushing her shoulders back. “Never mind. Let’s do this thing.”
Just as she went to plop onto the mattress next to Zeke he pulled her onto his lap. Before she could do anything other than gasp in surprise he was snuggling her into his chest, stroking a hand down her back. “Shh, trust me, remember. I want you to relax and talk to me about your cat’s behavior. I’m pretty sure I know what is going on, but she should respond to this well enough for you to release some of your hold on her.”
“You just wanted an excuse to have me in your lap.” Amie grumped even as she wiggled a little to settle better into his embrace. She loved snuggling, partly her cat nature and partly because she never could seem to get enough contact from people once she trusted enough for them to touch her.
Switching Gears: Coyote Bluff Series Book 3 Page 5